The Lost Siren: Rise of the Drakens, Book 1

I awoke abruptly, gasping. Benedict hovered over me, the smell of blood and death in the air. I tried to sit up, but his hands pushed me down. My neck, at least, felt better, but the rest of my body ached like I’d been dropped off the edge of the mountain.

His face lingered next to my ears, his voice a deadly whisper. “You’ve taken everything from me: my uncle, my nephew, my brother, my people, and my hope.”

His hand squeezed my neck, his fangs promising murder.

“ ‘S not true,” I protested weakly, unable to stop him as he grabbed my short sword from where it lay at my side.

“I should have known this would happen. I should have just left you there in that breeding manor. Like I had before,” he whispered.

My heart froze as his eyes filled with self-loathing. What? What did he mean, ‘like before’?

No. It didn’t matter. Benedict had seen more centuries pass than I could even imagine, of course he’d rant about things I couldn’t understand. I pushed it all away. I didn’t care. In the end it wasn’t about him. It was about me, and this journey I’d been on to embrace being free. I couldn’t control Benedict any more than I could control the sun.

“You’ve disrupted everything!” he exclaimed, his eyes wild. “For over six hundred years I’ve ruled my people the best I could, content in the knowledge I was doing the best I could. But no, I couldn’t help myself, could I? I had to see you, and at first glance you nearly send me to my knees with your eyes, with your scent! I was obsessed. I still am.”

I tried to jerk away, but he held me still. I spit into his face. “Then why, Benedict? Why didn’t you just leave me there?”

He snarled back at me. “You’re so ignorant of everything that it makes me want to scream. How could anyone be so unaware, so helpless?”

I writhed against him, but his hand across my neck squeezed lightly in warning as he said, “When I tasted your blood, I knew I was in trouble. I obsessed about it. I got in fights with the others for no reason, and every thought I had was just another scheme on how to make you bleed. Then you gave out a distress call, and I would have happily murdered every single one of my subjects for you.”

His hands slid down to grip my waist underneath the breeches, inching closer to that place that ached, that burned for him. Because, despite his hatred, despite his pain, I had never wanted anyone else in the world more than I wanted him at this moment.

“You liked it . . . liked being with me,” I whispered, a faint echo of hope stirring to life within my chest.

His lips twisted with disdain. “Just because I want you doesn’t mean I like you.”

It was a slap in the face, but it didn’t keep me from moaning as his tongue dragged across my neck, healing the little scrapes and lesions from the fight.

“You did something to me.” I panted, my mind spinning to rationalize everything I felt. “You made me drink your blood when I first came here, and now I make strange noises, and now—”

“Your every waking thought is of me? You can’t sleep, you can’t eat, and every muscle vibrates in anticipation of the feel of your skin against mine? Join the fucking party.” Then the anger left him suddenly, his chest heaving with exertion. “And now, I’ve failed my people in every way. The Overlord knows where we are, and the siren is still lost to us. I am a failure.”

My dagger gleamed as he held it in his hands, and in one horrifying moment I knew his intention.

“No, it isn’t your fault! None of this was your fault! Your uncle tries to murder you and take your people and it’s your fault? You’re fucking psychotic!”

The other drakens muttered at the tone of my voice, but Benedict grabbed me, and we disappeared.

He dropped me on the ground, and I was startled by the wind on my face. The sky above me pelted me with cold rain while the storm raged around us. Thunder roared, making it impossible to hear anything other than the fury of nature.

“Rhyfel’s sacrifice was simple,” Benedict began, yelling over the tempest. “The lost siren would be protected as long as I stayed away from her, as long as I refused to claim her. If I kept my people in this mountain, no one would know where she was. If I just kept away, she was safe.”

A small bit of my heart cracked, hearing him speak so fondly of anyone, even if it wasn’t me. It was a distraction from the pain riddling my body at least. I vaguely wondered why he was telling me this. He continued, a snarl marring his face.

“I fucked it up, as usual. I couldn’t stay away from her. I had to watch from a distance at first, to make sure she was there. Then the temptation grew too strong. I wasn’t strong enough. I’m still not.”

