The Kings Mate

My stomach is sending shooting pains throughout my body, weakening it more than it already is. Ellie’s arms are tight around my hips, her fingers hooked through the belt loops of my jeans trying to stop me from moving from the lounge and towards the locked doors that leave the suite.

Something strong inside of me is forcing me to go to Ryder. There is a small niggling at the back of my mind that doesn’t want him in the centre of whatever danger is going on outside those doors. I don’t want him to get hurt.

I can’t lose him.

Ellie’s strength lapses for the smaller of a second and I tumble to the floor. Whatever state of mind I am in. It isn’t what I normally experience and I try to push myself up and closer to the door, closer to Ryder.

When I try to push myself up my strength falters and it is Reynolds that has to pick me up off the floor. His grip is strong and warm but he can’t stop the pain I feel and he definitely can’t stop the shakes that are starting to conquer my body.

I’m screaming at him to let me go or to call Ryder up here and away from what is going on. “Lottie,” his voice is loud fighting to be heard over mine. “He’ll be all right Lottie. He’s the strongest King we have ever had he can protect himself and it’s our job to make sure that you are safe.”

“I need to go to him.” the words are a quiet sob as they leave my mouth.

Reynolds grunts when I get kick in just above his crotch area but his grip doesn’t loosen his hold on me at all. “You need to be protected over him.” His voice comes out in a little growl and his hands tighten around me. “If you do not stop struggling you will open your wound and Ryder will kill me for it, so please stop before I have to sedate you.”

My body goes slack at the idea of him being close to me with the idea that he would do that to me. That’s when the shaking takes over my body and the painful memories resurface in my mind.

Reynolds seems to notice what he’s done and his voice is stressed as he starts to reassure me that I’m safe. As he begins to argue with Charlie I block it all out and his kind words that made me so uncomfortable in that unforgiving house take over.

His face has never plagued my mind until now and having him back there is even more uncomfortable than having him standing in front of me. I don’t want him controlling my life like he does.

My eyes are closed and Reynolds is beginning to struggle holding me. I can feel that he’s trying to keep them squarely on my waist, not moving further up to hold me over the cut and not moving down to a place that I desperately try to hide and deep away from the opposite sex.

A deep growl enters the room and Reynolds loosens his grip enough that he is still holding me up and stopping me from getting away again. The growl continues to echo through the room and I can hear Ellie whisper something before footsteps leave the room, the doors closing behind whoever left.

Soft fingers tickle underneath my jaw and I exhale out a shaky breathe releasing the tension that I feel in my chest.

“Lottie?” It’s Ryder’s voice.

When I open my eyes I’m met with Ryder’s hazel even with mine. My eyes move quickly down his body to see that he is only wearing a pair of dark grey shorts that are slung so low on hips I can see the defined lines of hips that disappear beneath the material.

He had shifted before this. The fight was over.

My hands that had been pushing at Reynolds hold stop and they grab at Ryder’s neck as I pull myself against him. I don’t know why I do so, but I just want to have his arms wrapped around me knowing that it will be the way to calm me down.

Ryder seems shocked by my movement but he drops his fingers from my jaw to replace Reynolds arms around my waist pulling me in closer to his chest. I hear Reynolds and Ryder exchange something in Jordanian they even give each other small growls before the door opens and closes telling me that Reynolds has left the room leaving me and Ryder alone.

His face still plagues me mind and the shaking is still controlling my body but Ryder’s hand running through my hair as he keeps a steady grip around my waist. His chin is resting on top of my head and I can feel his breathe stirring up the thin broken hair’s there.

He isn’t saying anything. Just holding me and I am beginning to fear what will happen when he lets go. He has a mate out there somewhere and it isn’t me. I don’t want him to hurt me like he hurt the other women he was with. It won’t be the same as he did with the two that betrayed his touch and the love that he already feels for the girl he will spend the rest of his life with but as soon as he lays his eyes on her I know my heart will break.

I need to stop the feelings that I have for him before they get any stronger than what they already have. It will never end well if I don’t.

Ryder’s fingers come down to cup my jaw so he can angle my face up towards his. His breathe moving over my tremoring lips now.

“Are you okay?” his voice is soft as his eyes watch my lips.

