Vantablack

Its two weeks before the winter solstice and I'm tired.

Not only has the Alpha been using me as a way to break his mate for the past two months but my wolf keeps mumbling things that I can't hear and she keeps having mood swings.

On top of that my body hurts and aches everywhere especially my back and breast. I've been throwing up for the past two weeks and I feel like crying all the time.

I don't know why I feel like this but I hoped it meant that my period is close. For some reason I skipped last month but I brushed it off, it's suppose to come tomorrow...I hope it does.

I start to dry the dishes when the Beta pushes me against the counter, "why the hell do you smell so good?"

He put his nose against my neck and inhaled, "you've never smelled so good before."

I stayed still and don't say anything.

But I couldn't help but think, what the hell is he talking about?

Beta keeps sniffing me before he decides to take advantage of the position I'm in and buries himself in me.

Once he's done, he leaves and I puke into the sink.

The puke comes out clear since the only thing I've had for the past two days is water then I dry heave for a few minutes before I clean up my mess.

As soon as I finish the alpha comes in and drags me to his office.

I start feeling dizzy and unbalanced.

I try not to stumble as he drags me but still tripped only to be dragged across the floor.

Alpha drags me pass a tied up Luna and bends me over his desk before taking me again.

I don't look at the Luna I turn my head towards the books and start counting. But after a while of the back and forth motion I feel bail coming up my throat and the dizziness turns into black dots. I blink and turn towards the Luna to hopeful stop the dizziness but I start to see three of her and I knew there was no way to stop me from blacking out. Which triggered a panic attack, my heart beat racing a mile a minute and I can't breathe and start to sweat. I can't hear anything around me except for my head pounding.

I'm suddenly turned around and the alpha is in my face saying something but I couldn't hear. I shake my head and the alpha's fist hits my face making me black out completely.

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There's a dull beeping in the background and wish it would go away.

I quickly sit up when I realized that its right next to me.

Looking around the room, I see nothing but white and a bunch of machines making noise.

I don't know why I'm here but I can't ask questions. If they want me to know then they will tell me but right now I have to get out of this room.

Most of the machines were connected to me so I started to take them out when the pack doctor walks in.

"You shouldn't do that my dear"

I stop pulling out the machines and stared at the man.

Maybe he'll tell me what happened. As if he can read my mind, "you had a panic attack while the alpha was fucking you and then passed out as he ordered you to leave the room"

My heartbeat picked up it pace

Oh no, he's going to kill me

I must've turned pale because the doctor said, "Calm down Rose, the alpha won't kill you"

I look at him skeptically but try to slow my heartbeat. The doctor goes and sits in his chair before he rolls over to me.

I was so fascinated by the chair that I didn't realize he was so close until he puts something against my stomach.

I jumped and was about to move but he grabbed my waist and held me still. After a minute or two he nods his head and smiles at me, "the baby seems to be just fine but just to be on the safe side I want you to take......"

He gets up and starts to grab things but I think one word he said, baby

I'm pregnant

This can't be happening

My wolf speaks to me, the doctor is telling the truth

We're pregnant?

Yes

I'm sixteen and pregnant

What am I going to do?

The doctor touches my arm and I jerk away from him. I place my arms against my stomach and growl weakly.

The doctor whispers softly, "Rose, did you know that you were pregnant before today?"

I shake my head and the doctor sighs, "Rose you've been in a coma for thirteen days, you're 3 months pregnant, and I'm pretty sure that the alpha is the father"

My heart drops to my feet then it crawls away when the Alpha slams the door open.

He glares at the doctor then turns to me and I see the disgust in his eyes, "Leave us doctor"

The doctor nods with a smile on his face. I don't think he realizes that by leaving he just helped the alpha kill me.

The alpha glared at me but he didn't move.

He glared at me for ten minutes before he starts to give me a sick smile, "the law says that no one is to kill the woman pregnant with an alpha's child."

He walks to me and I pull my legs up so they can cover my stomach. I feel dread and fear build with every step he takes, he plans to do something sick and I don't know what.

The Alpha stands beside me and stares at me before he pulls out some rope.

He ties my arms up using his speed against me then pulls my legs down before sitting on them.

I try to buck him off me but I just end up wasting my own energy and in near tears.

When I stop he puts his hands on my stomach and leans towards my ear to whisper, "The law never said we couldn't make the woman miscarry."

I tried kicking my legs so I can hit him somewhere but he's sitting where I can't hit him.

He puts his hands on my stomach and starts pushing.

So I screamed.

I screamed for somebody to come and help me

I screamed like I was dying, to protect my unborn child

I hear a growl but keep screaming as the pain got worse.

I can't lose my baby

I can't lose the one thing that will give me a reason to live

I screamed and screamed but no one came.

I didn't stop until I felt blood on the bed.

The alpha smiles when he smells the blood and gets off of me.

Then he walks to the door leaving me tied up before turning back to me, "I can't have my first born by a weakling. No my first born will be with my mate, that way he will be strong. He will be the one to take over my pack and the Night pack when its time. Anyways, hope you get better Rose"

He laughs as he walks out the door. Leaving it open for the doctor who looks horrified and the Luna has a blank expression on her face.

The both of them walk in and close the door when the other pack members try to peek inside.

"Rose" the doctor says sadly

I turn my head away from him and feel something wet go down my face.

Once I realize I'm crying, I start to sob and it got worse when someone untied me.

I only knew about my child for five minutes and then he/she is taken away from me because I couldn't protect them.

I'm a horrible mother

I'm used

I'm broken

And I have nothing to really keep me alive but now whatever is left of my soul is gone. Shattered

I feel completely dead on the inside...no I am dead.

The doctor does what he needs to make sure that the baby is actually gone and that I will heal physically.

The Luna still says nothing to me.

I wish she'll just leave already and let me drown in my own misery and self hate.

The door opens and closes after the doctor moves away from my body. Turning around I see that the doctor left and the Luna stayed.

Probably to beat on us like her mate. My wolf says bitterly

I sighed softly, or most likely to mock us

The Luna frowned as if she can hear us then sighs.

"I'm sorry"

I turned my back to her, not caring about the blunt disrespect or the headache that was building, but I waited as my soul becomes as dark as my reality.

I don't know what it was that kept me going for so long but I know that the reason is gone, completely and there's nothing taking its place.

Staring at the white wall I wait for the door to open and close but it doesn't happen instead the Luna grabs my shoulders and turns me to her with a pissed off look.

I look at her blankly and wait for the hit coming my way.

The Luna lets go and takes a deep breath, "Tomorrow is the winter solstice which is also having an eclipse that very same day. I and Alpha Adam will be going to an alpha meeting that only happens once every ten years. If you want to live and not be the pack's number one whore then leave as soon as the solstice happens."

I don't say anything and this pisses her off even more, "If you don't leave then I will kill you myself."

She storms out the room and slams the door.

I turn back to the wall and think about what she said.

If I leave I won't know what will happen.

The pack and my 'duties' are the only things I actually known.

I could be walking into a trap set up by the Luna.

But what if she's right? What if we get freedom? What if we find our mate? My wolf, Smoke, whines slightly.

What man is going to want a woman that everyman has been in?

Mika says determined, a man that will listen and understand. A man that will care. One who is willing to wait and put us first. One that will never hurt us and will be there no matter what. Just as we will for him.

I shake my head at the hope in her voice.

I know that it's the last bit of hope she has and I don't want to crush it.

So this leads to the main question of the night:

Should I stay to be a murder's plaything or do I leave and go into the unknown?