My muscles tensed, warning bells going off in my head. Adrenaline flooded my body, and I was able to ignore the pain enough to stand. More than the news that he not only knew she was alive, but where, my mind latched onto a small, more singular detail.

“You said you’re protecting the lost siren. Not the lost female, not the lost daughter, the siren.” My voice trembled even as the wind and rain pounded my body.

Benedict took a steadying breath. “Siren isn’t a real species. It’s just a myth given to the females who often defended the shores of Lyoness. It’s a silly human moniker, a pet name if you will—’

My heart froze. Siren. It was always that word, wasn’t it? “It’s your pet name for me.”

He didn’t deny it, just stared at me with that hooded gaze of his.

“Say it,” I challenged, starting to lose my grip on reality and consciousness.

Benedict’s eyes were everywhere but me, and that was telling. “What do you want me to say? That I’ve watched her die thirty-nine mortal deaths because I’m a goddamn coward?”

“You’re the last male on earth I’d call a coward. Prove it by telling me why you call me siren when she’s still out there.”

He closed the space between us in seconds, my short dagger still gripped in his hand. His body leaned against me even as he dropped it to the ground. We both fell to our knees, the raining soaking our skin. “I’d rather die than break the protections on her.”

And that was it, wasn’t it? It didn’t matter what I did for him or what I sacrificed. He’d always be in love with this mythical girl, wouldn’t he? He pushed the dagger between our chests, my sobs threatening to overcome me as my fingers joined his on the hilt. His words burned in my blood because for whatever fucked up reason, I loved Benedict. Even though it hurt, I loved him just as much as I loved Kieran and Ronan. Even though it was like trying to love the darkest depths of the ocean, an endless expanse of black and nothingness that would only suffocate you in the end.

Benedict’s eyes glowed in the darkness of the storm. “I hate you. I love her.”

It would be easy to push my dagger forward, easy to stop the hurtful words from spewing out of his mouth. But my life had never been easy, had it?

I closed my eyes and relaxed my grip. “As long as you’re alive and she’s alive, there’s always hope.”

Benedict shook his head, sending droplets of rain scattering around him.

“There is only one way to keep her safe forever, and after I do it, no one will ever claim her. I’m a coward, Wren. Most days I wished I had died with my father, with honor. Not reduced to trapping my own people in a prison, lying to keep us alive, and for what purpose?”

Benedict’s hands grasped mine around the dagger’s hilt, and for a moment, I was just happy to be this close to him. I never realized how badly I’d wanted him to be happy and content until right now, and his pain might be enough to break me.

“Could you ever love me?” I whispered, my heart sinking into my feet.

Our foreheads touched, and I knew something terrible was about to happen. His gaze pierced my soul as he caressed my cheek, a look of yearning so raw it stole my breath, preserving it forever as it hung in the space of this specific, fleeting moment. The rain continued to pound around us.

“Not while you look like this, siren.”

He’d said that to me once before, one of my first nights here. What did it mean?

With a jerk he plunged my dagger deep into his own chest, my fingers still entwined with his around the hilt. I screamed as we both fell to the ground, blood leaving his body in raging torrents as I fell on top of him. He refused to move his hand and the dagger enclosed in it, and my scream didn’t end; it modulated higher and higher, warping into the high keen of a raging distress call because it was so fucking obvious now even as I spat at the storm and howled my defiance to a hunk of stone that didn’t care. Rage and magick exploded around me, my pain only secondary to the sudden realization that changed everything.

I was the lost siren, and Benedict was trying to die to keep me a secret.

Another animalistic shriek left my throat, pain exploding throughout my body as scales erupted from my back with a vicious ripping sound, dotting my body with an iridescent, white color. With an inhuman cry, two wings shot from my shoulders, dripping blood and mucus. I went blind, then everything came back into focus in astonishing detail, from the scales on Benedict’s chest to the blood pumping over the ground he laid on. Claws shot out of my nail beds, black and sharp and foaming with a deadly poison.

Benedict stayed sprawled on the ground, breathing heavily but with a stupid, victorious smirk on his face. He pulled the dagger out with a wince and pulled me to him, and for only the second time I could recall kissed me. I forgot to breathe, not able to tell where the air began, and his kiss ended.