He gives me a small sensitive smile when I can’t answer seeming to understand that I am not okay but standing in his arms makes it all bearable. He leans in closer, his hand sliding from my hair to cup around the back of my neck gently.

My eyes dart to his lips thinking he is about to kiss me but when they lightly brush over mine and an electric shock shots down my spine so strong that I don’t think I can stand on my own legs anymore he twists to bury his head in my neck, exhaling a deep breathe over my warmed skin.

A small kiss is pressed to my skin just above my collar bone by his sensual lips, and I think I let out a small moan as he does and I drop my head down onto his shoulder as he whispers something lightly in Jordanian. He only keeps his head there for a second before he pulls back his arms loosening their grip around me.

My feet are steady beneath me now and it took me a while to realise that the shakes had stopped and the pain in my ribs have all but disappeared and it happened when his breathe was moving over my lips. He seems to have tensed up now but his grip is still sure. It’s always sure.

“Maybe talking about it will help because whatever is happening is getting worse.” His eyes are attempting to subtly move over my body, checking my sanity.

“I don’t want anything to do with him.” My voice is shaky as I reply and try to step back away from him.

He holds me tighter when I try to move. “You can’t keep this bottled up Lottie. You can talk to me about it or I can get Riley too, even Reynolds. He understands you on a level I will never be able to”

Whatever he means about Reynolds understanding me I have no idea. I’m comfortable around him but not as comfortable as I am around Ryder.

“I-I would rather talk to you.” My fingers tap nervously over his bicep as I try to avoid his eyes.

“Will you?” he asks more in a soft order that I don’t know if I’ll be able to wiggle my way around.

Ryder sighs and drops his hand down lifting my shirt up quickly. I gasp and grip his hand between both of mine, his eyes snap up to look at me but he doesn’t move his hand. When I move my eyes down to where his hand is he moves it to wipe gently over where the cut is. Even through the bandage I can feel the warmth and the calming feeling that I get from it.

“It doesn’t hurt does it?” I shake my head at him and he drops my shirt back down. I can see that he is unsure if I’m being truthful or not.

“Wait here and I’ll take you somewhere.” He gives my waist a squeeze before he walks into the bedroom.

I feel the familiar tightness come back to my chest as I watch the muscles of his bare back flex. “This is your room isn’t it?”

He freezes and turns back to look at me with a rise of his eyebrows. My shoulders shrug as I answer his silent question. “It smells like you.”

He smiles at me but it drops quickly and he looks around the room trying to avoid my eyes. “You understand why you’re in here right? This is one of the strongest protected rooms in the castle. I don’t want you getting hurt. Not many rebels got past today but if they do they won’t be getting anywhere near you.”

“They don’t want me, do they?” my gulp is audible.

He sighs and forces a smile onto his face. “They want to get to me and the best way for them to do it is through you.” His voice is grime.

My hands start shaking again at my sides and I give him a small nod as I take a seat down on the lounge. Ryder seems reluctant to move from where he’s standing but eventually his eyes leave me and he makes his way into the bedroom and I’m guessing towards his closet.

When he comes back he crouches down in front of me taking my hands that are shaking in my lap. He holds them tightly and it hurts a little but I enjoy the warm tingles that he causes.

“Lottie, look at me.” my eyes met his and I can see that his are watering a little. “You are my priority they will not get anywhere near you, not without me getting to them first.”

His hands are still wrapped around mine and he uses that as leverage to pull me up off the lounge. I freeze when he begins to lead me towards the now open doors leading out of the suite. Charlie and Reynolds are leant against the door frames looking as if there having a private conversation over listening to the one me and Ryder are having.

I’m not sure why but I’m suddenly scared to leave the room knowing now that someone is trying to kill me.

“It’s ok.” Ryder says with a squeeze of my hand. “I’m going to show you a secret. Something only a handful of people has ever seen before.”

My head snaps towards him when he says that, just as I get a glimpse of a smile creeping on to both of my guards faces. I got to ask him why he’s taking me there before he gives a shake of his head telling me not to.

He drops one of my hands pulling me in close to his side as he leads me out of the room. I can feel that he’s holding me close as he takes me down the stairs and when I look up at him I can see that his eyes are concentrated on my stomach as if he is waiting for me to show some pain from the injury I sustained.

