To Love Jason Thorn

“What are you doing in there, Olive?” Char asked.

I drew my head out of the freezer and looked at her over my shoulder. “Have you seen my ice cream? I hid it behind the peas, but it’s not there.”

She laughed. “I’m afraid you’re too late, I saw Lucy inhale that last night.”

“Damn you, Lucy,” I muttered, giving up on my search.

“Are you nervous?”

“Nervous? Who, me? About what?”

Tilting her head, she waited expectantly.

Rolling my eyes, I mumbled, “He hasn’t been gone that long, just a few months, and he texted me every now and then, but yeah, I’m excited to see him again.” Even though I knew I shouldn’t have been, I was. “And as if that’s not enough excitement for my fragile heart, I’m gonna meet the casting director and actually be there when they pick who’ll play Evie. I’m definitely freaking ecstatic about that.”

“You’re so lucky. I wonder who’ll come in to audition for her. If Keira Knightley is there, you have to take pictures. A ton of them. From every single angle.”

“Ah, Char,” I said as I hopped up on the counter empty-handed. I wanted to eat ice cream to calm down my nerves. “Talking about Keira Knightley isn’t helping at all. If I see Keira Knightley, I’m going to embarrass myself even more than I did the last time they saw me, and I don’t want to think about that.”

Walking around me, she opened the refrigerator and took out two small boxes of apple juice—taking advantage of a sale, we had bought them the day before. Handing one of them over, she jumped on the counter right across from me.

I sighed. “My savior.”

“I would offer alcohol to take the edge off, but I’m thinking that wouldn’t be very helpful in your state.”

“No, it wouldn’t,” I said, with a wince. “I’ll drink to my heart’s content when we go out tonight. Still coming, right? Don’t bail on us like you did last time. It’s karaoke night.”

“No bailing necessary. I wouldn’t miss karaoke night. So, how does it feel to be an early graduate? What are your plans now?”

“I haven’t decided how I feel about it yet. I’m happy, of course, but a little sad, too, I think. I paid off all my student loans with the money I made from the book, so that’s something. I feel as light as a feather. Don’t have a lot of money left in the bank, but at least I won’t have to worry about loans.”

She shook her juice box before jabbing the straw into it. “Yeah, I’m not looking forward to paying student loans every month. I wish I had the time to write a book, too.”

It wasn’t anything I hadn’t heard the past few months. I’d quickly learned that when you write a book, and surprise, surprise, you’re making money off of it—even if it’s only fifty bucks a month—suddenly everyone around you turns into a writer. Of course, they’re a much better writer than you, only they don’t have the time to sit down and go into la-la land because they are so very busy with real life already.

“Oh, you’re thinking of writing a book?” I asked mildly as I inspected the juice box in my hand.

“Well, I’m English lit, too, so yeah, I’ve thought about it. I mean, even you wrote one,” she chuckled nervously.

Raising my eyebrows, I looked at her. “Even I wrote one?”

“Oh.” She went poker-faced. “That didn’t sound right. I just meant, you never mentioned that you were writing a book and then bam, you published it on your own. It was just surprising.”

Lucy had been my beta reader since the day she’d stolen my laptop to see what I was always working on, but I hadn’t had the courage to share my words with anyone else. It wasn’t because I didn’t like Charlotte, it was just because I was too nervous about the whole thing.

In the silence that followed her words, she took few long sips from her apple juice before putting it down on the counter. “Anyway, the reason I asked about your plans…I was wondering if you were thinking about moving out?”

“Moving out? Of here?”

“Yeah. I mean we have one more semester, but since you’re gonna have money coming in from the movie, too…” She shrugged. “I just thought maybe you’d get your own place.”

“You trying to get rid of me, Char?” I asked, slightly amused, slightly wary.

“Of course not.” She jumped down and tossed the box into the garbage can; she hadn’t even finished it. “You know Lily, right?” I nodded. “Well, her boyfriend tossed her out so she is looking for a place to stay for the rest of the semester. I said maybe your room would be vacant if you decided to move out.”

“Sorry to hear that about Lily, but I’m not considering leaving. I like living with you guys.”

“Oh.” She looked genuinely confused. “The way you’ve been acting around Marcus lately, I thought you were uncomfortable here.”

“Marcus was my friend for a year before we started our relationship; we’ve been living together for almost three years now. I’m not uncomfortable around him, Char, we just don’t hang out together as much as we used to. Other than that, I have no problems with him. He is the one acting weird after this book deal happened.”

“I understand.” She avoided my eyes.

“Well,” I started, edging off the counter to get down. “I’m glad we did this.”