After the most blissful few minutes of my life, he pulled away. “Tricked you.”

His fangs drifted to my neck and bit down, his chest healing over as he greedily lapped at my blood. I growled and pulled him harder to me as he drank until a pull in my heartbeat twinged, and I tore myself away. His chest sported a nasty scar to match the ones on my face.

Kieran’s words floated back to me, and I blushed. What had he said? “A knife directly to his heart won’t kill him unless he wishes to die.”

“My stupid little siren,” Benedict whispered against my cheek.

I laughed even as I held Benedict carefully between my new claws, reveling at the iridescent, white scales that ran all over my body. Soft, white scales dotted my wrists and neck, leading to wings that shared the same astonishingly pure color. Benedict devoured the sight of me, emotions of shame and euphoria wafting off him to form a sickly aura. Was this part of being a draken, sensing emotions?

“I am a coward, but I don’t care,” he said.

I tried to think, but my mind was nothing but new animal instincts screaming at me.

Benedict’s nose found my neck, and I decided I didn’t care if he had manipulated me into realizing the truth, and I didn’t care if he didn’t even like me. Maybe he only wanted me as the lost siren, but I needed him like the night sky needed the stars, like the spring needed winter in order to bloom. He stroked the white scales on my wing, and I purred. It was one of the most exquisite things I’d ever felt in my life. The sound acted as a catalyst, and Benedict drove me into the ground with the force of his body.

My new draken instincts screamed with indignation, roaring for me to not give up without a fight. They overtook my human brain, and I didn’t recognize Benedict. I saw one large, unmated, male draken. I wriggled out of his grasp and fled, leaping off the top of the mountain and spreading my wings in joy. My wings flared and pumped hard to get ahead of the larger draken, and then I was in the air, soaring along the mountain range in victory. The storm was over, the clouds clearing away to reveal a sun that was dipping below the horizon, coating my white scales in fire. My exhilaration was so complete, I didn’t notice him gaining distance until he slammed into me, knocking the wind from my lungs and sending us both towards the side of the mountain.

I shrieked and raked him across the face with my claws, and the skin bubbled and frothed where my poison worked its way into his blood. He dropped me in pain, and I roared in victory. I dove hard for an outcropping of rocks, planning to use a feint to send him crashing into the stones below. The draken growled and caught up again, even as blood ran down into his eyes. He grabbed one of my legs and yanked, sending me careening into the side of the cliff, and I was momentarily stunned by the hard impact. He used my moment of weakness to flip me over, pressing my face and stomach hard against the stone. His claws hovered at my neck, his large body pinning down my arms and legs. I was trapped.

I gave a fearful warble, and his claw traced down my spine. He sniffed the back of my neck deeply, frowning at the two large scars he saw. The rough pads of his tongue licked across them, and I cried out in confusion and need.

He stroked my neck softly, the hard surface of his claws cold against my skin. “Mine.”

A soft growl left my throat. I belonged to no one.

He pushed my body harder into the rocks, his wings straining to keep both of us in the air. “Mine.”

I twitched, unable to thrash against him like I wanted. His fangs hovered above the veins in my throat and I froze, survival instincts taking over. His hands roved over my body, pausing again to stroke the delicate skin in between my wings. I gave a tortured moan of pleasure, and he chuckled darkly against my ear. My draken instincts grudgingly admitted this one would make a powerful mate: large, strong, and able to protect our young. Our young? I trilled in confusion, and his voice was next to my ear once more. My body released a signal, a waft of pheromones potent to any draken unfortunate enough to be near, and the large draken’s muscles went rigid against me. I wanted him as my mate.

We disappeared in a wisp of black smoke, the roar of the wind still ringing in my ears and landed in a hot spring that was deep within the recesses of the mountain. The water scalded my skin after the bitter cold of the mountain, and I hissed as my body slipped beneath the surface. After a few moments, I adjusted and let my new muscles stretch as the water wiped away the last vestiges of the battle. The draken with me watched me with hooded eyes as I threw my body under the large waterfall overhead. I leaned my head back, arching my back to bend underneath its powerful current.

