Until You (Off-Limits)

I’m surprised when I walk out of my office to find that Aria is already gone. We usually go home together, and I was looking forward to getting her alone again.

I check my phone but I have no missed calls from her. Usually if she has to run an errand of some sort, she’ll let me know. I sent her a text on my way out, double-checking that she really has left, but she doesn’t reply.

Somehow, I’m feeling uneasy on the way home. I feel like something is wrong, but I can’t quite figure out what it is. I’m surprised when I walk into the house and find it pitch dark. Aria dislikes being home alone, and she usually turns on the hallway lights as soon as she gets in. I expected to find her in the kitchen, a smile on her face and that cute apron of hers tied around her.

Instead, I find the house empty. I walk around, trying my best to calm my raging heart. I haven’t felt this way since I was a little boy. This type of fear, this helplessness… It feels foreign to me, yet familiar all at once.

I walk to Aria’s bedroom, hesitating before I open the door. Relief rushes through me when I find her standing in front of her bed, and it doesn’t even register that she’s got her suitcase out, not until she turns to glare at me, tears in her eyes.

She looks away and starts packing. I walk up to her and she takes a step away, making me freeze.

“What’s going on?” I ask, worried. I take another step toward her, wanting to take her into my arms and wipe those tears away, but she won’t let me. She places her palms against my chest and pushes me away, though she barely manages to move me.

“Babe, you’re worrying me,” I tell her, my every instinct begging me to wrap my arms around her, to take away the sorrow in her eyes.

“Don’t,” she says, her voice trembling.

“Don’t what?” I ask, my heart constricting painfully. I feel like I’m losing her and I can’t figure out what I did wrong.

“Why?” she asks me. “Why did you lead me on? Why would you tell me I’m the only one for you when I’m not? I don’t get it… am I just someone to pass the time with?”

Her voice breaks and she swallows down her sobs, trying her hardest to stop crying. She sniffs, her entire body shaking, and it kills me to see her this way. “Aria, I don’t know what you’re talking about. You are the only one for me, baby. Of course you are.”

She starts to sob and drops her forehead to my chest. “Then why? Why are you cheating on me? Emotional cheating is still cheating, Gray. After everything you saw me go through… Why? Why would you put me back together only to break me like this?”

I grab her shoulders and look into her eyes, the puzzle pieces finally falling into place. I should have known.

I cup her cheeks and wipe her tears away with my thumbs. “Baby, I would never cheat on you. That would never ever happen.”

Aria starts to cry even harder, and I wrap my arms around her, hugging her tightly. I lift her up and sit down on her bed with her on my lap. She pushes against me weakly, as though she thinks she should resist my embrace, but can’t.

“I assume this is about Nyx?” I say carefully. “When you told me you’d take me up on my offers to make you scream my name, this isn’t quite what I had in mind.”

Aria freezes in my arms, and she sits back to look at me. “What?”

I bury my hands in her hair and drop my forehead to hers. “If I’d known that you were going to misunderstand like this, then I’d never let it get this far. I’m sorry, baby.”

Her eyes widen in disbelief, and I see her connect the dots. I smile at her and press a soft kiss to her forehead, my lips lingering. “Baby, I knew you were Nyx from the second I saw you fix a script I’d been working on for hours. I’ve been trying to hack into your platform every day for months now. Did you really think I wouldn’t recognize the patterns you coded back at Noah’s house? I knew, but at the time I… Ash had a part of you that was strictly off-limits to me. I couldn’t tell you. Hell, I couldn’t even acknowledge it myself, because it meant losing the one part of you that was mine.”

I sigh and tighten my grip on her, hugging her tightly. “Ari, the second I sent you the files I had on my mother, I knew you’d figure out who I am. I just thought that you needed more time, that you were finding your own way to tell me. I know how much this platform means to you, and I was trying my best to give you space. I guess the lines started to blur in the last couple of days, because in my mind you and Nyx are the same person.”

I see her thinking through my explanation, assessing the truthfulness of my words. “You knew,” she whispers, her forehead dropping to my shoulder.

I turn my head and place my lips against her neck, kissing her softly. “I can’t believe you thought I’d ever cheat on you, Aria. I would never do that. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, and I’d be a fool to let you go. No one will ever compare to you, baby.”

She hugs me tightly, and I can’t even explain how that makes me feel. For a couple of minutes I thought I was about to lose her, and for those few moments, all I could see was bleakness. I can never go back to my life before Aria. I won’t survive the emptiness now that she’s shown me what true happiness is.

“I’m not perfect, Aria. I’ll make mistakes, and at some point I’ll probably hurt you. But I will never do it intentionally. Every mistake I make, I promise to learn from. I know you’ve been hurt before, and I know those scars still pain you. I promise you I will help you heal, and I will be here through it all.”

Aria looks into my eyes, and she nods. “I was in the wrong here, too. I should have told you I’m Nyx the second I realized who you were. I don’t want to punish you for pain you didn’t cause, but that’s exactly what I’m doing. You’ve done nothing to make me distrust you, yet I still did. I’ll try to be better, Gray. I promise.”

I lean in, my lips grazing over hers, before I capture her lips fully. This kiss is different, it’s more emotional and tinged with desperation. Aria pushes against me and rises to her knees, her hands threading through my hair as she deepens our kiss.

I’m breathless by the time she pulls away, feelings I have never felt before overwhelming me. “Together, Aria. You and I can get through anything together. Just promise me you’ll talk to me. No matter what’s going on, just talk to me. I don’t ever want to come home to find you gone. Don’t abandon me like that,” I murmur, my head dropping to her chest.

Aria wraps her arms around me and nods. “I promise.”