(Un)wise

A week later we reached Georgia. We’d driven through a wicked storm and ended up a little further south than where we wanted to be. With Gabby’s watchful eye, we’d avoided detection, though we’d experienced a few close calls. We’d woken one morning to a knock on our door and a quick “pack up.” We’d left that hotel minutes before the Urbat reached town. They were only scouting Gabby assured us, but no one wanted to take the chance. She said their net was still spread wide. They were still trying to find us.

They had managed to catch a lone werewolf the fourth day after our departure from the Compound. The Elders immediately reached out to the man and remained mute for several hours. I shivered watching their faces and imagined the poor werewolf begging for information to give his captors as they tortured him.

Luke wrapped his arm around my shoulders and whispered words I couldn’t remember afterward. He understood that I relived my own tortured pasts while the man remained in the Urbat’s hands. When the Elders started speaking again, I knew his torture was over. I struggled to pull myself out of my dark memories. Luke was my anchor. He held my hand through it all, worry etched on his face.

He continued to fuss over what I ate, too. Under his care, I put on a few needed pounds and finally got more than two consecutive nights of good sleep. He started sleeping with a bag of chips next to the bed until I woke with crumbs in my hair and put a stop to his snacking.

We trudged into the lobby of yet another hotel, dripping and tired of being on the road. I was beginning to wonder if anywhere would ever feel like home again. Nana came up to me and pulled me away from Luke.

“I’d like to take out the stitches today. It was a shallow enough cut that it should be fine, but you’ll need to take it easy.”

I eagerly agreed. They were itching like crazy and uncomfortable. Once we had our rooms, she knocked on our door. Luke held my hand as she cut the first loop. It didn’t hurt. Then, she tugged. I suffered a sharp sting on the surface as the stitch broke free from the healing skin. My stomach turned over at the queer feeling of something sliding under my skin.

“That was the easy one,” Nana said. “A small one I did as a test to make sure you’d sleep through it. The next few are longer running stitches.”

I didn’t like the sound of that. More tugging, a little bleeding, and a lot of that under the skin crawling occurred over the next few minutes, but then she was done. I looked down at my stomach unimpressed with the new decoration on my skin. I sighed and moved to tug my shirt down.

“Not yet,” she said, reaching down for a bottle. “It needs to be cleaned again.” She passed the small bottle of rubbing alcohol to Luke. “I think you can take it from here.”

I did not want the alcohol on all the new holes in my skin. Most of them bled like little pinpricks. Luke watched me with a smile when I slowly tugged my shirt down.

“You heard her,” he said. “Let’s do this quick, and then we can grab dinner.”

“I’m too sick for dinner. Let’s skip it,” I said, referring to the cleaning.

“Bethi, you’re tougher than this,” Luke said.

His gentle words made me feel like a coward. So, I made a face at him and exposed the cut. “Go on, you sadist. Inflict some more pain on your poor little human.” I closed my eyes waiting for the pain, but felt nothing. Then, something brushed my forehead. A soft kiss. I smiled. He did that when he wanted to comfort me. It always worked.

A light touch of something cold on my almost healed cut elicited a gasp from me. Immediately, the antiseptic sting followed. He methodically touched each spot. I knew he had finished when he placed another kiss on my forehead.

Opening my eyes, I caught his tender look as he apologized. “I’m sorry I hurt you.”

I gave a little laugh. “You didn’t hurt me. I did. I’m good at that.”

He helped me sit up. “But not anymore. Never again.” He placed gentle fingers under my chin, forcing me to meet his gaze until I nodded.

Satisfied, he moved away from the bed and cleaned up the tissues he’d used. I stood slowly, testing my capabilities. It felt weird. It was probably in my head, but I worried the wound would pop right back open. So, though I stood straight, my movements were slow and easy like Nana had recommended.

“Since we’re eating at the hotel’s restaurant, it might be better if you leave that here,” he commented nodding toward the knife strapped to my thigh.

After leaving the Compound, I’d taken to wearing my knife strapped to my leg. Nana had loaned me a cute peacoat to replace Luke’s shredded jacket. The new coat covered the knife whenever we stopped.

Sighing, I bent and released the clasp. I handed the bundle to Luke and watched him tuck it into our bag. When he joined me at the door, he placed another gentle kiss on my forehead. “We’ll all be there,” he murmured. “You won’t need it.”

