Where I Belong

I didn't know what to say couldn't seem to get any words out. The club wasn't full of the usual crowd tonight, only seemed to be club members their old lady's and my family.

"What are you doing?" I whispered looking around myself. All eyes on me and I was starting to feel very uncomfortable.

Taking a few steps toward me I took one back. "Blaze everyone is staring" I hissed. Even though I knew these people and they were family I still didn't like the attention.

"Chill babe I told you I needed to speak to you about something".

"And it has to be here in front of everyone?" I whispered still looking around myself. Catching sight of Ally she was wearing a shit eating grin, Jared was hanging off the bar smirking and everyone else just seemed to be in a really good mood. "You know I love you right?" He asked louder than necessary catching everyone's attention. The club grew quiet like everyone was waiting for him to continue or something to happen.

"Y-yes" I stuttered

"Come here" Holding out his hand I stared at it, once again I took a look around the club. What was he up to? Taking small steps I finally took his outstretched hand.

"You are the love of my life" He whispered his warm breath fanning my ear. "You're the reason I get up in the morning, the reason I want to live. I grew up in this lifestyle Ava, I didn't care about who I hurt or what I had to do to get the job done". "Blaze"....

"Let me finish" nodding behind me he took both my hands in his and held them tightly. "We've been through so much together darlin' but I can't see my life without you in it, without you by my side. It's been a tough few weeks baby". Pressing his palm against my cheek my eyes closed on there own. I had missed him so much. "Now I have something for you".

My heart was hammering so fast I was afraid he was going to ask me the question I had been dreading. I love him with all my heart but I was no where near ready to marry.

"Blaze I-We"....

"Shhh" He whispered cutting me off "it's not what you think I know you're not ready for that yet. Open your eyes baby". And I did.....

There he stood holding my very own cut with the worlds 'Blazes property' in bold letters on the back. I knew in this world, his world this was a big deal. He may as well have got down on one knee and popped the question.

I was lost for words. I knew this was a big deal and there was no way I couldn't accept it. He was proving to everyone that I was his, his old lady and one day his wife. Feeling the corners of my mouth lift I sunk my teeth into my bottom lip. "Are you going to try it on or stand there looking at it" my dad called out causing laughter to erupt around the club. It was the first time I had noticed that every old lady in the place had theirs on. Was this some sort of tradition? I didn't like attention and right now I wanted to go home.

"Can we go home?" The minute the words left my mouth his smile dropped. "Please" I whispered reaching for his hand.

"Course baby head out to the car I just need to speak with your dad" Kissing my forehead he placed the cut over my shoulders.

Jumping in to the passenger side of his truck I removed the cut from my shoulders and held it to my chest. Bringing it to my nose I inhaled deeply taking in the smell of new leather. He got this made for me and I had ruined the moment because I felt uncomfortable with everyone staring at me.

"Such an idiot" I groaned just as the drivers side opened but it wasn't Blaze.

"How so?" Jared asked closing the door behind him.

"That was a big deal for him and I ruined it. Why didn't I just try it on". Sighing I held the cut tighter my nails digging in. I was an idiot a stupid one at that. "Don't even know why he wants to give me it I'm not worth him anymore". "So god help me if you weren't a girl right now I'd punch your teeth in" Jared hissed making me look at him. "He fucking loves you and don't you ever let me hear you say that again you hear me?".

"It's true though" I whispered my mouth suddenly dry. "He deserves-..."

"Don't even finish that sentence". Jared scalded just as he was being pulled out of the truck.

"Prez wants a word" Blaze grumbled taking his seat and slamming the door shut. Holding the cut tightly against my chest I glanced at him from the corner of my eye. I knew he would be pissed that I didn't try it on in front of everyone but I wasn't going to say anything. I hadn't seen him in over a week and the last thing I wanted was an argument.

"How you doing baby?" Reaching over he took hold of my hand. "You good?". Bringing my hand to his lips he kissed my knuckles. "No idea how much I missed you".

"Same Blaze I missed you so much" Squeezing his hand I continued "And to answer your first question I'm just taking each day as it comes. I have good days and sometimes I have bad ones but the gym is helping".

"I thought you looked a little slimmer" He grumbled as well pulled into the driveway.

"Tell my ass that" I grinned as I unbuckled my seatbelt and got out.

"Your ass is just fine darling".....

Chuckling I unlocked the front door and headed straight for the couch. Relaxing into it a sigh left my mouth at how comfortable my body felt against the softness. I didn't realise my eyes were shut until I felt Blazes lips graze against mine. "Going for a shower baby".

"Hmm" was all I could give him. I had been hitting the gym pretty hard and now it was finally catching up with me. Getting to my feet I switched of all the lights, made sure the door was locked and headed to our bedroom. Pushing open the door the first thing I noticed was my cut laying on the bottom of the bed.

I did really want him to see me in it!!

Sinking my teeth into my bottom lip I pulled my top over my head and my trouser off so I was left standing in my underwear. Smiling to my self I unhooked my bra and slipped my arms through my cut, a shiver rocking through my body at the feel of the cool leather against my bare skin.

I wanted to feel sexy! I wanted him to find me sexy.

Releasing my hair from my hair tie I stood in front of my mirror the smile falling from my face as soon as I saw it. One little look at that disgusting scar on my thigh and the little bit of confidence I had built disappeared as fast as it came. If only I realised Blaze had entered the room...

"Damn baby"....

Jumping slightly I pulled the cut tightly over my chest with two hands. "I thought you were going for a shower?" I felt stupid. He had seen me naked before and yet in this moment I wished I hadn't taken my clothes off. I felt vulnerable, I felt disgusting. He wasn't going to want to see me like this?! That scar on my leg will always be the reminder. I knew what he was thinking every time he saw it, I saw the pain in his eyes. "Baby-....."

"Don't" I whispered cutting him off as he started to walk towards me "Please just go for a shower, please Blaze".

Holding his hands up a sigh escaped his lips "You're beautiful darlin' inside and out. Don't ever fucking forget that".

And then he did as I asked. Finally hearing the water running I quickly grabbed my sweat pants and one of his T-shirt's and put them on. Lifting my cut from the floor I placed it over the back of the chair and then climbed into bed. I didn't want to feel like this especially not around him. I knew he would do anything to make it better, anything to make me smile again but I knew no matter how much I pushed to try and forget I always had this little voice telling me it happened, you live with it and you deal with it.