“Are you angry at me?”

“No. Is there a reason I should be?”

“No. Then can I ask you something else?”

I settled back again. “Sure. About?”

I pulled the short straw into my mouth and sighed a happy sigh when the cold apple juice hit my tongue.

“Jason Thorn.”

Intrigued, I gestured for her to go ahead. Charlotte didn’t ask many questions. She watched. She listened. She was shy to the point that it was painful to watch sometimes.

“When you saw that video of Jason in that alley…”

My face fell. Why was she even asking me about that?

“Were you upset?”

Do birds shit?

What the hell?

Letting go of the straw, I raised an eyebrow. “Where are you going with this, Char?”

“Nowhere.” Avoiding my eyes, she played with the coffee machine I had bought with Lucy the day I got my first payment from Amazon. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt. He is a movie star, Liv. I saw you two together that day—when he was dropping you off—”

“You left as soon as you met him Char.”

“I know. I know. But I see how excited you get every time you’re talking about him.”

“So?”

“Marcus thinks you’re—”

“I don’t care what Marcus thinks, Char. And to answer your initial question, yes, I was upset to see it, but not because I was jealous or anything like that. I don’t have a say in his life. Hell, I’m nothing more than a friend or an old friend’s sister to him right now.” I shrugged. “I’m not stupid enough to think otherwise. So what if I enjoy hanging out with him, wouldn’t you? It’s not news that he, um, enjoys having sex, for lack of a better word. Did all those people who bashed him on TV and online think that he was a virgin or something?”

She nodded thoughtfully. “I heard that after the video was released, he was booted out from a few movie projects, and there were rumors that he was actually losing his role in your movie, too.”

“Obviously, he didn’t.” I hopped down from the counter and tossed the now empty juice box into the garbage can.

“Well, still. It seems like he is a ticking bomb. I just hope that he won’t ruin your movie, too.”

The apartment door opened, and Marcus and Lucy walked in.

I focused on Char. “He is a damn good actor, Char. He can have any role he wants. They’ll forget about the video in a few weeks when some other celebrity cheats on his wife with the nanny, then everyone will focus on them instead. What’s gotten into you today?” I asked, frowning at her.

“What do you mean?” she mumbled, not looking at me.

“Hi, Liv,” Marcus greeted me on his way to the fridge and oh-so-casually brushed a kiss on my hair.

Startled, I turned to him as he took a water bottle from the fridge and walked right out. “What was that?” I asked to his back, pulling myself together.

He glanced back over his shoulder. “I said hi. Or is that banned, too?”

Lucy bugged her eyes at me from the doorway.

“Something is wrong in this apartment today,” I announced.

My phone pinged.

Thank god!

“My Uber is here. I’m leaving.”

“But I just got here!” Lucy whined. “You didn’t even hear what Jameson did to me today.” She widened her eyes at me. “In an empty classroom!”

“He rocked your world?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

She gave me a wolfish grin. “That he did.”

“See, I’m all caught up now. Text me when we’re leaving for karaoke night, and I’ll get back here to get ready.”

I grabbed my purse and walked out the door, not meeting Marcus’ eyes.

***

Finally reaching the building where the auditions were being held, I got out of my Uber and stood there to stare at the building for a moment. Was I excited because I was about to see my characters come to life? Or was I excited because I’d get to spend some time with Jason again?

“Olive!”

I turned around to see Jason getting out of his car. The way he stepped out and closed the door of that ridiculously sexy car of his…then, as if in slow motion, put his Ray-Bans on…

Damn…

Mini orgasm attack.

Then he got closer and closer, and I got an even better look at my dimple—mine, because I was staking my claim on that damn thing. After all, I’d seen it before all of his loving fans. First come, first served, right?

“Hi,” I managed to sputter when he reached me.

“Hi to you too.”

We just stood there and stared at each other for a moment, his smile getting goofier.

Should I hug him? Could I hug him? Was that even allowed? Why was I so weird?

Finally, he laughed and said, “Come here.” He gave me a sideways hug and looked down at me. “I might have missed you a bit more than you missed me, little one. It’s good to see you.”

Not the best thing he could’ve said, but then again I’d take anything that came out of his mouth when he was hugging me.

With my head tilted back, I looked up at him. Reaching up, I lifted his sunglasses and finally looked into his eyes.

“Nice to see you, too, Mr. Jason Thorn.”

Laughing, he kissed my temple. Had his lips lingered for more than two seconds, or was it just me? Did those two extra seconds mean something? Why go for the forehead and not the cheek? Did it have a different meaning?