I gave the bag a long wistful glance and left with Luke.

Down in the lobby, the others waited. The boys were being entertained by Grey and Jim doing “up-downs.” The term wasn’t something I associated with what they did. Each boy held the thumbs of one of the men. The men closed their hands over the boys’ wrists and then started lifting and lowering them. It caused fits of giggles, but I didn’t see how it could be much fun. To me, it looked like their arms would get sore. The boys’, not the werewolves’. I knew the werewolves could lift like that forever.

“All set?” Nana asked.

I wrinkled my nose. “Yes. He got each one.”

She smiled. “We’ll get you a dessert for putting up with that.”

Aden immediately begged to be let down and scampered over to my side. “Can I sit by you?” he asked sweetly. I’d watched how Jim often stole food from Aden’s plate, and Aden in turn robbed whomever else sat closest to him. No doubt, he wanted my dessert. Still, I agreed.

The wait staff had already prepared a table for our large party and sat us as soon as we entered the hotel’s dining room. Luke sat on one side of me with Aden on the other. Michelle sat on Aden’s other side, close to Emmitt. Jim was quick to sit across from Aden. Liam was on his other side.

Gabby claimed the spot directly across from me. Since driving together, she often took every opportunity to talk to me about her gift, trying to figure out all of its possibilities. We even found a moment free of our men where she’d offered to pass her gift to me. I’d been so tempted but knew we couldn’t risk her losing her ability to see the sparks and guide our route. So, I’d regretfully declined the offer.

Talk around the table rose as everyone tried to decide what to order. It was nice not having to worry about money. Michelle’s lawyer contact helped her get the funds we needed throughout our journey. No one made a fuss about using it, so I didn’t either. I had enough to worry about. Besides, that’s what she was meant to do.

While eyeing the baked lasagna on the menu, Gabby nudged me under the table. I looked up to see her unfocused gaze. “One of them just changed direction,” she mouthed. Both Luke and Clay caught it, but no one else paid it any attention. “Maybe the rain?” she whispered hopefully, her eyes focusing again on the menu. She didn’t look up again, but I could tell she monitored the progress of whoever had caught her attention. We ordered, and most of the adults conversed or entertained the children. I kept a close eye on Gabby.

She reached for Clay’s hand. He wrapped both of his around hers and tilted his head. That finally caught the attention of Grey.

“What is it?” he asked softly, looking between Clay and Gabby. The table grew quiet, even the boys. Michelle hugged Aden to her side. Jim placed a gentle hand on top Liam’s head.

“Someone’s changed their direction,” I said.

“A complete turn,” Gabby added.

“With all this rain, we should be fine,” Sam assured the suddenly tense group. But we knew all it took was one of them to catch the scent and send word.

“Have any others changed?” Nana asked.

“I thought the rest looked like the same inconsistencies they’ve been doing since the beginning. Remember how I said it looked like a net? Several have changed directions moving toward a central point,” she frowned. “They are doing that in six areas. We seem to be in the middle of one. The areas are huge though, several states. Big nets to catch little fish.”

“Do we need to move?” Grey’s eyes lacked their usual humor.

Gabby shook her head slowly. “I’m not as worried about their nets as much as I am the one closest to us. About a mile now.”

The Elders shared a look. The waitress came to ask if we needed any refills. Jim asked for a double whiskey and two kiddie cocktails. Aden gave Jim a cautious smile.

“That’s close, but with the rain, we don’t think they could track us even if they were right outside the door,” Nana said. Thunder boomed to punctuate her point. “Gabby, keep us updated. Sam, grab everyone’s room keys and gather our things in my room. If they reach the parking lot, we’ll all go there.”

Sam stood and left. The waitress delivered the whiskey and kids’ sodas. Jim pushed the sodas to the boys and the whiskey to Michelle. It was then I saw her pale face and worried looks at the boys.

“Nana,” she said. “Call Mary and Gregory. You’re right. It’s safer.”

Nana nodded sadly. I’d wondered when she would send them away and thought her foolish for keeping them with us this long. But I did understand. How could you let go of someone you loved so much?

Michelle took a small sip, and Emmitt commented, “I guess I’m losing another shirt.” It did the trick. Some color came back into her cheeks.

