Twilight of the Gods

Kiss Evelyn.

The two words on the paper taunted him with their improbability. He wanted nothing more than to be with his Evelyn, but she didn’t exist in this reality. There was only Daeva, the shell of her that remained.

Still, he felt that fatal attraction to her, the echo of their soulmate bond in the deepest corners of his heart.

Odi tights his hold on Haydn’s arm, slithering up his bicep. “Something troubles you, my former vessel. Care to tell me what’s on your mind?”

He knew the Chaos God didn’t inquire about his well-being out of kindness. As an ancient, infinite being, he didn’t inherently care about his trivial, ephemeral problems. But Haydn also knew that as Master of one of the twin suns and Anhel’s fated lover, Odi wasn’t above the entanglement of interpersonal issues that plagued every sentient being.

“I’ve been thinking about Evelyn,” he said, deciding to answer the God’s question honestly.

“You’re always thinking about Evelyn.”

“She’s not the same,” he continued, ignoring Odi’s weary tone. “The mark that we shared is erased from her body. All of her memories of us are gone. Even her name–”

“In the centuries that you’ve spent pursuing her, did you really think she wouldn’t change?” Odi hisses the question harshly, interrupting his words.

“No, but–”

“She doesn’t think of you. She even has sex with her angel. Why do you pine for someone who cannot love you? There is an infinite cosmos of attractive women that look just like the Evelyn you wanted. Pick her successor and cease your whining!”

“I can’t replace her,” he said. “Just like you were never able to replace Anhel.”

“I’ve had many lovers,” Odi protested. “I romanced every single God in the Pantheon.”

“But you always went back to him,” he countered. “Time and time again, no matter how far you ran, you were doomed to love him. I am cursed in the same way.”

Odi let out a long, painful sigh. “It’s not the same. For Anhel and I, it has never been our choice to love each other. Fate has tied us so closely together that we cannot escape each other even if we were to have an eternity to untangle ourselves. You can choose to stop loving Evelyn. She has already made the choice to stop loving you.”

“No, she hasn’t,” Haydn said. “She hasn’t even been given the chance without her memories.”

“Do you really think she would choose to love you after what you did to her? You murdered her. No one has that much forgiveness in their hearts. Move on.”

But he couldn’t. If he were able to, it would’ve happened years ago. He still believed that the Soulmate Bond attached him to Daeva, the current incarnation of Evelyn. And despite what his eyes told him, he also believed that the soulmate mark would reappear on her body.

He didn’t think it was delusional to hope for these things. She had, after all, wished to remember her past self when they both started Nyx’s game. And as slippery as Nyx was, she always honored her word.

But Daeva wasn’t getting any of her memories back. He knew this because she didn’t look at him any differently than she normally did, offering him the cursory gaze of an acquaintance. He had been a large part of her past life, as all soulmates are to each other.

Haydn was tempted to think that it was impossible for her to remember him, but he had come up with a few plausible theories for her amnesia.

His first theory was that Anhel didn’t want Daeva to remember him. As the God who made her his Chosen One, it was in his best interest to protect her, especially since he had no physical form outside of her. Given the sheer violence of her murder, Haydn understood why the God blocked out all memories of him. He was even grateful for it, hating himself for being the cause of her pain.

This led him to his second theory, the one that left him wrought with guilt. He had traumatized her so much that her brain was physically blocking the memory, refusing to let her remember so that she could still function as a normal person. It was a realistic possibility, one that broke him to pieces.

But his third theory was much more sinister. He thought back to the Binding Chains that Ezra placed on the three of them to keep them trapped in Otherworld. Then he thinks back to the Elysian’s spellbooks and the other binding spells he saw in the pages. The chains were not only symbols of ownership, but also conduits of magic, much like the Conductors that the Gods kept on their mages. While the Gods used Conductors to channel magic through other beings, Haydn suspected that Ezra was using the Binding Chains to siphon magic from them.

Therefore, while he was leeching magic away from them, he was also preventing Nyx’s wish-granting magic to take effect on Daeva, which is why she didn’t remember that she was Evelyn.

Her amnesia could also be a consequence of all three things combined, but it disturbed him that Ezra’s control over her went beyond the torture. He took her entire past identity, robbing her of her name and body until the only thing she remembered was the pain he caused her. And as if that wasn’t awful enough, he was also robbing her of her magic.

