The She-Wolf Alpha (Book 1 She-Wolf Series)

Samantha

Of course. The first guy that I open myself up to since Travis turns out to be a complete douchebag. Maybe. I wasn’t sure.

I felt completely confused, and so devastatingly sad. He had told me that he slept around this morning, but he had said there was never anything serious.

The last thing I expected was the letter I found on my desk. It was three pages that outlined every detail of Celeste and Emerick’s relationship. I could see where she had thought they were or could be something. It was definitely clear why she was so hurt by the fact that he had apparently chosen to be serious with me. I knew why she had thrown in the tidbits about what he said before we met, and about how she was who he called after the challenge. She wanted me to be as hurt as she was.

And it worked.

The problem was, I didn’t know whether I could trust Emerick’s intentions now. He had always seemed sincere and to some extent he had been honest about his past. Maybe it was an issue of how Celeste viewed their relationship like Emerick said.

At the end of the day, I couldn’t see how he would be using me as Alpha. He hadn’t pushed me to make any decisions or asked for anything. In fact, I had all but fired him from his job as beta and he took it with as much grace as could be expected. That didn’t mean there wasn’t an ulterior motive that I hadn’t figured out yet.

I let myself have a good cry, and then decided I needed to pull it together. I was the goddamn alpha of the Redclaw Pack. It was about time I acted like it. After fixing my makeup and tying my hair back, I was ready to proceed with my meetings as scheduled.

It was actually nice to be working again. I met the six members of my council, and I liked all of them. They each oversaw a different sector of the pack’s business and well being. Christian had chosen people who were passionate and knowledgeable in their field. I was concerned there may be some who had negative feelings about my being alpha but each seemed genuinely excited to work under my leadership.

As the day wound down, my earlier depression crept back in. I hadn’t seen Emerick the entire day. It had been what I asked for but that didn’t mean it didn’t take its toll. We had spent almost every minute together since I got here, and I had no other real friends.

I stayed late in my office going through paperwork. I told Jessica to go home and that I was catching up on some things. Truthfully, I was avoiding going to the suite to spend the night alone but there was plenty to keep me busy. Although the council had kept much of the pack business rolling along, without a clear leader some items had gotten behind. Even so, eventually I had to call it quits.

It was late when I buzzed into the door of my apartment. I kicked off my heels and made my way over to the kitchen. I hadn’t eaten dinner, and I didn’t know of any restaurants that would deliver to the pack house, let alone at this hour. I hoped against hope that maybe the staff kept some nonperishables stocked in the suites. When I opened the fridge, I was shocked to find a bag of takeout with a note.

“In case you got caught up and needed something to eat,” it read, “I love you even if you hate me, Em.”

He had picked a variety of dishes from a Chinese place I had never heard of. I assumed he wasn’t sure what I would like so he had tried to pick a decent range of options. It was so thoughtful that I once again had tears in my eyes and the back of my throat burned. I wanted to call him and apologize, maybe beg him to come stay the night with me because I didn’t want to be alone, but then I thought of Celeste’s letter.

Ayisha whined as I sank on the couch with a plate of food I heated up.

‘I know,’ I told her.

‘A wolf needs a pack,’ she said.

‘I have a pack.’

‘You are leading a pack,’ she argued, ‘That’s not the same thing.’

I knew what she meant. I had left my family back in the city. I couldn’t even call my girl friends back home because I had agreed to give up my old life. This new situation was too much to explain anyway. I was trying to make new friends, but I didn’t have anyone else that I had gotten close with yet. There was no one I could rely on here. No one that I was willing to call at that moment anyway. Sighing, I leaned back and felt tears start to trail down my cheeks. It was going to be a long night.

~

The next morning I vowed to have a better day. Upon getting into the office, I checked the status of the team setting up Emilia’s house arrest. Although there were still a couple boxes to check off, everything would be in place within a couple days. Once she was officially set up in her new “home”, I would have Luke and my parents move to pack lands. Jonathan informed me that the security team was ready, and that the movers would go pick up our things as soon as I made the call.

I called Luke and my parents to let them know. Luke was ecstatic. He was going stir crazy, and was excited to get started at the werewolf high school. Mom sounded nervous, but overall ready for us to be reunited. Dad had a million questions about my security detail and scenarios he felt they should be trained for. He seemed unconcerned with the move, but I could tell he was less than thrilled. Nevertheless it would be nice to have some familiar faces around.

As the day wore on, I decided it was time to finalize another decision that had been weighing on my mind. I hit the intercom button to page Jessica.

“Hey, Jessica? Can you call Michael Stevens to my office please?”

“Of course, Alpha,” she responded.

A few minutes later, Michael walked in, stone cold as ever.

“Good afternoon, Michael,” I said, cheerfully.

“Alpha Paulson,” he said, bowing his head.

“Have a seat please,” I gestured to the chair across my desk.

He grunted and settled in.

“I’ll cut right to the chase,” I started, “I want you to be my beta.”

He didn’t say anything at first, instead considering what I had just said.

“Alpha Paulson, I’m honored to be considered, but I’m not sure I’m qualified for the job,” he said, finally.