She leaned over and kissed the top of Aden’s head and asked if they could play tic-tac-toe together. He eagerly turned over his placemat.

I could see the exact moment we were out of danger. Gabby took a deep calming breath and removed her hand from Clay’s. “He’s close, but stopped moving,” Gabby said.

“Probably holing up out of the rain,” Clay said. That man’s voice did serious things to a girl’s insides. Gabby caught my stare and grinned at me knowingly.

“If he clears out before check out tomorrow morning, we’ll see if we can book the rooms for another night. It will give Mary and Gregory enough time to reach us,” Nana spoke directly to Emmitt. Michelle continued to play with Aden but took another sip of whiskey at the news.

A few minutes later Sam rejoined us just in time for our food. I dug into my meal and looked forward to staying there another day.

Stuffed from dinner even with Aden’s help with dessert, I willingly followed everyone back to Nana’s room where we all grabbed our things. The Elders agreed it would be best if they spread themselves throughout the rooms in case we needed a quick warning to leave. Grey and Carlos roomed with us, Sam stayed with Gabby and Clay, and Nana with Charlene and Thomas since their room adjoined to Michelle and Emmitt’s.

Feeling awkward, I closed myself in the bathroom to get ready for bed. I washed my face, brushed my teeth, then stared at my bag. If we needed to leave in the middle of the night, I wasn’t about to run out into the storm wearing sleep pants. I grabbed some clean clothes and changed. When I emerged, I saw the rest had the same idea—except for Luke. When he saw me, he smiled, pulled off his shirt, and lay back with an arm across my pillow. An open invitation to my favorite spot to sleep.

I crawled into bed and gave in to a dreamless night.

The morning brought better news. Grey greeted me with a smile saying, “We’re here for another day.” Then he made the news sweeter saying, “Carlos and I are going back into our own room. It’s a good thing you’re a solid sleeper because he snores.” He looked at Luke who grinned and seemed undisturbed by the news.

We went to breakfast and listened to everyone else’s plans for the day. Michelle wanted to take the kids to a movie —early showing of course—and Nana wanted to shop for some snacks to pack in the cars for everyone. Grey claimed Carlos just wanted to watch cable all day. Carlos’ only reaction to that was a long look at Grey. I had a feeling it was Grey who wanted to watch cable all day. Gabby said she had schoolwork she wanted to focus on for a few hours. I envied her belief that life would continue as normal once we found Peace. I wasn’t about to tell her otherwise.

Sam looked at Luke and me. “What about you two?”

“Nothing that involves driving,” I said.

Sam smiled. “Well, Grey will be here if you need anything,” he said, looking first at Gabby then at me. “I think I’m going to tag along with Winifred.”

Luke and I ended up walking with Emmitt and his family to the movie theater. The kids picked out a new cartoon for everyone to see. Luke and I got our own popcorn to share. It felt weird going to a movie, but Gabby had assured us there was no one close. And there wasn’t anything else to do but wait until Mary and Gregory came for the kids.

So, I sat back and enjoyed the show, laughing—really laughing—for the first time since the dreams had started. Luke surprised me by cupping my chin and pulling my attention from the screen. Before I knew what he intended, his lips met mine in a kiss so mind-numbing and brief that I blinked at the screen for several minutes afterward. When I looked back at him, he watched the screen with a tiny image of the movie reflected in his eyes.

Not knowing what to think of the unexpected kiss, I went back to enjoying the movie, as I threaded my fingers through his. Every once in a while his thumb would smooth over the back of my hand.

After the show, we all walked back to the hotel. Everyone else was going to lunch, but the popcorn from the theater ruined my appetite, and I felt the tug of a dream. So, Luke and I walked back to our room.

Instead of giving into the dream, I decided to take a shower and warned Luke it would be a warm one just in case he thought I was taking too long. I hadn’t enjoyed the last time I fell asleep in a hotel bathtub.

Stripped down and letting the water run, I looked at myself in the mirror. I still desperately wanted to Claim Luke and wished I was brave enough to walk out there just as I was to try to tempt him. But I wasn’t. The scars on my arms bothered me. They were from a desperate time in my life that I really didn’t want to think about. The one on my stomach was just stupid. What really bothered me was my weight. I’d gained a little but not enough to look appealing, in my mind. Every time I pictured myself bare in Luke’s presence, a scene from Les Misérables—the old one, not the new—interposed itself. It was the part where Uma Thurman pulled back the covers to offer herself as payment to her landlord. Thin and sickly, she’d disgusted him. That was what I envisioned. A grand gesture and an epic failure that would leave me crushed.

