The Rules of Dating a Younger Man

It was like I lived two different lives now—my usual one in New York City, and the life I couldn’t wait to get back to upstate. The latter was much more exciting.

Getting through the week was growing tougher. I was antsy for the days to pass.

On Wednesday afternoon, I decided to walk home from work to expend some of my energy. It was a clear, cool September day in the City with not a cloud in the sky. It made me wish Alex were here. How I would love to take her to dinner at my favorite Italian restaurant, then bring her back to my place and—well, there was no end to the things I’d want to do with her alone in my apartment. Knowing Alex, though, she’d make some excuse and run before we got to that point. Not to mention, bringing her back to the building would raise some eyebrows among the friends I hadn’t been keeping apprised of my personal life as of late. I couldn’t wait, though, to have Alex here for a visit.

Almost at my building, I passed the café around the corner and found Colby’s wife, Billie, and Holden’s wife, Lala, sitting by the window chatting. Billie looked up for a moment and noticed me. Smiling, I attempted to keep moving, but Billie urgently waved me in. I should’ve known I wasn’t going to get away with nonchalantly walking by.

“Not so fast!” she mouthed through the glass. “Get over here.”

Great. No doubt she wanted more information after the phone call I’d subjected her to with Alex last weekend. Probably about time I explained that. “What’s up, ladies?” I asked as I entered.

“What’s up with you, Brayden Foster?” Billie smirked.

“Not too much.” I smiled guiltily.

“Not too much, huh? That’s not what I heard…” Lala winked.

The smell of fresh coffee wafted in the air, the sound of grinding a welcome distraction from the inquisition.

“You know what? I could use a pick-me-up,” I told them. “Be right back.”

I walked over to the counter and decided to order Alex’s favorite drink, see what all the fuss was about.

“I’ll have a coffee with oat milk, two sugars, one pump of caramel, and a dash of cinnamon, please.”

“Can you repeat that?” the barista said.

I laughed inwardly at what a dork I was as I repeated the order.

After he made it, I took my coffee back to the table where Billie and Lala were eagerly awaiting my return.

“Now spill,” Billie said the moment I sat down. “This Alex must be pretty damn special for you to put her on the phone with me. You’re normally so secretive.”

“She is special.”

They both awwwed in unison.

“Tell us about her,” Lala said.

So I told them the tale of my experience thus far with Alex. They listened attentively as I recounted my growing attraction to a woman who wasn’t making it easy. It felt good to let it all out, though. It made me realize how many emotions I’d kept bottled inside lately.

“How much older are we talking?” Billie finally asked.

“That’s the funny thing.” I chuckled. “I don’t actually know.”

Lala’s eyes widened. “Really? How is that possible?”

“Told her it didn’t matter to me, and she never specifically divulged.”

“That’s wild.” Lala licked foam from her mouth.

Billie pursed her lips. “You must have some idea, though…”

I shrugged. “Ten years-ish, maybe a little less, maybe a little more. But I don’t really give a damn. She’s physically the hottest woman I’ve ever known, and there’s something so special and unique about her. She’s not superficial or one-dimensional. She cares about people. She just started volunteering at the hospital. And she’s lived, you know? Lived and lost. Her husband was a lot older than her. He left behind a daughter—Alex’s stepdaughter, who’s ironically around my age. Anyway, losing a spouse like that? It has to change you, help you understand your priorities. It’s why she’s being so cautious. As annoying as it can be, I kind of love that she’s taking her time and not just jumping into things.” I sipped my drink—sweeter than I normally liked it, but still tasty. “I’m honestly loving the chase.”

Lala crossed her arms. “But on some level, her taking her time means she’s hesitant. Why do you think that is?”

“I know what her hesitation is. She thinks we want different things and are at different places in our lives. Alex knows I want kids. I think that scares her.”

“She doesn’t want kids of her own?” Lala asked.

“I think she feels like the opportunity for that has passed.”

“She thinks she’s too old?” Lala frowned.

“I’m not entirely sure,” I admitted.

“If she doesn’t want or can’t have kids, does that matter to you?” Billie interjected.

“Not enough, honestly.”

“Well, it doesn’t matter to you now, during the infatuation period,” Lala said. “But it might later.”

“A lot of things might happen later. I could get struck by lightning later. I don’t really care about the later in life. The time is always now. No one is guaranteed tomorrow. Your brother, Ryan, taught us all that, remember?”

Lala nodded.

Billie took a sip of her coffee. “Okay, but I can understand Alex’s concern. I mean, if she knows she’s not going to have kids and you want them, that’s a serious consideration. It makes sense why she wouldn’t want to get her heart involved with someone she thinks she’ll have to let go someday.”

I shook my head. “Life doesn’t have to be that hard, that complicated. A lot of people can’t have kids. What do they do? They figure out a way around it. They adopt. Or they find other joys in life.”

