: Chapter 9
I turned to my mom with wide, panicked eyes.
“I have to live here when you’re gone and see the aftermath of your visit. Don’t do anything I’m going to regret.”
Her black gaze focused on me then cleared. She gave me a tender smile and smoothed a hand over my hair.
“I’ve forgotten how intense you can be. I promise not to do anything more to haunt you, Eliana. I’ve already done enough that you regret.”
I hugged her because I had to. My mom hated what she’d done to my dad because it had hurt me. However, she didn’t truly see anything wrong with it. Why should she, after all? She’d only been doing what was natural to her. What she needed to do to survive.
“Let’s just have a nice dinner, okay?” she said, pulling back. “There’s so much catching up we need to do now that I’m here.”
She led me to a table, and I did my best not to look in Fenris’s direction.
Mom’s face was hilarious as she plucked a menu from between the condiment containers in the center of the table.
“Well, this is quaint. And sticky.” She set the menu before her and glanced at the offerings.
As done up as she was, she should have looked out of place. But she didn’t. She just looked beautiful and commanding. I could tell from our neighbors that they appreciated the effort she had put into her appearance, too. The man was staring at Mom’s cleavage while his wife raptly gazed at Mom’s face.
“Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea,” I said.
“Nonsense. Sticky hands are something I grew used to long ago. It’s a side effect of having a really good time.” She gave me a quick smile. “Did you find something you like?”
I shook my head and stared at the menu while trying to scrub the mental image she’d just painted from my mind.
“I think I’ll try their steak,” she said. “It looks like it’s the popular item around here.”
I glanced at the other restaurant-goers and noticed most of them were eating either a burger or a steak. Neither appealed to me. In fact, just the thought of real food made my stomach twist. I could definitely blame that on Fenris’s mouthwatering scent permeating the air in the room. Of course, I’d rather have that.
“I’ll do the same,” I said.
Mom set her menu back in its place and looked around.
“Service here is a little different than I’m used to. Do we wait at the table or order at the bar?”
“Wait at the table,” I said.
“How was school today? Learn anything interesting?”
I relaxed into the typical, light Mom conversation we usually shared over the phone. It was weird talking in person, but nice. When the waitress appeared to take our order, Mom spoke for both of us.
“And two glasses of your best red, please,” Mom said.
Once the waitress left, Mom leaned in.
“Now that we’ve ordered, let’s get to the good stuff. I’m dying to know what you’ve experienced so far and what you’re curious about. Now that I’m here, I can help.”
I frowned, confused.
“Experienced?”
“Yes. Sexually. I’m sure you’re well past oral and regular intercourse. Have you progressed to toys yet? I found these cute tails online that are actually anal plugs. They’re adorable and feel great to wear, especially with heels. You’ll drive the men here crazy if you decided to sport a tail.”
My mouth dropped open, and a flush started just over my hammering pulse and spread upward to my face.
“You’re probably past that already too, aren’t you? Just like me at your age. I bloomed fast and hard.” A wistful smile crossed her face. “All the boys in a ten-mile radius had difficulty walking for most of that summer. Oh, the things we did. Have you had group sex already?”
“Mom, please,” I managed in a strangled whisper, wishing the earth would open up and hell would swallow me whole. Because it sure felt like I belonged there. My hunger was giddy with all the suggestions she was giving it. And a good part of me was curious, too. However, most of me just felt mortified that she was talking about this in a normal, conversational tone.
“Not here,” I said.
She glanced around the restaurant in confusion until her gaze landed on Fenris.
“Is it because there’s someone from your school here?” she asked me, finally lowering her voice. “I can assure you Raiden’s boy won’t care. Wolves have as voracious an appetite for sex as we do. Too bad it’s only for their mates.”
She gave me a considering look that slowly turned to worry.
“You’re embarrassed,” she said in sudden shock. “You’re not a virgin, are you?”
Her last words had been delivered in a louder than normal tone of abject horror that only a succubus mother could manage when talking about virginity.
The gentle clanking of silverware stopped, and another wave of mortification tickled its way up my spine. Without a doubt, she’d gained the attention of every single person in the restaurant. I didn’t turn to look, though, as my face continued to heat.
Mom continued to watch me expectantly, her worry growing. While I knew she loved me unconditionally, her affection didn’t make her inability to understand why I hadn’t been with anyone yet any easier.
