The Heart of the Ocean

“The broken are the more evolved.”

Emotions are a reflection of the ocean. They are hidden so well and carefully in the depths of our hearts until they cannot be controlled anymore. Then, they begin to rise slowly with every challenge we face. Αt first, they rise quietly with only a few obvious bubbles around and then, more and more intensely. Eventually, they reach the surface of our minds, where they are now unstoppable as they overwhelm our thoughts and push us to actions. And then, they really are a force to be reckoned with -a mighty ocean that cannot be controlled.

Emotions become powerful waves that now refuse to hide and cause storms both in our souls and in those around us. The only way they can be stopped is to reveal the truth -to let the waves reach the shore and burst with force upon its surface. And that always ends up being our most honest truth -beautiful, dangerous, and wild.

Aide could feel her emotions rising to the surface. She had tried to keep them under control for so long, but now...now she just couldn’t. A month had passed by and yet, Nana’s conversation with Aileen was still ringing like a bell in her ears. Truth be told, she had changed after the incident –she wasn’t the same girl anymore. She had grown quiet and more observant. She was taking in every little detail she’d otherwise miss, trying to put the pieces of the puzzle in place.

At first, she didn’t know how to feel. Aileen was hiding the truth from her, deciding that it was best to talk to Alexandra rather than her. Nana was giving away the answers Aide had been constantly begging her for to another person. Petra was secretly visiting Alastor Steel, even though she knew what he’d done to her friends. It was too much. She needed time to think and emotions just made it difficult to do so. So, she just kept everything inside, bottling them quietly as if she wasn’t hurt.

But how long could an ocean last in a bottle before it shattered into pieces?

The sound of rain was soothing as she buried herself under her comfortable blanket. The cold droplets fell endlessly against her window before sliding down the fogy glass. Aide sighed deeply as she stared uninterested at her bedroom’s wall. After many days of thinking, observing, and most importantly, ignoring Nana’s questions, she’d finally reached a conclusion.

She wasn’t angry at Aileen. As a matter of fact, she was happy for her. The red-haired didn’t have the easiest life –honestly, Aide hated that her friend had faced so many difficulties at such a young age. It was nice to see her emerald eyes shining with excitement and her face flushing in shyness. She was glad that she found someone that made her happy. Aileen deserved the world –she deserved to have someone that truly loved her and made her smile.

However, Aide was also hurt. Why didn’t her friend talk to her? Perhaps, she thought that she wouldn’t believe her. Any logical person wouldn’t believe mermaids are real! But Aide had talked to her about almost drowning when she was little. She could still remember how much they laughed when the topic of a certain merman was brought up right afterward. Perhaps, it wasn’t her fault. Maybe Aileen just felt more comfortable with Nana because she always saw her as a mother figure. It still hurt though –Aide felt like she had somehow lost her trust. It was such a strange feeling.

Then, there was Nana Alexandra. Aide decided that she was angry and disappointed with her. She didn’t mind that she had helped her friend –actually, she was glad that at least, Aileen had someone having her back. What she couldn’t understand was why she’d help Aileen and not her? Why would she try to keep her in the dark for so many years, when she knew she desperately needed her answers? It just didn’t make any sense. For a period of time, she’d actually believed that the merman she saw was not real. She thought she was going crazy. And she just didn’t understand why so much secrecy was necessary!

After that, her mind wandered to Evander. Her heart instantly skipped a painful beat. She had thought long and hard, spending countless nights falling asleep with memories of him playing in her mind. She realized she was truly mesmerized by him. She felt an unimaginable pull towards him even after all these years. She had feelings for him –emotions she tried desperately to hide. The image of them being together brought an instant smile to her lips, only for it to fall right after.

She was so damn scared of him. She had seen him covered in blood, attacking one of his own and ripping his neck out! She acted as any logical person would do –she run for the hills! He wasn’t the loving man she had grown to know at that moment –he was a beast with a familiar face. Her fear overpowered her longing. Aide wanted to cry. She wanted to run to the beach and hug him. She wanted to apologize for not meeting him again –for letting so much time pass by. She wanted to kiss him until she was breathless.

And yet, she also wanted to never see him again. She wanted to stay on land, where she was safe. She wanted to stay as far away as humanly possible. There was an inner battle inside her –one she had fought for too many years. She was just so exhausted. She wanted to have nothing to do with him. She wanted to be with him. Oh, damn! She didn’t know!

Her mind switched to something else like a protective mechanism. Petra! Now now, as far as P was concerned, Aide was furious. She had followed her a couple of times, only to realize that Petra’s visits to the Steel’s were a regular occasion. For fuck’s sake, where was that girl’s mind !? She knew what Alastor had done to both her friends and she was...turned on? Why would she want to be with a person like that? Well, obviously she was a free woman –she could do whatever she wanted. However, something didn’t make sense. Aide didn’t know what to make out of it. She had asked Petra multiple times, only for her to lie to her and pretend everything was alright. It just made her angrier and angrier!

Little did she know that everything would fall in place that same evening. Aide was still wrapped in her blanket when she opened the front door. Nana looked at her strangely but didn’t comment. The elder knew she was angry with her –she could feel it. A familiar blonde smiled at her before entering the house. Aide closed the door with force, making Petra jump. She wasn’t sorry enough to apologize.

