The king's eyes

It’s like with the wolf. I have to let him yell at me a bit, show me his authority, expose his defensive abilities, etc.

He needs it, I can understand that.

And therefore, I will act as the wolf. Show him in return that I’m there, that I just want to help him. And I’m not leaving until I get rid of that damn curse.

This creature represents what he is deep down inside, and strangely I am more familiar with it than with Samael himself.

It’s as if you know the insides of something without knowing the surface.

It’s time for him to know that I know him more than he thinks. That I know him better than anyone, see, than himself.

I haven’t yet dared to speak to him about his children. Yet I really want to ask him where they are, and when will they come home. They too have demon blood... But tiny... Does it manifest itself? Either way, I’m worried about them. And I want to know if they’re okay.

Tonight I will not seek to fathom the dreams of Samael. I will give free rein to our subconscious. The wolf knows where to find me to feel less alone.

The next day I feel serene and positive.

The wolf is very often present in my mind and in my dreams. It must do him good to finally have access to someone. He still doesn’t want me to touch him. But he follows me, he listens to me talk, and he sits next to me when I’m too sound asleep.

Today is my real day, the day I enter the court. Bérénice came to find me to invite me to the official presentation at the end of the day, then to dinner. So I have the day off to stroll through the gardens or the forest.

I continue to pick up the faded flowers to recover their essences, with the petals. I would like to awaken Samael’s sense of smell tonight. There is a big rose garden, I think his mother liked it.

In the evening, I got ready for the first day, with a darker outfit and I tied my hair. Bérénice accompanies me again to the throne room.

Samael is pensive, but less annoyed, and more relaxed too. His aura has changed. We have nevertheless made a little progress, even if it is not to him that we owe it but to this dear wolf.

Court people are disagreeable, suspicious, and haughty. A few people came to chat with me after my official presentation to ask me how I intended to stand out from the others who have so far failed miserably.

It’s time for dinner and I already want to go back to my room. Berenice accompanies me to a table at the very back of the throne room. But Samael intervenes

“Bérénice, please place Lady Iris next to me.” He asked.

“As you wish, your grace.” She said

What a good surprise, he is no longer angry with me, so much better, it would have been less difficult in the future.

I am following Bérénice who sits me down on Samael’s right. He immediately tell me:

“Don’t get me wrong Iris. I put you here to keep an eye on you, no pun intended.”

I couldn’t help laughing, but he didn’t laugh at all.

I tell him anyway “Oh come on, it was good, right? Rho... I am good public. Relax my king. I do not intend to harm anyone. I know that you place me near you to study me. I have no problem with that.

And it will always be more pleasant than being spied on in all directions by your court of gruff old people.”

This time he burst out laughing. So I laugh with him. Everyone looks at us, and we clear our throats and start eating.

“So, can I have an idea of ​​the program you have prepared for me tonight?” He asked.

“Well, it depends on what you’re willing to do.” I said, mischievously.

"Try me." He said.

What a challenger! Finally. "Oh yes? What if I ask you to come into the gardens, unescorted, and without shoes?”

He told me to try, isn’t he?

He refrains from spitting the contents of his mouth upon hearing my proposal.

“Are you serious?" He asked.

"Yes, I am. It’s not that bad... And then I don’t have a lot of time, so the experiments have to be... intensive.” I explained.

He does not answer me. But I have trust. He will come.

After dinner, I return to my room to prepare for the night session. I made rose essence out of the petals, put a few drops in a bowl of water, and soaked my hair in it. When the wind carries them, the smell will float.

Going to the gardens at night is strange, but I have to guide him to his demon part, which is stronger at night.

I go out to go to the rose garden.

Something tells me that it will evoke something for him, roses are more present in the gardens than any other flowers, I will try to ask him a little more about his mother, and maybe he will talk to me about his father and their relationship.

Samael arrives. He is indeed barefoot, he wears flowing pants and a matching shirt.

“You lent yourself to the exercise Monsignor, I salute your goodwill." I said.

"Well, well... Come on, let’s start, the guards are stressed and on the alert. The sooner we’re done, the sooner everyone can relax.” He feels the surrounding stress. Interesting.

I begin:

“Your Majesty. Where are we?"

"In the gardens..." He answered.

"More precisely?” I asked.

"The rose garden." He already starts to be annoyed...

This man...

"Yes... Roses are very present here. I’m going to ask you to focus on their scent, and tell me about the reason for their existence, your mother liked them?" I tried.

"No... not her” He answered, thoughtful.

