The Sentinel of Cassendar: Resquarian

Chapter 34



Dracia believed she had spent about five days in the winter palace though she couldn’t be sure. Time seemed to be moving in strange ways for her. Sometimes the hours would creep by as she was confined to her room, left to do nothing but stare blankly at her fire or sleep. Other times her days would fly by as she sat with Belleth and Julian while they somehow showed her scenes from another woman’s life, they claimed was hers.

The scenes did have a sense of familiarity to her. Every smell, taste, and conversation seemed as though they brought her back to a place she had forgotten long ago. Belleth and Julian had said they were Ricardia and Alvina, goddess of long ago who were in charge of power and knowledge. They had said Dracia was their sister, Sophia, the god of wisdom, reborn. The showed her times when the three sisters were happy together as they worked with the created ones to make new villages and alliances. They showed her how Dracia could give out the gift of wisdom to new babies, blessing their minds with good sense, open to listening to the knowledge they would learn.

As Dracia saw the scenes in her head, she had to admit it was very intoxicating. She could feel some power inside of her begin to awaken as she learned more and more about Sophia and the life she lived as a goddess. Dracia had begun to feel the bond she had with Belleth and Julian. It was almost as if she could remember a time when she had loved for them and cared for them when in truth, she hardly knew them.

She really only knew Belleth as a cruel woman who overpowered others with magic and tricks. Dracia watched as Fannar walked around in a daze, being controlled by Belleth and even Lilith. Dracia remembered how King Rommel had become cruel and distant because of what Belleth and even Julian had done to him. She thought of the pain, confusion, and loneliness Queen Lyvia must have felt due to her isolation in the summer palace. She remembered seeing Leal kiss Lilith against his will, and how it broke her heart.

She kept reminding herself that Belleth was evil, and Julian was not what she seemed. Behind her kindness and sweet words, Julian was a woman who had done horrible things to the people Dracia loved and cared for. As she felt herself pulled deeper and deeper into some kind of bond with the two women, Dracia kept trying to remind herself of the realty she knew.

Then there were the dreams that came to her each time she slept. They were not unpleasant dreams, but they were confusing. She would dream of a man named Theirry and the love she felt for him. She would dream of kissing him, spending days with him, and even loving him. Many times, Theirry would turn to Leal in her dreams, and she would awaken feeling as though she had spent the night in Leal’s arms. She swore sometimes she could still feel his kiss upon her lips. She could almost hear him whisper her name in the moments she would first wake up. It reminded her that she wanted nothing more than to be safe with him back in their room.

Dracia lay in the bed in the early morning, rubbing her hand over her stomach. The early mornings were when she felt the most like herself. If she had been able, she would have figured out some way to try to escape early one morning. She would have moved herself through the stone walls, or blasted her way to freedom, hoping she could take down enough guards and soldiers to find her way into the woods, and somehow get back to Lanoxan. She would try if it were only her safety and health to worry about, but she had her child to protect.

The child in her kept her where she was, waiting to see what was happen. She would do nothing to jeopardize Leal’s child. She already loved the girl or boy within her, feeling protective over the child. She could endure much if it meant one day soon her child would be born healthy. She rubbed her stomach and cursed her stupidity for the hundredth time. How could she not have known she was with child? Her mother had told her all the signs. She should never have ridden into the battle. She should have stayed behind as hard as it would have been. She could have stayed in the palace and kept her child safe.

Still, even within the palace she knew Belleth would find a way to get to her. Belleth seemed desperate for Dracia to do something for her, though Dracia didn’t know what it was yet. She had hoped to find out soon so she could either use it to barter for her freedom, or at least make sure her child would be given to his or her father. She would do almost anything to save her child.

Her door opened in her room, and Julian walked in as usual with a tray. She smiled at Dracia her kind, green eyes sparkling in the morning light that came through the window.

“How are you feeling this morning, dear one?” asked Julian as she placed the tray next to Dracia.

“Not as sick this morning,” said Dracia as she sat up and looked at the food. “I am actually very hungry.”

“Good, then eat up and take your drink, and we can get started on our day. Belleth wants to see you early today,” said Julian as she sat down on the bed close to Dracia.

“Do I have to take the drink?” asked Dracia as she took a bite of food. “I do not plan on going anywhere, not with my child’s wellbeing to think about. That drink makes it hard for me to think. I do not like feeling as though I can’t remember all of my days.”

“I know it is hard, but it is for the best,” said Julian. “I have a feeling if all goes to plan today, this might be the last day of the drink. You might even get free reign of the palace,” said Julian happily. “I would so love it if you and I could find time to spend together, just us. We used to be so close.”

She reached up and moved Dracia’s hair out of her face, keeping her hand on Dracia’s cheek. “You are so very lovely, dear one, but you always have been. I think even Barin was overtaken by our beauty at times. He did seem to favor you over Ricardia and me.”