Covering myself with my arms, I ducked under the spray ready to wash away all my ugliness. It didn’t work.

When I stepped out of the shower, I was the same scarred, thin me. I looked around for my bag and started to panic. I hadn’t brought it in with me. Was this a self-fulfilling prophecy? I sat on the toilet on the verge of tears with a dream tapping its sharp fingers on my skull.

Why did life have to be so hard?

A knock on the door startled me.

“You all right?” Luke asked from the other side.

I quickly stood and rubbed my yet unshed tears away. “Yeah. I just forgot my bag.”

“I’ll get it.” His voice sounded fainter, and I knew he had already walked away from the door.

Making a quick I-don’t-want-to-do-this face, I turned the knob and opened it a few inches to look out. He had his back to me, picking up the bag from one of the beds. When he turned and saw me, he stopped. Shame burned me as I gave him an uncertain smile, closed the door a bit further, and held out a hand, palm up. Only after I did it, did I realize I’d exposed my wrist. My eyes flew to his again. He hadn’t moved.

I curled up, died, and was reborn in the fires of my anguish. Yanking the door open, I marched right up to him and pried the bag from his dead fingers.

“Just so you know, I had a boyfriend. Before the dreams started, and I went crazy,” I said defensively. “It was pretty serious.”

Finally, emotion broke through his shocked expression.

“But I cut ties when I realized what was coming my way. You know I’m old enough in the human world…and I know that by werewolf standards I’m old enough. When you’re ready, you let me know,” I said boldly, turning away from him.

He stopped me, curling his fingers loosely around my upper arms. The same arms that had a death hold on the towel and my remaining dignity.

“What are you saying?” he asked, his voice laced with a hint of a growl.

I dropped the bag and stepped toward him. “You didn’t think a girl willing to cut herself, take drugs, run away from home, and hitch rides from strangers would save herself, did you?”

“Joshua?” he growled.

Giving a small laugh, I touched his jaw, tracing the ridge of it with a fingertip. “No way. He smelled like mud.” Then his reaction hit me like a lightning bolt. His tense jaw, his overly focused concentration on my face…nowhere else but my face. He wanted to see more. My heart started beating faster, and the angry shame shrank back. Hopeful, I stood on my tiptoes.

“You smell like home,” I whispered, brushing my lips against his.

He stood still, keeping his arms at his sides as I reached up and threaded my fingers in his hair. My lips traced his. Tiny tremors shook him. Then, he broke. His arms came alive and gently circled around me. He tilted his head and pressed his lips against mine. Tingles chased up and down my back. His mouth opened slightly as he planted little kisses in a trail down my neck. He nipped the tender skin there before continuing down to my collarbone.

“Tell me this is a yes,” I whispered, struggling to keep my focus.

He groaned, but didn’t stop. His mouth wandered back up my throat so I had to tilt my head back. He kissed his way to my lips, but before he claimed them, he pulled back to meet my eyes.

“This is a yes.” He tilted his head exposing his throat.

I reached up to hold his shoulders and pull him down a bit. The towel fell to the floor. His breathing came in quick pants, matching mine. I kissed him gently, rubbing my lips on the corded muscles of his neck. Then, I bit.

He groaned and held me to him. A surge of love flooded me along with a consuming need to possess. They weren’t my feelings. Not all of them, anyway. I moved on, kissing my way up his neck to his jaw. When he pulled back, a bloody smudge remained where I’d bit him, nothing else.

His lips claimed mine in a bruising kiss, and he turned us, backing me toward the bed. My heart started beating so fast I thought it would burst from my chest.

When we reached the bed, he stopped and pulled his shirt off. I knew then that we wouldn’t stop at just Claiming. Anticipation flooded me. This time it was all my emotion. I smiled shyly at him and wrapped my arms around his neck.

Snuggled against his side, I traced my fingers through the hair on his chest, content and peaceful. No dreams tugged at me. I hadn’t looked at him yet. I wasn’t sure if he would regret what we’d done.

