The Making of a Dark Gamma - Book 1

Long months have passed since Antonia had come back to the pack, her training has progressed and she’s a few months from her fifteenth Birthday, not that it will matter here, it won’t be celebrated, but it will almost mark her first year away from James.

She’s become better at hiding her feelings of loss from herself but having learnt what friendship meant, her life is now lonelier than it ever has been.

Humans have a saying, ‘It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all’ but Toni isn’t sure that it’s true, she’s never felt such abject loss before.

The empty feeling she holds in her heart at having to get through the day with no one to just chat to or laugh with is harder than she ever imagined, she didn’t remember it ever being this hard, the one saving grace she has is the Alpha is pushing her harder and longer in her training as he sees her equal to an adult.

Not having any free time helps otherwise she feels she would drown in the darkness that her loneliness surrounds her in, it’s only the memories of James that bring light into her life and she clings to those to help her get through each night.

Sparring in human and wolf form for at least seven hours a day, with six hours of intense, private schooling to meet the Royal pack requirements that every pup be schooled until they can pass the final exams, usually taken at seventeen.

However, at this rate, she’ll be able to pass them before her birthday.

This has been her life six days a week, starting at five am with thirty minutes for her breakfast and lunch, her day is monitored and marshalled until seven pm each day, after she showers and eats her evening meal it’s eight pm.

Then it's off to her room where the pain of her loneliness hits her before she sleeps, rinse and repeat, Sunday she has a day off, and it’s those days, she spends almost all her time sunk low in her wolf’s mind, letting Tyra be Tyra.

In her sparring in both forms, she fights the Chief Delta, Rupert and the Beta, always watched over by the Alpha, occasionally, she is required to spar with up to five unlucky warriors all of whom are commanded to repeat nothing of her training, to simulate fighting multiple opponents.

Most leave with injuries but they are afforded extra privileges in the pack for the honour of being chosen to fight her.

Tyra is a natural, she controls almost all of their actions and while they both regularly came back injured and bloodied from fighting, each day she has gone from strength to strength, recently she’d been inflicting more damage than she was receiving to all her opponents.

She knows her fights with the Beta will be phased out, after all, it wouldn’t be good for her to know she can beat him; imagine if she had the audacity to challenge him for his position, she almost laughs at the idea, not that she wants that role any more than the one they have planned for her.

The damage done to her in the fights is never enough to leave major scars but the pain is there as an incentive for her to do better the next time.

As she looks in the mirror, tending to her cuts from today, she reflects that she is also never against Robert or Michael, who train together in the afternoon, while she has her school lessons, maybe because by the nature of her role, she will generally be alone, or to stop her forming bonds with them, she is a tool to be used, nothing more, nothing less.

Antonia finishes cleaning her wounds, she’d made the grade to keep her Trainee role within seven days of being back in the Nightshade pack, even with the Doctor refusing to sign her off to train for three days, something that he’d been punished for after the Royals had left.

There were others in the pack that were disappointed by her achieving the standard, specifically, her second cousin once removed, who was also descended from the same bloodline, down a second son branch, which the Alpha deemed weaker.

She honestly believed they had hopes that the Alpha would pick their son, Pete and name him as Gamma in her absence but he was only just above average in the pack training classes before she had left and the Alpha would never accept that standard for a ranked wolf.

Plus since she had been back, Pete had slacked off even more, barely meeting the minimum standards for his age.

So I’m guessing you are asking yourself why I bothered passing the standard if I don’t like what it meant I’d become.

Yes, I can see you there, the one with the judgemental eyes, I don’t think you realise the implications if you are so quick to judge.

Tyra and I had a long discussion on this, we could have failed purposely and allowed the brand to be burnt off, it was an option we worked through, but here’s the thing I think you forgot.

Bloodlines are everything to Alpha Vincent.

Remember I’ve said that before?

So that means, if I purposefully fail, and he will know, you don’t go from star pupil to failing without questions being asked, but anyway, if I failed, what am I good for?

Breeding!

To keep the bloodline pure, I’d be forced to accept the new Gamma, whomever that may be, as soon as I hit twenty, and that’s not an enjoyable thought, so don’t be so quick to judge.

Honestly, I had two options, live with the self-loathing that comes with being the Gamma and have a modicum of control over my life, or fail on purpose, knowing that no one in the pack would want to be a friend, too much history, so I’d be limited to a life of solitude and no control, forced to take the appointed Gamma as my mate.

I had a choice, the devil I knew or the devil I didn’t, so if you still want to judge me go ahead, I’m used to it but always remember I’m watching you, just as you are watching me.

Since she’d come back, she’d closed the weapon range down for one hour after dark on Saturday, to train in private, usually going solo hunting on Sundays with either her wolf or bow.

The fact that she was allowed to go alone means they still think the electronic tracker that had been embedded in one of her wounds was still there, rather than hidden in her outfits.

Whenever she is going to breach the borders, she links to the Alpha to get permission, tracking rogues who skirt the pack or bringing back some form of game that she had hunted is all approved behaviour, for her to do the job well, she needs to be confident and independent, not relying on others, so solo hunting, even off pack land is oddly, actively encouraged.

This is her life, no friends, no cool clothes, no teenage crushes or posts on social media and, on the internet she doesn’t exist, unlike almost all teenagers of today, her uniform items are the only clothes she now owns, apart from night attire, nothing else is needed, no social life and still living in the pack house under the scrutiny of the leadership.