Perhaps that was why he was so difficult to kill. He had an unlimited fountain of magic so long as the Binding Chains kept them tethered to Otherworld.

Haydn despised the fact that Ezra had made them into his puppets without ever forcing them to do his bidding. His influence was subtle in such a way that they were frogs sitting in a warm bath not knowing that they were about to become boiling stew. Except Haydn knew what it was like to be boiled, which allowed him to see past Ezra’s deception.

He needed to shake off the Elysian’s entrapment if he wanted a good chance of destroying him. What was a weak God compared to Ezra, who had spent centuries building up power? To defeat a master manipulator like him, Haydn needed to get on his level.

So instead of trying to kiss Daeva in a failed attempt to win Nyx’s Board, he was in Iris’s room stealing hers.

Like all the other Elysians, she kept her magical weapon hidden from plain sight. Even her devotees didn’t know where her Board was when Haydn asked. But Iris wasn’t clever despite all the centuries she dwelled as a powerful being in Otherworld. She was careless, the type of careless that made her the only God ever to be exiled from the Pantheon. It didn’t take long for Haydn and Odi to find her Board, absent-mindedly tucked away in the far corner of her underwear drawer.

“It’s almost sad how stupid she was,” Odi remarked, slithering on the Board. Dark pieces appeared on the squares, ready for Haydn to command them. With a single move, he could amass a following that would overthrow the current Elysian order and restore the old ways of the Gods. Many mortals would die in the war that he could start with the gentle push of his fingers.

But Haydn didn’t want to use the Board in that way. He had been one of those chess pieces once upon a time. He didn’t forget that it was the influence of the Gods that eventually led him to murder his soulmate.

No, now that he had the Board, he would use it in his way.

He places one hand on the wooden surface, sitting cross-legged on Iris’s bed. Her body had long been removed, tucked away in a hidden area where her fellow Elysians were no doubt trying in vain to revive her. He feels the Board heat up beneath his palms, hot with untapped magic. When he was mortal, he needed Conductors to channel the magic of the Gods. But since he ascended to Godhood forcefully after destroying Odi’s physical form, he had no problem absorbing magic through his bare skin.

“What are you doing? We should be making moves against the Elysians,” Odi hissed. He slithers close to Haydn’s hand, threatening to sever his connection to the magic of the Board.

“Trust me,” Haydn said, putting steel in his voice. “We can’t do that until I finish this ritual. It will make the both of us more powerful.”

Odi pulls away reluctantly, keeping his snake eyes fixed on Haydn’s face. “If you’re lying to me–”

“I’m not,” Haydn insisted. “I need you just as much as you need me. We are weak without each other.”

He pulls the magic from the Board, the tips of his fingers glowing with the white-hot pallor of an intense flame. He ignores the way his flesh starts to crisp as the fire of the magic turns blue, injecting lava into his veins. Iris’s magic was powerful, almost too powerful for him to handle. He admitted that at this moment, he had a begrudging respect for the former God and the power she wielded. Anyone would go mad possessing an eternal flame inside their body.

Even when his hand blackens with soot, he keeps it on the Board, fighting his racing heart as the flames begin to climb up his arm. With his other hand, he reaches deep into his own neck, trying his best to ignore the nausea of crossing his own flesh barrier. He rummages around his body with some difficulty until he finds his Binding Chain. Then, with much effort, he yanks it out of his body, leaving a bloody mess of ichor on the blankets. Only then does he take his hand off Iris’s Board and collapse on the bed.

“Clever Elysian,” Odi said, slithering beside him. “I didn’t know he placed such an enchantment on us.”

Haydn could barely hear him over the dizziness he felt and the stinging sensation of his hands. Not bothering to grace Odi’s comment with a response, he leaned over the side of Iris’s bed and promptly vomited over her soft carpeted floor.

“Fuck,” he whispered. A part of him regrets taking such a wild magical risk. There was a large chance that Iris’s magic would’ve consumed him, leaving his body free for Odi’s possession. He was lucky to only get a sudden wave of sickness. At least Ezra could no longer leech off of his magical abilities.

He stumbles back to the living quarters, barely able to hold himself upright with Odi’s assistance. He falls onto the pile of furs before the hearth, unable to stop the terrible pounding in his head.

“Are you sure you want to rest there? Evelyn and her angel were just -”

“Shut up,” he said. “I don’t care who she has sex with. She’s still mine.”

