Chapter nine. adam
As the guys gently touch me and lead me to the door, he says, “Leave her. Forget it.”
I watch them walk around me and out the door. Their obedience has me curious.
Sunlight filters through the windows, seeping through the thinning clouds and resting on his face. Would it be silly to say that he sparkles in the sunlight? Or is my head caught up in fictional fantasies and not this real one? Either way, unearthly or not, he looks at me, waits for me to speak but nothing leaves my lips.
“You’re not allowed here, Wrenley,” he says. My stomach wobbles inside of me. How does he know my name? “How much did Vivian tell you? Do you know what is happening here?”
His voice makes me giddy. There is no way that he is also that scary, rude, stubborn, super-sized beast.
I murmur, “Why do I feel this way? I don’t... What are you?”
He stands from the desk he was leaning against. “This must be the one thing she’s left out. Tell me, what do you know, Wrenley?”
Every time he says my name my heart squeezes. It’s all too much. I watch as he drifts closer, trying to turn off the questionable thoughts in my head. A whiteboard is mounted behind me and I settle against it. I wonder if any teacher has ever written on it, or if this is all just a facade.
What do I know? “I know about your kind, a little. I know that there’s a pack in Waindale and that wolves who don’t belong to a pack are rogue. Vivian said an Alpha rules the pack. I-I don’t get it, though—why this concerns me.”
His eyes gaze down at me. “You’re aware of the scent, aren’t you? You told me that something inside of you wants me to be around, that your body feels different in my presence.”
“That was before,” I mutter, feeling my face heat up. “Just—why? What don’t I know? Doesn’t everyone feel that way?”
“No, Wrenley. Only you feel that way around me.”
I peer up at him. “Why?”
“Because we’re connected as you said.”
“Connected?” I repeat. “How are we connected? I don’t know you, not really.”
He stands in front of me and my blush intensifies. I’ve never been this type of girl. Guys don’t affect me this way. Back home I couldn’t care less about dating and flirting and chasing and all those ridiculous things. Why am I such a blushing idiot now? I have seen beautiful people before, I know they exist, but for some reason when it comes to him, I have no recollection of such things.
“Are you sure you want to know?” He asks seriously and not teasingly.
“Is it really that bad?”
“Some people think so.” He holds out his hand and tells me with his eyes to place mine on top. “Go on,” he says.
I lift my hand and steadily place it down on his bigger one. Instead of an electric shock, a bizarre, good feeling makes me pull back. It’s hard to admit that pleasure can come from such a small act. The sensation reminds me of when I felt his fur, only more severe.
I release a shaky breath. “Why did—”
“You’re my mate,” he says bluntly.
“Mate?”
“We’re mated. You and I have been bonded to one another.”
My lips part, no words come out except an unsure noise. “Why? What does it mean to be mated?”
“Every one of our kind is given a mate. A mate is, to put it lightly, like a life partner.”
“B-But I’m not one of you. I’m human.”
He nods. “I know. It’s an unusual situation.”
My mind runs a million miles per second, gluing everything together. “That’s why you were always there? That’s why Vivian and Imogen—that’s why they were supposed to look over me? I’ve been brought into all of this because you’ve mated with me?”
“I didn’t mate with you, Wrenley,” he says clearly. “This is just the way things are. I had no influence over it just as you had none.”
“Well, how do we fix it then? I suppose that’s what you want to do, right? How do we unmate each other?”
His dark eyes fall to the side for a moment. “It’s a complicated situation that you don’t fully understand.”
“We can’t unmate?”
“There are ways of wearing down the bond. There’s rejection, but—”
“But what?”
He steps back as his perfect face is overtaken by conflict. “This is why I needed you wait. I needed distance so I could decide what the best approach to this situation is.”
“Why can’t a decision be made now?”
“You’ve made it even more difficult than it was before.”
“I didn’t mean—”
His eyes find mine again and my chest tightens. “You aren’t doing it on purpose. You can’t help it.”