Different meaning or not, my heart gave a happy sigh and the butterflies pretty much fainted from all the excitement Jason was giving them. I closed my eyes and savored the moment.

After we reached the floor where the casting crew was situated, he took his time to introduce me to everyone. The whole setup had a relaxed vibe, nothing scary at all. The casting director, Bryan, his assistant, and a cameraman to tape the auditions were the only ones left behind, and Jason seemed to know them all.

“I’m not late, am I?” Jason asked after shaking hands with everyone.

His eyes on the papers in front of him, the casting director waved his hand over his head. “Just on time, as always. Have you looked through the script we have ready?”

The script is ready?!

Jason nodded at Bryan and took the papers the assistant handed him. “I got them this morning.” After turning a few pages, he asked, “Which scene do you want to go over for this?”

“We’ll try the first time he finds his way back to Genevieve.”

“Ok. Great.” Glancing at the corner where I was sitting, Jason looked at me and winked.

I gave him a lame thumbs up and smiled.

Clearly amused, he shook his head and turned back to the director.

“Who’s coming in for Evie?” he asked no one in particular.

“We’re down to three names. We’ll see how you do on camera and then go from there.”

When I saw the first actress, Claudia Colbert, walk in, I was very proud of myself for not losing my cool. Even though nobody was paying attention to me, I still thought I deserved a pat on the back.

She was wearing a simple white tee with black jeans and Toms. Her hair was in a ponytail that was effortless in a way I could never achieve, and from what I could see, she had no makeup on. While us mortals had to have at least some concealer on, of course she’d been blessed with great skin on top of everything else.

She shook hands with Jason, talked with the director for a few seconds, then took her place in front of the camera with her script in her hand and waited for Jason to take his place.

“You guys ready?” Bryan asked, giving them all his attention as he got up and sat down next to the cameraman.

Both Jason and Claudia nodded.

“Let’s start reading from the top. I want to record the ending from two different angles so we’ll stop and take the last part again.” When they started reading their lines, Bryan was watching them through the little screen that was on the table. I tried to lean to my left to take a peek, but they were in my way, so I settled back and focused on hearing Isaac and Evie for the first time.

“How could you leave me, Evie?” Jason asked, already sounding like a different person—tired, broken, hopeless. He was becoming Isaac right in front of my eyes.

Claudia took a step toward him and tilted her head to the side. “I’ve never left you, Isaac. I tried, but I can’t leave you. But I won’t come after you either; I won’t force this on you.”

Jason’s voice turned harsh as he laughed. “Force this on me? What is this, Evie? Is there even anything left of us in you?”

She took another step toward him and lifted her hand, but then dropped it as both of her hands formed fists.

“Do I disgust you now? Is that why you can’t touch me?” Jason all but spit the words at her as his eyes took in her movements.

Claudia flinched and shook her head, her voice beaten and small. “I don’t want to hurt you any more.”

Jason dropped the papers and clasped Claudia’s wrists, lifting them up and pulling her against his chest in one quick move I wasn’t expecting. “You think your touch can hurt me? You killed me the moment you let me go in your heart, Evie.”

“Isaac,” Claudia murmured, and when she looked up at Jason, there were tears swimming in her eyes.

Holy cow! If only I had some popcorn and tissues.

“You were the one who left me,” she continued. “You broke my heart into so many pieces that I never fully recovered, Isaac. But none of it matters, does it? You aren’t here to stay. You will never stay.”

Whooaaa there!

That was most definitely not my dialogue. They had turned a perfectly romantic scene into a cheesy one.

She looked heartbroken.

I saw a teardrop fall from her eyes and Jason let go of her wrists as if they had burned him.

“I came back. I came crawling back to you,” Jason choked out. Leaning down, he cupped her cheeks in his hands, forcing her to look at him. “Evie. You’re my only one.”

They both closed their eyes and rested their foreheads against each other’s.

“Take me with you,” she whispered into the silence. “Don’t leave me bleeding again. Don’t let them take you away from me.”

Jason kissed her nose, her eyes, and then drew back a few inches, his hands still holding her face. “Say you still love me, Evie. Give me the words.”

She stood up on her tiptoes and whispered her love for him against his lips. Then they were going at each other as if the world was ending.

Well, mine kinda ended anyway. I was supposed to watch this take place in front of my eyes two more times with two different actresses? What in the world had I been thinking when I’d told Jason I would love to come along?

Someone say cut, goddamn it!

Then it was over and they parted. Bryan thanked them and asked for another take from a different angle. I refused to watch it for the second time. Seeing the same scene in a movie set would be a different story, but in here, with only a few people around…it looked intimate, real. Each and every one of us was an outsider, intruding upon their moment.

