The Things We Fear

Marcus couldn’t believe it had only been a matter of days since his birthday. Five days exactly, or five nights since Theo had been bitten. How had everything changed so fast? His nice comfortable world had been turned on its head over and over. He had motion sickness from how fast this ride was going and he wanted to get off. Unfortunately, the only way out of life was death, and he wasn’t a big fan of that option either.

He was still hesitant to believe anything Cassius had said. It made sense, in theory, maybe more than his father having a psycho cult where they sacrificed young women for jollies, but he didn’t call the man “devil dearest” just because it was fun. The man had the serpent’s tongue. Could tempt anyone down the path of damnation. Could make even the most outlandish situations, actions and reactions sound perfectly justified. No matter what the other said, he would keep a careful sense of wariness about him.

Cassius claimed to want Marcus to trust him, or at the least not continually snap and snipe at him. He couldn’t manage the former, but he could definitely work on the latter. If, on the off chance, what the man said was true, he’d feel pretty bad about it later if he dismissed it out of hand. Marcus would have to gather proof, but he had no idea who to ask. Not in the real world. But he could probably cross-reference a few things online. The chatrooms had helped him more than once, maybe they could aid him again. Making a mental note to do so later, he would also ask about the creature.

Even though Cassius had seen his memory, the two hadn’t discussed it much. The man was more concerned with Marcus’ untrained power. The only thing he had been able to gleam was how Cassius did not think the thing Marcus had seen was its true form. Merely a representation of the person’s fear.

“How did Lara die?” He’d eventually been brave enough to ask.

They were back in the office. It wasn’t exactly a warming room, but Marcus hadn’t wanted to stay in the room that “would be his during his stay here” and risk being tied up by bedsheets once more. The office at least had pictures on the wall and books if he got bored enough.

“She was crushed to death,” Cassius had said over his paperwork, no tact as always.

“I didn’t think that was possible for wolves?” Marcus tried again, it wasn’t quite an attempt at conversation as a casual interrogation, but if Cassius complained, he could easily argue to the other that he was trying civility.

“Yes and no. We think it set up a time dilation bubble. If it had happened in the few minutes she was separated from the other wolves she would have healed and been fine. The only logical conclusion is it must have happened repeatedly over at least thirty minutes, which given the timeline should be impossible, it narrows down potential creatures further.

“In your memory, when I reviewed whilst you were unconscious, there was a slight flicker as the door closed. I think that was it sealing the bubble. It would also explain why in a den of supernatural beings none heard or smelt your panic,” there was a level of displeasure to his words like Cassius wanted to hold the others responsible for the attack, but logic forbade him.

“What time will the others be arriving? I’ll need to go and pick up Theo.”

“No need, I’ve arranged for Abigail and her group to pick him up on their way. You will spend the intervening hours reading this,” Cassius slid a book over in his direction. “Before you protest, it is a book about what your friend is about to endure tonight, and I thought it prudent to have you as educated as possible before you bore witness to some of the atrocities that could potentially occur.”

Eyes widening he took the book. For Theo’s sake, he would read it cover to cover. That the language was as dry as Cassius’ humour did not help motivate him, but the idea of accidentally doing something that might harm his friend kept Marcus’ eyes on the text and dutifully absorbing every word.

“You do not need to religiously memories it, just the talking points,” Cassius announced after half an hour and only making it halfway through the first chapter. “If I’d known all I had to do to get you to study all this was threaten your friends, I’d have tried this years ago.”

“You didn’t think I had magic years ago,” he retorted, a lack of anything better to use as a comeback.

“You were my son, of course, you had magic. But you rejected it so thoroughly it seemed to have abandoned you. Or so I thought. I’m currently of the opinion it simply went elsewhere. Hid from others in a way it would be difficult to recognise.”

Marcus kept his eyes from darting to the corner of the room. It wasn’t as though he hadn’t considered the possibility himself, but that made even less sense. Why would his own magic spend years terrorising him?

“It is something we can look into over the coming weeks. Tonight we focus on the gathering, and you will help your friend through his turning.”

As much as Marcus wanted to reject anything his father said on principle, he couldn’t find fault in what the other had said. Begrudgingly accepting it was an okay plan.

“I will expect you to wear the clothes I have set out on your bed.”

Marcus did not and would not think of that prior prison as his bed, but it was a redundant argument.

“And you will need to shower beforehand as well. The less offensive smells you subject the new vampire to the better. Normally, I would also suggest the removal of the wolf, but I have a sneaking suspicion the Toulez boy will refuse to leave your side.”

Marcus decided to pretend he could not see the others smirk.

“And with a new vampire, if he does choose to attack, it would make me feel happier to know the wolf is there to protect you.”

“I can protect myself,” he muttered.