“I disagree,” I shook my head, “You graduated top of your class at the pack high school and went to Berkeley after that. In three years you received a Master’s degree in political sciences as well as a Bachelor’s in psychology. Then you were accepted into a doctorate program at Stanford, but you turned it down to return to the pack. You climbed the ranks among the Pack Enforcers and have been in charge for five years where you are highly respected. Not one person I could find over there had a negative thing to say about you.” I paused.“So tell me what I’m missing.”

“Do you know why I turned down the doctorate program at Stanford?” He asked. I gave him a questioning look and he continued, “My dad isn’t a werewolf. He and my mom met while she was attending college. Lots of werewolves are encouraged to pursue degrees off pack lands so that we expand our knowledge as well as learn how to work among humans. They fell in love, and he moved back here with her.

“I was born first and obviously I’m a werewolf, but my little sister isn’t. It can be hard to grow up among the wolves when you aren’t one, especially once the teenage years hit. With all the hormones floating around, plus the first shift, it’s a recipe for disaster.”

I nodded.

Although Luke was a level headed kid, he could be extremely headstrong. There were times that I questioned my own sanity while arguing with him. I could imagine once he shifted and found his wolf, it would be that much harder to control him.

“It can also be extremely unsafe for human females. A she-wolf can defend herself to some extent, but a human is a sheep among lions. Everyone left Stella alone because I was always there to protect her. I made sure everyone knew the consequences of messing with her. I checked in on her often when I was away, and all seemed to be going well. She was getting ready to graduate high school when I was making plans for Stanford.”

He stared off and I could tell his mind was somewhere else.

“So why didn’t you end up at Stanford, Michael?” I asked when he didn’t continue.

He sighed, “Stella called me one night, beside herself in a panic. It was hard to understand what she was saying, but I could piece together enough. She had been attacked by a group of boys she knew from school. They raped her.”

He kept his tone even, but I could see the torment he felt. I stayed silent, giving him the chance to find his words.

“I took the first flight home. Stella was completely broken. My parents were devastated. They tried to get her help, but Stella refused to leave the house. She was terrified of encountering another wolf. Eventually, they decided it would be better to send her to live with my father’s family. That way, she had a chance at a normal life where she could feel safe.

“I figured it was just a matter of time before the Enforcers found the men responsible, but Stella refused to talk. Her attackers had threatened her. Although there were rumors, those accused denied it and there was no hard evidence to trace them. It became a sort of open secret among the pack.

“So I joined the Enforcers to hunt them down myself. If I dedicated my time, I was sure I would find something. Alpha William Redding refused to banish them without solid evidence, and I kept hitting brick wall after brick wall. Without Stella pointing the finger, they were going to get off scot free, and I couldn’t live with that.

“One night I called her. I told her if she didn’t want to testify that was fine, but I needed to know who and what happened. She argued at first, but eventually she told me everything. She begged me to let it go. Told me she had moved on and I should too. I couldn’t, though.”

He trailed off. His entire body was tense, his jaw set. Even now, he looked murderous.

“It was a group of four guys. Sure they had to deal with the rumors, but they were all living normal lives. My sister still wouldn’t leave the house after dark and jumped at the slightest noise, while they were moving on. So I did what I felt I had to, and I hunted each one of them down. Just like them, I left no trace. And just like them, I continued my life like nothing happened.”

“Why are you telling me now, then?” I asked.

He met my gaze before answering, “You asked why I wasn’t qualified. It was an open secret what they did to my sister, and because of that and my standing with the Enforcers it became an open secret who had killed them. Their families tried to get justice for their lives, but lots of people looked the other way, including Alpha Christian Redding. I don’t think I’m a very good diplomatic option. If you haven’t noticed, I’m not the warm and friendly type either.”

I smiled at the last bit. I had known pretty much everything he told me of course. It was all in Christian’s files. I had done my homework before making my decision. I wanted to know whether he would tell me because he had never outright admitted anything. Christian made it clear that had Michael made what he did known, Christian would’ve had him arrested in order to prevent the pack thinking vigilantism was acceptable.

“You say that because of what you did, you wouldn’t be the right option,” I told him. “But I say that what you did makes you the perfect option. I don’t need someone to hold hands and kiss babies, Michael. I can do that myself. I need someone that is going to protect those he cares about - those that I care about - by any means necessary.”

He gave me a calculated look, considering my words. I figured he would argue my choice. He didn’t seem like the type that enjoyed the spotlight.

“You have a security force to protect you and your family,” he said, finally.

“Sure,” I agreed, “But I want anyone who thinks about threatening me to know that you are my right hand. On top of that, I was extremely impressed by the advice you gave me the other night, and from everything the Enforcers say, you are a magnificent leader.”

I leaned forward with my hands folded on my desk and waited until he looked in my eyes.

“I want someone who is going to do what he feels is right, regardless of the consequences.”

I could see him working to come up with an argument.

Apparently not finding one he asked, “Can I have the night to think about it? I need to talk to Cass.”

“Fine,” I told him, “I want an answer in the morning.”

As he got up to leave, I called after him, “This conversation never happened by the way. There will never be another word about it. When you do accept, I want you to appoint your replacement and hand over responsibility of the Enforcers. You start Monday.”

He nodded once without turning around and then continued his way out of my office.

I sighed. At least that was one item on my checklist almost complete. I needed a break, so I grabbed my jacket and walked into the hallway. My intention was to go sit out by the pond and think about what I was going to do on the Emerick and I front.