It could be worse, she acknowledges to herself, if she’d never left, then she would be in the same position but marked by a male that was chosen for her, someone probably so much older or Delta Cole, whose eyes follow her in the most disturbing way when he’s around her.

All in all, her life was better than it could have been, always got to look on the bright side of life she laughed inwardly at the idea.

Today, she’s been called to the Alpha’s office, apart from training he’s been ignoring her, which in this pack is a good state to be in, it means you are at least at an acceptable level of performance, praise isn’t something you get from this Alpha, so being called in generally isn’t good.

Getting there at the same time as Robert and Michael, they exchange nods, not bothering to talk, they all know that none of them will know why they were called there, but since they haven’t been working together, it’s unlikely it’s because of a major screw up, which is at least, a comforting thought.

Technically Robert should be getting ready to take over the pack, but the current Alpha isn’t likely to step down anytime soon, he’s obsessed with power and stepping down means he has to give that up, so Robert is in a form of limbo, not allowed to be the Alpha, but always in training for the role.

The Alpha calls them in as a group, Toni automatically takes the last spot, as they file in by rank, closing the door behind her before she moves forward, standing to attention with the other two.

“Tomorrow the Royal Pack will be back to check on their ward.”

He stares at Toni so she drops her head, it’s something that will be used to punish her regularly, she’s aware of that, while she’s had one public punishment, there have been plenty of private ones, anything less than perfection in training is punishable.

“They are also asking to see how we do the ranking assessments they were impressed with the performance of the Trainee Gamma while she was in their pack.

Therefore, there will be an assessment for you all starting tomorrow.

When you leave this office, a Delta will be waiting to escort each of you.

You have one hour to collect any items you think you may need for your assessments, which will last three days.”

He sits back with a smug smile on his face

“At the end of the hour, you will be taken to the cells and will remain under guard until midday tomorrow.

Each of you will have the same set of exercises to test your skills, but we'll be looking for different qualities.”

He pauses his next line being delivered more as a threat.

“I expect you to do well and not let the pack down, remember failure has consequences.

Deltas are waiting for you outside to supervise your preparation, dismissed”

“Yes Alpha”

They say in unison filing out.

Once again Delta Cole, the youngest Delta, is assigned to Toni, she’s pretty sure she knows why, he’s the Alpha’s favourite he has a mean and cruel streak to him, so would be ideal, in the Alpha’s eyes, as her chosen mate.

Toni is a few months from turning fifteen and can’t think of anything worse, than having him hanging around her for the next few years, but at least she has a little over five years more of safety.

“Where first Trainee?”

“Armoury”

She has no plans to hold much of a conversation with him.

“What’s the plan, Trainee?”

Toni moves from place to place, not answering Delta Cole’s questions, knowing he’ll be reporting them all back to the leadership.

No throwing knives, bows or offensive weapons of any sort, choosing fresh uniform that won’t carry her scent, one of her own adapted backpacks, rope both thin and thick, pre-cutting them into various lengths; then up to her room for a few pieces of clothes, a cloak that she’s adapted to her needs, a container of chalk and a large human perfume bottle she owns.

Walking into the kitchen she throws some extra food and fruit into her bag for that night, sure that she won’t want to eat the prison food, in case it’s been doctored, she doesn’t trust the Alpha not to taint the food to weaken their performance.

“Take me to my cell”

She tells Cole finally breaking the silence between them.

“Is that all you are taking?”

There’s a sneer on his face as if she’s forgotten something important.

The patronising tone he uses annoys both her and her wolf, she may not be fifteen yet but she’s been in training for over a decade, definitely, not some pathetic pup who knows no better.

“Are you questioning me Delta?”

Her tone changes and he suddenly looks unsure of himself; Tyra seeps to the front letting out a command aura Toni didn’t know she had, watching almost as a third party in the interaction as he takes a step back.

“No Gamma, follow me please” he drops his head respectfully

“Better and don’t forget who you are speaking to” She answers as they pass the Beta, who is smirking at his reaction.

“Apologies Gamma,” he says respectfully.

He’s dropped the trainee out of respect, but she knows the Beta will have words with him over that, as a trainee, he outranks her, but the fact she can call forth a natural authority stronger than he can as a ranked wolf, makes her happy, she lets the smallest smile hit the side of her mouth.

Maybe there’s something to be said for keeping the same bloodline in a ranked position, or maybe it’s the Alpha blood that runs through her from her mum’s side after all, she was the third daughter of a neighbouring pack Alpha, either way, it’s good to know she can affect him like that.

Twenty minutes later Robert and Michael enter their respective cells, their backpacks are far fuller, and she can hear them chatting quietly, there’s too much Silver and Wolfsbane in here to allow mind linking.

She had removed her mattress and blankets, lying directly on the bed frame, but she saw Robert getting ready to get some sleep on the mattress so hissed at him.

Walking close to the bars to limit being heard and seen, her voice as quiet as she can go, because something as simple as helping someone out while in the cells, can be punishable in this pack.

“Wolfsbane”

She does a small sniffing motion, motioning to her cell, before heading back to the bare bed

Michael and Robert look at her cell, there are no walls, just silver-painted bars and they can see all the items she’d moved away from her before they start checking their cells.

Toni is concerned, that they will have to face tough opponents, like their fathers in a fight, and doing so with wolfsbane in their system will further weaken them

Maybe like her, they already dose themselves to build immunity or just don’t care.