“Yes, I’m aware your magic can cause damage, however, Theo is a trusted friend, you will hesitate, your magic will not wish to hurt him. As you are untrained you will not be capable of forcing it. Especially not, with a mere moment’s notice, and that is all you will have, moments between the vampire deciding to attack and him being on you. I would rather rely on the wolf than your natural reflexes.”

“Fine.”

It wasn’t exactly a burden getting to spend more time with James. Even if every interaction did leave him more confused than before. He resisted touching his lips yet again at the force of the memory. The hope it might have been… but no, that was foolish. Marcus might never know who the man was who kissed him, and maybe things were better that way. He had far more important things to focus on than mystery kissers in the dark. But he could still dream.

As people began funnelling in, Marcus kept to the far left corner of the room. Hoping to avoid as many people as possible. It wasn’t working. Apparently, his presence here meant all of Cassius’ people felt entitled to greet him and try to (without an ounce of subtlety) interrogate him.

“Why was he here?”

“What were his plans for the future?”

“Would he be joining the coven?”

“Had he apologised to his father for being such a terrible son?”

The last one might be paraphrased, but it had been implied multiple times and made Marcus want to commit homicide. As much as he wanted to scream “how dare you?” and “go fuck yourself” he bared and grimaced through each interaction, hoping the wall behind him would at some point begin to absorb him and spare Marcus from this nightmare.

After the third grandparent with a young teen relative had hinted about an arranged marriage for the good of the coven’s future he had given up all pretence at politeness and pointedly told them he would rather shove pins in his eyes or die again than be with someone who worshipped reverend Domm. The looks of sheer outrage had been a balm against his fraying temper. He’d expected his father to snap or make derogatory comments about his behaviour, but the uptick at the side of his mouth showed he was more amused than annoyed.

“Now, Now, Deloris. Please remember my son is still new to all this. He’s a wildfire in human skin, it would be better for him to be with someone his heart chose lest he burns them both. Spare your granddaughter the inevitable heartache and third-degree burns,” it was said pleasantly, but Marcus was sure he was the only one able to catch the mocking in his tone.

The older woman simpering as though Cassius had just parted some great wisdom as he led her away, made his want to roll his eyes so hard he might manage to see his brain.

“That and I’m gay, which I already told her,” he added when Cassius returned.

“Yes, well, some of older people are still under the delusion that is a choice. Just try not to set them on fire during the meeting. We have enough problems to contend with without someone demanding I kill my own son for the safety of the community.”

“If someone tries to pimp me out or marry me off again, it might be a kindness,” he was only being slightly sarcastic.

The man threw him a look before walking back to the hallway to greet the latest arrivals. He had checked his phone over and over, but still no updates from Theo. the boy had confirmed Abigail would be picking him up and that she had messaged to say she was on her way, but there had been no updates in the last half an hour. Marcus hoped the boy had already been picked up and simply forgotten to inform him. It was a classic Theo thing to do.

Still, he kept glancing down at it. Making ti look like he was busy with something rather than simply fidgeting. He was in a room full of unknown supernaturals, he did not want them to know how nervous he was. He decided to ignore the small mocking voice that commented on chemo-signals and heartbeats. As far as Marcus was concerned, if he hid as much as humanly possible, there would be no way for others to cotton on. That was his comforting lie and he was sticking to it.

“Well, isn’t this a surprise?”

His shoulders rose in defence. A voice he was never happy to hear was coming closer.

“Didn’t expect to see you here. Are we finally embracing our witchy heritage?”

“Daniel, always a displeasure. Don’t you have a tail to chase or some poor unsuspecting girl to frighten?”

“Dog jokes, Marcus, really? And not even good ones. I’m not sure what I should be more offended by?”

“As long as you’re offended I’m happy,” he replied flatly.

“Oh, so cruel to your old friend. What did I ever do?”

He raised his head at this, “Were we?”

Daniel tilted his head expressing confusion. He definitely resembled a dog.

“Were we ever friends? I was James’ friend, yes, and maybe several others in the pack, but even as kids I always got the distinct impression you never really liked me,” it wasn’t a question, he remembered how often the other had tried to exclude him from group activities.

Marcus hadn’t really cared as a child, but after later being removed from the pack, Daniel had been the one to constantly keep a close eye on him, ever ready with a taunting word or hard shove. It hurt more how James pretended to be oblivious or would offer his own shove from time to time.

Daniel chuckled. Not a nice chuckle. He could hear the mocking each sound carried.

“No, I suppose we weren’t, but your presence was always such a risk. A constant danger. You were basically an enemy regularly invited into our den. Forgive my younger self if I let my wolf out a little more than is acceptable. But, it’s all a non-issue now, is it not? You, in the know, part of the community, embracing your true path. Daddy Domm must be so pleased.”

Marcus had to actively suppress the shiver at those words. He’d heard the jokes. With a surname like Domm in a post-fifty-shades world, it was just asking for filthy jokes to be made, but people usually had the decency not to say them near him. Of course, Daniel would ignore that common courtesy as well. Repulsed by the end of the sentence, it took him a few moments to process the rest of the sentence.