The draken grabbed me, tilting my hips as he plunged into me from behind, both of us feral and beyond any rational thinking. I screeched as he filled me, intense pleasure surging through my core as he roared his own satisfaction. The water pounded down my body, running in rivulets as his skin slid slickly against my own. Our scales flashed in the dim torchlight, his hands hooking under my armpits and pulling me flush against his pelvis.

My claws reached back and caught his neck, neither of us caring as the water washed away the blood welling from the fresh wounds. His fangs sank into my shoulders as I bucked against him. It was exquisite having him dominate every aspect of my body, and a satisfied rumble grew in my throat. He laughed, one hand yanking down on my hair to keep my back arched under the pounding of the water. He nudged me to the ground, my hands grasping at the edge of the pool as he withdrew from me. I couldn’t help the growl of disappointment that left me, and with one jerk he had me turned around, my back pressing into the edge of the pool as his gaze bore into mine.

His black hair fell into his eyes, lost in pleasure as he thrust again into me, quickly settling into a pattern, in and out, in and out. My breath caught as his rough tongue swiped at my nipple, his fingers teasing and stroking my center in perfect time with his thrusts. The raging fire in my core ready to explode. My body thrummed in glorious, tangible anticipation as I came closer to an invisible edge, half delirious with pleasure and uncertainty.

Was I going to be sick?

He took my free breast into his mouth, biting down, then he was drinking from it, two small pinpricks of blood running down my chest as all his injuries began to close. I moaned in desperation, the tension inside of me close to reaching its peak. I moved frantically against him, trying desperately to scratch some sort of internal itch as it came closer and closer, until finally—

I screamed as my body exploded, a strange, animalistic screech that came from some unknown depths of my body. Every nerve flooded with euphoria, and my mind went blank as I moved against him. His eyes went feral when he saw the absolute bliss on my face, our sounds harmonizing into a sound that stole my remaining breath. As my inner muscles spasmed around him, he gripped my shoulders, holding me against the wall as his thrusts lost any semblance of a pattern. He pounded into me like a wild animal, and I never felt more alive or beautiful in my entire life. His tightly wound demeanor was utterly undone while inside of me, and it was thrilling.

He finished with a tortured gasp, clutching me so hard I knew I’d have bruises if his blood didn’t heal them first. The fang marks on my shoulder bled furiously as he came, his member swelling and catching inside of me. He held me there for a few moments, both of us panting as we chased our own highs. Then he pulled out of me and dropped me to the ground. I wobbled on shaky legs, healed but also used in a way that was so utterly satisfying.

“I wasn’t strong enough to live without you. I’m still not,” he said.

My new instincts were angry. Why was I not good enough for this draken? I was the last female! He should be on bended knee begging me for the honor of my company! I tried to wriggle away, hissing. He held me into place long enough to lick the marks on my shoulder until they healed over.

He let go, his shoulders slumped in defeat. “It wasn’t supposed to be like this. None of this.”

My wings fell. My head tilted to the side. My mate was sad. My anger vanished, and I tucked myself into his body, curling my wings around him and putting my face into his neck. I trilled reassuringly, but his wet tears dropped into my hair as he clutched onto me. My own human mind fought back against the draken instincts until my wings retracted and my claws disappeared. My human form was familiar enough, with only a telltale shimmer of my skin any testament to my change.

I forced my own mind forward, shoving my new draken instincts to the back. My palms hit the stone floor of the cave as I fell forward on my knees, gasping. After all this time . . . I’d been a draken all along?

My entire life had been nothing but pain and misery, and this was the only life I could remember! I couldn’t comprehend the horrific ends I’d probably met in the past. No one in the breeding house lived long, enchanted blood magick or no.

I was a slave. And I was a draken.

Benedict’s words from that very first night drifted back to me. You are not a slave. You were an enslaved person.

Clever boy. He knew the difference because he felt it himself—the chains of our own minds were the worst of all. I wasn’t simply enslaved as a human but enslaved through the blood magick that kept me oblivious to my heritage. Enslaved to the whims of a draken king who knew the only way to keep me safe was to keep me hidden. Enslaved because if I was hidden, his people wouldn’t die.