“Well, if you wanted distance then you shouldn’t have come to me.”
“All you are feeling is mutual. I couldn’t help but succumb to you.”
Hearing someone like him say such words has me flustered. I look to the floor and think about what to say next. These feelings of anxiety remind me of when I was younger. I would get butterflies in my stomach when talking to older people or those with authority. When I was twelve, I also felt this way around Gavin Castor who was a boy in the grade above me who I had an undeniable crush on. Such aches and struggles haven’t happened in so long that it’s bringing me back into the hurricane that is early adolescence.
“This is all a lot to take in,” I think out loud. “I wasn’t expecting something like this, I mean, I don’t know you and suddenly we’re bonded in some strange werewolf mate-thing. It doesn’t even make sense as to why we’re mates because, one, I’m human, and two, you’ re—you’re like you and I’m not like—” I gesture down his body.
He looks at me for a few seconds in silence. Even just a look causes a reaction in me. I’m fighting with my body, trying to gain control of my wants and needs because suddenly I can’t tell the difference between them anymore. Pushing off the wall, I move past him and stare at the ceiling for clarity.
“What do mates do?” I ask, throwing caution to the wind. “What’s the purpose of being bonded to someone without any say?”
Turning back, I’m met with his straight face.
He said all I’m feeling is mutual. Is he also wrestling with these terrible thoughts? I’m not sure where this is all coming from because confronting him in his other form had no such side effects. “You know what, forget it, I—”
“There’s a lot you’re unaware of, I understand. Maybe it’s best that Vivian answers your questions,” he says.
I feel like I’m just embarrassing myself. A part of me is determined to impress him, and every time I say the wrong thing, that part of me lashes back.
“What do we do now?”
He takes a breath. “I need some time. You can try to go back to the way things were, before all of this. Vivian and the rest of them will be around to help you in whatever way you need. I’ll find you when I’ve decided on the best way to handle things.”
I nod and say, “Okay.”
A second has past and it is already easier said than done. Returning to a mindset that existed before meeting him seems impossible.
“I should get home, anyway.” I look to the ground and head for the door, but before I pass through, I turn back one more time and say, “We’re mated but I don’t even know your name.”
He glances at me and my body tenses for the last time. His handsome eyes capture mine as he simply says, “Adam.”
My chest fills with air, and I force myself out the door. My arms wrap around my body and hold me as I hurry down the hall. I wish I never came here. I wish I never marched into this school like I knew what was going to happen because I had no clue. I was caught up in an unspoken infatuation and have only made it worse.
Adam. That’s who he is. I’m bonded to Adam and leaving him with this uncertainty of what’s to come makes my heart tremble.
I don’t want to leave. I want to stay with him—my deepest thoughts and desires want to stay forever.
I find Vivian the next day at school. Her face sparks like it always does. “I met him,” I say. “I met Adam.”
The spark fades quickly. Vivian leads me to a quiet place and doesn’t let go of my hand. Last night I thought about what I was going to say to her, but I can’t remember anymore. My head is focused on one thing right now.
“So you know then.”
“We’re mates. We’re bonded to one another.”
She urges me on. “And? What did he say? How was he?”
“I don’t know what’s going to happen.”
“Don’t worry about him becoming Alpha, Wrenley. I know it makes things complicated, and there’d be a lot of speculation about your relationship, but I truly believe that you two can make it work. Don’t you? I mean, I’m kinda assuming that things mostly went well, but—”
I blink once, twice. “He’s becoming an Alpha?”
Her grip on my hand tightens. “Yeah, of course. He said that, right?”
“No, he didn’t. He didn’t tell me.”
Not another word is spoken. Vivian and I sit in the stagnant silence as my mind goes into overdrive and as she tries to determine what I’m thinking about. The bell rings, but we stay still. Words are on the tip of my tongue, but they won’t come out.
Adam was right. It is more complicated than I thought.