Chapter Playing nice
Ever been through that moment when you feel mentally strong despite the odds not being in your favour, because you feel like someone is their to be strong for you and so you just rely on them for making it all right again, and then it suddenly dawns on you that they are just as gone as you are?
Yeah that sucks.
Especially when they are Sins, who are known for being fearless. I, however am a completely different case. Even though I don't know what they all are on about but it still is sending freezing chills up my spine as I look at their distressed faces. Nobody has said a single words since Kian confirmed whatever Wrath pointed out to. It seems like they have a telepathic understanding between them which makes me miss my sisters even more.
"Will you please elaborate Kian?" My voice was continually dropping its octaves till it was nothing more than just a whisper. I won't deny the fact that I was scared and it was a very small word to describe the uncanny feeling I was experiencing.
Kian looked at me with a very concerned look I did not know he was capable of pulling off. What broke my heart was its genuineness. He was pulling himself back, holding himself back from me because of everyone else around us and it surprised when I felt the urge to just pull him in and wrap his hands around me.
I needed the warmth they always tend to leave behind even though thats what I try to avoid always.
I hate to be hypocrite.
I shook my head visibly to clear my irrational thoughts.
"I think we should talk to Río." Envy said all of a sudden.
His words sparked a sudden tension in my veins and it spread like a fire inside my whole body waking up an emotion I have never felt so intensely before. It was anger and it was fierce. So much so that I sensed myself visibly shaking because I couldn't control it. I did not know how to. Maybe it was because of Wrath who was standing near me. Was he doing this? Was he emitting his vibes in me? Was he controlling my senses so that I embarrass myself infront of everyone? Because I saw him smirking at me. What was his problem?!
He was enjoying at my lack of information, wasn't he? Me being clueless was serving him as a feast.
I was burning. My own skin was heating up with the pressure it was keeping inside itself and when I thought I couldn't handle it anymore I stormed out of the kitchen much to everyone's surprise. Much to Kian's shocked face.
I ran through the hallway and burst into my room. I rushed to bathroom and slid down the cool glass sliding door. The cold marble floor was feeling good on my burning skin. I brought my knees upto my chest and rested my head on it. All the possibilities, situations, decisions that could go horribly wrong rushed through my mind and my eyes gave up, not able to control the tears. I sobbed silently into my knees, trying hard to not make any sound.
Everything was silent around me, so quiet that I was able to hear the sound of my tears making their was down my cheek and onto the floor. So obviously I caught the footsteps in the hallway that stopped right infront of my door. His essence reached to me before he could, conforming his presence. He knocked a few times and when couldn't get me to answer, entered in. I heard the lock of door. He was in the room.
"Shye.." His voice was an echo of soft whisper in my ear, reverberating my eardrums. I hid my face in my arms when his steps neared the bathroom. Silence fell over the room when he stopped near the door. I could feel his gaze on me.
I am sure he is shocked to find me like this. A messed up girl crying out of frustration. Has he ever dealt with this? I don't think so. He must be habitual of girls throwing themselves at his feet, falling for his looks everyday but I am certain he has no idea what to do now, with me crying. He couldn't have dealt with that. Or has he? Has he had a girlfriend before or now? A lover?
For some reason that thought made me even more sad. I don't know from where it came but it surely dragged my soul down in the dumps.
I couldn't keep my tears in and they kept flowing down. My whole body was shaking because of the anger, the sadness that was coming out in the form of drops from my eyes.
I felt him nearing me, he stooped right in front of me. I didn't know what to do, I couldn't look up at him, I was too ashamed of myself to meet those piercing orbs.
"Shye?" He called and when I shook my head in response still not looking at him, he crouched down right in front of me. His large frame hovering over mine. "Look at me."
"N-No. GG-Go awa-y." I stammered my answer out. He sighed heavily and grabbed my hands pulling them away from my face. I protested but he was too strong and in a quick succession pulled my entire self on his lap.
He cradled me and in that moment I gave up all the resistance for the time being. I embraced the warmth his body was emitting. My hands flew around his neck and I buried my face in the crook of his neck sobbing my heart out. He kept rubbing my back which shot up gentle sparks throughout my body until my sobs and all the crying turned into the occasional hiccups.
He did not let me go though, held me close to him, locked and secured in his arms. I didn't care either. His presence felt soothing and calmed me all together. Funny how I keep denying this all the time when in fact this is the only thing that is keeping me sane right now. Our mate bond is keeping me sane right now.
