SWNOVELS Chapter 20
The gloomy weather is suiting for this occasion. We are pouring our hearts out.
The wind picks up but Hunter seems completely at ease in this weather. His amber eyes stare at me impassively. His eyes tell me that there is no judgment. With a heavy sigh, I stare back at him.
“Well, I guess I’ll tell you about my past as well,” I avert my eyes to the sky and concentrate that I do not break down in front of him.
“I am an only child that was raised by my father. Andrew is the only person that I might consider a sibling. It was the two of us against the world that is until I met Marcus. My father tried his best to always be there for me as a father, mother, and friend but being the alpha always seemed to get in the way.”
I laugh at the thought, how naïve was I, swallowing down the lump forming.
“I find it silly now but when I was younger it struck a nerve when my father was never able to come to the father-daughter events at school. I would throw it in his face when all my friend’s fathers were there with their daughters and I had to stay home or stand on the sidelines and watch as my friends enjoyed their time with their old man.”
“Anyways we were having a rocky relationship until I graduated high school. By this time my father was spending so much time with Andrew and his beta that I started getting jealous. He could make time for them and not for me? I would get into physical fights with Andrew because of this I’m not even sure how we are even friends still. I took it for granted back then but I would kill for one more night that my father would walk into my room in the middle of the night and kiss me goodnight.”
My hands are on top of the table and they clench into fists as I try to control my feelings. Hunter’s hands wrap around mine and I look into his eyes and they soften.
The burning behind my eyes vanish.
“A couple of years back my father and I started my training I was having trouble with my wolf and my father didn’t like it. My animal side was taking full control of me once I was in wolf form and my father decided that I needed to learn control. It appears that my wolf was becoming restless that I hadn’t found my mate.” Rolling my eyes my wolf growl unhappily, “A few months back there was a party for one of the wolfing’s that finally shifted. My father convinced me to go to it and who would have thought, the alpha’s daughter found her mate at last.”
My wolf scuffles away not wanting to think about Marcus. “Marcus was part of another pack he never told me which pack it was I guess he used that as an advantage because I can’t trace him back to them. Anyways he came down because he is related to a family here.” My eyes go to Hunter his hands still wrapped around mine and shrug for no apparent reason.
“After we met that night we were inseparable. We spend every minute together but away from the pack’s eyes. See I’ve always been the type to be serious a no-nonsense type of girl but with him, he would make me become a completely different person.” I stop for a moment and take a deep breath.
“You don’t have to keep going if you don’t want to,” Hunter says but my eyes look over my hands.
“I haven’t even gotten to the best part.”
“Your hands? They are not getting warmer.” He rubs them fast trying to heat them.
“I’m always cold and your hands are cold as well,” I watch as he stops and I can feel him staring so I look up. “It happened when you lost your mate?” I nod, “mine did as well.”
“Where was I? Ah, I was not the same person when he around. I was so much happier and I felt complete. My wolf had her partner as well with his wolf and me well I found my soul mate. Marcus was brave, strong, and caring. We did our rounds together and when we were free we stuck to each other like gum under our shoes.”
A drop hits my cheek and I do not know if it is a tear or raindrop. “I was never intended to be alpha you see. My father’s beta and omega were younger wolves that were supposed to step up if anything happens to my father."
Hunter gives me a gentle squeeze.
They were so young. My wolf grieves for them and whimpers.
My eyes water and Hunter’s infuriating eyes lock on mine. “He didn’t?” The tears start streaming down my face but I shake my head.
“I was in the forest when that happened. I was supposed to meet Marcus at our special spot. It was as if that was fate wanted me to die that night. Rogues were coming into our territory. I was unmarked and in heat. One of the rogues was in heat as well. Marcus was nowhere close to me so the person I call out for was my father. He came after me. I ran, ran like a scared child. The rogue caught me and he was deranged from being in heat that...”
“No," his growl makes me tighten my hands around his. His body stiffens.
