Victor of Tucson

Chapter 8: Rage

Victor had to tiptoe when he returned to his cage with Ponda because he didn’t want some pissed-off pit fighter to toss shit at him for waking them up. He didn’t know if they’d actually do that, but Vullu had seemed serious about the risk, so he figured he wouldn’t take chances. He’d crept to his corner of the cage, curled up on some straw, and gone to sleep, listening to Yrella and Vullu breathing and the soft, deceptively soothing sounds of prisoners shifting around, snoring, and mumbling in their sleep.

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“A spirit Core, huh?” Yrella wore a frown and looked a little skeptical.

“Yeah, it was either that or some generic all-purpose Core, at least according to that Bogoli guy.”

“Any affinity?” Vullu asked.

“Yeah, um, rage.” Victor shrugged helplessly.

“That sounds portentous!” Yrella laughed.

“Portentous?” Victor wasn’t bad at English, but he’d definitely done more wrestling than reading the last few years.

“Let’s just say rage might not be a bad affinity for a pit fighter,” Vullu joined Yrella in her chuckling.

“Alright, alright, now that I have a Core, what do I do with these ninety-three Energy points?” They were sitting in the mess hall, waiting to be dismissed to practice.

“I can show you how to channel Energy into your strikes. It should help you a lot, and as you experiment and fight and gain levels, hopefully, you gain some skills or spells that utilize your particular brand of Energy.” Vullu said, mopping up the last of his eggs with a corner of his flatbread.

“Yeah, and tonight, we can try to help you figure out how to cultivate.” Yrella chimed in. Ponda’s bulk filled the doorway, and he hollered for everyone to get out of the mess hall, so the three of them hustled out to the exercise hall. They moved to their usual corner, but a large Ardeni man, that’s what the blue guys were called, if Victor recalled correctly, was occupying the space, twirling a large staff around.

“Zan, this is our space,” Vullu said flatly. Zan stopped swinging the staff around and looked at Vullu for a few seconds, visibly contemplating his response, but then he just shrugged and walked toward the center of the gym, as Victor had taken to calling the space. “Alright, kid, let’s practice with fists first.”

“Okay, what do I do?”

“Settle down; let me try to explain this. Hmm,” he tapped his furry chin as he spoke.

“He needs to be able to feel his Core and his Energy first,” Yrella said, resting a hand on Victor’s shoulder.

“I think I can feel it. When that guy was helping me form it, I kinda looked inside myself and could even see it.” As he spoke, Victor heard his words and blushed, realizing he sounded like some kind of new-age nutjob. contemporary romance

“Oh, that’s good, Victor! Your affinity must be pretty high - I couldn’t see my Core until I’d practiced meditation and found my center after quite a few days of practice.”

“Yes, good, Victor; can you see your Core now?” Vullu asked. Victor closed his eyes and felt the heat at the center of his body, turning his “eyes” inward toward it. There it was - a bright, pulsing, crimson star.

“Yeah, I see it.” His voice sounded far away from himself.

“Good, now, you know how you turned your vision into yourself? Now you have to imagine you have a presence there, that you can push and pull things around. Use your presence to pull some of the Energy from your Core into the channels around it. Let me know if you can do that.” Vullu’s voice also seemed far away, and Victor found himself more and more wrapped up in his study of his Core. Still, he heard what Vullu said, so he tried to imagine pulling on some of that red Energy, and as he did so, a strand of it broke away and illuminated the pathways near it. Victor smiled and pushed the strand into the nearest pathway.

“Okay, done it.”

“Good!” Vullu’s voice had a touch of excitement that Victor rarely heard from the dour goat-man. “Now, visualize that Energy traveling up the pathway toward your right fist. When you’ve got it, say so.” Once again, Victor followed Vullu’s directions, pushing that strand of Energy further into the pathway, guiding it along his stomach, up his chest, down his arm, and into his fist. All the way, it felt hot, pulsing with a heat that was more than temperature.

“Got it!” There was an edge to Victor’s voice like a snarl lurked beneath the surface.

“Now, open your eyes and punch the post!” Vullu said quickly. Victor opened his eyes, and it seemed like a very faint red haze obscured his vision. He glanced to his left, saw the wooden post, and punched it with his throbbing, itching right hand. He felt his body’s muscle memory as he stepped into the punch, twisted his hips, and drove his fist into the wooden post. A resounding crack rang out as a flash of red Energy splashed out of Victor’s fist. Unbidden, a savage grunt rose from Victor’s throat.

“First try! And he split the post!” Yrella cheered.

“Uh,” Victor’s voice was thick, and only his deepest vocal cords seemed to want to engage, “Goddamn, I feel like punching more shit!” He stood up straight, looked away from the post and his friends, and shook his head, taking several deep breaths.

“You alright, Victor?” Yrella started to reach a hand out to his shoulder, but Vullu grabbed her wrist.

“I think his rage affinity is extreme, Yrella. This will be something he needs to get used to slowly.”

“I’m alright, but yeah, I was feeling a little nuts for a second there. Like I wanted to fight, and it didn’t matter who.”

“Sorry, Victor; I don’t know much about spirit Cores. We had one woman in my hometown with one, but she had a love affinity. She was well sought after for her services….” Vullu trailed off, then continued, “The point is, I have no idea how those sorts of affinities work.”

“The good news is you smashed that post!” Yrella said, clapping Victor’s shoulder. “I think you just need to keep practicing, as Vullu said. When you feel normal, throw another punch; hopefully, it’ll get easier to control.”