I’m surprised when he leads me down to the bottom floor of the castle. His grip is the only thing that’s leading me straight or preventing a hazardous trip as my eyes are concentrated on the massive Olympic sized pool on my left barley listening as he tells me that’s it only one of the three pools spread across the large acreage of the grounds.

He stops at a set of dark heavily wooded doors that has a very stern looking guard stood in front of them. He gives me a look up and down and Ryder lets out a savage growl his hand tightening around my hand and pulling me in impossibly closer to his side.

The guard quickly looks back up to Ryder and nods at him and steps to the side to open the door for us. Ryder doesn’t loosen his hold as he continues past the guard and out to one of the most amazing things I have ever witnessed other than his Greek god carved muscled chest.

It is a small courtyard; at least compared to the rest of the manicured gardens. The high hedges signal the edge of the jaw dropping area that is probably even bigger than my suite. There’s lots of lush green tall trees in one corner that leads in to a dusting of pale green ground foliage with perfectly placed clumps of lavender. What I find most amazing about the area is the small stone bed creek broken up by some little waterfalls and the small unlit fairy lights that bind the bare tree trunks.

Ryder gives a small tug of my hand as he pulls me over the stone path, past the two seated table surrounded by lanterns hidden partially amongst the flowers and over towards a double circular black wicker lounge chair that looks like it could actually be an egg.

“Here.” He says while I’m distracted with what’s in front of me.

When I look back at him he’s sliding his hand around to his back. He laughs lightly at what I’m guessing is not a very pretty face as he pulls my book out of the waistband of his jeans. “Ellie told me about how she was helping you and if you want there’s a tutor I can get for you.”

My hands move slowly as I take my book. He knows. I didn’t want him to know because I didn’t want to see how he would react to it. When my eyes look up to meet his I can see that his eyes are softly watching me no hint of the disgust or embarrassment that I thought I would get instead I think I see something like love.

“Think about it ok.” He says after a while when I don’t answer him.

His hand takes my elbow as he gently slides me back into the soft cushy chair. I can fell the warmth he radiates when he sits down next to me in the enclosed area. There’s distance between us and I’m a little glad so that the strong emotions that are trying to force me from my spot over into his lap, my arms wrapping tightly around his neck to hold him to me hopefully won’t happen.

He’s sitting more up right with his back against the curved back of the chair with his legs crossed over in front of him, where my head is rested on the pillow with my legs stretched out. The seat is both wide and long enough that even Ryder with his six foot plus height he could lie down anyway and still fit.

When his phone begins to ring in his pocket he sighs but when I expect him to answer it he just switches it to silent and chucks it down near his feet instead of dropping it back into his pocket.

“Why didn’t you answer it?” I ask without thinking.

He looks down at me meeting my eyes for a second before he looks down to watch my hands that are fiddling with the front page of the book. Already the cover has started to peel off a little from my nervousness from thinking about Ryder.

“I blocked them out of my mind so they shouldn’t be trying to contact me, especially while I’m in here.” He says lowering himself down so he’s at more of an eye level with me.

“You blocked them out of your mind?” I ask curiously my fingers stopping there new attack of the spine as I grow that little bit more relaxed and comfortable.

“All wolves have a mind-link so we can communicate telepathically. I can get in to all wolves heads without much of a push but other than that you can only talk with those in your pack.” He explains with a shrug of his shoulders like this amazing thing is nothing.

My curiosity is peaked with the new information and he has to remind me to take a breath when I shot out question after question.

“So it’s harder for them to get into your mind because you’re the king but what does it feel like? Is anyone trying to get in now?” My voice rises a little in pitch as I try to contain my excitement.

Ryder lets out a small chuckle and the harmonic sound tints my cheeks with warmth. “I can feel Maxon pushing to get in now but there was more before but depending on the rank of the wolf trying to get in depends on how strongly I get the sensation of someone pushing at my head.”

I just smile up at him not saying anything and he seems perfectly content with the silence between us but after a while I break the look and turn back to open my book and continue from where I left off.

When Ryder’s fingers brush over my temple I nearly moan out in pleasure. “I can’t get into your mind but I can see how much whatever memory that you have scares you. If I could I would take them away and replace them with a happy one but I can’t.”