Dracia wasn’t sure of an appropriate response, so she continued on eating her breakfast. After she was done, Julian put the cup of light brown liquid in her hand, and Dracia looked at it for a long moment before looking up at Julian. She gave Dracia a nod, and Dracia drank it quickly, immediately feeling her head become cloudy and her eyes heavy.

Julian helped her to dress in a simple Navalian gown of light blue. Julian sat her down and brushed her hair as she hummed softly. Dracia almost fell asleep as Julian pulled up half of her hair and pinned it up.

“There you are, dear one,” said Julian as she patted Dracia’s shoulders, waking her up. “We should be going to Belleth’s rooms. She wants us to see her in there.”

Dracia nodded and stood as Julian took Dracia’s arm and smiled at her, escorting her from her room and to the end of the hall where the double doors were located that led to Belleth’s tower. Julian put her hand on the door and closed her eyes. When she opened them, the doors opened, and she took Dracia up the stairs and to another door where she knocked. The door opened and Belleth smiled at them both.

“Good morning,” she said brightly. “Please come in. We have much to discuss today.”

Dracia walked in with Julian into the circle room she had been once before when she snuck into it with Ethen and Roderick. She felt a pain in the pit of her stomach thinking of the two men she held dear in her heart, especially Roderick. She hated that she had quarreled with him before she left. It was hard to regret keeping in safe by having him stay in Winsdell, but she had missed him in the battle She desperately missed him now. They hadn’t spent any real time apart in the past seven years they had known each other. In some areas of her life, he was her other half. She could never have asked the gods for a better second or friend. She hoped she got to see him again so she could apologize for the pain and confusion she had caused him. Besides being with Leal forever, the things she wanted most was for him to be happy.

“Now come take a look at this book, dear Dracia and see what you can make of it,” said Belleth as she took Dracia’s hand and led her to a table in which a large book was open.

Dracia walked up to the book as Belleth let go of her hand. She stared down at the book and could feel it was not some ordinary book. She could almost feel the memories and powers coming off of it. She could hear it whispering to her in a language she could not speak, but for some reason could understand.

“What is this?” Dracia asked as she kept her eyes on the book.

“It is a record of our memories,” said Belleth. “All three of our memories, a journal of sorts written by magic and sealed with the bond we all three share. It will tell you all you need to know.”

Dracia lifted her hand to touch the book, but she was afraid. She didn’t want her life to change, and she had a dreadful feeling if she touched the book, she would never be the same. The book called to her and the draw was irresistible. She could not deny giving it what it wanted, and it wanted her to touch it, to understand it. She laid her hand on the open page and closed her eyes. She was immediately transported to a different place and time.

“Sophia, you have so much power in you,” said Ricardia as she walked by her sister over the green hills of Winsdell. “I don’t understand how or why you have even more than me, but you do. You cannot tell me you do not enjoy the feeling.”

“I was given the same powers as you, sister, but I have used my time more wisely, learning what it truly means to hold this power. I know what the boundaries should be for what I can do even if none have to exist. You have never learned them. You only know what you want and see if you can do it without considering if it is wise and good for you and the created ones,” said Sophia as she stopped and looked at her sister.

“The created ones were made for our pleasure, sister. What I do with them is really no concern, there are always new ones being made after all,” said Ricardia with a laugh.

“What an awful thing to say, sister. They were not created for our pleasure. They were created to cultivate this land and give life to the world Barin made. We are here for their guidance and support. They are not playthings for you or me, and you should remember it,” said Sophia, sternly.

“Now that you have Barin’s ear, you think you can treat me and Alvina however you want,” said Ricardia.

“That is not true. I only speak to you as I think I should. Barin has decided things shall change in this land. Resquarian and its people will not be the same after what he has planned, and neither shall we,” said Sophia. “We shall have a choice that we must make.”

“And what choice is that, sister?” asked Ricardia.

“What we will do with our future,” said Sophia.

The light faded around Dracia and she was transported to another time in the same hills, though instead of summer, it was autumn as the grass was fading to brown and the wind was becoming cold.

“You cannot be serious, Sophia. This is madness,” said Ricardia. “We do not have to do as Barin says. What could he really do to us?”

“He is right in his thinking,” said Sophia. “The created ones need to start taking care of themselves. We have given them every gift we have. Now they must learn how to use them and pass them on to each other.”

“And the others are fine with this?” asked Alvina. “They are fine going somewhere by themselves to observe the created ones from far away?”

“They would not be by themselves forever, Alvie. Those who move on from this world will come and stay with them eventually, finding rest and new work in the place each god creates. If you choose to set up such a place for yourself, you would eventually be surrounded by those who cherish knowledge about all else,” said Sophia with a smile.

“But you will have no influence over them because their time of guidance would be over. They would be gone from this land, Alvina,” said Ricardia. “What use would a place full of those who love power be if there is nothing to truly be gained? What use is wisdom or even knowledge if you are truly at rest and know all the secrets of the land?”