"No, he didn’t rape me. My father came to my aid. Shoving that wolf off of me and going after it." Hunter relaxes. "They both ran into the forest and that’s when I heard the growling and whimpering. I mind linked my father to leave it. I told him that I was fine. That I was okay! I waited but he wouldn’t res-” I gasp for air and drop my head whipping my hands out Hunter’s as I bury my face into them.
“He managed to kill the rogue but you see my father never really healed well after my mother’s passing."
"Melany," Hunter gulps down as I wipe the tears washing down my cheeks. I wipe them away as I try to compose myself. With a heavy sigh, I give him a weak smile and continue.
“Marcus was not by my side when my father passed. He needed time. At my father’s funeral, he was guarding instead of being my side. Later he asked for a second chance. He was my mate I thought he changed and I gave him another chance.” My jaw ticks as I grind my teeth together. “He thinks that a she-wolf should not run a pack. He hated that he was the weak one of the relationship. He left because I did not let go of my alpha status.”
“What?”
“Would you make your mate do that?” I stare at him. He licks his lips and shakes his head.
“No. There is a reason why you’re alpha and not him.” Hunter smiles at me, “You have some work to do but I can see that you care for this pack and I always wanted to see a woman take this position. And he was not secure in his manhood that he needed to bring you down with him."
The heaviness in my chest eases up a bit for a moment, then I am hurled back into my torment.
“First I lose my father and then Marcus says that I can’t be alpha. Who the hell is he to tell me what I can be?”
The pain came hurling through me with no mercy. I cry out in pain and it seems as if I am back at the night my chest being ripped apart raw. The seat next to me creaks in protest as Hunter’s weight invades the emptiness next to me.
“Melany,” he whispers but I bury my face deeper into my hands. He wraps his arm around me and his hand grips my bare arm the pain simultaneously vanishes from within me with his touch. I swallow down the lump and lift my face out of my hands.
Hunter has his eyes closed but his face shows clear signs of pain. His eyebrows pull together and he winces before he opens his eyes. They are on me scrutinizing me, “Wow, that was painful.”
“More painful than Haley’s pain,” I whisper as all my thoughts go to Haley and the pain she went through must be more than mine, I’m sure.
“Yours and Haley’s pains are mental for me once I let go the pain vanishes but your pain is emotional nothing that I do can help me reduce it. But with Haley, it was more physical where I could massage my head or hers and that would dull the pain for a moment at least.”
I understand. His soft eyes stare at me for a second when he says, “So he is alive then?”
Alive to the world. Dead to me.
“Probably.” I shrug.
“You haven’t talked to him?” Hunter places himself in front of me so that I have to look at him.
“Nope, he wants it to seem as if I never found my mate. Out of sight out of mind, I guess. We’re both unmarked.” He is not bound to me in any way other than knowing that I am alive.
“That is a worthless excuse for a mate, excuse me for being blunt. He’s not even worthy of calling you his mate.”
You’re telling me.
A small smile spreads across my lips and I look over at him and he stares back. A small giggle escapes me.
“What’s funny?” He tilts his head to get a better look at me.
“My wolf agrees with you and she never agrees with anyone. She always wants to pick a fight with anyone around.”
“I think that if I would meet your wolf I would like her as well,” my wolf's ears perk up and she lowers her head, what is wrong with you?
“I highly doubt that,” I smirk at her and then burst into a carefree laugh when my wolf growls and snaps at me.
“Did she make you laugh?” Hunter’s eyebrows raise and he stares at me as I fight to breathe.
“Yeah,” the smell of pancakes makes it way out of the packhouse and towards us. I take in the aroma and my stomach growls.
“Come let’s get some breakfast it seems like you need to gain some weight you look underweight.” He helps me out of my seat and we walk to the back door. For the first time in the past weeks, I am looking forward to breakfast.
I told you talking to him would help you with your emotions.