“Right, let’s do some grappling in between. What do you guys say?” Victor asked, dropping to the sawdust to stretch. They agreed, and their hours of practice were spent alternating between grappling, with Victor helping them get better at takedowns, and Victor channeling rage-attuned Energy into his fist and punching something. Each time, he felt the emotion rising in him, but never enough to entirely lose control. Victor knew if he channeled more than one rage-fuelled strike, he’d run the risk of losing himself in it. He hoped it got easier to control; otherwise, he didn’t know how useful it would be.

That afternoon, Victor got to join in the ‘cultivating’ that all the other prisoners did. Yrella took the lead in trying to explain it to him, “First, you need to understand that Energy is everywhere. It wasn’t always so dense around our world, but when the System and the great oceans of Energy came to our part of the universe, it became a very tangible, important part of life.” She paused to look into Victor’s eyes to see if he was following her.

“Yeah, okay.”

“Well, so the next thing you need to know is that the Energy in your Core is probably different from the Energy around us. Energy can have lots of different affinities. Some of the most common ones that you’ll run into are elemental affinities - some Energy is attuned to fire, wind, or other elements. Other, less common affinities might be something like death or life or pestilence. I'm sure there are more than I know of and more than I can list. Like your affinity, for instance, I hadn’t heard of a rage affinity before, though I knew things like that existed.”

“Okay, everything you said makes sense, I guess, but I’m not sure how people end up with affinities.” He gestured at himself to make his point.

“People who claim to understand that are probably lying,” Vullu said from his corner of the cage.

“Right, let’s focus on what we know: because of the different Cores and affinities, it’s very common for people to cultivate Energy differently. These cultivation methods are often called ‘drills’ because it’s a routine you repeatedly follow, slowly building your Core and thus your strength with Energy. You can even gain levels through cultivating if you’re good at it and do it enough.”

“So, you guys don’t know how I’m supposed to cultivate, do you?” Victor could see where this was going.

“No, not exactly. We can describe our process, though, and maybe you can figure things out. Over time, you’ll hopefully perfect your method, or maybe you can buy a cultivation manual for your type of Core down the road.” Yrella smiled, giving him a chagrined shrug. “I’ll do my best.” Victor smiled back at her. She might be older and think of him as a kid, but she was fine as hell, and when she smiled like that, he was just grateful Yund put him in this cage when he’d first arrived.

“Hey, I appreciate any help you guys can give me.”

“Alright, so sit like I am, with your legs crossed and your palms open on your knees. Most people have Energy pathways open to the world on their palms. I’m pretty sure you do, judging by how your Energy-infused punch worked.” Victor did as she said, feeling kinda silly sitting there like he was going to do yoga or something, but Yrella nodded, reassuring him, and he settled into the pose. “Now, turn your mind inward, and look at your Core.” She waited a moment and then continued, “When I cultivate, I move some of my Energy from my Core into my pathways and let it cycle through, all the way to my hands, and then back toward my Core. As I send it back to my Core, I try to pull some of the Energy out of the world with it, adding to my Core a tiny bit with each cycle.”

“Huh, let me see….” Victor trailed off as he tried to do what Yrella described. He had no problem pushing a strand of his Energy into his pathway and then nudging it out along his pathways. It circled through a winding path around his abdomen, then out toward his left hand, and when he felt the burning, furious Energy bubbling up around his palm, he pushed it back toward his Core. Almost too late, he realized the thin strand of Energy he’d pulled from his Core had become a thick, surging river. He could feel it and see it with his inner eye, like a roiling red torrent that struggled to push out into the world, but he grit his teeth and growled, pushing his will against the flood and forcing it around into a return pathway toward his Core. He tried to do what Yrella said and pull some Energy out of the air with it, but he wasn’t sure he got any because his own Energy was so bright, hot, and full of roiling emotion that whatever Energy might be in the air around him seemed to pale into non-existence.

“Are you alright, Victor?” Yrella’s voice sounded small, distant, and irritating, and Victor growled again, bearing down on the Energy flowing through his pathways, pushing it back toward his Core. It bucked and surged, trying to turn down other routes to find an outlet, but he fought it, sweat breaking out on his forehead and soaking his filthy green t-shirt. While he struggled, thoughts came floating out of the back of his mind into his consciousness, making him look at memories that he’d rather stay buried. He remembered his cousin on his Mom’s side texting him after his parents had died, “Why don’t you come to grandma’s house anymore?” He remembered asking to visit them and having his auntie tell him that his mom’s family didn’t want to see him anymore. Victor growled, clenching his fist and pushing against the surge of Energy. The flood of Energy had made a complete circuit now and was starting to return to his Core. Annoying little memories started to pile forth; he remembered when he’d asked Paul to let him use his deodorant, reaching into his locker to grab it before he answered, and how Paul had slammed his locker on Victor’s hand. He remembered the fight that ensued and growled savagely.

He felt a hand on his shoulder, and he opened red, bloodshot eyes and bared his teeth at Yrella, who had moved to kneel in front of him. “Victor! Push the Energy back to your Core! Don’t cycle anymore.” With a monumental effort, Victor closed his eyes, burying the murderous thoughts that had come out of nowhere. He turned his mind to his Energy and continued to push and bully it back into his Core. Finally, he felt the red, angry heat start to fade from his flesh, and he breathed deeply, burying all the infuriating memories back into the depths of his mind, so he could open his eyes without hate glowing balefully forth from them.

“Sorry,” he said in a throaty voice and wiped his face, hoping the tears that had pooled in his bloodshot eyes would blend with the sweat that soaked him.

“Don’t apologize, Victor,” Vullu said from his corner. “You did a good job containing that surge. I think you’ll need a lot of practice, and we need to learn more about spirit Cores. Your Energy might not be cultivated the same as mine and Yrella’s.”

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