“Perhaps you are right, sister, which is why I have found a different option,” said Sophia. “One I think will do well for all three of us.”

“What is it, Sophia?” asked Ricardia with skepticism.

“We could become like a created one. We could live a life, learning as they do. We could experience life in a new way with mercy and health. We could know what it truly means to die and move on. We could become changed creatures who want something more than wisdom, power, or knowledge after we pass,” said Sophia excitedly. “We could even know and experience love in ways we never thought possible.”

Ricardia narrowed her eyes. “This is about that Cassendar man, isn’t it? Don’t listen to her, Alvina. She is being selfish. She has grown fond of that man, and thinks she must have him in some way.”

“I have grown very fond of him,” said Sophia. “I love him, and I do want to be with him, but I would never put him above my sisters. I am telling you we should do this because it is the best way forward for all three of us. We will never be satisfied with trying to gain more wisdom, knowledge, or power in this world. We will never be satisfied trying to convince the created ones they need more of them. This will give us a chance to become more than we are now.”

“More than we are now?” asked Ricardia loudly. “Do you realize who we are? Do you not feel the power coursing through you, Sophia? How can you give it up? You are who you were meant to be now.”

Sophia shook her head.

“Listen to me, Sophie,” said Ricardia softly as she took Sophia’s arm. “Do not let your simple feelings for that man get in the way of what we are to each other, you, me, even Alvina. We are meant to be together in this land, seeing over the created ones forever. Can’t you feel the bond we all three have, the power we have together? If we stay together, there is nothing Barin or anyone else can do to us. We can go on as we have, and we can be happy.”

Sophia took a deep breath. “I do want to be happy, Ricardia. I want you and Alvie to be happy as well.”

“Then say you will forget this nonsense about becoming a created one or even going away. Say you will stay here with Alvie and me,” said Ricardia. “Tell her this is the right way, Alvie.”

Alvina was silent as she stared at her two sisters.

“Tell her, Alvie,” said Ricardia sounding angry. “You do not want to be parted from us, do you?”

“No, of course not,” said Alvina. “I want us to be together.”

“See, Sophie, now forget this nonsense.”

Dracia could feel the conflict inside of Sophia as though it was her own. She felt the love Sophia had for her sisters, and she felt he love she had for Theirry. She could feel Sophia’s power churning within her, reaching for her sisters, but also speaking to her, telling her the true way to go.

“Sophie,” said Alvina quietly. “Are you well?”

“I will be, sister,” said Sophia. “I know the right way to go, and I will do what is right.”

Ricardia smiled. “Then you will stay here with us as we are now.”

“No, sister, I will become what will make me who I should be, and who I want to be. I have told Barin I wish to become a created one, and I will not change my mind,” said Sophia. “I am telling you, you should do the same. If you do not, you will have to go away with the other gods to live in a new space, where I am afraid you will be miserable.”

“And what if I will not?” asked Ricardia.

“There is no other option, Ricardia. You must pick one of those two,” said Sophia.

“What if we do not?” asked Ricardia as she pulled Alvina close to her side.

“Then you will face a harsh consequence for your disobedience.”

Ricardia laughed. “What can Barin do to us?”

“It will not be Barin,” said Sophia sadly. “It will be me. If you will not follow the will of the other gods, then I will have to see you destroyed.”

“You could not do it,” said Ricardia.

“I can,” said Sophia. “I do not wish to do it, but I can. You were always tied to me and not I to you. Without me, you should not exist, therefore I can make sure you do not.”

Sophia turned from her sisters and composed herself. “I will give you three days to decide. You will either live as a created one, go up into a new heaven that will be created, or you will perish.”

Dracia kept her hand on the book. She felt as though she lived through Sophia’s agonizing three days. She wanted to see Theirry, but knew she must not be affected by her decision with her sister’s lives on the line. She needed to make the decision for herself if she was forced do as she truly believed she might have to if her sisters made a foolish choice. On the night before meeting with her sisters, Sophia broke down and went to Theirry. She knocked on the door of his large house, and he let her in.

“What is it, my love?” he asked as soon as she walked in and collapsed in his arms.

“I don’t know if I can do it, Theirry.”

“Do what?” he asked as he held her.

“What it takes to be with you. If my sisters will not agree to the new reality they face, I will have to see the end of them. I will have to make sure they are truly gone so they cannot affect the created ones. If they refuse to see reason and live as the other gods demand, I will have to see to their end.”

“Sophia,” said Theirry as he pulled her in front of him so he could look at her. “I would never ask you to do something you think is wrong, even if it means I have to let you go. I love you too much to see your miserable.”

She looked at him and saw the real love he had for her. She could look into his mind and see how he truly felt for her. He didn’t love her because of her power or her status. He loved her because of who she was despite all of it. He loved her because he thought she was humorous and kind. He thought she was beautiful inside and out, and he wanted to be with her whether she was a goddess or a created one.

