The Things We Fear

It was hard to ignore how uncomfortable Theo was becoming. As the end of the meeting drew closer and closer, the boy beside him hadn’t stopped fidgeting. It had forced Marcus to hold his tongue more than once as Theo jiggled his legs against his or twitched his arm, elbowing Marcus in the side. If Theo was developing a super-sniffer, he would soon know just how much it was irritating his best friend. But Marcus kept quiet, reminding himself how terrified the other boy must be.

Soon he would be dead. He’d still be in his body and have sentience, so it was the permanence of a normal death, but it wouldn’t be a pleasant experience to endure. By the end, Theo would be able to hear as his own heart stopped. As his cells changed from human to something other. Theo would be aware of it all happening, but unable to do anything about it. It was a terrifying concept. So Marcus allowed the boy his fidgeting, keeping his comments to himself. That he’d accidentally knocked into James a few times as a result of Theo’s movements had the werewolf throwing his friend the stink eye. Marcus knew better than to laugh.

When the meeting ended, everyone left swiftly. Many probably not wanting to be out after dark. Not with a monster on the loose. He’d watched as more than one person had eyes those close to them with apprehension. It would have been funny if the situation wasn’t so serious.

“So we definitely think this thing is after supernaturally inclined people?” Marcus asked the two beside him for lack of anything better to say.

Theo and James shrugged in tandem. For all their personalities were opposite, they had a striking number of similarities. Marcus chose to bury that awareness somewhere deep in his mind. He doubted either of the two would appreciate him drawing attention to the fact.

“How are you feeling?” He looked at Theo, who was almost bouncing in place for the energy he was giving off.

“Like my heart’s about to give out,” he scoff-laughed.

“Well, at least you still have your same lame sense of humour,” Marcus bantered back, hoping the familiarity might help relax the other.

“It would take more than a little death to have me not being hilarious.”

“Oh yeah, had a few little deaths recently, then?”

He watched as it took his friend a moment to realise what he’d implied. Theo shoved him away at his wiggling eyebrows.

“Perv,” he laughed.

“That’s a thought. What if you can’t after? It might be worth risking the cure if you can never get off again.”

The look of horror that fell across Theo’s face would fill him with sheer delight for weeks to come.

“Don’t be stupid, the pair of you. There are born vampires,” James said slowly, as though speaking to two very dim individuals.

“Oh yeah,” Marcus said, a hint of disappointment in his tone.

Maybe a small part of him had been hoping this might have been enough to get Theo to take the cure, the literal eleventh-hour decision that would keep him human. He accepted his friend’s decision, but it didn’t mean Marcus had to like it. Theo looked more than a little relieved by James’ words.

“Wait, will I still be able to have kids? I mean, I’m not sure I want them, but I’d still like to have the option.” Theo’s face was twisting in a weird way, reflecting the strange mix of emotions he was experiencing all at once.

Marcus shrugged, shockingly he had never looked into the mating habits and abilities of vampires.

“You’d be better asking the vampires. There maybe be differences between born and bitten too. They’ll know more than us,” James gestured to when Abigail and her group were standing.

A large group of the vampire clans had stayed behind, several throwing looks in their direction, so Marcus felt safe in assuming that they were staying behind to help Theo through his transition.

“Let us adjourn to somewhere more comfortable, shall we?” Cassius said to all those remaining, gesturing for them to follow.

A childish part of Marcus wanted to stay exactly where he was against the wall. Stage one of those “little rebellions” against his father, but this was all for Theo’s sake, and he did not want to do anything that might make this night harder for his best friend. If he dragged his feet a little though, no one but him would know. It was the small things that helped make him feel better about this ridiculous situation.

Cassius led them to a wide room. Not quite as big as the previous one, but still large. There were a lot of chairs and comfy seats across the room. Minus the velvet, it was very similar to the room at the supernatural party. He looked around, wondering how many rooms this house had. He had only managed a quick view of the front. It looked like a mini-mansion, but now inside he wondered if Cassius had done some magic to extend the space.

A part of him, that voice that liked to be a dick and make comments he’d rather ignore, said how Marcus could have grown up here. Never having to worry about money. How he wouldn’t have been surprised by the size and opulence if he hadn’t tried to avoid his father for so long. He would never regret growing up with his family. Marcus might not always get along with his mother, but his dad was the best dad he could have ever asked for, and getting to watch Brody grow up was an honour he wouldn’t trade for anything.

Sitting next to Theo, he didn’t even bother to feign surprise as James sat next to him once more. Eventually, they were going to need to have a conversation about all this. As much as Marcus didn’t mind having the wolf close, he was hesitant to simply let the other back in his life. The boy had hurt him. It wasn’t something he could brush aside as though it never happened.

