The picture book

Everything before I went home seemed to be a blur. Dragging over the last classes of school. Then heading over to the hospital. I was beat, but my curiosity of just where my sister had been hiding out lately was winning over my want to have a nap. I peered in her room, but she wasn’t there. The only other place I could think she could be was in the black room that we set up for her. Unless she went to a friends place. If that was so I was out of luck.

I looked up to make sure the red light wasn’t on and slowly opened the door. What I saw took my breath away, literally. It was my sister Denise smoking a joint! She was always in my mind the perfect girl at everything and here she was wasting her life with drugs. I could hardly believe it. She gave a gasp throwing it down and stomping it with her foot.

“If you tell mom, you will end up like this joint. Don’t you know how to knock?”

I frowned and shook my head a little bit, my stomach was doing flip flops. It was like I was staring at someone else besides my sister.

“Why are you doing this Denise? Your pretty, and popular. Whatever you think that joint is doing, it isn’t going to do it!”

Denise looked about ready to barf.

“All I need is you lecturing me. I went to my friends party. She gave me a joint. Every other party she had the drugs at them. Now I can’t stop taking it. I...don’t know what to do. If I stop smoking I won’t be popular anymore. All my friends will just think I am a drag at the parties they throw.”

I rolled my eyes.

“You were popular before you started smoking. What makes you think that you won’t be once you stop?”

Denise looked down a bit.

“I lied to you Ayita. I was only friends with one popular girl who I hoped would help me mingle with the rest. That party was the chance I had to be in the limelight. And now I am. They think I am cool because I do drugs!”

My eyes widened, who was my sister really?

“If you keep doing drugs, you will never be cool. You will just be someone that everyone else wants you to be! A lie! I hate you Denise. I won’t tell mom out of respect for you and that is dwindling because of this nasty habit of yours!”

I stormed out and headed up to my room to have a cry.

I heard the door creak open, I looked up from my bed with bleary eyes seeing my mother entering the room. She sat on the edge of the bed stroking my hair.What was she doing here? Usually when I was upset she didn’t seem to notice or care.

“I am really sorry that I have been so grouchy to you all these years. You just look so much like your father”

I had no idea what looking like my father had anything to do with how she had treated me. I just gave a little shrug wondering what was prompting my mother to spill her guts to me. It certainly wasn’t the fact I was crying since many times I cried up in my room, ignored.

“I probably shouldn’t tell you this. But for a long time I felt guilty about not giving you as much attention as your sister. I wanted to show you how much I cared about you.”

I perked up, giving her wary interest.

“How does this have to do with dad?”

Her shoulders slumped, her eyes downcast. I could tell it was really hard for her to say what she was saying.

“Your father never wanted a second child. I blamed you when he started to cheat on me.I knew it was unfair for me to have these feelings so I just ended up ignoring you and doting on your sister. I am really sorry Ayita.”

I gulped a bit, feeling angry but at least now how mother treated me made sense. I couldn’t help but wonder what was making her confess this now of all times. I was already feeling bad enough about the path Denise had taken.

“I am glad you told me, mother.”

I said with a strain in my voice. What she had said had made me hate my father more than I already did.

“There is something important I need to talk about to you and your sister at dinner. From now on I promise to start to treat you better. It isn’t your fault your father is a slime ball.”

Promises, Promises. I laid my head under the pillow as my mother wandered out of the room. I didn’t want to hear whatever news she had to tell us. I had a nagging feeling it must be really a doozy for her to blurt out a secret she had held from me ever since my birth.

I dreaded going downstairs for dinner that night. I was tempted to just tell mother I was too sick to eat anything. In reality I knew not going to dinner wasn’t going to make me miss out on whatever news my mother had for me.

Sitting down I noticed that mother had cooked me and Denise our favorite meals. Something really big was up. I speared the food feeling too nervous to really enjoy the meal. Mother sat down at the end of the table clearing her throat.

“I have some news for you. I don’t think either of you will like it very much”

Me and my sister both just gave her a look like, just get it over with it already. It seemed Denise wasn’t really getting into her favorite meal either.