“Someone is in a bad mood”, P joked before greeting Nana.

Aide let a humorless laugh escape her lips.

“You’d be too if I constantly lied in your face”, she stated firmly.

“What do you mean?“, Petra furrowed her eyebrows, “Why are you acting like this?”

“What are you doing with Alastor, P?“, Aide was sick and tired of her behavior, ” You know everything he has done and yet, you decided to be with him.”

“How do you know?“, Petra asked in a small voice, shocked by the revelation.

Aide raised a dark eyebrow.

“Does it matter?”

Petra huffed in annoyance. Her thoughts were running wild. She was a free woman! She could be with whoever she wanted! Who did Aide think she was? She couldn’t tell her what to do!

“You’ve always had a problem with me”, Petra said angrily, “You’d never dare to talk to Aileen in that way!”

“Girls”, Alexandra stepped between them, “Please, try to calm do-”

“Aileen isn’t stupid enough to be with a guy like that!“, Aide yelled back to her, “I mean, come on P! I’m worried for you! He is not a good man!”

Petra clenched her fists as angry tears started to form in her eyes. Aide wasn’t her mother! She’d do whatever she wanted to do! She had no right to criticize her and judge her this way! She didn’t care that she was trying to watch out for her. She had no right to intervene in her business.

“Of course! Aileen is so perfect and so intelligent! She’d never do stupid things like me, will she? I’ll never be on her level, because I’m just...worthless, right?“, P yelled in fury, “Who does she think she is?”

Aide was shocked, but Nana seemed to have had enough.

“Your tantrum is meaningless, you understand this, yes?“, Alexandra stated calmly at the pacing girl.

“It’s not fair!“, she yelled at the old lady with all her might making Nana widen her eyes at her audacity, “It’s just not fair!”

Loud sobs escaped her throat along with her curses, making her appear as a complete mess. Aide was too shocked to see Petra in such a crazed state to tell her anything. What happened to her best friend? How could she speak so ill about their closest friend? About the person that got her back through all these years? About a girl who just wanted a normal life, but instead got one full of pain and tragedy?

How could she let so many years of friendship go to waste for the sake of a man?

“Why!? Why must she be always the one?“, she sobbed desperately in her hands, “People love her so...so effortlessly! Why must she have it all -the looks, the intelligence, the character!?”

“Why is she so...perfect?“, she laughed humorlessly through her tears, “Poor, orphan Aileen is such a sweet and kind soul, right? Such a sweetheart -everyone wants to be her! She never makes mistakes! She is just a pure soul that luck didn’t do her justice. I am so sick of it!”

She found Aide’s widened eyes through the river of her tears.

“I’m done! I won’t tolerate this any longer!“, she furrowed her eyebrows in concentration, “I’m better! She doesn’t even care about what’s happening around her -she doesn’t as much as spare a second glance to the people around her! I’ve tried so hard to be good -to earn the respect of others, to make them notice me, and accept me! And yet, they will never give me half the love they offer to her!”

“Just because they love her, it doesn’t mean they don’t love you, stupid girl”, Nana shook her head in annoyance, “Just because she is good at something, it doesn’t mean you aren’t good in something else. You two are entirely different people -you can’t compare distinct things.”

“Says the one who makes distinctions!“, Petra snorted, “You always treated us differently! You acted as if she was a doll made of glass, while you glared and insulted me! What do you have to say about that, huh?”

Nana raised an eyebrow as she started to fume in anger.

“Maybe if you focused on yourself and not on what others do, my behavior would be different”, the old lady said.

“No, it wouldn’t!“, Petra shouted at her, “You’d still treat her differently! Honestly, the whole orphan drama has to end at some point! Aren’t you pleased with all the pity she got? Does she really needs so much attention?”

Nana saw it coming before it happened, but she didn’t make it on time. Her hand didn’t reach Aide’s on time, giving her the chance to approach the maddening girl that was screaming kneeled in the middle of their living room.

A loud noise echoed through the room, quieting the uncontrollable sobs and furious screams of the paranoid girl. A red mark started to slowly appear on Petra’s right cheek as a burst of pain exploded from where Aide had slapped her. Shocked at her actions, Petra remained completely shocked looking at her with widened eyes.

“How dare you?“, the dark-haired whispered yelled with such hate that made Petra shiver, “How dare you betray your friend like that?”

Her voice was just louder than a whisper, but the poison in it would make anyone silent. Aide couldn’t help her feelings at her friend’s actions. They both knew Aileen didn’t have an easy life growing up with both her parents’ absence.

“Get out.”

Petra’s eyes widened.

“I-”

“Get the hell out of my house!”

She immediately stood up at Aide’s scream, still holding on to her throbbing cheek.

“Where am I supposed to go?“, she asked tremblingly.

Aide snorted.

“I don’t care”, she shrugged her shoulders, “Perhaps, to that whore of a man? The one you put above our friendship? God, I can’t believe you chose him out of everyone else, knowing everything he has done!“, she shook her head completely disappointed.

Petra let a tear escape her.

“Aide, I-”

“I don’t want to hear anything else! Get out of my house! I am sure he is looking for a girl to spend the night. You could do the honors”, she said coldly, before quickly turning around and leaving the room without a second glance.

The front door closed no long after.

As did the door of their friendship.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

End of chapter 21!!

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