Unfamiliar Territory

It was like watching a pack of wolves. The six children running in unison—well, five, since Trout was being carried by Maple as she ran at the head of the pack. I wasn’t sure how she did it every day. It had to be something to do with their mother having Knowledge. Did it just naturally make people more athletic?

“Hurry up, fox!” Gust shouted behind him. “How’re you supposed to watch us if you can’t even keep up?!”

He was in the rear, just like every other day. And I knew it wasn’t because he was the slowest. I wanted to shout a retort, but I had learned my lesson. When I was running like this, just one slip up would be enough to put me down. Tea or no tea, my body was still not much more than a skeleton. There was only so much Knowledge could do, it seemed.

And he knew it.

“If you don’t catch up by the time we get home...” Gust went on, waving my cane above his head as he ran, “...then I’m not giving grandpa’s cane back!”

“Gust!” Maple called, turning her head back slightly towards her brother. “Stop.”

“Oh, c’mon, Maple, it’s been forever!” Gust whined.

“It’s only been two weeks,” she returned.

Two weeks since Dr. Quincy had to start his job in town. Two weeks since Kat commenced her owl-hunt. I couldn’t argue that it didn’t feel like forever. Every morning that I ran felt like the last morning of my life.

“Same thing!” her brother shouted back.

And, at the same time, they could have conversations while running. They would hardly be out of breath after the run while I gasped for life on the ground. Were they holding back for my sake? Gust always made threats like these but I would never lose sight of them-

“Alright then, Leaf, Lilly? Let’s ditch the slowpoke!”

The twins, who were running on either side of Gust, nodded in unison, like a secret plan finally coming to fruition. Maple turned more towards them as they all maintained their speed.

“Gust—!”

“Later, suckers!” Leaf shouted over her.

The trio took off in a dead sprint. They moved faster than kids their age should. Almost as fast as Kat and Mutt, and those two weren’t even human. There was a bend in the trail about two dozen yards away and they were approaching it in a matter of seconds.

“Stop, you idiots!” Maple yelled after them. She shot her head back at me then back towards her siblings. They were rounding the curve, threatening to disappear any second.

“Meadow, hold Trout,” Maple said, handing over the toddler as she spoke.

“I-I want to come with you!” Meadow argued. An unfamiliar sound. Soft and squeaky. I realized it was the very first time I’d heard her speak.

“You need to watch Trout and Foxy.”

I saw Meadow visibly flinch. She was easily the smallest of her sisters, and it wasn’t just because she was the youngest. Lily was only a year apart from her and she was nearly twice as big. It didn’t exactly help that her long, curly hair only helped to hide her small frame.

“B-But...”

“Please.” They stopped running. Gust and the twins were gone, somewhere further down the trail- the thick pine trees blocking them from view. Maple stared into the woods that surrounded us. “I won’t be gone long.”

Meadow held her younger brother close to her small frame. Trout practically squealed in delight as his pudgy hands found her long clumps of hair and began to tug. She must have been a patron saint of patience to put up with such antics without batting an eye. In fact, she hardly even seemed to register him. As she stared at the ground, I could almost see the indecision exuding from her like an aura.

“Okay,” she said in a soft breath.

Maple nodded, patted her once on the head, and then took off with blinding speed after her siblings. I was just catching up to Meadow and Trout as they stood there when Maple rounded the bend and was gone.

The young girl tensed up when I approached. If she was trying to hide her feelings towards me, she was doing a pretty bad job. Or maybe she wanted to know how uncomfortable I made her feel. Trout just watched me for a moment before losing interest in favor for his sister’s thick tangles.

I knew if I didn’t say anything there would just be that awkward silence which continued to linger between us. Maybe she was okay with that, but I wasn’t. It would remind me too much of my times spent with Kat.

“Didn’t think Gust would actually pull a stunt like that after the talking Maple gave to him.”

Meadow didn’t speak and didn’t move. She just stared off down the trail, her thin arms wrapped tightly around her brother. It didn’t look like she could hold someone of Trout’s weight for very long.

“Did you want to find somewhere to sit? It might be a little while before they come back.”

Meadow lowered her head in response, resting the bottom half of her face against her brother’s head. Trout, in turn, was now close enough to get her hair in his mouth, which he was more than happy to take advantage of. I watched for a moment as he tugged and chewed.

“Doesn’t that hurt?”

“No.” Her voice was just as soft up close. It was almost as if it hurt her to talk. “I’m used to it.”

She froze up almost as soon as the words were out of her mouth. I recognized that response- regretting the words right after you say them. In her case, she was probably regretting saying anything at all. But maybe it was a step in the right direction. Nothing else to do but roll with it.

“It looks like he’s gotten pretty used to it too. He looked happy about you holding him. Probably because Maple and Lilly’s hairs are too short.”

No response. Meadow even shifted her feet, moving just a fraction in the opposite direction from me. I scratched my cheek, trying to stifle a smile. It was almost cute, how shy she was. Even if it was because she was afraid of me, it was miles better than Gust or the twin’s reaction to fear.