“The only thing that would truly make me miserable would be not being with you,” she said as she leaned towards him.

He smiled and took her back into his arms and kissed her. Before long he picked her and took her to his room where he loved her. She had never truly experienced it before. She knew what it was, and how it was done, but to actually share such an experience with one who had her heart was beyond anything she could ever imagine. As she laid in his arms after, she knew what she had to do, though it hurt her heart.

She left him in the bed before sunrise and walked into the hills to find her sisters. They stood together by a large tree that only had a few of its dead leaves still on its branches.

“I hope you have seen reason, Sophia,” said Ricardia as Alvina trembled by her side.

“I am hoping the same for you,” said Sophia. “Will you turn, or will you go to your new heaven?”

“Neither,” said Ricardia. “I will stay here and live as I have, helping the created ones take power when It is necessary.”

“Don’t you see what you are doing is causing nothing but problems and pain? Your demand for more and more power is causing strife in the land where there need be none. You have wiped out small villages for no reason,” said Sophia.

“I have done away with the weak so the truly strong may prosper,” said Ricardia. “Even your Cassendar man has benefited from my gift of power.”

“Theirry may have power, but he has much wisdom, mercy, and kindness. He does not take with no reason as you would have him do. Your time in this world is over, Ricardia. You must move on one way or another.”

Ricardia laughed and shook her head. “What of you, Alvina? What will you do?” asked Sophia. “You could become like a created one with me. We could be sisters still, learning this life together.”

“What will happen to the created ones without the gift of knowledge, Sophie?” asked Alvina. “How could I leave them on their own?”

“Your gift will still be around, Alvie. The created ones will gain knowledge on their own, the ones who want to. You will not leave them without.”

“It is not the same. Now I can use my power to give them a thirst for knowledge, to help them to grow and change. Without me, they will not look for it. They will become dimwitted and careless. They need me, Sophia. They need all three of us.”

“So, you will choose the same fate as Ricardia?” said Sophia.

“She will, and there is nothing you can do,” said Ricardia.

Sophia closed her eyes and bowed her head. The wind picked up all around them, and Sophia let her power truly loose for the first time. She opened her eyes and looked at her sisters. “I give you one last chance, sisters. Will you change your mind?”

“We will not,” said Ricardia as she held onto Alvina’s hand.

Sophia raised her hand and looked down on her sisters. She looked at Ricardia’s hard stare, and Alvina’s tear filled eyes. They were her sisters, and she loved them. She could not destroy them. There had to be another way. Perhaps with more time, they would change their minds.

“I am sending you far north into the winterlands,” said Sophia with her hand raised. “You will stay there until the other gods see it fit to give you one last chance. I hope you will take the mercy I am giving you and use it to truly find your way. Goodbye, sisters, I hope we meet again one day.”

Dracia felt a hand on each of her arms. They pulled at her, and she stumbled back, finding herself in Belleth’s tower. Dracia steadied herself and looked at Belleth and Julian as they looked at her.

“You see now what a mistake you made,” said Belleth. “You threw away all we were just to be with some man. You became like a created one, lived and died and then there was nothing for you until now.”

“I have missed you so much, Sophia,” said Julian with a smile. “Now you are here with us, and we can be as we were before.”

“You do realize who you are now, don’t you?” asked Belleth. “You are truly Sophia, the goddess of wisdom. You know it.”

Dracia nodded, knowing it was true. Everything Sophia felt in that book, Dracia felt as well. She knew the memories were hers. She was truly Sophia, the sister of these two women. She felt weak, and she fell down to her knees. Julian reached for her but Belleth stopped her.

“You could have your power back, Sophia,” said Belleth as she kneeled down in front of Dracia. “You can become who you were, who you are meant to be. Your whole life you have been pushing yourself more and more, trying to gain power and skills, because even then your realized you were more than just some woman. You strove for perfection because you are meant to be perfect. You are meant to be a goddess.”

Dracia thought over her life, and the work she had put herself through. She thought how she was never satisfied with herself. Her skills, no matter how impressive, were never enough. Her leadership of the Sentinel was never what it should be. How she loved her friends was never as much as she wanted. How she supported Leal and loved him always made her feel like she fell short. Could it be that all along she was searching for her true self, to become the goddess she once was?”

“Yes, Sophie,” said Belleth as she took Dracia’s hand while Julian kneeled down next to Dracia as well, taking her other hand. “You know who you were meant to be. All you have to do is claim it. Say you want it, and I know a way to join us together again. Alvina and I have found away to make us the goddesses we once were.”

“We can be together again, Sophie. We can walk amongst the land and help our people. You can help those you love now, make them wiser as I give them knowledge,” said Alvina.