If I wasn’t a slave, then that begged the final question. Who was I?

Wren. Draken born and human raised. Queen of a people I knew nothing about.

A low moan escaped me.

No. Stop.

Choices. It all came back to choices. I could choose to be overwhelmed. I could choose to cry, and tear my hair, and curse the day I ever agreed to go with Benedict. I could choose to hate him for how he’d treated me and vow to leave and never see him again.

I won’t, though.

I’d spent my whole life hiding: from Crullfed, from the men who frequented the breeding house, and even from the drakens when I first arrived here. I was done hiding.

Benedict was talking again. He was crying. Benedict didn’t cry. I blinked, trying to focus on what he was saying.

“Word will get out that I’ve found you. The Overlord will come for you. I did that,” he said.

Indignation welled in my chest as I broke through my animalistic haze to find my voice. “How long have you known it was me?”

His eyes were red, tears streaming down his face. “Over five hundred years.”

Oh my gods. I pushed him away, not understanding, not comprehending.

Benedict talked quickly as if the more words he used, the more likely I was to understand his reasons. “After Rhyfel died, a vampyre somehow survived the blast of black magick. She . . . she picked you up as a drakling and ran through the forest, taking you to Crullfed’s. When I had healed from my wounds, I tracked your scent and the scent of the vampyre who’d taken you there. Days passed before I was healed enough to track you to the breeding house. I caught your kidnapper unaware. She was Crullfed’s daughter, and I spared her life if Crullfed didn’t ask questions about the human who would die, then show up on his doorstep as a baby again and again. He knew as well as I did that if the Overlord found out he’d been hiding a magical human, he’d be tortured hideously, so he had no choice but to keep quiet.”

I flexed my hands, remembering the claws that had been there moments earlier. “I’m the lost siren, yet you resented me . . . hated me even.”

He swiped at the water, sending sparkling droplets everywhere.

“I resented not having a choice. Nothing is as it should be.” His face crumpled, his expression pained. “There was no courtship, no claiming ceremony, and no celebration with friends and family. I am forced to mate with you, so our species survives, and that is what I hate. I wanted to wait until our species was strong and had our homeland back. Then I would raise you in our culture and reveal your identity. I grew impatient and too afraid to wait any longer.”

He hung his head, and I knew I needed to distract him from his own morose thoughts. I stepped out of the pool, uncaring of my naked body. My enhanced eyes took in the glowing stones set into the walls with magick, something my human eyes had never noticed.

“You didn’t act like anyone was forcing you a few minutes ago.”

“I just wanted a choice!” he snapped back.

Then I lost it. “Choice? You dare speak to me about choice? You chose to kidnap me and then treat me like garbage. You chose to stalk me, wearing down my defenses until I couldn’t think about anything except your body against mine and hating myself for it because of how much you hated me. You chose to sit in this mountain and do absolutely nothing for centuries while your people despaired, and your blood relatives turned against you because of your inaction. Don’t you dare talk about choice to me.”

My shoulders were heaving, quivering with rage. He took a step towards me, but I held out a clawed hand, shifting unconsciously back into my draken form. I wanted it to become as familiar to me as my human one.

“I didn’t choose to be kidnapped, but here I am. I didn’t choose the draken people at first, but I still fought and bled with them. I didn’t choose to be the lost siren, but I accept you, Benedict. I love you . . . for all the good it will do me.”

I took a deep breath as he flinched, pain spreading across his face.

I crumpled, my heart breaking into a thousand tiny pieces. “Would it really be that bad to love me?”

Turning, not wanting to see his reaction, I continued, “I’m leaving this mountain and

taking any drakens who wish to come now that the curse is broken. We will return to Lyoness and ward it with magick and rebuild our race. I choose to help the draken race because sometimes what I want isn’t what matters most. I guess I’ll have to thank several dozen lifetimes as a human for that lesson.”

Benedict stood stonily, not reacting. I spread my wings and imagined the grand entrance hall. Benedict lunged towards me, but his hands only grasped air.