“And your excuse for at school? When I never said a word and left you alone?”

“Ah. do you know how a wolf recognises pack?”

A little thrown by the question, Marcus decided to humour the wolf.

“I don’t know, by howling, isn’t that how it’s done in the wild?”

Truthfully, he’d never thought about it. He’d watched a documentary on wolf conservation years ago and even donated to the charities a few times, but Marcus had always been more of an otter guy himself. Wolves were cool, but otters were the shit. Marcus pressed himself further into the wall, trying to create a little distance between himself and the wolf now plastered to his side. Maybe it was a wolf thing? Or maybe a Toulez family thing? Not knowing to keep some personal space between their neighbours. He could feel the rumble of Daniel’s laughter down his side.

“Somewhat, yes, but that’s more for calling each other over distance. We recognise people by sent long before we see their faces. Pack likes to mark pack, make sure they smell like us.”

“You’re saying you shoved me around because you wanted me to smell like you?” His voice sounded more than a little scandalised.

“Personally, I couldn’t care less if you smelt like a garbage can, but then my dear baby brother would get upset. Despite our alpha’s words, he always saw you as pack, always wanted you close by. It would probably take ripping his teeth out to get him to admit it, but I know him. You should pay attention next time he’s near. He’s like a poor little puppy dog. All big eyes and sad looks, reaching his hands out to touch but scared he’ll be rejected. It was the easiest way to help him keep control. Brush up against you, have you smell like pack. I’d apologise for how I went about it, but I don’t really care for your opinion of me.”

As blunt as ever. There were many reasons Marcus didn’t like the guy, his dumpster personality was just one.

“And you had to body check me repeatedly to do this?” Marcus wasn’t buying.

Daniel shrugged. “I probably could have found other ways to do it, yes, but why bother? It was quick and easy. You weren’t going to do anything and James would calm down for a few days once you smelt like pack again. I won’t apologise. Mostly because I know you know I won’t mean it, but for the safety of my brother, I’d do whatever was necessary.”

If Cassius hadn’t warned him about trying to set people on fire, Marcus would have been very tempted to use that skill now. Could almost see the surprise that would cross Daniel’s face as the fire raged toward him. If Marcus could learn to control his magic, he would definitely indulge that fantasy in the future. Ignoring the part about Marcus never doing anything. Technically, he’d done a few things. But magic coincidentally making the wolf trip or start sneezing couldn’t be traced back to him and he wasn’t about to confess. Not here.

“Right,” he answered flatly. “And me smiling like pack was good? Even though no one wanted me?” He tried to hide the disappointment in his voice, but suspected he was failing.

“James wanted you. Anna too. A few others. Even mom did, though she wouldn’t admit it. But like I’d known since we were young, you were a risk. Better to cut you off. We didn’t know you had magic back then, or that you were even in the know. Perhaps if you had ever said anything, things might have worked out differently.”

In the past few days, Marcus had experienced more waves of anger than in his entire previous sixteen years of life, but this anger wasn’t burning hot like the others. It didn’t scorch its way through him. No this was the colds of Tartarus. The fields of ice and snow that went on forever. Instead of burning anger, this was a wave of icy fury.

“Don’t you dare,” he began hissing, “dare blame me for what your family decided. I was a child. In shock. You threw me away like trash on the sidewalk. Then took every person I considered a friend away. Your family didn’t just abandon me, you isolated me. Why on earth would I have told you anything after that? Why would I ever trust a single one of you again?”

There was literal ice on the walls between them. His magic as frosty as him.

“Calm down, little witch or daddy will have both our hides. My mom and James are nearly done talking to him,”

Marcus swivelled round at this, noticing how Cassius’ office door was closed. He’d been so distracted by his phone and the wolf, he’d failed to see his father taking the meeting.

“Go fuck yourself.”

“No, there’s plenty of people to do that for me, but I prefer to top. If you know what I mean.”

“Then fuck off in general.”

“Oh, but if I could. See, my little Jamesy is going to come out of there in a moment and the first thing he is going to do is look for you. He asked me to stay close to you. And if he sees you out here all alone, it’ll break his little heart.”

Marcus decided to show how teeth. At least the wolf would understand this language. Daniel merely laughed.

“Oh, don’t go flashing those pretty gums at me. You don’t even know half of what our gestures mean. You could end up propositioning me and not even knowing it.”

Marcus took a physical step back in disgust. He wasn’t sure what his face was doing, but Daniel laughed as though he had told some great joke.

“You know though, little witch, you’ve always smelt a little like candy. I used to say to James it was lie you spent the morning rolling around in sugar,” he moved closer again, looking every bit the wolf prowling toward its prey.

“But you know, I’ve always had this theory,” he practically whispered in Marcus’ ear, “I think, with lips that red, you must taste like cherry.”