It was crazy to think I’d successfully kept it from her this long. Well, not just me. Adira and the Quills knew, too. But, they hadn’t said anything either because the Council hadn’t wanted a succubus as powerful as my mom running amok in Uttira. Adira’s silence had enabled me to lead Mom to the belief that I was just a picky eater. A stubborn teen rebelling. None of that bothered my mom. However, a virgin succubus my age was unheard of. She’d never leave now, even if her name was cleared with the Council.
I reached into my purse and set my keys on the table.
“I’ll see you at home.”
Mom didn’t try to stop me as I got up and walked out. Although she might not understand why I was upset, she always knew when I needed my space and gave it to me. Just like she had four years ago when I asked to live with the Quills and figure out this succubus thing on my own. I wasn’t quite the same girl I’d been back then. I was smarter about the world to which I’d been born. However, I was still just as lost.
The cold winter air licked at my exposed arms, a reminder that I still hadn’t gotten my coat back from Adira. How had everything gone so wrong so quickly? As much as I would like to say my problems began when Megan left, they’d been building long before that. Each time I’d refused Adira’s prodding to become more “normal” for a succubus, I’d dug myself a deeper hole. And now, there would be no escaping my fate because Mom knew my big secret.
I hated the pressure that everyone put on me. It wasn’t just the adults, either. It was also my peers. Why wasn’t I kissing anyone at the Academy? Or dating? Obviously, something had to be wrong with me, according to them. Nothing felt wrong, though, except the way I was constantly judged and found lacking. Why couldn’t they all just let me be me?
Lost in my own head, I walked along the road home. At least, I thought I did.
When the scent of something mouthwatering finally teased my attention from my thoughts, I looked up and found myself in the middle of a quiet neighborhood. I knew I should turn around and leave the tempting smell, but I couldn’t.
As if pulled by an invisible thread, I moved closer to the stone house with blue shutters. It looked and smelled so inviting. The smoke that curled from the chimney only added to the flavor already in the air.
I inhaled deeply, my hunger already demanding its due, and stepped closer to the home’s darkened window. The light from the backyard glinted silver off my black eyes as I approached. In the glass’s reflection, I watched myself open my mouth. A thick thread of energy drifted out the partially opened window, filling my mouth and sliding down my throat.
It filled me, warming me and strengthening me in a way that feeding from Mrs. Quill never had. I swallowed and pulled more, too hungry and upset to think of all the reasons I shouldn’t. The joy of having a real meal consumed me as thoroughly as I devoured the energy. I never wanted to stop. I never wanted to feel hungry again. I would feed until I burst then—
The energy abruptly ended.
Snapped out of my feeding, I stared at my reflection in horror for a moment before running away from the window. I didn’t even know who I’d just fed on. A man? A woman? Someone barely into puberty?
I ran until I had a stitch in my side then slowed to a walk, blocks away from the home.
Angry at myself and everyone who’d pushed me, I kicked at a chunk of snow sitting on the side of the road. It exploded on contact and splattered my jean-clad leg with slush. I snorted in disgust and maintained my anger for another block before my shoulders slumped in defeat.
As much as I wanted to blame Adira, Mom, and Mrs. Quill for what happened, it wasn’t their fault. It was mine. If I didn’t want to accidentally make love-slaves out of my neighbors, I needed better control. It didn’t matter that I had slipped because I was emotionally distracted over things not going my way.
Sure, my mom would make my life hard now that she knew how behind I was, but so what? Ninety percent of girls my age had the same problem. Well, not with being a succubus but with a parent being on their case for something.
I could either become a whiney puddle of life’s-not-fair, or I could pull up my big girl pants and figure out how to give myself a life without so much adult interference. Especially from my mom.
Frowning, I thought of Megan and her assurance that she and Oanen were doing what they could to clear Mom’s name. I knew Megan was trying, but how long would it take? Whoever was doing these killings was smart because the creatures they were murdering weren’t simple to kill. A smart person wouldn’t be easy to find, not even for a fury. But, time wasn’t something I had. I knew what would start happening now that Mom knew my secret, and I couldn’t afford to wait weeks for Mom’s name to be cleared. I needed her out of Uttira fast.
I needed to talk to the goblin.
It was a long walk out of town, but I wasn’t overly cold, thanks to my recent feeding. When I got close to Megan’s house, everything was dark. While I knew of goblins in general, I’d never dealt with one in person. They were reclusive by nature. So, I wasn’t sure if a dark house was a good thing or not.