“I am pregnant.”

I spit out my food as she said that.So many questions were running in my brain. I wanted to scream out at her but I couldn’t not after she had reached out to me like that earlier. Though maybe that was the reason why she had done that. Denise on the other hand wasn’t that silent.

“What the hell? How did that happen! Don’t tell me I know how. But who in the hell could it be? As far as I know you aren’t seeing anyone. Are you going to drop the bomb your going to marry someone we never met too? I don’t believe this shit!”

Denise pretty much said what was on my mind. I picked up a piece of food on my fork, acting much more calm about this than my sister was.

“Denise, I am upset about this as you are! I don’t know what made me have that fling with your father. I thought that maybe he would come back to me, and stop cheating with me once he saw that having two kids didn’t make me any less good in bed.”

I gaped, not believing my mother would say something like that to us. I looked over at Denise curious of what sort of reaction she would have to that. I wasn’t going to say a word. I was staying out of this.

“Oh my God mom, that is too much information. You think that getting in bed with dad would make him run back to you? He’s just a cheater, he will always be that way no matter what you do. I don’t know how you can just run back to him and show up here with another sister or brother who won’t have a father because you can’t get over that creep!”

Mother turned red in the face.

“Go to your room young lady! Your not going to speak to your mother in that way!”

Denise flipped mother off heading up to her room. Mother started to cry , leaning her face in the carefully made meal that she had made for her sister. As much as I agreed with what my sister said it wasn’t fair to treat her like that. I moved over to her and put an arm around her.

“At least you don’t hate me...”

I looked over at her, leaning her face up from the food

“I don’t think Denise hates you either. She’s just pretty mad.”

Mother sighed a bit.

“I am mad at myself. She’s right now another child will have to grow up without a dad and it will be all my fault.”

I frowned a little bit trying to think of what to say.

“Well I will help you mom. Maybe someday you will find someone who isn’t as jerky as dad is.”

Mother kissed me.

“Your a lifesaver Ayita, thanks for being so understanding. I think I will go upstairs and take a bath and get some rest now.”

As cool as I was on the outside, I felt stressed on the inside. I wanted to talk to someone about this but I really didn’t have any close friends. Flopping down on the bed I noticed the picture book laying on the floor. I hadn’t spoken to Oliva in a long time. I opened it watching the familiar form of the ghost appearing in front of me.

“You wouldn’t believe the stressful day I had today Oliva. Though I guess it can’t beat being a ghost who is trapped in a picture book.”

I said that with a nervous laugh. Now that I had become more comfortable with the spirit I forgot that she was really dead. How could that compare with having a pot smoking sister and a pregnant mom. I know I would prefer my life over death.

“Just what was so bad about it?” Oliva said.

Stretching out over the bed, I gave a little sigh.

“Never mind, just how did you end up being a ghost anyways?”

Olivia looked uncomfortable. “I rather just talk about your stressful day”

I wondered when I was going to ever learn anything about this spirit. I had a strong feeling I was supposed to be helping her but it was hard when I knew nothing about her. I started to tell the spirit about my day thinking maybe it would loosen her up to tell me something about herself at least. Oliva listened carefully to my story before replying.

“You were very mature to handle the situation in the way you did.”

I shrugged as I replied.

“If Denise wasn’t there, I would of probably bitched my mother out instead.”

Oliva looked thoughtful as she floated there.

“You must think of me like a stranger, I know so much about you and you know so little about me. I am so afraid to tell the truth but it might be the only way for me to be free and be able to cross to the beyond.”

Though I was curious, I really wasn’t in a hurry to give up the spirit’s friendship. If I managed to free her then I would never see Oliva again.

“Well take your time. Tell me only what you feel comfortable in telling me.”

Oliva started to look wispy.

“Thank you for being so understanding Ayita. Your a good friend. I don’t think I am ready to tell you anything about myself just yet. But tomorrow will be a photo that will give you an insight of my life in the picture book.”

Oliva vanished before my eyes, I changed into my pj’s and flopped into bed falling into a troubled sleep.