"Are you okay now?" He asked gently but didn't move in case I might cry again but I was done. Blank. Nothing came to me. He pacified my chaotic thoughts and now they were gone leaving behind a placid state on its tail.
I was still in his arms in the middle of the bathroom floor. He was still carrying me on his lap not complaining about my sudden outburst. Just being there. And I was grateful for it. I nodded in his neck in response.
"You freaked me out. You freaked all of us out." He said. His tone was too calm unlike his words. I pulled away enough to look at him, forgetting my dishevelled look and sticky face from dried tears.
There was this urgency in his eyes, the one that was trying to peek from behind his suppressed emotions and in that moment I realised how selfish I have been. In my own burdens of trying to find a clue, trying to help my drowning self, I forgot how he was suffering equally.
I burst entered into his territory, he could have punished me but did not. The bond of mate, which I happened to be worried about all this time must have been tough for him too. I never expected a Sin to be my mate but then he could have never expected a Virtue as his mate either. He must be under the same pressure too as myself.
He is helping me to find Virtues even though its not even the last thing he should be doing as a Sin. He went against his brothers just to make me feel comfortable here and what I did?
I let all the anger down my body, allowing it to consume my rationality. I kept wallowing about my situation skipping his obvious agitation and frustration with all the revelations.
A sole tear rolled down my cheek and his eye followed down the same path where it fell on his fingertip ready to catch more if they fell too. He traced the same path up with his index finger, leaving behind a tail of sparks firing up my skin and mark. His both hands cradled my head, the pad of his thumb cleaning the remnants of wetness.
"I am sorry." I apologised, looking down. "I really am."
He tipped my chin up to meet his gaze.
"Don't." He shook his head. "It was Rage. Messing with your head. Its okay."
His eyes confirmed the genuineness which his words targeted.
"No. I didn't mean that." He frowned. "I am sorry because, this whole thing, all the fiasco must be taking a toll on you. To top it all....."
His lips twitched. Those lavender eyes sparking up again, the dullness long forgotten.
"Our bond?" He completed for me finally showing the smirk which I hate to admit was shamefully missed. I nodded.
"Its not a burden for me." My eyes snapped to his. He smiled at me. And I had to blink once, twice till I was was sure that I actually saw him smiling at me.
That small, authentic, shy, secret, reserved smile. At me. For me.
Its not a burden for me.
"Yeah?" I smiled back not really able to contain my glee.
"Yeah."
We kept staring into each other's eye till I finally realised that I was still sitting on his lap. Instantly, blush crept up my neck and cheeks and I scrambled to get off of him but he only tightened his hold on me.
"Let me go Kian." I requested. He grinned at me and the air around us suddenly shifted. Charged. Playful. Hard to concentrate.
"Not stopping you, am I?"
"Yes. Aren't you?." I said tilting my head to side. Like him. Right back at him.
"I am." And he twisted us, grabbing my waist and whirling around, pushing me down on the floor. I shut my eyes anticipating the clash that never came. I felt his one hand under my head, serving as a pillow. Opening an eye, I saw him looking down at me with some emotion I couldn't decipher.
I raised at brow at him. He didn't react so I started struggling in his hold, trying to wriggle my way out which was of course fruitless. His arms made sure to keep me pinned to the floor.
"Kian." I exasperated which only made his grin wider.
"Yes?"
"Let me go!" I exclaimed.
"Uh huh." Nope. Nothing.
"Look." I started.
"Show?" He wiggled his brows and earned a glare in return.
"You are sick." I scolded but his look made my restrained smile escape without my will.
"No no no." He shook his head and looked at me seriously. "You have got it wrong. I am not sick. I am Sin. Pride. Remember?"
I gave him a blank look.
Seriously?
You have got to be kidding me.
"Yes. I remember. Now please get off." I said pushing him and he finally let go, getting off me and standing up. He stuck his hand out for me to take which I did ignoring the sparks my mark was firing away.
"Better?" He asked me with concern and I nodded smiling gratefully.
"Why playing so nice?" I teased and he smirked. He was about to go out but stopped and made his way to me again.
Yes. Invade in. You forgot that. Do it now.
I pushed away my stupid thoughts aside. But they were right. He came in close bringing his lips closer to my ear.
"Because my darling mate, nice is a nice way to start what I have in my mind."
Definitely not nice.
-*-
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-Lia