“Wow.” Lala leaned back in her seat. “I can’t say I’ve ever seen you this into a woman.”

“That’s exactly it,” I said. “She’s a real woman. And when something feels right, you want to share it.” I stared down into my cup. “Although…Holden is really the only one of the guys I’ve told about her. Owen’s been so wrapped up in Devyn. He and I haven’t caught up in a bit.” I turned to Billie. “But you’re welcome to fill Colby in.”

“Oh, you know I will.” She winked.

***

That evening, Colby, Owen, Holden, and I had our board meeting at a local bar. The meetings were to discuss building business, but we mostly got the boring stuff out of the way so we could shoot the shit and tool around for a couple of hours.

Tonight, though, I decided to duck out early, after one drink. Holden followed. “Wait up,” he called, placing his hand on my shoulder. “I know why I’m leaving early. I have a sick baby at home. But what about you? Why’d you rush out of there?”

We stepped into the cold night air and began to walk, side by side, back to the building.

“I have a phone call to make.”

“To Alex, I take it? Lala told me she and Billie were giving you the third degree earlier today.”

“Yeah. I tried to walk past them at the café, but that didn’t work. So I joined them instead.”

“I hadn’t realized how much things have escalated between you and Alex. You guys were talking about kids and shit?”

“Only in the context of Alex not wanting them,” I clarified.

“Still, even just mentioning it. That’s some serious stuff. Lala kept saying how smitten you seem.”

“Smitten is a strong word,” I said, though she was right.

“How come you didn’t mention anything about Alex to the guys just now? You were totally vague the whole night.”

“I’ll fill them in another time. I still don’t know how it’s gonna pan out. As much as I like her, she’s not there yet. So I don’t have anything solid to report. I guess I don’t want to jinx it and get ahead of myself, you know?” I sped up my steps. “By the way, can you walk faster? Why the hell are you so slow?”

“What’s the rush?”

“Alex seems to think ten PM is late, and I want to catch her before she goes to bed.”

“Yeah, you’re not smitten.” He chuckled as we picked up the pace.

***

Back at my apartment, I sent Alex a text.

Brayden: Are you down to FaceTime? Or am I too late?

A few minutes later, she sent a reply.

Alex: I’m actually out with a friend.

Hmm…

Brayden: A friend?

Alex: Wells. We’re having tapas.

Relief washed over me—her gay friend and business partner.

Brayden: Ah.

Before I could text anything else, my phone rang.

It was Alex. Except when I answered the FaceTime call, it wasn’t Alex’s face on the screen. It was some dude wearing an earring.

“Wow. You’re even more stunning in person,” he said.

“Wells…”

“I love hearing you say my name,” he purred. “Say it again.”

I narrowed my eyes but complied. “Uh…Wells?”

“I’m sorry, Brayden!” I could hear Alex say from somewhere behind him.

Wells glanced over his shoulder. “I asked Alex who she was rudely texting while we were having dinner. She wouldn’t tell me, so I grabbed her phone. When I saw it was you, loverboy, I gave her a pass. But I think it’s time you and I had a chat.”

“I’m here for it, Wells. And I suppose this is payback since I made Alex talk to my friend Billie the other day.”

Wells scratched his chin. “So, I have some questions…”

“Shoot.” I settled into my couch, feeling my pulse speed up.

“What are your intentions with my friend?”

“You don’t start out light, do you?”

“Well, I was gonna ask whether you shave your pubes, but, you know, first things first.”

“Ooh-kay.” I chuckled. “Got it.”

Alex stuck her head in. “I’m so sorry—”

“No worries, Alex. I can handle this.”

He glared at me. “Well?”

Rubbing my palm on my pants, I cleared my throat. “My intentions are honest, Wells. But I can’t make any promises about what the future holds for us. We’re still getting to know each other. Right now, I just want to keep spending time with her. I have no intention of playing games. I’m serious about wanting to see where things go. I love her company. I love all of her little idiosyncrasies. And I count the days until she and I can be together on the weekends. I’ve never experienced anything like this before. And as I’ve told Alex, I can be as patient as she needs me to be.” I exhaled.

“From what I hear, you’ve been quite patient. Might be going for Guinness World Records for blue balls…”

Ain’t that the truth. “She’s worth it.”

“I agree.” He took a sip of what looked like a Cosmo, then set it down. “Now, let’s get to the nitty gritty…”

I raised a brow. “That wasn’t the nitty gritty?”

“No. Not in the least. We’re just getting started.”

Damn. I was the one who needed that Cosmo. “Okay…” I sighed and licked my lips.

“Why an older woman, loverboy?”

“Why not?”

“Good answer. But you’re gonna have to give me a bit more than that.”

“My attraction to Alex isn’t because of her age. I want her. Plain and simple. The age part is a non-issue, as far as I’m concerned. Therefore, I can’t really answer why an older woman. I didn’t set out to meet an older woman. I met Alex. End of story.”

