The Silver Siren

Friday's class rolled around quickly, and I had planned my ass off to the nearest second. I was nervous but I was also excited and, amazingly, somewhat confident about it. Even if I did something stupid, like fall flat on my face, I knew the guys in the class would find it funny and I wouldn’t feel embarrassed at all. It’s one of the main reasons I want to open my own gym. That feeling you get when you feel you belong, have like-minded people around you and feel safe with them is one of the main reasons I have enjoyed classes so much, not just self-defence, but all of them. It’s like belonging to one giant combat family! I want to create that for other people, especially young teens.

Unfortunately, my stomach didn’t recognise my confidence and the butterflies swimming around my stomach started early. The class wasn’t until the afternoon and every hour that ticked by was agonising torture. I decided to àhead to the gym early and get a workout in beforehand. As I jogged rhythmically on the treadmill, I let my mind wander to my future plans. Opening my own gym would be a dream come true. I had thought about going to college but had decided against it. The cost of college alone would delay my plans too much, so I had opted to get a job and save hard. I also needed to gain some more experience and taking the class was a step in the right direction. 

Grabbing my towel when the treadmill program came to an end, I wiped down my face and neck. A quick glance at my watch told me it was time to get ready, so I went to the changing rooms and quickly changed into a clean sports bra, underwear and running pants. My heart was pounding when I looked in the mirror. I splashed some refreshing cold water on my face, and it calmed me down. I took a deep breath and left the changing rooms. This was it. 

As I laid the mats down in the training room, the class members started to arrive. Familiar faces trickled in, each uttering a warm greeting. It was just another day to them, and my nerves started to melt away. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted Kayla slinking through the door. She didn’t attend this class anymore, having outgrown it years ago and she didn’t volunteer either. I gave her a quizzical look and she threw me a smile.

She walked over to me and said “Hey, need some help?”

“Sure” I said, smiling. She wrapped me in a tight hug. “Thanks,” I said once she released me. My heart swelled. Being an only child, I longed for siblings. Having Kayla as my best friend felt as close to having a sister as I could get, or at least what I thought having a sister would feel like. I knew she had my back and I had hers too.

Soon everything was ready, and it was time to start the lesson. I took a deep breath. 

“Everyone ready to warm up?” I shouted. Everyone answered my question by getting into position to start a warmup. Once we were all warmed up nicely, I moved on to practising some defensive moves that the class have been learning over the last few sessions. Then I moved on from that by pairing off people based on ability and experience. I wanted to see what the less experienced members of the group could do under pressure when faced with a more experienced opponent. It was also a good opportunity to see how the more experienced members handled being with the less experienced members. Would they nurture them, or would they lose patience with their lack of experience? It was a good way of working out which members could be used to help those with little confidence, beginners and those who needed a bit more time to pick things up. 

I settled into a comfortable stride pretty much as soon as we launched into the warmup. It felt like I was meant to be here, doing this. At that moment, I couldn’t imagine myself doing anything else with my life. Before I knew it, it was time to wrap things up. As Kayla and I cleared away the last of the mats, I felt proud of myself for what I accomplished today. Sure, it was one little class, but it meant so much more. It felt right. It gave me the confidence in myself to know I could do it, to know that when the time came and I had enough money, that I could open my own gym and teach my own classes one day. Determination coursed through my veins, and I felt powerful.

“You were great!” squealed Kayla, jolting me out of my daydreams.

“Thanks,” I said. “And thanks for helping today.”

“Sure,” she said smiling, “you know I wouldn’t have missed it.”

We finished up and headed to the locker room. I quickly jumped in the shower, enjoying the warm spray on my skin. As I got out, I glanced at my reflection in the mirror. I couldn’t stop smiling. I was buzzing. This was, hands down, the best day ever! I dried myself and dressed in a pair of blue skinny jeans, a white t-shirt and my very well-loved black sneakers. I didn’t bother blow drying my hair, it would take way too long so I bundled it up into a bun on the top of my head and went to find Kayla. 

She was in the café talking to Cathy, another server, and had bought me a bottle of ice-cold water that I accepted eagerly. I chugged half the bottle and looked at Kayla, “Ready to go?” I asked.

“Yeah, do you need a ride?” she asked.

“Yes please” I answered.

As we drive home, Kayla asked me how I thought the class went.

“I loved it!”, I gushed, “I’m 100% sure this is what I want to do”.

“What about college? You sure you don’t want to give it a try?” she asked. She will be starting community college in the fall. I screwed up my nose. “No, I need to save every penny to be able to open up my own gym,” I said adamantly. Although I would have got a scholarship, I wouldn’t have time to study AND work enough to build enough funds for the gym. 

“I’ll miss you” she said. She will still be able to live at home when she starts college, but I know she had her heart set on us both attending the same college so we could experience it together. Kayla had wanted to stay close to home so that she could continue with her education when she finds her mate. She is far more interested in finding her mate than I am. I have bigger plans that don’t involve having a mate to please.

“We’ll still see each other,” I said, trying to console her, “Promise. And we’ve still got all summer together! And your birthday to look forward to.”