“Haydn,” Odi said, saying his name with a surprisingly gentle tone. “No, she isn’t.”

“You and Anhel made us for each other. We’re soulmates. No one, not even the Elysians, time, or her stupid amnesia can undo that.”

As if on cue, Daeva re-entered the room, her red hair ablaze. Her eyes pass over Haydn, her expression quickly shifting from indifference to concern.

“What happened to you?” She spots his burnt hand, eyes widening. She crouches near him, taking his flayed palm in her hands. Her warm touch soothes him and for a brief second, his head is clear. But then he remembers Odi’s words.

“Nothing,” he said, pulling away.

“You’re injured. It’s not nothing.” She rummages through the cupboard, grabbing ointment and some bandages. He takes the medical supplies from her, sitting up in spite of his dizziness.

“I’ll handle it myself.” He couldn’t bear the thought of her touch without her knowing what they once were to each other. He begins to dab the ointment on his wound when Daeva grabs his wrist stopping him.

“You’re doing it wrong. You need to disinfect the injury first. I would know given all the fights I’ve gotten into in the Mortal Realm,” she said sheepishly, her red eyes sparkling with mirth.

She’s still beautiful, he thought. So beautiful that she hurts to look at. It didn’t help that Evelyn used to smile in the same way, with the left corner of her lips quirked at an adorable angle.

He was so busy staring at her that when she started to pour alcohol on his wound, he screamed, pulling away from the sting.

“Sorry,” she said softly. “I forgot to warn you that it would hurt.”

I forgot to warn myself too, he thought. Just being around her was exquisite suffering. The more he tried to block her out, the more he noticed how attractive she was. The copper of her hair, the scarlet of her eyes, and the pale patches of her skin made her so heartbreakingly pretty.

Snap out of it, he told himself. Odi is right. She will never love you back.

As Daeva rubbed ointment into his wound, he felt a mixture of pain and pleasure. The pain came from the raw sting of the wound and the pleasure came from her silky touch. Despite the scars on her fingers, he still found the texture of her hands to be velvety, smoothly going over his palm.

“It’s the final round of the game,” she said, attempting to make small talk. “I saw that you didn’t like your task. May I ask what it is?”

Maybe it was because Daeva smelled sweet at that moment or because he had been searching for Evelyn for so long, but Haydn could feel his defenses lower at her question. His mouth loosened, ready to tell her that his task for the game was to kiss her. It would be so easy to say the words and have her back with him again. He would charm her pants off if he had to.

But shame stopped him. The guilt he carried over her death was a heavy burden he didn’t want to get rid of. He already ruined her previous life. He had no right to mess with her second one.

So instead, he handed her his slip of paper. Let her guess what those two words meant. It didn’t have to be more complicated than that.

“Kiss Evelyn,” she said, shaping the words with her red mouth. Her face brightens up and he immediately thinks of clouds parting for the sun on a rainy day.

“You found her? This is great news,” she exclaimed. “Where is she? I’d love to meet her. You’ve been searching for her for so long, haven’t you? You must feel so happy to be reunited with your soulmate.”

He didn’t have the heart to tell her that she was his soulmate, that she was the woman he spent centuries looking for. She looked too happy for him to tell her the sordid reality of his love life.

“I’m glad that I found her,” was all he could force out.

“You’re lucky,” Daeva said. “I don’t have someone like that. I think my soulmate died a long time ago.”

Odi laughs suddenly, slithering around hysterically. “Your soulmate is still alive,” he hissed maniacally. “He’s actually a lot closer than you think”

Haydn glared at him, willing for him to be quiet with the force of his eyes. Alas, it was to no avail. His black, scaly body was creeping closer to Daeva, whose attention shifted to him.

“What do you mean? I have no soulmate,” she insisted. Confusion clouded her crimson eyes.

“Foolish girl,” Odi said. “Tell me, what is Anhel whispering in your head? What lies has he told you to protect you from this cruel world?”

“Anhel has never lied to me,” she said, suddenly defensive. “If anything, you are the liar. Don’t they call you the Original Traitor for a reason?”

Odi raised his head from the ground, getting ready to strike at Daeva. “You don’t get to call me that, girl. I will not tolerate such defamation from someone who used to be so weak and mortal.”

Her eyes darkened, shifting to an inky black shade. “That’s certainly rich coming from a God who can only possess an animal. You have some nerve calling me weak.”