“I can make sure your king has all the power he wants,” said Belleth. “I could make your child the ruler of all with her Siccarian and Lanoxan blood. We can join the land back together. We can truly have Resquarian again, but this time we will do away with the weak, leaving only the strong. There will be no suffering as those who suffer will stand no chance.”

Dracia felt the pull to say yes. She could rejoin these woman, her sisters. She could live as a goddess, seeing over her people and her land. She could guide them all and keep them safe. She could see that Ethen and Maia were happy. She could see that Galen and Roderick were raised up as they should be with the women they loved. She could make sure no one ever hurt Leal.

She felt her tears fall as she realized all that was true, but if she chose to join these women, she could never be with all those she loved like she was now. She would be something else, not like them. She could not be Ethen’s kin or Roderick’s best friend. She could not love Leal as his wife, because to take her place as Sophia, she would have to let Dracia Cassendar die.

She thought back to Sophia’s story. She had chosen a new way for herself. She had chosen to lay down her power to become like the man she loved. Dracia closed her eyes and searched her long forgotten memories. She had chosen to live not as a goddess but as a woman. She saw herself getting married to Thierry. She saw as they had children together. Her daughter married one of the first High Nobles of Siccaria. She remembered every moment her and Thierry shared whether they were laughing, arguing, kissing, or loving one another. She found she did not regret any of them. She saw herself holding his hand as he passed on to the four heavens. She felt herself fading away, knowing she would be with him again.

Dracia did not have to become Sophia and take her place as a goddess. She could choose who she was, and who she wanted to be was Dracia Cassendar, the wife of King Leal Cassendar. She was a High Noble of Siccaria. She wanted to spend her life by Leal’s side as they raised their children and taught them to rule justly. She wanted to live her life laughing with Lexine, and walking around Winsdell with Roderick. She wanted to teach Galen more things, and travel to Siccaria to be with her family there periodically. She wanted to truly make peace with her father, and watch her brothers’ families grow.

“Sophia, you do understand what you have to do, don’t you?” asked Belleth.

And what was it Belleth said about only the strong surviving and doing away with the weak? Who was she or anyone else to decide who deserved to live or die? All the people of the land were of worth, and they should all have a chance at life.

Dracia took her hands away from the two women and stood up. “I know what I want to do because I know who I truly am,” said Dracia as she stood straight. “I am Dracia Cassendar, the Queen of Lanoxan, a High Noble of Siccaria, and the High Captain of the Sentinel of Cassendar. I will spend my life as a wife, mother, friend, and so much more. I do not choose to live as a goddess. I choose to live the life the gods have given me. I choose to help lead my people, all my people, not just those you might think are worthy, Belleth.”

“Don’t be foolish, Sophia,” said Belleth as she stood with Julian. “You cannot choose this again. You have a second chance, choose wisely.”

“I am not Sophia, and it is you who was given the second chance,” said Dracia, “But I can see you have done nothing but waste it. Your sister showed you mercy, but you refused to take advantage of it, both of you. I will not overturn your sister’s decision. I will choose for myself as she did.”

“You will not change your mind?” asked Belleth as she looked at Julian.

“I will not,” said Dracia.

“We will have to find a way to make you see then,” said Belleth as she threw out her hand. Dracia flew back into the wall, hitting it hard, causing her already weary head to feel even dimmer and muddled as she hung high on the wall as if held there by some invisible force.

Belleth dropped her hand, and Dracia fell to the floor on her side. He body crying out in pain as she landed on the hard stone. Belleth leaned down over her and placed her hand on her head. Dracia cried out as a sharp pain flew through her.

“We will start with putting you somewhere much less comfortable than you are accustomed to, your majesty,” said Belleth as she kept her hand on Dracia’s head, making Dracia feel as though she would die from the pain. “I will find ways to unleash your power. I will force your hand if I have to. I will begin collecting everyone you love, and killing them before you until you relent and give me what I want. If that doesn’t work, I will take you child from you, and make sure she is raised to know nothing but hate for you, because you took from her the wonderful future she should have had.”

Belleth pressed down harder on Dracia’s head until Dracia could not take the pain anymore and she saw only darkness. When she opened her eyes, she had no idea how much time had passed. For a moment she had trouble telling if her eyes were really open. Wherever she was, it was so dark and cold. The floor was hard stone that felt rough under her hands as she tried to push up. It took her a moment to realize her hands were bound again in iron shackles. This time there was a chain linked to her shackles that she followed in the dim light to find it attached to a stone wall.

She sat there for a moment and let her eyes adjust to the darkness around her. Above her was a very slim window that let in some moonlight. So, she had been asleep for a while as it was now night. Infront of her were bars placed very close together. She realized that where she was looked much like the holding cells below the Fortress. She must still be in the palace somewhere, kept in a place for prisoners.