Finally, Bryan was happy with what he got, and after thanking Claudia, they sent her away.

I watched the same thing happen with two other beautiful, very well known, very talented actresses. The third one, Lindsay Dunlop, pretty much blew it out of the park. Bryan asked her to do three different scenes with Jason. At the end of it all, they had their Evie, and Lindsay was smiling just as big as Jason.

Even though I wasn’t being specifically ignored or anything, I was still sticking out like a sore thumb sitting in the corner like that. I had a feeling I was just there because Jason Thorn had brought me in. They didn’t care that I was the author at all.

Feeling overwhelmed with the kisses, the acting, the words…I sneaked out of the room—not that I needed to sneak out. No one gave a damn about what I was doing.

I was digging into my bag looking for my phone when someone came around the corner and collided with me. I stumbled back.

A second of shock, then I yelped in pain.

I glanced down at my front and saw that my entire shirt was soaked with some kind of green liquid. It smelled like coffee, but it was green.

Scalding green liquid.

“Jesus! Are you okay?” someone asked.

“Oh, shit! Shit! Shit!” My eyes burning with tears, I dropped my bag onto the carpeted floor. Peeling the shirt away, I started to blow on my skin to find some relief.

Some girl came running to the guy’s side.

“Sir, is everyth—”

“Go get me something to clean her up with,” the guy snapped at the girl.

“Olive Taylor?” He softened his voice for me.

Hearing my name, I looked up and saw Keith, the exec with the bleached teeth, hovering over me.

“Oh. Hello,” I said, my lower lip slightly trembling. I peeked into my shirt and realized my chest was already red.

Wonderful.

The girl reappeared next to us and handed Keith a wet towel.

“Let me,” Keith murmured, taking a step toward me.

I was in too much pain to decline his help, so I pushed my hair out of the way and let him gently press the cold towel onto my skin.

“Thank you,” I murmured. “That feels great.”

He met my eyes and gave me an apologetic smile. He was probably in his mid thirties, but for his age, he looked good—minus the teeth situation. When he slowly reached the swell of my breasts, I swallowed and looked away.

Maybe a wet towel wasn’t the best solution, but it was working. For now. I still had to lose the shirt somehow. It was completely soaked through and right then competing in a wet t-shirt contest was not on my to-do list.

Just as he opened his mouth to say something, someone grabbed my wrist and I was wrenched away from Keith. My head jerked up and I saw Jason pushing me behind his back, glaring daggers at Keith.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing touching her?”

“Jason!” I gasped, a little belatedly. His hand was still around my wrist, but his touch was gentle.

Keith appeared calm, but upon hearing Jason’s tone, he raised his brows.

“Jason,” I said, tugging at his arm, trying to get his attention. “There is coffee all over me, he was trying to help.”

“It is smoothie, Olive,” Keith said looking at me with a small smile.

Hot smoothie?!

Seriously?

“By groping your breasts?” Jason growled. He looked down at me with his flushed face and I frowned up at him.

“Jesus,” he exclaimed when he finally dropped his eyes enough to get a look at me. “Jesus!” he repeated. Looking into my eyes, he asked, “Are you okay, little one?”

“I’ll be fine.” I looked at Keith over his shoulder and decided an apology was in order.

“I’m so sorry. I wasn’t looking where I was going. Thank you for your help.” I looked at Jason, lifted my arm, and eyed my wrist that was still in his grasp. “If you can let me go, I’ll just leave.”

He didn’t let me go, but at least his face wasn’t flushed with anger any more.

Glancing at Keith, he said, “Sorry, man. When I saw you two…I assumed wrong.”

“Understandable. She is your friend.”

Jason’s mouth tightened.

What in the world is going on?

“I hope we’ll see each other soon, Miss Taylor,” Keith said to me and walked away from us.

Jason dropped my wrist and gently brushed the hair that had fallen over my shoulders away from my chest.

“We’re going to the emergency room.”

“No, we’re not. What’s wrong with you?” I asked, genuinely curious. “He was helping me. What did you think he could be doing out in the open like this?”

He had the decency to look away.

“How can I help?” he asked instead.

I sighed. “You should go back in there, Jason. I was leaving anyway.” Again, I peeled the shirt away from my skin. If another Uber was close by, maybe I could make it back to the apartment without being seen by too many people.

“We’re done with the reading.” He put his hand on my back and urged me forward. “Let’s go. I should have an extra shirt in my car. We’ll look at the damage as you change and then decide if we’re going to the emergency room or not.”