His fingers continue to caress their way down the side of my face till he reaches my jaw and angles my face up towards his that has moved closer to mine in the small moments of silence. His breath cool and minty as it fans over my cheeks.

“Tell me what happened and I’ll try to make it all stop.” He whispers finally my eyes flicking down to his lips to watch as every word escapes the lushness of them.

With a deep swallow I build up the courage to tell him hoping that he’s right that when I get it off my chest I will feel better and that just maybe he’ll be able to replace it with something worthy.

When he sees that my hands have begun to shake again, he takes them and slides down to lie closer to me. I feel his hand twitch around mine but he doesn’t move it, he just grips it tighter to stop the little muscle flex.

“I was fourteen when the police came and removed me from the last foster home I was in before I escaped Carlett.” My eyes are already beginning to water but Ryder doesn’t break the contact. “I’d been there for only a couple days but it was the first time I had actually been alone with the dad. He was always looking at me and playing with his pants while he did, and when he took my hand and asked for me to come into his bedroom.”

Ryder cut’s me off with a growl but he tells me to continue with a tense voice. “I was so scared. He pushed me down onto the bed and got on top of me. The entire time I felt what he was doing was right. His touch was soft and not at all forceful. He was telling me that it was right and that was how I was expressing my feelings for my dad that if I was good he would adopt me.”

Ryder’s hands are shaking and when he drops them. I think the dam of tears that are building up at the back of my eyes will explode without his touch but I notice that his hands are shaking more than mine and that his claws have extended back out. When his fingers wrap themselves through the belt loops of my jeans, pulling me in closer to him. Having him this close to me means that I can rest my hands on his chest and I can feel the hammering of his heart.

“I didn’t stop him as he unzipped my jeans I knew I needed to, that what he said was wrong and so was what he was doing but a part of me wanted a home and a family. He pulled off my shirt and seconds later he was being pulled off me. A female officer was quick to wrap one of the sheets around me, her words were what really made me realise that none of what happened was my fault.”

“Something like that isn’t in your control. Nobody should have ever broken your trust like that, not at that age.” Ryder’s pulling me in even closer to him and despite how I know what we’re talking about should make what he’s doing uncomfortable for me, I find myself savouring in the touch. “What happened to him?”

“He was arrested. He was raping his wife and blackmailed her into marrying him. He had raped two other foster girls before me and I would have been next if they hadn’t been investigating one of the other girls. He got four hundred years for what he did, he’s never getting out.” I whisper just before I drop my head to his chest, hiding my face.

“He should have been killed for what he did.” Ryder seethes his chest rumbling beneath my ear.

I didn’t think he needed to be killed. What he did was wrong and he’s been punished for it by spending the rest of his life behind bars. It’s becoming clear that this was what Ryder believes. I can’t blame him it’s the way he was raised and how his race lives and I can see what crimes they found punishable by death. Ryder himself is very protective of women.

Ryder’s hands are slow and unsure as he wraps them around my waist closing the last of the distance between us. “How old are you now Lottie?”

The way he asks the question I’m unsure whether he wants to know the answer or not. Theo told me that Ryder was twenty three and his birthday was in late June. There was an age difference between us, not a massive one but it was still wider than what most people considered normal and accepted.

When I was I found in that park there was nothing to identify who I was, not even a countless number of blood test could find a birth certificate. My birthday was narrowed down to be somewhere in between late November and early October by how far along my physical development was when they found me.

“I’m seventeen now but I turn eighteen in about two months.” I try to angle my head to look up at him but he’s tightened his grip.

“You’re young. If they couldn’t identify you, you belong to the United Kingdom government. By law they have the right to take you back because you’re underage.”

My fingers wrap themselves around the neck of Ryder’s shirt and that’s when all the tears I’ve been holding in come out. Ryder’s grip becomes sure around me as he tells me that he won’t let me go back to any of them, this is my new home and they can’t take me.

It takes half an hour for me to calm down enough that I can stop crying. Ryder didn’t once loosen his hold on me. His hands have been warmly moving up and down my back his fingers massaging against my spine.

When I told him that I was feeling better he let me pull back but I was still close to him. He had lied out on his back with a foot of space between us but his hand closest to me had found its way beneath my shirt, his skin rubbing against mine just above the line of my jeans.