“Well, I won’t bother you anymore. If it’s alright I’m just gonna step over here and sit-”

I took a step back and the heel of my shoe caught a loose rock. I lost my footing for a second, but it was all my body needed. Like having a heavy weight suddenly dropped on my shoulders, I caved under the gravity as the adrenaline spilled out of my body. Next thing I knew, I was on the ground, my back sore and my body once again weak and useless.

“Ah-Are you okay?!” Her normal squeak turned a little shrill as she stepped into my field of view. Trout was held against her, his head turned away, and her eyes were wide. Did she think I had suddenly died or something?

It took me a moment to catch my breath. I guess I couldn’t really blame her. Whenever it happened, my heart would always skip a beat and, for that split second, I would think I was dying.

“I’m good,” I said, trying to rise even though I knew it was futile. I let my head rest against the ground. “Think I might just lay here for a bit, until I get my strength back.”

Meadow loosened her grip on her brother and Trout almost immediately went back to playing with her hair. She swallowed as she looked down on me. I tensed what muscles I could. Was she realizing this was the best time to act-to take her brother’s place as the one who would bring down the fox? Was this shy girl routine just an act to cover up her true intentions?

“Isn’t that uncomfortable?” she asked instead.

I let out a breath. Too paranoid, too much time spent around people who acted opposite to how they felt. I was starting to see that Maple and her siblings were the types who wore their hearts on their sleeves, for better or worse.

“Could be,” I answered honestly. Might as well return the favor. “I can’t really feel most of my body right now.”

Meadow gasped. A sound I almost didn’t catch. The sharp intake of air, barely louder than a regular intake of breath.

“Did you hurt your spine? Are you paralyzed?”

I tried to laugh, but all that came out was a ragged wheeze. Paralyzed? Kids her age knew words like that?

No. Maybe not most kids. But the Quincy’s were definitely not most kids

“No, no, nothing so dramatic.” I smiled to try and reassure her. “It’s kinda like that time, a few weeks back, when we first ran together and I fell. My body is still pretty weak- one wrong move and...well, you know the rest.”

“Oh...okay.” Her eyes were back to the ground. I was trying to be funny, but she didn’t laugh as easy as Stallion or Mary.

My chest tightened as I felt the slightest of movements from the tips of my fingers. I had managed not to think of the Tea Drinkers for these past two weeks. It was almost funny how they still managed to crop up in my mind without me trying. Almost.

Was Mary okay? If Stallion and Mutt were...out of commission, then she was alone. Alone with Mallard and Mr. Copper, her Masters.

I hadn’t even thought of it before, but did she harbor ill feelings towards me for tricking her? The pain, the betrayal, the anger. Was she thinking of all the times we talked, walked to school together, laughed together, and hurting more and more?

I never said I was sorry. I had the chance to, when she carried me, half dead, from the lake-but I didn’t.

I hadn’t even realized until now, almost a month later, that Mary might hate me for what I did.

I suddenly had to fight back tears. Maybe she was happier that I was gone and out of her life. Maybe she wished she had never met me in the first-

“Fuh-Foxy?”

I opened my eyes. I couldn’t remember ever closing them. It was still daytime and I was still lying on the trail in the woods, so I probably hadn’t dozed off. Meadow was sitting a short distance away on the other side of the trail, a sleeping Trout in her lap. She let out a small breath and dropped her gaze when our eyes met.

“I thought you were dead,” she said, barely loud enough for me to hear.

I let out another weak laugh. “Nah, just...resting my eyes.”

I stared up at the sky. It was different from being at the cabin. The trees here were thick, their branches blocking almost everything from view. A few patches of blue and a few rays of sunlight breaking through the twists and turns of tree limbs were the only signs that it was still morning. I craned my head to see further down the trail. No sign of Maple or her brothers and sister.

“Were you crying?”

Meadow was watching me from under her bangs. I could only guess that having a barrier of curls made her feel safer, because she did not look away when our eyes met.

“No.” I swallowed. I closed my eyes as the sensation started to come back. “Well, not yet. Almost.”

I heard small stones grind together. Meadow was moving, scooting her body closer to me- slow enough so it wouldn’t disturb her brother.

“Are you hurting?”

“No, not physically. My body is still numb. I’m just...”

Now that I was thinking about it, I couldn’t stop. Saving her from that truck, playing pretend with her, listening to her talk about her books, getting those subtle hints of her troubled life along the way. I had good intentions for tricking her, but that’s all they were. I was fooled by Mutt, Mallard, and their club and Mary paid the price for it right along with me.

She saw me. She saw how I reacted when we were in the park, how I tried to fight to save her. How I failed.

I worried about her, I missed her, but I never even told her that I was sorry.

“Are you crying because you’re sad?”

“Yeah.” I tried my best to control my voice--my breathing, but I wasn’t sure how good I was doing. “That’s right.”

“Mommy said to cry but not be sad.”

“Maple said that too, but I don’t get it. I don’t get how you do that.”