I’d thought that was clear enough and hoped he’d let me off the hook, but no such luck.

“But there is an age difference. Might there be a reason you’re drawn to Mrs. Robinson?”

“Mrs. Robinson?”

“That’s a term for an older woman who dates a younger man. You’ve never heard that before?”

“Nope.”

“Well, that shows your age.” He winked.

“Anyway…” I rolled my eyes. “I’ve never been drawn to an older woman before. So it’s not a habit. It’s the first time for me.”

“So you’re inexperienced with older women, then…”

I sighed. “I guess you could say that. But I don’t see that as a bad thing. Alex has never dated a younger guy either. So we’re even.”

“Hmm…” Wells tilted his head. “Any mommy issues?”

“Wells!” Alex shouted from behind him.

“It’s fine, Alex,” I said, hoping she could hear me. Taking a deep breath, I admitted, “My mother did leave home when I was nine.”

His expression turned serious. “Do you think that could have something to do with your attraction to an older woman now?”

Quite honestly, I found that assertion annoying. It actually made me a little angry, but I tried not to show it. I needed this guy on my side. “I don’t see what my mother leaving has to do with anything. If you want to deconstruct my mother’s abandonment and somehow correlate it to my attraction to Alex, go ahead. But it would be impossible to prove. Is it possible that there’s some connection to my mother I’m not aware of? Maybe. Anything is possible. But it’s not a conscious correlation for me. Why does there have to be a reason for me to want to be with Alex besides just really liking her?” I paused. “Does your family history dictate who you’re attracted to, Wells?”

“Definitely not.”

“Well, there you go.”

“Fair enough.” He nodded. “What do you like best about her?”

“How much time do you have?”

“All night, my friend.” He took a sip of his drink.

“I’ll say this… My absolute favorite thing about Alex is her heart. Just the circumstances of how we met tell you what a good person she is, so giving of her time. The more I get to know her, the more examples I find of that. But, honestly, man, I could never list all the things I love about her. It’s just…everything.” I closed my eyes momentarily. “I love everything.”

When I looked again, Wells seemed lost in thought with a goofy smile on his face. “Any other questions?” I asked.

He sighed. “Yeah. When are you gonna come to Connecticut so I can size you up in person?”

“Whenever Alex invites me, I’m there.” Feeling a weight lift from my chest, I winked. “You can hook me up with a spa service.”

“You’re too damn perfect. Not sure there’s much we can do for you. I would suggest maybe teeth whitening, but yours are pretty damn spectacular as is.”

“Well, you both have an open invitation to come to Manhattan. Anytime.”

“That’s something I can get down with.”

I had a sudden thought. “Are you single, Wells?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“I know a guy. He just became single recently, too. Name’s Deek. He’s good shit. Lives in my building. I can hook you up.”

“Deek. I like the sound of that.”

“You like ’em big and brawny?”

His eyes sparkled. “Do I ever.”

“Tatted up?”

His eyes widened. “Fuck yeah!”

I winked. “Let’s talk.”

He finally turned to Alex. “I like this guy.” He handed her the phone.

Her beautiful cheeks were pinker than I’d ever seen them. “Can I call you later when I’ve kicked him to the curb?”

“Of course.”

“Thanks.”

She ended the call, and I laid my head back and took a few moments to decompress from that mini-interrogation. After, I busied myself around the apartment.

About a half hour later, the phone rang. It was a regular call from Alex, not FaceTime. I picked up. “Hey. Isn’t it way past your bedtime?”

“I don’t normally go out so late on weeknights, but Wells wanted to try that tapas place, so…”

“I’m kind of disappointed you didn’t FaceTime me just now. I was counting on getting to see you.”

“Well, considering I’ve just taken my face off, you’re out of luck.” She laughed.

“You don’t wear that much makeup, though.”

“I know, but I like to look my best for you. So I prefer a little help.”

“Trust me, you don’t need any help. And fair warning, one of these days I want to see it all—bare face and bare everything else.” I paused. “Speaking of bare, Wells apparently forgot to ask about my pubes when all was said and done.”

“There’s always next time.” She laughed and let out a long breath. “I’m sorry again about tonight.”

“No apology needed. But it’s funny, I feel like I’ve spent this entire day on the stand when it comes to us.”

“What do you mean?”

“Before Wells, Billie, and Holden’s wife, Lala, gave me the third degree. It was the first time I’d seen them since I put you on the phone with Billie. So naturally, they wanted to know what was up.”

“And then Wells saw an opportunity tonight and took it. I hope that wasn’t too painful.”

“I’m happy you have friends like Wells who care enough to grill the guy you’re dating.”

“Are we dating?”

“Alex, I think about no one else and count the days until I can see you on the weekend. If that’s not dating, I don’t know what the hell is.”