His phone wouldn’t stop vibrating after our conversation and he had turned it off completely shoving it into his back pocket. I’m guessing that Maxon really wants to talk to him but Ryder is ignoring him.

I had gone back to reading my book and Ryder seemed to notice when I stopped on a line that I couldn’t get. He helped me with the words unlike Ellie who just told me what it was. He spelt it out for me, explaining the sounds of the words and how I could spell one out myself without asking.

The sun is filtering through the top of the chair and when I look over at Ryder now, he’s asleep. It’s restless even now and his eyes open minutes later with a deep sigh. He gives me a quick look before he rubs his hand up over his face.

“Would you like me to order lunch for down here or go back up to the suite for it?” his voice is dead as he sits back up in the seat.

“I like it here. It’s peaceful.” I give him a smile and he gives me one back.

Ten minutes later the same tall blonde women that I saw on my first day and in one of the gold framed pictures in the hall of kings and queens walks into the room with a tray of food balancing perfectly on her hand.

My eyes look Ryder up and down as he takes in his mother’s presence with a scowl.

When she reaches the chair she places the tray down near my feet. “Sweetheart, Maxon is about to have a fit. I’ll keep her company.” She says in a soft voice with a smile towards me.

She takes a seat on the edge of the chair, smoothing out her lilac dress that flows off her body but the silver embroidered corset vest hugs to the every little curve of her waist. Her eyes are on Ryder and the smile she has is taunting him to do as she says.

“I won’t be too long Lottie.” He sighs pushing himself up. “My mother is relatively harmless.”

Ryder walks out of the garden and his mum has a satisfied look on her face as she watches him leave. Her blonde wavy hair is pulled up and sits on top of her head in some magnificent arrangement that contrasts with her eyes and dress.

Her movements are elegant as she sit’s where Ryder just was with her legs bent back behind her as she leans herself down on the pillows sliding the food tray up between us.

“Hello Lottie, it’s nice to finally get to talk to you. Ryder seems to disappear off enough to be with you that I finally get a chance to meet the girl that holds so much of his attention. My name’s Allie.”

She’s sweet. I can see it in her smile. It’s similar to Ryder’s but not quite. Her voice is soft, with the hardness to it that could deliver orders. My eyes wonder down to her neck and there sitting on the left side a little higher up then the crevice of her collar bone is a mark. Darker than what Ellie’s is but still could be passed off as a slight skin imperfection on an already perfect canvas.

I nod at her not really knowing what to say to her. She seems confident with herself and starts to question me but not to overwhelming. She’s asking me about how I’m liking it in the castle and how different it is from what I had before but she isn’t push me for answers when I freeze up.

“How are you and Ryder going?” She asks taking a sip of her drink.

There’s a small tightness in my chest and I find myself looking towards the door waiting to see if he’ll come back through and back to me.

“Me and Ryder?”

“Yes.” She laughs, “You two spend a lot of time together and I just want to know how you feel towards him.” Her fingers are warm as they take mine. “I won’t tell him anything that you say. I’m just curious.”

“He has a mate out there somewhere. I don’t want to start feeling something for him then have him just drop me.”

“Royal wolves usually find their mates while there young. Alexander was nearly nineteen when he found me and that was on the verge of being late. It’s rare for royal them to meet their mates out of their teens. I understand what you mean though, I felt like that with Alex. I recognised him before he recognised me and for a split second I was worried that he was going to reject me. He was a prince and I was a pack wolf.” A small smile creeps its way onto her face. “That didn’t stop him from moving so quick across the room and grabbing me around the waist, lifting me up and claiming me right then and there.”

“Is that what happens all the time?” Her face loses the sentimental look as she gives me a curious one.

“No. Royal wolves are very strong and their wolves are very dominate, there very forceful on getting there claim on as soon as possible. She-wolves these days are more independent and are making their mates work for it more. Maxon is two years older than Ellie. They’ve grown up with each other so when Maxon shifted at thirteen and recognised her she was only eleven. Both of their parents decided that it would be better to keep them separated till she had shifted. So he had to wait two years to claim her. It’s all different depending on the wolves.”

“What would Ryder do?”