“You need Lionel.” Meadow had moved halfway across the trail, halfway closer to me. “Do you still have him?”

“Yeah, of course.” I tried to move my arm, but it was useless. Like willing a far away object to move with my mind. “He’s in my pocket, but I can’t get him. I still can’t move my body.”

“I can do it,” Meadow mumbled, scooting closer.

She was right beside me, adjusting her sleeping brother to one arm, when she froze. “You won’t...do anything, will you?”

I cocked my head and smiled. “I can’t move my body, remember?”

“Yuh-You could be trying to trick me.”

I lost my smile. Was that really how I appeared to people now? A liar, a deceiver?

One by one, Mr. Quincy’s kids were distrusting me--hating me. It wouldn’t be long before I was stuck, alone, with a bunch of strangers. Like the club. Like the school. Like my own-

“Nevermind, nevermind. Which pocket is it?”

It took me a moment to catch up. “Th-The right one.”

She kept her head down, her hair shielding her face, as she pulled the little rabbit from my pocket. She held it in her hand, looked down at it, and for half a second I thought she was going to decide to take it for herself.

Instead, she grabbed my hand, turned it over, and placed Lionel down on it.

“You hold it like this,” she whispered, so quietly I had to strain to hear her over the sounds of the wilderness around us. It was strange, watching her close my fingers around it while I still couldn’t feel a thing. “And you bring it to your heart.”

She moved my hand and pressed the enclosed fist against my chest. She didn’t move her own hand away once it was settled; maybe she was worried mine would fall away on its own.

I still couldn’t see her face, but after a few seconds I noticed her hand trembling.

In fact, when I looked, almost her entire body was shaking. Was she really that scared?

“How long does it usually take?”

“Uh-Until the sad feelings go away.”

Her voice was cracking. Her shaking hand was slowly losing grip of mine. If she pushed herself too much, it would do more harm than good.

Trout was awake again, more than likely from Meadow’s erratic motions, but instead of playing with her hair he was looking down at me. This close, I noticed that his eyes were more blue than the dark brown of his siblings.

“Meadow, you don’t have to keep doing this.” I tried to move again, but the most I could do was roll my shoulders and angle my head more towards her. “You don’t have to push yourself for my sake-”

“I want to help!” Her voice cracked. It was louder than her usual whisper talk, so I could only assume that she was trying to shout.

Trout slid down into her lap as her other hand came down on top of mine. Both of her hands were shaking, but it was less intense when they were supporting each other.

“I’m scared, but I want to help,” Meadow went on, lowering her head more. I could feel the slightest of pressures in my chest as she pushed down on my hand. “You’re sad, you’re crying, and you’re alone. I heard you and Miss Elizabeth. I saw how she treats you. You might be bad, but you still hurt.”

I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t say anything. How old was she? Seven, eight? How could she, a child, say things like that?

“Foxy?”

How could someone like her affect me like this?

She raised her head, which allowed me to see her eyes. Maybe she could feel my own hand shaking, or maybe...

“You’re crying again.” Her mouth hang partway open after she said it. She looked really upset. She was terrible at hiding her emotions, scared or not. “Is Lionel not working?”

I tried to blink away the tears. It didn’t do much, maybe even made them worse.

I smiled, then laughed. It was really stupid, crying over something like that. “I’m crying, but I’m not sad,” I said, smiling wider. “That’s okay, right?”

The corners of her lips raised a fraction. It made me think of Kat and the first time I saw her smile. But, instead of feeling the same old pains and regrets, I felt light, like I could breathe easier. Like seeing her smile made everything else seem just a little bit better.

...

I had recovered enough to sit up on my own when Maple returned with Gust and the twins. Lilly and Leaf leered at me but Gust was looking everywhere but me when he walked up and extended his grandfather’s cane.

“Sorry,” he said, spitting at the ground after saying the word.

Maple was watching him like a hawk, arms folded, just waiting for him to slip up again. I peeked around Gust. Meadow had retreated to the other side of the trail by the time her brothers and sisters had returned. We hadn’t spoken once since I cried, but the silence between us was different, easier. When our eyes met she didn’t look away, and when I smiled she smiled too.

“What the heck’s so funny, fox?” Gust sneered. He flinched visibly when Maple cleared her throat.

I tried my best to lose my smile as I shook my head. “Nothing, Gust. Thank you.” I reached out and grabbed the cane, much to Gust’s surprise.

Still, to his credit, he held fast his end and helped support me when I tried to rise to my feet. When I was standing, looking down on him, he was taken back again when I punched him lightly on the shoulder. He jumped back, fists at the ready.

I laughed. “And thanks for apologizing, but its fine. Really.” I grinned as I planted the cane firmly into the ground. “Next time you try that, I’ll be the one who catches you.”

I could hear the twins scoffing, but I did not break my eye contact with him.

Gust eventually dropped his guard, lowered his fists, and smirked. “I’d like to see you try, fox.”

It was the first time that grin didn’t piss me off.