“You lied,” he said quietly, turning to kiss the top of my head.

“The last lie I’ll be able to get away with now. Well, with you anyway.” I didn’t need to ask if he was mad at me. I knew he wasn’t. I could feel his contentment blending with mine.

“Was there even a boyfriend?” he asked softly.

“Not a serious one,” I admitted. “Still wish we would have waited for the magic eighteen?” I had to know.

He turned on his side to face me, his expression tender. “Yes,” he said simply. “You are worth waiting for.” His love flooded me, but I felt no regret. I leaned forward to kiss him.

“You’re worth waiting for, too,” I said softly. “But I didn’t want to risk dying without feeling this.” The connection between us grew, bursting with love and life. It wasn’t just the impressions I had felt with Joshua. It was so much more. There was no room for self-doubt. With Luke, I could endure anything. Be anything. Even a Judgement.

My stomach rumbled, and a thread of concern flowed through our link.

“Let’s get dressed and eat,” he said. The concern kept growing.

“What’s wrong?” The depth of what he felt washed through me.

“You never eat right.” He rose from the bed.

I forgot to breathe. I’d seen him in the all-n-all before, but now he was mine. I just wanted to jump on his back and pull him back under the covers with me. I wanted his touch. Needed it. I blinked as I struggled with my feelings and realized with a smile, they weren’t just mine, because concern still flavored them.

“If you don’t stop, we’ll never feed you,” he said with a smile as he strode to the bathroom.

We met everyone downstairs for dinner. Nana glanced away from her conversation with Charlene to look at us, then did a double take. Her sudden wide smile told me she knew.

“About time he pulled his head from his—” Grey started to mutter, but a nudge from Carlos cut him off.

Four new members had joined our group. Michelle’s brothers clung to two faces I recognized. Paul and Henry. They spoke to Gabby with a long time familiarity as they entertained the boys. Michelle and Emmitt spoke off to the side with Gregory and Mary. Michelle’s eyes were red from barely restrained tears.

When Paul looked up and saw me hand in hand with Luke, he smiled and nudged his brother. Heat rushed to my face.

Dinner moved slowly, just the way we needed it to. Michelle agreed to let the boys go on a long holiday with Gregory and Mary. Or as the boys thought of it, with Paul and Henry. We spent the time talking about nothing important, though I caught Gabby’s unfocused gaze as she constantly monitored the Urbat progress.

After dinner, we all agreed to meet in the lobby early the following morning. The next day’s travel would bring us to Peace.

I went to bed eagerly and looked forward to another good night’s sleep. But I didn’t get what I wanted.

“Daughter,” she said, standing beside the bed dressed in her usual taupe gown. “You are so blessed to have finally Claimed a Mate worthy of you.”

I stood at the end of the bed, looking at Luke on his side, curled around me, his arm resting over my waist. I looked so small compared to him.

I glanced at the Taupe Lady. “I thought I only dreamt of the past.”

She smiled. “This is the past. Just minutes old.”

“Why am I dreaming this?”

“I’m bound to the past as much as I’m bound to the present, floating in the shadows in between. This is the only place we may speak. You must hurry to find your sisters. His anger is growing and even she won’t be safe much longer. Tread carefully, loved one.”

She smiled and reached out to pat Luke’s bare arm. He shifted in his sleep. Then, she leaned over him to place a kiss on my sleeping-self’s cheek.

I bolted upright, eyes wide, the feeling of her lips lingering on my skin. The place beside the bed was empty, but I couldn’t shake the creeped out feeling.

“What is it?” Luke asked, instantly awake and sitting up with me.

I turned worried eyes to him. “I don’t think I’m done dreaming, yet.”

He kissed me gently, coaxed me back under the covers, and encouraged me to lay my head on his chest. He ran his fingers through my hair and rubbed my back until I relaxed again. Still, I lay awake long after he started snoring.

She was worried about Courage, I was sure of it. If she lived in the past and the present, she had to know what we planned and where we were headed. I bit my lip thinking of what Courage might be enduring despite Michelle’s vision of gentle treatment.

Luke inhaled long and loud just then, his fingers twitching in my hair. I smiled at the sound before closing my eyes again. We would never need to share a room with anyone else with the noise he made.