The She-Wolf Alpha (Book 1 She-Wolf Series)

A long stretch of silence passed between us. We were both absolutely lost in thought.

Eventually, the turn for my subdivision came into view. I was acutely aware that Emerick and I were still holding hands. A blush crept over my cheeks and I gently pulled away. I thought I caught a flash of a frown cross over my companion’s face before he quickly masked it.

Emerick slid into the driveway and cut the engine before jogging around the car to open my door. As he walked me to my front stoop, I felt a pang of disappointment that our time alone was ending. In the last few steps to my front door, I decided to top off this crazy day with a crazy question of my own.

“Hey Emerick?” I asked as we reached the step.

“Yeah?” he responded, distractedly scanning the perimeter.

“Luke won’t be done with practice for another couple hours. After that, he’s going out for burgers with his friends,” I spoke quickly before I could lose my nerve. “Do you want to come in?”

His eyes locked on to mine, silent and searching, for a brief moment. I worried he might decline.

“Absolutely.”

His face split into that million-dollar, boyish-good-looks smile.

“Just so I can continue learning as much as I can before tomorrow,” I added. Although, I couldn’t help but return his grin with one of my own.

“Sam, whatever the reason,” he held open my door, “my answer will always be that I would love to spend more time with you.”

Shit. What had I just gotten myself into?

~

A short time later, I had poured us both a glass of wine and dragged Emerick to my office where I started going through documents and photos. We chatted and laughed while I showed him baby photos of Luke. Then, I got quiet as I pulled out my wedding album. I stared longingly at the man I would do anything to talk to again.

Emerick came up to look over my shoulder.

“You two made a lovely couple,” he said, quietly.

“Thank you,” I replied wistfully. “He was a great man. Some days it feels like just yesterday he was walking through our front door. Others it seems like a lifetime ago.”

“I think I understand that feeling,” was his soft reply.

I nodded in return.

“I don’t know how I’m going to say goodbye to this place tomorrow. My entire life feels like it’s in this house,” I told him, looking around.

“We can have everything brought to the Alpha’s Residence for you,” he reminded me.

We had discussed the logistics of getting everything packed up and moved. Apparently, the acting alpha resided in the “Alpha’s Residence” which was a house with extra security measures near the pack house. Emerick was pretty vague on the details, but I was picturing something like the White House. I hoped it was less ostentatious.

I shook my head, “It’s not so much the stuff. I designed every inch of this house and Travis’ company built it. Almost every happy memory I have of our family is here... It feels like I’m shutting the last door on his life when I leave.”

I surprised myself at my vulnerability. I rarely was so open with anyone, let alone someone who was basically a stranger. He was easy to talk to though, and he listened without judgment. I supposed I was searching for a lifeline to keep drowning in all that I had been through. He could be that for me, even if it was just for the afternoon.

“He will always be with you, Sam. And I think he would be damn proud of the life you’ve built.”

His tone was soft but his face was serious as his intense gaze met mine.

“I appreciate that,” I said with a sad smile. “It wasn’t always that way. After he died so suddenly, I was a wreck. I was lucky to have my parents help, or I don’t know if I would’ve been able to pull myself out of my grief. I was heartbroken.”

I paused looking at a few of the pictures on the shelf. I smiled at one of my dad, Travis, and Luke on a fishing dock. They had loved to spend weekends on the lake together. I remember looking at the three of them and being so thankful for the role models in Luke’s life.

“That’s probably why I know in my heart, despite everything, I’ll be able to forgive my dad. And that I can trust him.”

“I don’t know exactly why he kept so much from you or what life was like when he lived with Emilia and Stephen, but I do know that Emilia has never forgiven Stephen’s infidelity,” Emerick spoke cautiously. “I can imagine having the product of his affair in their home did not make for a positive living situation. I’m sure it made any chance at happiness extremely difficult for Elias.

“What I do know is that even with his limited contact, your dad is a respected man amongst the pack. He was a formidable warrior when he trained and he dove headlong into learning about the pack history and politics. William told Christian that Elias could be a trusted resource if needed when Christian took over as alpha.”

It was still difficult to grasp that Dad had a secret life away from our family. I wondered how much my mom already knew. They had never seemed to have secrets. I couldn’t imagine Kaitlyn had any idea or she definitely would have told me. We were best friends. I felt a pang of sadness at the possibility of not getting to let her be as involved in this new life as I wanted.

“Thank you for that,” I finally told Emerick, “I value his advice so I’m glad to hear William feels he can be trusted.”

I would need as many werewolves I knew I could trust around me as possible. Right now, there weren’t many. I was at the stark disadvantage of not knowing the people I was supposed to be leading. Emerick had given me a brief overview of the current inner circle, but I would either have to choose to keep those members or replace them.

“Emerick, the odds seem stacked against me,” I confided, “I don’t know how anyone is expecting me to succeed.”

“Well I can tell you this,” he started and I looked to meet his gaze, “We believe the moon goddess hand picks every alpha. Each of you are destined for the role even if it doesn’t always seem clear.”

I nodded but looked down. I heard him get up and move to stand next to me.

He lifted my chin to meet his eyes as he said, “And Sam? She’s never made a mistake. You may not feel ready. You may be overwhelmed, but the pack already loves you. I’m not saying that every single person is going to welcome you with open arms, but to us the ‘pull’ is a real, tangible thing. As real as the air we breathe. The entire pack is drawn to follow your leadership.”

“I’ll try to remember that,” I murmured.

“Besides, you already took control of a room full of the most dangerous wolves in the pack. Two of which were former alphas. You may not grasp what that means yet, but most dominant wolves are used to getting what they want,” he continued, “They definitely did not want you leaving the pack and spending another night as a normal human.”

“Okay, you’ve convinced me,” I teased, “I’ll be great at this. You all will be at my mercy by then end of the week.”

“That’s the spirit,” he flashed that smile and my heart skipped a beat. He reached over and grabbed a paper off a stack I had put on my desk. “Now let’s get to work. You keep way too much junk mail. A water bill from two years ago is not necessary documentation.”

“Hey! You never know when you’re going to need it,” I smiled and tried to snatch the paper back.