He knew to prioritise and right now; the priority was Theo. Then probably Cassius as his (threats of) tutorage, but after that, after that, he would be sitting the wolf down and demanding an explanation. The murdering creature that had already killed him once should probably be on the list somewhere as well, but it would have to wait.

“What is going to happen?” Theo finally asked.

Everyone was sitting. The vampires were as intrigued by their surroundings as Marcus was. There were probably twenty vampires in the room. There had been over one hundred at the meeting, but only a few stayed behind. Marcus wanted to ask if the clans were like the packs and this was one clan in particular, but it was not the time. He would have to make a list of all the things he kept thinking about later.

“You’re likely already feeling lethargic, stiff, like your body is slowing down, I assume?” The elder vampire answered.

Theo nodded. Now that Marcus knew what to look for, he could see how the usually smooth motion was halted, like Theo was having to force the muscle to do as he wanted.

“Yes, my body feels like it once to run, but like there are lead blocks in my limbs.”

“That is the toxin. It has been moving cell by cell throughout your body since the bite and slowly altering your DNA. now as you are close to completing the transition, the changes are approaching your head and heart. It is the most dangerous part of the transition and I won’t lie to you, it will not be pleasant.”

Marcus couldn’t help extending his arm and holding his friend’s hand. He had logically known there were dangers, but it suddenly seemed real. This was happening. His friend was going to die. He would be dead. Maybe not permanently but for long enough that by scientific standards he would be considered a corpse. His brain would cease functioning. His heart would stop beating. His lungs would stop breathing. In theory, the vampire toxin (acting like a virus) would bring Theo back to life as a new being, but there was no guarantee. His brain could stop and never start firing again. Theo would be dead-dead, not undead.

Marcus wanted to pull him closer. As though hiding him in his arms might protect the other from the reality he was facing but managed to resist, squeezing again. Theo’s fingers were cold as they squeezed back. As though the heat were leeching out of him as he came closer to the grave.

“Will it change his personality?” He asked.

The book Cassius had given him had contradicting information. People who had changed and been the same person, whereas others were completely different. Marcus had considered maybe it was less to do with turning and more the new vampire realising they had little to fear now they were already dead. What did a vampire from the middle ages have to care about ploughing the fields and raising taxes? It might not be a change in personality because of the vampirism itself, but what would have happened once fears and stressors were removed?

“There are many documents recording the change. They agree there is a time where the brain begins to fire once more, in which the newly turned vampire is more animalistic. The higher cognitive functions can take minutes to hours to return. After this point though, it is generally agreed the person returns to their true self. However, the bloodlust is dangerous and can mean lapses in judgement in the new vampire for the first few years post-change.”

Marcus and Theo shared a quick look. It would make school interesting. If Theo could even attend school.

“Will it hurt?” Theo whispered, but in a room filled with supernaturals, they all caught it.

A few winces and awkward nods were the reply.

“You’re likely already experiencing a dull toothache type of pain, yes?”

Theo nodded again.

“Then it won’t be long. We have blood bags set aside for you and there are plenty of people to keep your friend safe once the process truly begins,” the elder looked at Marcus, “once his heart stops we will ask you and the wolf to step outside-”

Theo’s hand became tighter, not letting Marcus move so much as an inch away from him. He wanted to hiss but managed to bring his other arm across and run it along Theo’s arm, hoping to soothe him and have the boy release his iron grip.

“I am sorry if this distresses you Theo, but having a human and shifter so close to you post-turning could lead to you attacking them, as the room is big we could have them stand by the door, that way if you do react negatively, Mr Toulez will be able to move the young Mr Domm as swiftly as possible.”

“It’s Gall,” he corrected, but no one paid him much attention.

All their eyes were on Theo’s chest.

“Perhaps it is best you lie down now? To make the transition as easy as possible,” although phrased like a question, everyone heard the order.

Theo nodded jerkily. His movements were even more robotic and stilted. Marcus had to physically lift the boy’s feet from the floor and help him to lie down. He watched as pain played across Theo’s face. The winces, gasps of breath and twitching muscles showed how much pain the boy was in. Marcus took Theo’s hand once again, sitting on the floor next to where the other was laid.

He hadn’t even realised he’d been muttering out reassurances. Automatically speaking the words “it’s okay” “you’re going to be okay” “you can do this” whilst stroking the other's hair. Theo’s eyes were watery as they looked upon him. Shouted the pain he could not voice.

“Don’t you dare die on me, you bastard. You come back as a vampire, or I’ll find some magic to raise your zombie ass, you hear me?”

The twitch from the corner of Theo’s mouth was followed by a sharp intake of breath.

It was James’ hand on his shoulder that brought him back to the present. The boy trying to guide Marcus away from the now dead body.

“We need to move.”