“If you haven’t noticed Ryder is very sensitive to your feelings and your emotions. He would do anything for that girl to be alright no matter how much his wolf forces him to take what’s his”

“Mum, this isn’t a suitable conversation to be having with her.” Ryder’s voice startles me and my cheeks warm in seconds knowing he heard what we talking about.

Allie rolls her eyes and gets up from the lounge. “Give it a chance sweetheart.” She whispers before exciting the courtyard and taking the now empty tray of food with her.

Ryder doesn’t sit back down. He watches his mother’s back, his arms crossed over his chest emphasizing the muscles in his arms stretching the thin grey material of his shirt. When he turns back to me the questioning look he has on his face is intimidating and I feel only a light bit of uncomfortableness from it.

“What is it?” I ask with a soft voice, trying to relax the anger that seems to beginning to claim him.

Ryder scrutinizes me before he answers. “Nothing, my mother just shouldn’t have said what she did to you.”

He’s still watching me carefully his body language tells me that he’s annoyed but his eyes are soft as he continues to watch me carefully but he’s starting to make me uncomfortable.

“Can I go back up to the room now?” He said he’d never be angry with me but it seems like he is and I don’t like the feeling that it gives me.

“You don’t have to leave Lottie.” He moves back up next to me, moving to take my hand but then second guessing it. “Don’t worry about what I said.”

His voice is beginning to waver in fear. The big bad King is scared of me, a defenceless human really. The difference between us in power doesn’t stop the blush that covers my cheeks when I realise that maybe he fears a bad opinion of him I may have.

“I’m tired, Ryder. I want to go have a rest.”

“You aren’t hurting are you?” His hands are quick to move to my shirt but when my fingers land softly on them, they stop.

Tremors run through his body and he has to shake them out before he takes my hand, telling me that he’ll take me back up to the room. He says something low about having to get to whatever Maxon wanted.

He’s back to being annoyed. The feeling is rolling of him and it’s targeted all at him. He shouldn’t be feeling this. It’s about his mate. From what I can guess he doesn’t choose when he finds her it just happens. He shouldn’t be beating himself up about it and I should be savouring the time I have with him without her around.

Reynolds and Charlie are following close behind us as Ryder nearly stalks us back up to his room. There’s more than my safety being the reason behind why I’m in there. The courtyard we were just in was the King’s courtyard and only he is allowed in there and those he gave permission. The guard on the door didn’t want to let me in because I was human and that was Ryder growled at him.

I think I’m afraid to admit the reasoning behind all this to myself that my subconscious has buried it deep down so I wouldn’t have to deal with the stress of it alongside the memories of my previous foster father.

Warm tingles that have become regular when Ryder’s skin makes contact with mine disappear as he drops my hand to close the doors of the suite leaving it so only Ryder and I are in the room. The muscles in his back flexing as he braces his body weight against it not turning around to look at me.

“Ryder.” My voice is strained along with the feeling in my chest that my rapid beating heart is trying to get through.

“Your touch, your voice, your eyes,” His voice is muffled by the door but he’s turned to look at me now and I can see the pain in his eyes. “You’re so much more than I expected.”

I’m standing no more than a foot away and I don’t even have time to think about what he said before his hand is wrapped around my upper arm and his tight body is pressing me to the wall, on the left door that leads out of the suite. A loud thud echoes through the room from the force and his hands come up on either side of my shoulders, locking me in.

The feeling I get at the sudden contact makes my knees go weak and the only thing holding me up is the force of his body up against mine. Warmth curdles in my stomach and my eyes move from his down to his pink, perfectly curved lips that are slanted impossibly close to mine.

“We’re fine.” Ryder growls snapping me out of the trance I have on his lips.

Reynolds and Charlie are at the other door. Except it isn’t really them it’s a pale blonde wolf that’s leaner than the short more built brown one. Their black eyes are looking over me carefully and Ryder growls loudly again at them. They walk back out of the room slowly, their paws whispering against the wood floor.

My head falls back on the door with a moan when Ryder’s hips grind against mine, my hands grabbing at his shirt to keep the warmth of him close to me. When he pushes himself against me even more his face comes up to hover over the top of mine, using his height to his advantage.

“You honestly have no idea what you do to me.” he says giving me no time to respond before his lips press forcefully against mine, the only thing holding up my weak body is his strong arm that has moved to wrap around my waist.