She smiled. “And yours tomorrow, in case you’d forgotten!” she giggled, her blond hair bouncing around her face. “We’re catching a movie, right?”

“Yep. Let’s catch an early showing and then have pizza for lunch?” I said excitedly. I could always get excited about food, and pizza was my ultimate favourite. I don’t tend to worry about calorie counting, and I’m pretty happy with my body. Sure, it would be nice to be a little taller, but there wasn’t much I could do about that. I work out a lot and my body shape never changes, despite my regular pizza over-indulgences, and I am healthy and strong. But at 5 feet talI, I certainly don’t look strong. When I was competing in amateur competitions at school, my opponents used to think that I was an easy win. I always thought it was hilarious when I beat their ass and wiped the smug look off their faces! I guess I am quite strong for my age, and that strength would only increase once I turned 18 tomorrow and shifted for the first time. I couldn’t deny that I was intrigued by the increase in my strength, but I was also nervous. I’ve heard that the first time is painful, and I wasn’t looking forward to that part. Melissa was going to come with me, to make sure I’m alright during the shift but, to be honest, she seems more nervous about it than me. When we talked about it last night, she sat playing with her hands nervously in her lap.

“It will be painful, Allie, and the first shift can last up to an hour,” she explained softly.

“An hour?” I gulped. I hadn’t imagined it could go on for that long! 

“I was there with your mother for her first shift. It took her almost that long,” she said, a weak smile forming on her lips but her eyes looking as sad as they always did. “She was magnificent” she said tenderly, “And strong. You will be just fine, sweetie.” 

My eyes widened hearing her words and a warm feeling radiated through my chest. I knew she meant that I am just like her. Melissa has always encouraged me to pursue combat sports and become stronger and I don’t know what I would do without her. She supports me in everything I do.

We spent the evening together in comfortable silence, watching a movie. I hadn’t pushed for any more information about my mother, although I had a strong urge to at that moment. She had taken me by surprise earlier and I wondered why she had been so open when she hasn’t all these years. I thought it might be because I will be 18 in a few days, and that means I am officially an adult. She might be a bit more open about them if she thought I was mature enough. 

As Kayla pulled into the driveway, I invited her in, and we hung out for a while. Relaxing in my bedroom, Kayla casually rummaged through my closet. With a horrified look on her face she said, “Girl, we need to take you shopping urgently!” She pushed tracksuit after tracksuit down the rail, making more horrified sounds as she examined each one. 

“I don’t need to go shopping,” I said, thinking how much I completely detest shopping. Melissa has tried to get me into it many times, but after several failed attempts to get me to enjoy any part of it, she accepted that I’m just not that kind of girl! Kayla, however, had never given up on the challenge, frequently suggesting shopping. I buy most of my workout clothes and some casual pieces, like jeans, online now. 

“Strongly disagree!!” Kayla giggled, her light laughter morphing into a hopeless sigh as she looked at me. I know that look. I feel a pep talk coming on. 

“Allie….” Yep, here it is! “You’ll be an adult tomorrow. Don’t you think you should dress like one?” she smiled sweetly. 

“Hmm,” I mumbled. Damn this girl, she’s always right. If I wanted to open my own gym, I needed people to take me seriously and see me as a responsible adult. I did need to look the part and look more mature.

“I suppose you could be right…maybe,” I grumbled.

“Yay!” Kayla jumped up and down in a happy little dance. “That’s settled then, after the movie tomorrow, we will hit the mall for a birthday shopping extravaganza. Who knows when I’ll be able to get you shopping again!” She looked at me, waiting for my reaction. When no protest came from my mouth when I opened it, she squealed “I’m so excited!” She looked triumphant, and I know she was feeling it too. She has been trying to get me on a shopping trip for years! I couldn’t help but laugh and she hugged me.

“And it will be my treat. It is your birthday after all, you can consider it my gift to you. Because let’s be honest, what else was I going to get you? More yoga pants?!” she asked sarcastically.

“What’s wrong with yoga pants?” I asked, and we both erupted in giggles. I didn’t bother even trying to protest at her generous gift, it would be pointless anyway. Once this girl got an idea, she was like a dog with a bone. 

We watched a movie, a girly rom com on Netflix, Kayla’s choice. Not my kind of movie, but I went along with it. We made some snacks and the predictable happy ending played out as the movie ended. “Just think, that could be you tomorrow, finding your Prince Charming!” Kayla gushed.

“Um, I don’t think so!” I said adamantly. 

“Allie, there is a very real possibility that you could find your mate tomorrow!” she rambled breathlessly, her blue eyes sparkling. She was the ultimate hopeless romantic. With long blond hair and a slender figure, Kayla was stunning. She had a sprinkling of freckles across her dainty nose, and her perfectly shaped face made her look sweet and angelic. It perfectly mirrored her personality, and I knew she would have no trouble pleasing her mate with her exquisite beauty and happy vibes. She was kind and caring and she would make a wonderful mate, because she believed in the stupid mate bond. 

And me? I believed it was a crock of shit.