Dracia felt herself tremble, and she wasn’t sure if it was from fear or cold. It was very cold, and she was wearing a flimsy Navalian dress that had plenty of fabric but no bulk. Her arms were almost completely bare. She hugged herself, leaning forward to try to find some warmth. She wished she could spark fire, but she felt so weak. There was so much pain in her body. Her head pounded, her back felt bruised, and her legs felt like they would never support her.

She put her bound hands on her stomach and sat up with a gasp. What about her child? Was she well? She knew there was no way for her to tell, not at this stage. She gently moved her fingers along her stomach, praying her child had not been harmed. What else could she do? Dracia heard the sound of an old creaky door opening somewhere to the left of her.

She looked and could see Julian walking towards her cell, a tray in her hand and some kind of dark material thrown over her arm. She was flanked by two palace guards. They all three stopped in front of Dracia, and Julian looked at her with sadness and pity.

“Open the cell, please,” said Julian as she looked at one of the guards.

The guard took a key from his belt and placed it in a lock on her cell. He turned it and opened the door, moving aside so Julian could enter.

“I have brought you some food, dear one,” said Julian as she bent down and placed the tray in front of Dracia. “And your cloak as well as I know you must be cold.”

Julian held out Dracia’s Sentinel cloak towards her. The silver clasp shone in the firelight of a torch one of the guards was holding. Dracia just looked up at Julian, saying nothing, and not moving. Julian grimaced and then leaned down, putting the cloak around Dracia.

“I do not want you to suffer, sister,” said Julian.

“Then help me leave this place,” said Dracia in a raspy voice. “Help me go back to those I love.”

“You know that isn’t possible,” said Julian. She paced Dracia’s cell for a moment. “You should eat. You child will need you to stay strong.”

Dracia looked down at the small amount of food in front of her. It didn’t look too bad, so she picked up some of it the best she could with her bound hands and ate while Julian watched her.

“Would it be so bad, sister? Would you not like to be back with Ricardia and myself? We could be close like we once were, and you could keep watch over Ricardia. I know she has done some awful things, but with you here now, you could keep her in check.”

“What about you?” asked Dracia. “You have done awful things as well. It was you who kept the queen medicated and controlled for so long. I even think you came and seduced the king once or twice.”

Julian sighed. “I never wanted to hurt that poor woman, and I didn’t really. I even helped her lungs a bit. She must breathe much easier now,” said Julian. “As far as the king goes, you must understand what it has been like for me, under the control of Ricardia. You know I could never stand up to her. How could I? She has so much power, and I have no wish for any kind of strife. It is not in my nature.”

“With all the knowledge you must hold, I would think you would understand right and wrong,” said Dracia as she looked up at Julian, feeling a power coming over her. The next words she spoke were not in her own language, but she could understand them.

“You offer flimsy excuses and want my pity, but you will not have it. I gave you more than enough time for you to learn the error of your ways and ask for help. Instead, you helped Ricardia because you wished for the same things she did. Now you will perish alongside her, and your evil ways will never taint this land again.”

Julian stepped back and stared at Dracia with fear. She took a shuddering breath and said, “You should drink the liquid in that cup. If you do not, Belleth will come and deal with you in a different way, and you will not like it.”

Dracia looked at the cup, seeing a large amount of the light brown liquid she had become familiar with. She picked it up and looked at Julian.

“Yes, drink it now, sister. She is coming,” said Julian.

Dracia stared at Julian and turned the cup over, letting all the liquid spill out on the stone floor before her as Julian shook her head.

“She is coming now. I am afraid you will pay for your mistake with pain, dear one” said Julian as she turned and walked out of Dracia’s cell.

The creaky door opened again, and Belleth walked up to the cell.

“Did she drink it?” asked Belleth loudly making Julian cower.

“No, she poured it out,” said Julian quietly as Belleth smiled.

“I told our simple sister you would be defiant, Dracia. This woman the gods have created for you is so stubborn, sister. I am surprise you have managed to live this long with all the mistakes you have made,” said Belleth. “Well, we can’t have you trying to escape. I am well aware of your skills even as human as you are. I can even feel you trying to put up a shield, but it will not work. You must feel how weak you are, and you have too much concern for the child within you, scared you might harm her somehow.”

Belleth held up her hand, and Dracia fell back on the floor, pain exploding through her body. “Do not fight it, Dracia, it will do you no good. It will only give you more pain,” said Belleth. “Of course, you could just relent and do as I ask. You could join us, and you would never feel pain again.”

“No,” said Dracia as she felt another wave of pain hit her.

“Very well,” said Belleth as Dracia felt the world around her go dark.

She wasn’t sure how long she lay there coming in and out of consciousness. She would awake to eat food that was sometimes brought to her by guards and sometimes by Julian. Once or twice, Julian even came with a couple of attendants and had Dracia washed as best as could be done. Julian would take time to brush Dracia’s hair and hum to tune to her. Before she would leave, she would kiss Dracia’s cheek and say nothing.

