The Gift

Brittany walks in and sits on the chair and says, “I thought you said he was blind?”

“He is,” I reply.

“He seemed to find your lips okay. Not to mention my hair.”

“The sound of my voice,” I say as way of explanation. “And I told him about your hair.”

She seems to accept that. “So girly, is he a good kisser? And those blue eyes, wow.”

Here we go again. “That was only number two and not three, so I’m not sure if I’m qualified to judge.”

She groans. “You just don’t want to tell me.”

“No,” I sigh. “Fine, in my VERY limited experience, yes, he’s a good kisser. Satisfied?”

“I guess so. You’re so lucky. And he’s got such pretty blue eyes, why does he hide them?”

“I think it’s a blind thing, but I really haven’t asked,” I tell her. Trying to change the subject from Ben I say, “Look what I can do.” I hop off the bed, grabbing the walker and travel around the room.

I stop and push the walker in front of me as far as I can reach and say, “Okay, time to win the bet.”

“Hey, no fair,” she says as I let go and take a step, then start to take another and grab the walker as I start to sink towards the floor. She jumps up and comes over to me.

I hope she doesn’t realize it was my right knee that seemed to give out, not my left. As I seemingly hang on, trying to get myself standing again, I say, “I guess you win.”

“Huh?”

Using my left hand, since my right is acting like it’s keeping me in place, I point at her.

She’s standing over me, but her crutches are still at the chair she was in. Brittany put her hands on my walker.

I stand and say, “Too late to act like you can’t, you just did.”

“But I didn’t think, you started to fall.”

“Then don’t think, just do.”

She looks at me suspiciously. “You did that on purpose,” she accuses me.

I just give her an innocent who me? Look. “I’m tired, let’s sit back down, shall we?”

She lets go of the walker and walks back to the chair unaided and sits.

I use the walker, dragging my left foot a little more than necessary. Teasing her, I sit in her lap instead of on the bed. I turn sideways to look at her and say, “You got knobby knees, girl.”

She rolls her eyes at me. “They are made of recycled milk cartons probably. I have an excuse though. You have a boney butt and no excuse.”

“I do. I’m in training to be a super model. I need to be a size six.”

“You plan on the plus size modeling?” she asks.

“No, no. I mean the size of a six-year-old.”

We both laugh and I put my arm around her neck.

“I’m not hurting you, am I?” I ask, not knowing how sensitive her legs still are.

She shakes her head no. “Tell me if I am.”

“Trust me, I will. You’ll probably know before I say it by my scream,” she says with a grin.

“Okay, you scream, and I’ll move,” I promise.

“Why did you help me?” she asks, changing the subject.

I shrug. “I saw you sitting alone, sad, and thought you could use a friend. I know I could.”

“So, I ended up with you,” she says then kisses my cheek. “I’m glad.”

“So am I,” I tell her. “So, what are you going to do when I leave?”

“I’ll keep in touch. We can text and talk. Visit when we can,” she says.

I look into her eyes getting serious. This is why I sat in her lap. So she couldn’t get up or avoid me. “You know I’m terminal.”

“There’s always a chance,” she says, eyes shifting from mine.

I put my hand on her cheek. “No Brit, no chance. I want you to promise me that when I do go, you’ll remember the good times and not be sad. Well, not too long, at least.

“You have your whole life ahead of you. Use it wisely.”

“I’ll make you proud.”

“Not me. Make yourself proud. You’ve already made me proud. Don’t let yourself down. I’m just a friend, remember? Find yourself a good kisser, marry him, have kids, get a good job, whatever makes you happy. Your life is about you, not me. Got it girly?” I say poking her in the chest. “No matter where you are, I’ll always be here.”

“You’re heavy,” she says.

“I’ll get up,” I say, and she grabs ahold of me.

“I didn’t mean your weight, waif, your advice. How’d you get so smart?”

I shrug again. She sighs and pulls me into her, and we hug.

“I’m not going to be happy when you leave me, but I’ll never forget you. Maybe I’ll change over to blue in tribute,” she says.

I sniff, an unseen tear rolling down my cheek into her top. It hurts me now, knowing it’s going to hurt her later, but I’m confident she’ll make it even is Lucas hadn’t told me.

We talk more, me still in her lap, each with an arm draped around the other. About boys, growing up, ambitions, fears, and life in general.

Brittany tells me all about herself, finding her cancer, her surgery, recovery, and depression up until the day I say down and talked to her.

I told her my story, minus Lucas, and Ben’s secrets.

Anna walked in and stopped. “Wow. I was expecting walking into a grope-fest, but I didn’t expect this.”

“Yeah, well, I’m young. I thought I was supposed to experiment before deciding?” I say and give Brittany a peck on the lips.

“Smart aleck,” Anna says.