He inhales by closing his eyes to smell the fragrance that surrounds him. “Lilith. She was the one who loved roses. I had the roses planted for her.”

Damn... I would have liked to start with a pleasant memory...

I try anyway... “Would you mind talking to me about the queen, My Lord?"

"... Lilith was pretty and sweet. Everyone loved her. It was easy too. She smiled a lot, but... Her smile sometimes hid something, she wasn’t sure of herself, she doubted, and she was sometimes troubled.

There is a part of her that bothered me after a few times. I had a feeling that warned me. I struggled with this for years.

I tried to convince myself that she was just a good person who questions herself, and is still looking for herself. She was brought to this role of the queen by her upbringing.

She had to figure out how to assert herself.

But something yelled to me that it was dangerous, uncertain.

Then when the rebellion grew stronger, she began to gradually distance herself. And I felt her change.

I was losing her..." He confessed...

"How did you know, my king?” I asked a little bit moved.

“I knew it, that’s all... I can’t explain it." He answered, suspicious.

I need to dig.

"Search in your memory. You knew, a part of you knew. Because it was able to perceive it. Who, in you, could perceive it?” I insisted. I have to.

“Who in me...? I don’t understand what you mean..” He said, lost. I have to help him.

"...The wolf, Samael. The wolf knew. Is not it?"

"The wolf... How do you know about the wolf, Iris? It’s something that’s deep inside me, my imagination. I never told anyone about it..." He said, uncomfortable.

I decide to confess. "Because I know the wolf, and the wolf knows me. It’s thanks to him that you know who I am. That you know I’m not dangerous.

You may not be able to see, but you can observe in another way, and decipher each one of us. Because the wolf can...

Who is the wolf, Samael?”

He is crossed by many feelings... He is shocked and feels trapped...

But he is also curious, he knows that the truth is at hand... That he must pursue. “...It’s been in me forever...It used to scare me when I was little...Actually, at first, it was kind of a dark stain, it scared me but made me stronger.

More later I found that it had an animal form, so I associated it with a wolf, I called it that.

Over time it really became a wolf. I don’t know if I influenced that or if I discovered it."

"It took the form you gave him. Did anyone other than you know of its existence?” I tried.

“My father. I never mentioned the wolf to anyone. I was to be the future king... I couldn’t admit this dark side in me... People would have doubted me.

But he knew.

He always looked at me like a parasite. He barely spoke to me when I was a kid.

When I got older, he saw me as a rival, and he became violent with me, like he had been violent with my mother in the past.

It’s as if he contained himself most of the time, he held himself back from living...

Then he broke down, and if my mother tried to help him, she was beaten.

But later, it was against me that he had it.

One day he went too far. He was unleashed on my face... my cheek burst. He stopped before killing me...

The next day he was found dead in his bedroom.

I never knew if he had taken his own life. Or if it was some sort of illness that was eating him away and that finally took him away...

But we were all relieved in the end.

I’m still quite upset by this story... I haven’t managed to draw a line under all that...” He said, with restrained emotion.

I have tears in my eyes about what he just confessed... but I try above all not to let him notice it, he must stay focused on himself.

I have to guide him. “Samael... Your father... had a wolf, too. And you know it deep down..."

"... Another kind of wolf... An even darker stain... Unpredictable... Unfathomable... Indomitable... like a mental disease... What is it, Iris? Please..." He asked me, shakily.

I so want to cry to see him almost begging... He has to find it by himself.

Go futher my dear one... I will help you...

“Samael... Read in me, look at me, look at yourself, through me...

We are no longer in the rose garden, we are in the forest, in the middle of the night...

We seek the wolf together, I call him for you... The wolf is part of you, he is you Samael, you are one and the same unit.

You are not completely human... Part of you is magical. And it’s beautiful, it’s healthy, it’s even, grandiose...”

I can’t help but cry. He is really moved too, and I have to continue... So he will let it go.

“You are an exceptional being Samael, accept this part of you that completes you, the wolf is your mirror...”

Samael falls to his knees... He takes his head in his hands, then he touches both sides of the top of his head... He moans in grief and shock at this revelation...

I kneel with him, I sob, the scene is too intense... I am overwhelmed by Samael’s distress...

I have to tell him that it’s okay, it’s not so bad, it’s just who he is.

“Yes... He is not a wolf... He is you... You have to accept him, because his place is not in a buried part of you...

What are you, Samael?.. Say it... Tell me what a magnificent creature you are?"

I feel him, amazed... I finally say: "A demon...”