When food would come, Dracia would eat and then drink whatever was given to her, not wanting a visit from Belleth. Belleth did come sometimes. She would spend time causing Dracia pain, asking her to relent and join with her and Julian. When Dracia would refuse, she would become angry, and eventually Dracia would again be plunged into darkness.

At one point, Fannar found his way to her somehow. He leaned against the bars and stared at her as she lazily looked up at him from the floor, feeling as though talking to him would take great effort.

“Why are you down here, Dracia?” he asked with much confusion. “This isn’t right. You do not look well.”

She tried to prop herself up to talk with him, but she felt her arms could not support her, so she just looked up at him from where she was.

“I will call the guards in and get you out,” he said as he pushed off of the bars. “This is some kind of mistake.”

“It is not a mistake, brother,” said Lilith as she walked up to him. “She must pay for her crimes. She killed the king, our father. You were there, Fannar. You saw what she did. Now, she must be held accountable.”

“What will happen to her?” asked Fannar.

“She will stay here until she is read to cooperate with Lady Belleth. Then she might get some kind of reprieve. Though I would rather she just perish where she is,” said Lilith with a small laugh. “Come on, Fannar, you do not need to be down here. Stay away from her as she will tell you nothing but lies.”

Dracia closed her eyes before they even left the hall in front of her. She lived this way for she wasn’t sure how many days. She didn’t know how she would stand it much longer, but she was trained to endure pain and suffering. She called upon her training when she was lucid, thinking over the ways the Sentinel had taught her to resist torture. She repeated words drilled into her when she was a novice.

“My glory is the Sentinel’s glory. My failure is the Sentinel’s failure,” she whispered over and over. “The Sentinel stands true because the High Captain is strong and just.”

She had to remain strong for her people, for her kingdom, for those she loved, and for her child. She could withstand anything as long as somehow her child remained safe, and those she loved were well. Sometimes she wondered if they would ever come for her. She knew Leal had been badly hurt, but she knew Roderick would not leave her here. At least she didn’t not believe he would. She had un-named him and hurt him, but she believed him too good to leave her where she was. She dreaded him coming for her and hoped for it as well. She did not want him in danger, but she prayed he would find a way to come get her out safely. Surely, he would not abandon her. If there was any way to help her, she had to believe Roderick would find it.

“Dracia, you will need to wake up,” said Lady Belleth as she came to walk in front of Dracia’s cell.

Dracia opened her eyes and sat up as best she could, wondering what the woman wanted with her now.

“I am about to be off for a few days into the land to see to my forces and visit my allies so I can attack your village, take your king, and destroy all you love,” said Lady Belleth. “I would rather not do it as it will take much time and effort To save your kingdom and yourself from all this pain all you have to do is relent. Say you will join me and my sister and be as we all should, and I will leave your kingdom in peace. I will not hurt your king or your kin in Siccaria.”

“How could I trust that is true once you have your full powers?” asked Dracia in a harsh whisper. “You have already told me you wish the weak to perish. I don’t think I wish to know how you judge what qualifies a person as weak.”

“So, you will just let your king suffer and die?” asked Belleth as she stared at Dracia.

“You think it will be so easy to kill Leal or take my kingdom? You underestimate his power and the will of my people,” said Dracia.

“You know I have been wondering why no one has come for you, yet. It has been almost two weeks since you were taken, plenty of time for a force to make it here. Why do you think they have left you? Has your king given up on you? Has your Sentinel turned on you?” asked Belleth. “You defend your people, Dracia, but where are they when you need them?”

Dracia shook her head and tried not to listen. She knew Belleth was just trying to get her to lose hope. She just wanted Dracia to think all had forsaken her so she would turn to Belleth.

“You have nothing to say to it?” asked Belleth with a smile. “I am going to go prepare with my dear sister, Dracia, and when I get back, I will give you one more chance. Don’t worry about being alone. I will make sure you have company while we are gone. There is one here who particularly wishes to speak with you. I believe you know him very.”

Belleth held her hand up and laughed as Dracia felt pain and darkness overtake her.

The next night she woke up feeling even more tired and, in more pain, than usual. She looked over to see someone had left food for her, but she could not muster up any appetite. She knew she needed to eat, but at the moment she could not do it. She instead lay there, listening to some water dripping in the distance as she tried to wrap her cloak around her tighter, hanging on to any warmth it could give her. She had almost fallen back asleep when she heard a voice that made her stomach turn.

“High Captain, I was told by Lady Belleth to come see you,” said Darron from outside of her cell. “I should have visited you sooner, but I hope you will excuse my absence until now.”

Dracia opened her eyes and rolled over so she could look at him. He sneered at her from just outside of her cell.

“You don’t look as bad as I thought you might,” said Darron as he pulled a key ring off of his belt. “Lady Belleth is concerned you are lonely while she is gone. She has asked me to spend some time with you. I told her I wouldn’t mind. I have long thought about things you and I could do together.”

