Chapter 4
April
After a few minutes of silence, I rolled onto my back. It was a little unnerving, I was used to the sounds of nature outside. Silence usually meant danger, someone or something nearby. All I could hear was the occasional muffled shout or bang that echoed from another part of the prison.
It still weighed on me, the events of today. August was still unresponsive, she had wanted her mate even more than I had. The bond hadn’t been broken, neither I nor him had rejected it yet. I could still feel him, out there, could he feel me?
“Ethan” I whispered to myself.
The Beta had called him Ethan.
Just saying his name sent a shiver of delight down my spine. Damn bond. Sometimes I felt like humans were lucky they got to choose, the mate bond could feel like a blessing…and also a curse.
The mention of our mate’s name had August raising her head.
‘I wonder what his wolf’s name is?’ she pondered.
‘It’s not as though we’re gonna be finding out any time soon…were you able to link with him at all?’
‘…no’ she whimpered.
Our wolves couldn’t communicate with others like they could with us. We shared a mind, our thoughts were the same. Our wolves could link with others through emotions and feelings, the stronger the bond, the stronger the emotions. Between mates and close familial bonds, those emotions could be strong enough to almost form words. It was possible to block out another wolf’s link, but it was seen as a statement of complete uninterest. Between mates it was a form of silent rejection of the other.
If I was so unwanted by him…why didn’t he reject the bond?
A shuddering thought ran through me…what if Ethan wanted to use the bond to hurt me?
Is that why he hadn’t rejected me straight out?!
Very few wolves ever cheated on their fated mate, they were your sun and moon, the air in your lungs, no other could compare to them. The physical pain of the mate bond being betrayed by an unmarked mate was supposed to feel minor but the emotional pain couldn’t be compared.
What if he wanted to show me just how little I meant to him…
This thought sent August back into her ball of isolation. I couldn’t stop the new tear slipping down my cheek or the sniffle escaping my lips.
“You ok?” the guard’s voice asked, gentle and softly.
I looked up, seeing his face by the viewing port.
“I’m fine” my voice sounded more strangled then I would have liked.
“You really don’t have to be scared. That’s not how this pack does things. Our Alpha can be a hard-a*s at times, don’t tell him I said that, but he’s a good leader. He won’t hurt someone innocent.”
If only he knew. I really wanted this guy to stop talking, he had no clue what was really going on.
I turned over to my other side, facing the wall, making it painfully obvious I had no interest in talking. I heard him sigh but he left me to my solitude, thankfully. My hair was still damp so I gathered it together and twisted it over my shoulder, before closing my eyes and trying to see if I could actually sleep.
The room I was in was dark yet everything seemed illuminated, the walls just seemed like a black abyss. This room…it was my cell. Not the one I was just in, the one in Monkshood Moon. A figure appeared with pale brown hair, brown eyes and tanned skin…Hunter. I could almost taste the alcohol rolling off of him from that night. He reached out his hand and I backed away, but there was nowhere to go. His grip was painful and as he stepped forward his features changed to paler skin and dark brown hair and eyes. I felt the deep dread set in once more as his hate filled eyes bored into my skin.
“Wake up”
What?
His mouth moved, but it was someone else’s voice.
“Wake up”
I woke up with a gasp, feeling someone’s hands on my shoulders. In a panic I flung my arms out, catching the person in the nose with my hand.
“Ooow, s**t!” the man’s voice shouted out.
I blinked a few times, regaining my barings. I saw the same black haired guard standing beside my bed holding on to his nose.
He must have noticed my confused and agitated state “You were tossing and turning, so I was just trying to wake you up. Then, you sucker punched me.”
“Oh…sorry” I spoke, sheepishly.
“It’s fine, no permanent damage” I could see and smell the trail of b***d from his nose “you got a mean right hook.”
“…did you want to talk about it? Whatever the nightmare was?” he asked, wiping the b***d on his shirt.
“No.”
“Are you sur…” but I cut him off.
“Look I’m sorry about catching you in the nose, I didn’t mean it. But can you just leave me alone, please?” I said, turning away from him.
“Ok, I’m right outside though, if you need me.”
I heard the cell door open and close, signaling he left. I turned to lay on my back once more, staring up at the ceiling.
I hated that dream.
The night I had escaped had been one of the most liberating and terrifying nights of my life. If he hadn’t been drunk, I would have never overpowered him. He would have marked me that night and I would have been bound to him permanently, only death would have severed his mark. It was also the first time I had stepped outside in 5 years, I had been confined to either my cell or the pack house. I also had to suppress August the entire time to ensure she remained undetected, so that they were unaware that I already had my wolf.
It was a dream that I had every now and again, but this was the first time it varied in such a way. I didn’t really need to contemplate the reason why. I could safely say this dream was worse, I never wanted to see Ethan’s face morphed into that kind of disgust again. Unfortunately for me, that would be the only expression I would ever see when he looked my way. Goddess, even when angry, his face was so handsome. My hands itched to run through his glossy, dark hair. It had been a little shorter on the sides than it was on top and had a slight wavy texture. Like everything else about him, it had been perfect.
Too bad I would never know.
I stared into space, noticing the light from outside slowly but surely seep in through the narrow window. Even though I had braced myself for the pain of the mate bond being betrayed, it never came. Maybe the silver in the cell was interfering, or maybe he hadn’t done anything…yet. I tried closing my eyes again and felt myself slowly drift off.