SWNOVELS Chapter 28
**MATURE CONTENT**
IZZY
The whole day went by in a blur at the café.
I only had to work till six, and then Alice came to do the evening shift.
I returned to the house, feeling tired but anxious about the next day.
Tomorrow I would be spending some time with Blake, or as Kat calls it a date.
This is not going to be easy.
I woke up with the sun blaring through my window straight onto my face. I scrunch up my face and look over at the clock.
nine am.
I sighed
I know Puna is sleeping as I can hear her light snores in my head.
I get up, and get myself ready for the day and for Blake to arrive.
When I’m done, I walk downstairs to find Alice, Paul, and Kat sitting around the counter.
“Morning all!” I said, sounding cheerful.
I knew what the looks I was getting but I choose to take no notice as I knew where their heads are at.
I poured myself a mug of coffee and turned around to face everyone.
“You seem happy," Alica said with a smirk.
I didn't say anything.
“Well, whatever it is. Blake was all smiles too this morning,” Paul said but I couldn’t help the blush that crept on my cheeks which earned a laugh from everyone even from Puna who thought it was funny. Her laughter fills my head.
Once we all ate, everyone headed to the café for their shifts.
“Izzy,” Puna said, “I think you should tell Blake about Michael and Allie.”
Not this again
“I know you are scared, but mate will be fine with it. You see,” she said feeling confident.
I won’t hold my breath just yet but if this date, I mean walk, goes well then I maybe will but I have to be completely honest I am scared and I can feel the pain rush through as some of the thoughts come swooping into my head.
“Stop overthinking, Izzy,” Puna said, purring in my head.
Before I could comment, there is a knock at the door.
I sighed and go to open it; there standing as handsome as ever was Blake.
I have to admit he looked really good.
Blake was wearing jeans and a t-shirt with sneakers, his hair looked good gelled back and his brown eyes were looking at me. Well, he looked me up and down which was a little freaky but also kind of nice.
“Are you done checking me out,” he said, with a smirk.
What? I wasn’t!
“Yes you were,” says Puna, giggling loudly in my head.
I couldn’t help but blush.
Why the hell am I blushing all the time? I have never done that before.
Right on cue, “He’s our mate” Puna said. “He’s checking you out now too,” giggling once again.
“Can you stop looking at me please?” I said, getting a little flustered. “You are not helping the situation; Puna is a horny cat as it is without you giving her any ideas.”
I blush more but he smiled.
“Yeah, I know the feeling Axel is the same,” he said, laughing.
“Well let’s go then,” he said, holding out his hand to me.
I look at it and take it.
He smiled.
The tingles are there again but I don’t want to remove my hand from his.
We walk around and play twenty questions even though I haven’t said much about myself to him as I am trying to figure out what to say. But I did learn some interesting things about him, like how much he likes to play the guitar, and training and his favorite color is orange.
Puna loves all the attention that Blake is giving us. She has been purring nonstop in my head ever since he turned up.
We walked around and I noticed that we are not in the town. We are close to the pack house. I start to panic as I don’t want to run into anyone here, especially Graham or his mate.
Blake looked at me with concern.
“It’s okay, no one is here. Everyone has been told to leave and I believe Graham is with my father on pack business while my mother is out with Linda,” he said and smiled.
“What about Dale and Kacey?” I asked, “Where are they?”
“Kacey is at their house at the moment working on something for me and Dale is training with some new pack members,” he said.
We only have to walk a few yards and I can see the pack house. It is a huge townhouse. It looks so out of place here but also it looks big enough to hold loads of people.
We head inside and I can’t get over it, there seem to be more rooms in here.
Blake chuckled.
"It is something,” he said.
“Let’s go in here, this is the family room which we don’t use very often. I will go and get us some drinks,” he said while guiding me through the door.
He leaves me be and I can’t help but look at some photos that have been placed around the room. I don’t know many of the people but Blake is in a few. He looked cute as a younger kid.
“Mate needs to know. I think you should tell him about Allie,” Puna said, softly. “He won’t leave us.”
I want to believe her but I don’t know.
Who would want a broken mate who is scared of being with a guy and who has intimacy issues?
I was broken to the bone after what Michael did to me. I don’t even know if I could be intimate with Blake, kissing was nice but I think that’s all I can do with him.
“Izzy, he wouldn’t push you into anything you don’t want to do,” Puna said. “If he does, I will hurt him myself.”
I couldn't help the laugh that slipped past my lips.
“You have a nice laugh,” Blake said as I look over my shoulder and smile.
“Thank you,” I said.
Blake hands me a glass of water and nods to the couch for us to sit on.
I sat down, taking the seat away from him.