“Fine, Mom,” I mumbled, and he gave me a dark look.

“Your car really looks adorable from the front,” I said, once we reached the parking lot.

“It’s a Venom GT Spyder, Olive. It’s not an adorable car.”

I shrugged behind his back. To me, the eyes and the small mouth looked adorable.

Unlocking the doors, he leaned in and reached for something behind his seat.

A gray t-shirt.

“Take off your shirt,” he said, straightening up and turning to me.

“What?” I gaped at him.

His fingers reached out to lift the hem of my shirt, but I slapped his hand away.

“What are you doing?” I hissed quietly as two girls hurried passed his car, their phones glued to their ears.

“Olive,” he started. “I need to see how bad it is. Take it off.”

His hands came at me again. I slapped his hand harder.

“You want me to take off my shirt out in the open?”

He met my eyes. “We’re in the parking lot. No one who isn’t supposed to be in here is allowed to be in here. No one will see you between the SUV and my car. Go on.”

He reached at me again.

So, naturally, glaring at him, I slapped his hand even harder.

This time he laughed.

“Don’t make me take it off for you, Olive. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Your car doesn’t even reach your chest, Jason. I doubt it will do much to hide me from sight.”

“Face the SUV. I’ll turn around and cover your back. Or we can go straight to the ER. Your choice.”

“No,” I snapped.

“Then do as I say.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “You’re annoying.” After a short staring contest that only ended up making me hot, I was the first one to turn away.

Grumbling under my breath, I gingerly lifted my shirt off of my stomach and took it off. It wasn’t hurting as much as it had a few minutes before, but I wouldn’t say no to rubbing some ice cubes on my chest either. Dropping the shirt to the ground, I…

Shit! The extra shirt was still in his hands.

“Hand me the damn shirt,” I whispered, looking to my left to see if anybody was walking around.

“Why are you whispering?” he asked right over my shoulder, his hot breath tickling my neck.

The annoying-hot-jerk chuckled when I squealed and jumped around.

“You were supposed to turn around,” I accused him hotly.

His eyes dropped to my chest. His jaw hardening, he quickly looked up and away.

“What is that?” he gritted through his teeth.

Covering my breasts with my forearm, I snapped, “They’re breasts. What does it look like?”

Did he think they were too big? He probably did. I definitely didn’t have those small elegant breasts where you could go to bed without wearing a bra.

“Why aren’t you wearing something white and simple?”

Despite the stupid situation, I looked down at my chest and laughed. “Why do you care what I wear? And what is wrong with this one?”

He looked up at the sky. “It’s…it doesn’t…do anything. You can see through it.”

“So?” I asked.

“You aren’t supposed to wear stuff like that.”

“Says who? I’m sure you must’ve seen much better stuff than this.” I took a deep breath and let it out. “Just give me the damn shirt, Jason,” I said impatiently. “It wasn’t my intention to disgust you or embarrass you or whatever it is happening right now.”

“Disgust me?” His eyes shot back to my eyes. “Olive,” he said, taking a step toward me.

I cut him off before he could tell me something brotherly and piss me off, or—even worse—break my heart even more.

“Jason, there are people around. Please give me the shirt so I can cover myself.”

His jaw ticked, but he handed me his shirt, and I quickly pulled it over my head.

“Thank you.”

He took yet another step and I plastered my back against the SUV behind me. He lifted the shirt up, just a little. This time I didn’t slap his hand away. He’d already seen more of me than I’d been ready to show him.

He gently touched my stomach, then started running the back of his knuckles over my slightly irritated skin.

That thing that resides in your chest? Took wings and flew away.

The other thing that was in my skull? Turned to complete mush.

I sucked in a breath, my heartbeat suddenly slowing down to the point where I wasn’t sure if I was still alive or had stepped into heaven. When I lifted my head up, he was staring down at me—right into my eyes.

By then I was the perfect example of one of those ‘My body is ready’ gifs.

“It doesn’t look as bad as your…chest area,” he said, softly dropping the shirt over his hand.

He didn’t back away.

I didn’t look away.

His hand was still in there.

On my stomach.

Under my shirt.

Then he sighed and pulled it away. Suddenly I could breathe again.

Instead of begging him to take me right against the car like I desperately wanted to, I said, “I’ll be okay. I’ll put something on when I get home. It’s not as bad as it looks.”

He wasn’t happy, but he opened his car door and helped me get in.

Jason Thorn, my childhood crush and now movie star, had touched my stomach, gently, and I wasn’t hyperventilating.

Huh…

Maybe I was getting the hang of this obsession/love thing.