“You started it, Mrs. Heidi. Did you know Anna got engaged last night?” I ask Brittany.

“No! Really?” she asks.

“Really,” Anna says, embarrassed.

“Congrats,” Brittany tells her.

I know Anna wasn’t really keeping it a secret, not wearing the ring, but I know Brittany would pester her enough to take bot their minds off of me.

Brittany looks at the clock and says, “Wow, is it really almost three? I didn’t think I’d been here that long. Get your fat butt off me. You’ve gone and put my legs asleep. Can’t feel a damn thing.”

I look at her for a second and she says, “Oh, wait. Can’t feel them because they’re gone. Never mind,” and we both start laughing.

Anna groans at the humor.

We hug again and Brittany says, “I should go. Let you rest some.”

I get up off of her and walk to the bed and sit.

Brittany just stares at me. “You lied. Or cheated. Something.”

Uh-oh. “I don’t know what you mean,” I say.

“Sneaky little trollip.” She stands up and gets her crutches, not bothering to use them. “I’m going to spread such vicious rumors that some random blind kid got to second base with you,” she says, sticking her tongue out at me. “And I’m still going to tell everyone I win the contest, leaving out the part where you let me win.” She winks at me.

“Lies, all lies.”

“I’m even going to say I know for a fact you kissed another girl.”

“You gonna tell them that girl was you?” I ask innocently.

“Hell no. And ruin my chances with some cute guy? Love,” she says, blowing me a kiss and walking out.

“Love you too,” I say to the empty door.

“Am I going to get an explanation for any of that?” Anna says, and I laugh.

I quickly hit the high spots knowing Holly would be here soon, not to mention Anna was probably busy.

She just shook her head. “So, you really did fake it so she would win?”

“Actually, I was going to fake not being able to win and that was it. I didn’t expect her to jump up to help. She did that on her own. That was I didn’t have to wait for her to walk to win. She beat me at my own game.” I giggle.

“You’re devious, you know that?”

“Yep, Mrs. Heidi.”

“You know, I think Jason’s going to be more upset at you knowing his last name than you telling everyone you talk to.”

I gawk at her. “Like anyone’s going to miss the ring on your finger. Or the glow. Be proud and flaunt it. If I was ten years older and not with Ben, I might have tried to steal him from you. And you told me it was some guy named Kris. For shame, lying to a dying girl.”

“It wasn’t a lie. Not exactly. He was before Jason, that’s all.”

“Well, not that it matters, but you’ll never know how happy I am for both of you.”

“To be honest, it matters a lot. To both of us. Jason actually suggested you to be our ring bearer.”

“I’d be honored. But just in case… maybe Holly or Brittany?”

She wipes at her cheek, ignoring my meaning, but not the tear.

“So… Can I have a sleepover tonight?” I ask.

“Brittany?”

“Ben,” I say innocently.

“Oh, absolutely not. What did Brittany call you? Oh yeah, trollip.”

I giggle and say, “Oh well, I tried.”

“What did she try?” asks Holly from the doorway.

“Little hussy want to have a sleepover with Ben. Wonder how much sleeping would actually happen,” Anna tells Holly.

“Hey, I’m thirteen, what do I know about the birds and the bees?”

“You’ve got Google. What you don’t know, which I suspect is less than I knew at eighteen, you can find out easy. In extreme detail, pictures included, I’m sure. So don’t play the Oh that goes there? game.”

“I refuse to admit I know anything of the sort.”

Anna looks at Holly and says, “She lies. I watched her kiss another girl just a few minutes ago. Caught her in the other girl’s lap.”

“Oh my God, you actually beat her to spreading the rumor. Fine. Anna’s engaged. To Jason,” I say, semi-satisfied.

Holly looks back and forth between us, not quite sure which statement to address first. “Information overload,” she finally says. “To Jason? Wow. Congratulations, lucky girl. And um, kissing another girl?”

“I’m in my teenage experimental phase,” I say with a grin.

Holly raises an eyebrow in question. “Actually, it was Brittany, and I did it to tease Anna and embarrass Brittany. And it was nothing more than a sisterly peck on the lips. It’s not like I stuck my tongue down her throat. At least not until Brittany thinks of it. Then I might have felt her up too since I was on her lap.” Holly’s eyes went wide. “But Anna was standing right here. I have a witness,” I claim.

“Who might just side with Brittany,” she says.

I shrug. “Then I guess I’m loose and it’s okay for Ben to spend the night?”

“NO!” Anna says.

“See, I tried,” I say to Holly, my eyes lit with humor.

Anna says, “I need to go. I’ll be back for dinner.”

“Just don’t complain if I’m in Holly’s lap and we’re making out. She’s more experienced than I am, so she can be the bad influence.”

Anna just smirks and Holly’s mouth drops open.