The Striker (Gods of the Game Book 1)

ADIL

Welcome to the Blackcastle Book Club’s official group chat!

Seriously? You put a picture from The Land Before Time as the group’s profile picture?

ADIL

Why not? It’s a good movie

STEVENS

Dude, that’s so wrong. It’s a children’s film, and we’re reading about dinosaurs boning

ADIL

It’s a good thing we’re not making them read the books, isn’t it?

ADIL

But fine, I see your point

ADIL

I wanted to keep it a surprise, but since you insist on policing my admin decisions, I’ve changed the picture to the cover of this month’s book club pick

ADIL

Gentlemen, prepare yourselves for **drumroll please** Shagging the Spinosaurus!

VINCENT

We already guessed that was the book of the month. We saw you reading it the other day

Aren’t you supposed to read it with the rest of the club? Why are you reading it early?

STEVENS

Yeah, that’s CHEATING

ADIL

It’s called vetting. Also, I’m the admin. I can do what I want

SAMSON

I tried looking for it at the bookstore yesterday and couldn’t find it. Donovan, what was the name of the store you went to?

Uh…I don’t remember. Just some shop I stumbled on in the city. I’m sure you can buy the book online

GALLAGHER

I don’t understand. How do you shag a spinosaurus?

STEVENS

The same way you shag a triceratops and a T-rex, genius

GALLAGHER

Oh, you sound so bloody confident. Are you speaking from experience?

ADIL

Gentlemen, let’s get back on track! This is a book club, not a fight club

ADIL

Our first official meeting is on Wednesday. I want everyone to come prepared with at least one discussion question

GALLAGHER

Dibs on the ‘how do you shag a spinosaurus’ question

ADIL

You can’t ask that. It has to be a THOUGHTFUL question

VINCENT

How thoughtful do you want us to be? We’re literally reading about dinosaurs fucking

And humans

If you forget them, that’s human erasure

VINCENT

Fuck off, Donovan

Spoken like someone who doesn’t have the IQ to come up with a good question

VINCENT

Yeah? Let’s wait until Wednesday and see. I bet my question will be better than yours

You’re on. May the better questioner win

ADIL

Okayyy. Moving on.

ADIL

Noah, since you refuse to participate in the LITERARY side of our club, you’re in charge of snacks

NOAH

Fine

ADIL

I’m thinking we could do a themed event with dinosaur crackers

ADIL

Do you think they make custom spinosaurus ones?

SAMSON

So we’re going to eat the little dude while we read about him getting it on? That’s so wrong

STEVENS

Poor Spiny. He deserves better

ADIL

It was an IDEA. I don’t see you guys coming up with anything better

GALLAGHER

How about jungle juice to stay with the dinosaur theme?

VINCENT

Dinosaurs didn’t live in the jungle

GALLAGHER

How do you know? Were you there?

Lol

VINCENT

Don’t talk to your captain like that

GALLAGHER

You’re our football captain. You’re not the president of this book club

GALLAGHER

Also, I just looked it up and they did live in jungles, so you’re wrong

SAMSON

Wait, we have a president?

ADIL

Yes, it’s me

ADIL

Anyway

ADIL

Noah, can you call the dinosaur cracker company and ask them for custom spinosaurus snacks?

ADIL

Hello?

ADIL

Noah?

Noah Wilson left the conversation.