Dracia found a way to sit up, scooting to the back of her cell slowly. “I have no desire for your company, Darron,” said Dracia with a raw voice “I have never enjoyed being in your presence.”

“I am not sure I believe that, Captain,” said Darron as she opened her door. “Many woman have told me I am very entertaining.”

“Like your princess?” asked Dracia as she leaned against the back wall. “Why don’t you go entertain her and leave me be?”

“I am bored with Lilith,” said Darron. “She is not a challenge. She never has been. She practically threw herself at me last summer in Winsdell. I am not one to ignore such low hanging fruit when it is so delectable, but over time one craves something more exotic, something much more rare.”

“Do you always do as Lady Belleth tells you, Darron?” asked Dracia. “I suppose she is controlling you as well.”

“You mean as she controlled King Rommel and even your prince? You think she keeps me subdued like King Fannar?” asked Darron with a slight laugh. “No, Captain, I think for myself and make decisions. I had more than just Princess Lilith come visit me in Winsdell. You did not see her, but Lady Belleth was around. She visited me periodically, and what she said made sense. The Cassendars have done nothing but cause the downfall of Lanoxan. You would eventually cause the end of the Sentinel, and I, as a second son of a lord would never have the chance of glory and the place of leadership I was meant for. You saw to that when you accepted your place as High Captain.

“Belleth offered me a way to save Lanoxan and give me what I craved. I now lead her forces, and soon we will take over Lanoxan and then Siccaria. The land will be united as it was always meant to be. There will be no wars after this, perhaps fewer will go hungry or die of some sickness.”

“You think you are being noble following Belleth? You think you are doing this for the greater good?”

Darron laughed again. “Well, yes and no. I find I could care less about most people, but it does sound better to say it will be better for most. What I really care about is what I want, and how to get it. So far Belleth has helped me get all I want.”

He walked into her cell and knelled down in front of her. “Have you even been touched by anyone except your king? Did Roderick ever manage to have his way with you?” asked Darron as he ran a finger down one of her cheeks. “If I had been as close to you as he was, I think I would already know you very well.”

She pulled away from him, wishing she could muster of up any power to do away with him quickly. She hated feeling so powerless against this man. “Roderick is honorable and a good man. You could never understand him. He would never do anything to hurt or dishonor me.”

Darron laughed. “I believe you could do with some dishonoring, Captain. You must know it is highly unlikely you will ever see your king again unless it is to witness his death. He cannot win this war against Lady Belleth. You must know of her power.”

Dracia narrowed her eyes. “You have no idea of the power of my king or the people of Lanoxan, and you have no idea of what I am truly capable of. When I am free from here, I will protect my kingdom and see that you and all the traitors of the Sentinel are dealt with.”

Darron laughed again as he grabbed her by the back of her head with one hand while using the other to pull her body close to his. “You are something, Captain. You are very wrong, but I do enjoy your passion. I have always thought you were a passionate woman, and I should like to know what it is to love a queen.”

He pulled her forward as she resisted, not wanting any part of him to touch her. He held her tighter, pulling her harder so she was up against him. She felt some power within her wanting to be unleashed, but she held it back. She had a feeling if she let that power out, it would be the start of the end of Dracia Cassendar. She panicked as Darron looked down at her, his breath on her face.

She could not let him do this, but what could she do? She was so weak, and tired. His hands moved to places to touch her that she tried not to think about as he leaned forward.”

“This doesn’t seem like you,” said Dracia as he stopped and looked at her. “You are a lot of things, Darron, but you are not this. You say she is not controlling you, but look at what you are doing. She knows my deepest fears. She knows I cannot stand losing control or feeling weak. She sent you down here in hopes I would release my power to end you. Do not play into her game.”

He shook his head. “I am afraid it is too late for it,” said Darron as he moved in to kiss her, his hand sliding under her skirt.

She closed her eyes, trying to imagine she was anywhere but there in that moment, trying to keep her power within. Just as his lips touched hers, a guard called out to him, causing him to pull back with a groan.

“Sir, you are needed upstairs,” said the guard as he walked over.

“Whatever for? Can’t you see I am busy with this prisoner,” said Darron as he kept his hands on Dracia.

“I think you better come sir. I believe someone has broken into the palace,” said the guard.

“It is probably nothing,” said Darron. “We have guards covering every door and wall.”

“Princess Lilith is asking you come directly,” said the guard.

Darron growled as he let go of Dracia. She fell back against the wall, relief flowing through her body. Darron looked down at her as he stood up.

“Don’t worry, High Captain, I will come back for you soon. I hate seeing you so alone down here. Perhaps I will make my visits a regular thing. I am sure we have much to speak about,” said Darron with a wide smile.

Dracia slid down the wall as he walked out and closed her cell door. She curled up on her side, pulling her cloak around her as though it could protect her, letting the comfort of sleep envelope her.


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