“My love,” Odi said, hissing in delight. “You wish to finally speak to me?”

Daeva’s face twisted into a sneer. “Speak? You’re hardly worth the dirt beneath my feet.”

“Be careful what you call me. I might actually like the filthy names you give me,” he said, slithering up her arm.

“Get off me,” Anhel protested. “You’re a disgusting pervert and you’ve been one since the beginning of time.”

“Only if you tell her the truth, First Lover. Surely you won’t deny your Chosen One the privilege of that knowledge. She deserves to know,” Odi sang.

“She doesn’t have to know anything,” Haydn interjected. “It will only hurt her,” he said in a lower voice to Odi.

Daeva’s eyes flicker back to crimson. “What do I deserve to know? You can tell me yourself, Odi. Anhel never needed to hide anything from me.”

The black snake laughs again. “You are Evelyn, Daeva. Didn’t you know that? Anhel has known this ever since he shared your body. Maybe he already told you this and I’m the same blind fool that I’ve always been.”

She blinks rapidly, her eyes briefly darting to Haydn. “You’re joking, right? Because if you are, this isn’t very funny.”

“This is no laughing matter,” Odi said, his voice shifting to a serious tone. “You are Haydn’s soulmate. Anhel and I created you both for each other back when Gods ruled the Mortal Realm.”

She turns toward him. “Haydn?”

He feels himself shatter at the sound of his name coming from her lips. “It’s true. You are Evelyn. But that doesn’t mean you’re my soulmate anymore.”

He holds up his wrist, showing her the black crescent moon etched into his skin. “This was our soulmate mark.” He grabs her arm, putting it next to his. “If you were my soulmate, the same mark would be on your skin.”

She scans his face, realization dawning in her eyes. “You’re telling me the truth.”

“I have no reason to lie.”

She stares down at their wrists, tracing the moon on Haydn’s skin. “It’s a pretty mark. I would’ve liked how it looked on my body.”

A dark mole appears on her wrist, shiny as a drop of ichor. Slowly, the mark grows, spreading over her wrist until it blossoms into a familiar crescent moon. Haydn looked at their now matching wrists in disbelief.

“How–”

“It looks like Anhel has been hiding things from you,” Odi hissed. “I merely removed the glamour over your hands, Daeva. Your soulmate mark has been there all along.”

“You knew this?” Haydn stares at the black snake in disbelief. “You knew that she had the mark?”

“It was only a guess,” Odi admitted. “I wasn’t sure how far Anhel would go to protect her.”

“I have a soulmate,” Daeva whispered, her voice equal parts awe and disbelief. She repeats the sentence again, trying to sit with the words.

I have a soulmate, he thought, numbed by the realization. Then, another thought hit him. She can love me again.

But maybe that was too much to hope for.

She was staring at him as if she were looking at him for the first time, her face flickering between wonder and uncertainty. There was an undercurrent of hesitation in her expression as if she wanted to ask him something, but he was sure he imagined it.

“You need to kiss me,” she said, stating the fact plainly. “It’s the only way for you to move through the game.”

“Only with your permission. You don’t have to kiss me,” he replied. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

She sighed. “Please don’t misunderstand me. I don’t want to be trapped in the game. If kissing you will free me, then it’s hardly a burden.”

“I would hope not.”

“You’re not a bad-looking man,” she started.

He raises his hand, stopping her. “Spare me your pity. I understand you perfectly fine. You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours.”

“You’ll help me with my task? But you don’t even know what it is,” she said.

“I’ll help you if I can.” But really, what Haydn wanted to tell her was that he would help her no matter what. She was his soulmate. He would do anything for her after spending centuries looking for her.

Before he could blink, she pressed her lips against his. She took her time, slowly moving her mouth, letting him feel what made her truly soft. And here he thought touching her hands was going to be enough. How foolish he had been, thinking that he could remain a thirsty man forever just inches away from the fountain. Tears welled up in his eyes. He never imagined that she could taste so sweet.

“You owe me,” Daeva said, pulling away at last.

“I owe you,” he echoed.

She smiles at him, satisfied. But then he could see fear flood her eyes, her hands shaking as if she was overcome with a terrible vision. He moves closer to comfort her, but she recoils away.

“No,” she whispered in horror. Her face twists in red fury.

“You were my murderer. You killed me.”