Going around to the back door, I knocked then let myself in with the key.
“Hello,” I called. “My name is Eliana. I’m Megan’s friend. The one who offered to feed you.”
“Elbner knows who you are,” a low voice said from the dark.
Red eyes glinted in the hall. A tingle of fear traced down my spine. It didn’t matter that the height of those eyes was waist level. In fact, that only made them creepier. I reached out for the switch and flooded the kitchen with light.
The goblin stood where the eyes had been. In one hand, he held a filthy rag. In the other, a small hand broom. Dirt smudged his threadbare clothes and his pointed chin. As I stared, the permanent scowl on the goblin’s wizened face deepened.
“It’s nice to meet you, Elbner,” I said politely, looking around the now immaculate kitchen.
Megan had kept the place neat enough, but the old home had sported signs of age in the yellowing of its walls and cabinets. That yellow was gone. Everything looked fresh and clean. Even the slight stain by the refrigerator handle was gone.
“This is impressive,” I said. “Have you slept at all since you got here?”
“Are you here to feed me or talk my ears off?”
“I’m sorry. You’re the first goblin I’ve met, and I don’t know the etiquette.”
“You feed me, and I work. That’s the etiquette.”
“Okay. Did you like what I fed you last time? Is there anything that I should change?”
He gave me a contemplative look.
“It was okay. But for the quality of my work, brownie wings would be a suitable gift of appreciation. Dip them in boiled honey and crumble them on top for a bit of crunch. That’s how me mum’s old owner used to feed her. She ate like royalty and polished his throne nightly in return.” His scowl melted into anticipation.
I had to swallow back my bile before answering him.
“Megan is a fury who finds the consumption of brownie wings wicked. For your safety and mine, you must forego the wings.”
He grunted, his intelligent eyes never leaving my face.
“You’re a clever one, aren’t you?” he asked.
“No more clever than you, I imagine.” I went to the cupboard and got out a bowl, noting that it was the one I’d used previously and that he’d already washed and put it away.
“Can you tell me anything about your previous owner? Did he feed you wings?”
The goblin snorted.
“Wings are hard to come by.”
“Do you remember your previous owner’s name?”
I looked up from the oats I was pouring when Elbner made a choked sound. He was trying to speak, but no words were coming out.
“It’s okay,” I said, doing my best to hide my disappointment. “I know about the spell. It was wishful thinking that you’d be free of it in only a few days. We’ll try again tomorrow.”
I finished adding the milk and honey and put everything away.
“Is there anything else you need from me?” I asked.
“Your absence. Turn off the light on your way out.”
As I left, I heard the chair at the table move across the floor. How could he possibly survive on one bowl of honey and oats a day? Yet, I’d read that’s all they required. I wondered if he was in a constant state of starvation like I normally was.
Inhaling the cold air deeply, I realized the hunger that always crawled just below my skin wasn’t so noticeable now. Just how much had I really eaten? And what would happen to that person?
Typically, when a succubus fed, it was in the open. The person knew who was feeding on them. But because the person never saw me, I was unsure what would happen if I ran into the person tomorrow. Would they still feel an instant need to be near me? To please me in any way possible? I hoped not because the result of such a deep feeding would be more intense than what had happened with Eugene.
By the time I reached the Quills’, my face was cold, I’d lost feeling in my toes, and I wanted nothing more than a long, hot shower where I’d do my best to forget the day I had. However, after ditching Mom at the restaurant, I doubted I’d get any of that.
Instead of going in through the front door, I checked the garage and found my car there then snuck around to the back of the house. This time, I was more careful wedging my way through the bushes and didn’t hesitate in the dark. The last thing I wanted to do was face Fenris right now, fed or not. Thankfully, I reached the door without interruption and slid inside the house undetected.
The faint strings of music reached my ears, and I frowned. Music wasn’t unusual in the human world. But in Uttira, where creatures tended to have sensitive ears, most didn’t play it. In fact, I was the odd one in the Quills’ house. That music was playing now meant Mom was still up.
Walking quietly, I made my way upstairs. The sound of music grew louder as I turned down my hall. So did the sound of laughter from at least three different people. I started breathing through my mouth, already dreading what I was likely to find as I approached the entertainment room.
I didn’t make it that far.
“Downward dog time,” Mom called out behind Oanen’s closed door.
