Chapter 7 Never Want To Fall In Love
"Your father is determined to love me even if I'm the devil incarnate." Louis said exasperatedly while sitting on the sofa in the living room of Liam's flat.
Liam plopped his body beside Louis and gave him his usual Yorkshire tea. Louis drank his tea while Liam opened his canned beer and put the lid in the box that Louis had brought before drinking his drink. "It's like he was programmed to like me no matter what." Louis complained again.
It's true. It had been a month since they started sabotaging their engagement. Louis did everything that they know Liam's father wouldn't like, and it still has no effect. Geoff agreed with everything he said and the older Payne can also find excuses to Louis' uncouth behavior.
"Lucky you, it's better with my Dad because he's already getting slightly turned-off with you- with all your talks about business and profits. Have you seen how his face turned sour with you being a hardcore capitalist?" Louis said before drinking his tea.
Liam sighed. "But it's not enough if only your Dad will get turned-off. It needs to be both of them. Uncle Mark will not break the engagement if my father is still very determined."
At that moment, they both sighed at the same time.
"You're right. My father is programmed to like you no matter what. He'll accept you, not caring about what you are, just to fulfill Mom's promise."
Louis looked at Liam. What is it that he heard in Liam's voice? Was it bitterness laced with sarcasm?
"Well, it's really like that. Our dads love our moms very much." He said in a matter-of-fact tone.
"Yeah, loved them so much to the point that there's very little space in their hearts to love anybody else, even their own kid."
Louis halted at Liam's comment. He stared at him. There was a cold and defiant look in Liam's face. "That's not fair, Liam. They also love us." He replied. Liam shrugged.
"Maybe in your case. But that's not the case with my father." Liam said casually, like he was just commenting about the weather.
He chugged the beer from the can that he's holding. "The only person my dad loves is my mother. He only loves me because I am the son of the woman he loves."
Louis smiled. "You know, I think my situation is like that too. Dad always say that I look like Mommy. I guess that's true, looking at the pictures of my mom." His smile widened. "You should see our house. Anywhere you look, there's a picture of her."
He looked at Liam and stopped. Liam did something that Louis had always thought he was incapable of doing- smiling.
It was not a smirk, the sarcastic one that had been Liam's trademark or the practiced dazzling smile he had to cover his dark plans. The smile on Liam's lips right now was wishful, unguarded and genuine. And for some reason that he didn't understand, it felt painful for Louis.
"Lucky for you." Liam said as he looked away from him. "Your dad likes to look at you and be with you because in a way, he sees your mom in you. My situation is different. My father don't want to see me. It's painful for him to see the things that his loved one left. That's why all the pictures of my mom was removed from the house. He don't even want to talk about mommy- that's his way of love. He loves my mother to the core that knowing that she's gone is just too painful for him." He shook his head. "I never want to fall in love that hard." Liam's handsome face is serious. Louis drank from his tea cup again before thinking about Liam's words.
"You know, we're really opposites." Louis said softly. "Me? I want to experience falling in love that hard even if it means going through all those pains. I want to experience a lot of intense emotions. That's the point of living, isn't it? To feel? Or else, you merely existed."
Liam chuckled which caused Louis to pout. Is it right to laugh at him when he's all serious here? Asshole, he said in his mind.
"You really are the most idealistic person I've ever met. Sometimes I wish I can also think the way you do." Liam said, still smiling. This time, his smile was friendly and playful. Louis can't help but erase the pout on his face. "Why not try?" Louis said shrugging.
Liam smiled, shaking his head. Louis stretched his hand and massaged his neck weakly.
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"Muscle pains?" He heard Liam asked.
"Yeah. Yesterday, a friend of mine held his birthday at the orphanage and we played with the kids." He laughed upon remembering the children. "The kids were so hyper. We played all day long and it looks like my body was shocked." "Here, let me help you." Liam reached for Louis' shoulders and started massaging them gently. His fingers adeptly stroked the sore and tensed muscles of Louis' neck and shoulders.
"Wow, you're good." Louis leaned his head down to give more access to Liam's hands. "Where did you learn this?"
"My primary school teacher told us that massaging is a good way to relieve stress. I tried learning from books before."
"Hmm... why did you want to learn? Don't tell me, you're already perverted at a young age and you want to use massaging to turn girls on- ouch!" He shouted when Liam's fingers pushed hardly on his skin.
"I did it for my father." Liam said icily.
"Sorry. I'm just kidding." Louis said chuckling. Liam continued massaging his shoulders, prying his mind off of the way Louis' warmth seeped through his clothes and towards his working hands.
Louis caught eye of the airplane figurines that was hanging from one side of Liam's ceiling.
"Hey, Li, are those airplane figurines expensive? Luke- the boy that we saw and brought to the hospital was sent to a home and I was assigned to him. He said he wanted to be a pilot and there are a lot of kids who also wants to be a pilot. So I thought I could give them something like that as a present on Christmas."
"Yeah, those are expensive because they're custom-made. But if you want, I still have a lot of spare parts. I'll assemble it and I'll give it to you for a low price."
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Louis snorted. "Heh, and here I thought it's for free."
Now, it's Liam who snorted. "Wake up, Lou. There's nothing free in this world anymore. You're lucky I even gave you a discount."
Louis rolled his eyes. "Why do you have that many airplane models anyway? And you have spare parts too. And there are trucks and battleship models in the kitchen. Do you have a fixation on toys or something?"
"I wanted to be a toy designer." Liam said, continuously moving his hands on Louis' shoulders.
They were quiet for a few seconds.
"You wouldn't ask why I did not became a toy designer?" Liam broke the silence.
"No. I already know the answer." Louis simply replied.
"Huh, and what is it? That I don't have my own thinking and that I let my dad decide for my future?" Liam's sarcastic and defensive mode came back.
Louis shrugged. "No. I think you did that simply because you love your father." Liam's movement stopped. Their gazes met. "I'm correct, right?" Louis said, face and smile smug.
Liam just snorted again and continued massaging his shoulders. "Whatever." He said.