I take a sip of water and look around.
“Izzy, I want to know why you don’t want a mate,” He blurts out, which causes me to spit my water all over myself. So, we are going straight to the serious questions now.
I gulped.
“You really want to know,” I said in a weak voice.
Blake moves closer to me.
I looked up to see Blake sitting next to me. He places his hand on my knee sending tingles up my legs which is making Puna purr in my head again.
I look ahead as I don’t want to look at him when I tell him.
“The reason why I don’t want a mate. You see when I was 15......I was........RAPED,” I said, feeling everything come at me at once.
The room was silent, but I turned and could see the shock, horror, and pity on Blake's face.
I could feel the anger roll off him, but he quickly recovered when he realized I am looking at him.
“When?” he asked; he couldn’t even finish the question.
I was better off telling him the story.
“Well, when my mum passed away Kat decided we should leave and live in a human town. She placed me in a human school. I wasn’t popular at all, but I did get noticed by this boy called Michael. He was a year older than me. I was 15 years old. Everything was ok at the start and he was nice,” I said.
“You don’t have to tell me,” he said but I shook my head. “I need to tell you please, let me explain, just don’t stop me as this is the first time I have ever opened up about this to anyone else."
Blake said nothing but nodded.
I closed my eyes and continued.
“Well, I only kissed him, nothing else. He wanted to take my virginity but I wouldn’t allow him. He tried everything, but he soon got really angry. He started hurting me by hitting me. It started once every so often but only where people couldn’t see the bruises. I had to be careful with who I spoke to, if he didn’t like them he would hurt me,” I said.
I could feel Blake’s anger but he doesn’t say anything. I try to hold his hand but he moves his to his knee.
I felt hurt but carried on with what I needed to tell him.
“One night, I was in my room when I got a text from him to say we should meet up; this all happened in 6 months of being together," I said, looking at my hands. "He picked me up from the house but as soon as I got into the car everything changed. He put something over my mouth, which knocked me out and I woke up strapped to a chair. He took me to an abandoned warehouse and tortured me.”
I had tears flowing down my cheeks.
Blake was angry but he waited patiently for me to finish.
“Izzy, you don’t.....” he started to say but I shook my head. “No, I have to. You asked why I don’t want a mate. This is one of a few reasons; you know the other one is what my dad did to my mum.”
Blake stared at me but nods, placing his hand back on mine.
“He tortured me for hours, I was covered in bruises and blood,” I said.
“He even stabbed me in the thigh,” I said. I stretched my leg out and showed him my leg to reveal the thick long scar inside my leg.
Blake stares at it as I continued.
“While I was being tortured I didn’t know Todd, Kat’s mate, was out looking for me with Kat. Michael told me that he sent a text saying goodbye to Kat telling her I didn’t want to live with them anymore," I said as a lone tear escaped. "I was so afraid, I was weak due to the torture, but he grabbed my throat hard and squeezed. He ripped my clothes off with the other hand, he raped me."
Blake tensed beside me as the last word escaped my mouth. I know this is making him worse but I needed to finish this story.
“He raped me over and over again. He didn’t just do it once; he repeated it three times,” I said, thinking about how I was completely numb. The memory of his breath against my ear as he grunted, telling me how he wanted me. His moans as he comes inside me.
Every little flash of the horror that I went through hit me hard as I let my anger and pain come to the surface.
I sniffled.
“When he was finished, he kneeled down by my side and said, that’s all I ever wanted from you, you should have given it to me willingly, and maybe we would have been better,' I said.
Blake still doesn’t move his hand from mine.
I know I have to tell him, I have to tell him about Allie.
I look over at him, his jaw is tight. But when he catches me looking at him, he looks into my eyes; they don’t say anything.
“There is also one more thing,” I said quietly.
He just stares at me, as I look at our hands being together, it feels so good.
“What?” He asks softly.
“I was pregnant with his child,” I said as he stiffens. “I have a 4 and half-year-old daughter.”
I feel the urge to say more, and I do.
“You have to understand, I thought it wasn't impossible for me to get pregnant by another person other than my mate,” I said.
I kept my eyes focused on our joined hands as I don’t want to look at him.
I know this is going to cause more issues, but curiosity took over, and I looked at him, and he looks blankly at me.
Suddenly he moves, stands up, and moves from the room we are in.
Pain rippled through me.
I knew this would happen.
I move slowly and follow him.
I watched as Blake starts running towards the front door.
I followed him to the front door and watch as Blake sprinted straight to the forest, running away from the pack house.
Running away from me.
Puna is whimpering in my head, but I stare out.
I knew he wouldn’t accept it.
I could feel the tear slide down my cheek.