I cringed on Oanen’s behalf and hurried to my room. He would need to have his room professionally cleaned before he used it again. Even breathing through my mouth, I could taste the lust in the air.
That lust turned to skunk the moment I stepped into my room.
I stared at my bed in wide-eyed horror. Amongst brightly wrapped packages resting on my quilt, Piepen rode an overly large dildo like a mechanical bull. The loud buzzing and the continuous clacking of his tiny teeth did nothing to muffle his wild laughter as he swung one small arm above his head.
“I w-w-wish my mom-m-m w-w-would have giv-v-ven me stuff like this-s-s.”
Had I still been starving, he would have been dead. Thankfully, I wasn’t hungry enough to consume what was floating in the air. Choking on his awful lust, I crossed the room and yanked his toy out from under him. He squealed his disappointment when I turned it off.
“You could have hurt yourself. This wasn’t for you,” I said, dropping it back into the box he’d opened.
Guilt stole his indignation as he stood.
“I’m sorry. I’ve never seen presents before and wanted to know what was in them.”
“Never?”
He shook his head sadly.
“My parents were eaten when I was only a week old. Gram and Grand took care of me, but they were wingless and had no jobs.”
Just when I was about to feel bad for him, he grabbed himself.
“Why do my nuts feel cold?”
I rolled my eyes.
“Probably because you vibrated all the blood from them.”
He began massaging himself, which only made his lust stronger.
“It’s for medicinal purposes,” he said quickly when I opened my mouth to tell him to stop.
Instead of arguing, I retreated to the bathroom with my pajamas and did my best not to reflect on my crappy day. Tomorrow would be better. It had to be.
Relaxed from a nice hot shower and wearing my comfy button-up pajama top with matching flannel pants, I left the bathroom and found Mom sitting on the edge of my bed.
I looked around the room for Piepen and found him safely peeking over the edge of his drawer.
“Don’t worry,” Mom said. “He’s perfectly safe from me. I don’t know how you can even breathe in here.”
I shrugged.
“He can’t help it.”
She smiled.
“You have a good heart, Eliana. It’s one of the many things I love about you. And I want you to know that my love for you will never change. Neither will my promise this morning.”
I struggled to remember what she’d said. So much had happened since breakfast.
“I’m here to support you in any way I can. Which is why I asked Mrs. Quill to help me with a little quick shopping while she was out picking up some people to feed me. I would have waited for you so I could watch you open them, but I was famished. I see you liked the pink one?”
“What? No. Piepen got into the package before I got here.”
She cast a dirty look his direction.
“I told you they were gifts for Eliana. The next time I leave something for her, you will not touch it. Am I understood?”
He squealed and dove under his pillow.
“He understands,” I said, answering for him.
“Good.”
She stood and opened her arms for a hug, which parted her gossamer robe.
“Mom? What are you wearing?”
She looked down at her white, lacey, see-through contraption in confusion.
“It’s a teddy, Eliana.” Her gaze flicked to my closet. Before I could stop her, she went to the door and pulled it open.
Her sounds of disapproval made me want to crawl under my covers and never come out.
“This is completely unacceptable. When you said your dresses were gone, I thought it was just the knee-length ones. None of this is you.” She turned toward me. “Don’t worry about a thing, baby. Now that I’ve had a little nourishment to take the edge off, I’ll be able to speak to Adira with a calm mind. Your wardrobe will be fixed in no time.”
She turned to me and kissed my cheek. As she did, her stomach growled.
“Maybe I need to eat a bit more before I face Adira. Would you like to join me?”
“Actually, I’m really tired.”
“Okay. Why don’t you open the rest of your gifts? Then you can go to bed.”
I nodded and robotically went to my bed. My mother loved me. Too much. And she wanted me to be just like her based on the number of “toys” she’d bought me. I didn’t know what half of them were, but thanked her for each one and promised to come to her with any questions. Especially about the one that had all the black straps and the weird attachment.
She waited until I put everything away in the unused drawers below Piepen’s bed then tucked me in.
“I’ve missed you so much, Eliana. I want to spend as much time with you as you’ll allow. Say the word, and I’m there for you. For anything. Any time. Anywhere.”
She smoothed a hand over my cheek and smiled down at me.
“I understand why you’ve kept things from me…why you’re probably still keeping things from me. I’m not angry. I’m not like the Council. We’ll find you what you like to eat, and we’ll do it your way. Even if I need to hold Anwen down for you.”