Chapter 61
I stare at my computer screen, unable to focus on anything but my memories of last weekend. Xavier never answered my question when I asked him if he regretted marrying me, but he way he touched me renewed the hope I’d lost, and my heart begins to race as I reach for the silk scarf around my neck.
My face had been beet red by the time we sat down for breakfast with Grams, my thighs bruised and my pussy sore from the countless time we did it, his intensity unmatched. It was like he was scared he’d never get to touch me again, like he knew he shouldn’t be indulging, and it made one thing very clear to me. He still loves me. I’d begun to wonder if maybe I was just misunderstanding why he was distancing himself from me, and maybe he’d simply started to fall out of love with me, but that night we spent together proved me wrong.
Grandma took one look at us and smirked, her eyes lighting up in a way they hadn’t in months. She thanked us for staying over and told me it was a relief to see how happy we were together, and I’d wondered what she saw that I didn’t, because I’d started to forget what it felt like to truly be happy. I’d grown tired of being the only one that still wanted to make this marriage work, of waiting for him to put me above his fears.
I sigh as I reach for my phone and click on my text messages. I haven’t spoken to him since last weekend, and every text message I sent went unanswered, every call ignored, and God, it hurts. I almost wish he hadn’t kissed me that night, hadn’t touched me, so I wouldn’t have gotten my hopes up only to find that nothing has changed.
Where do we go from here? I thought that I’d just have to be patient, that he needed to heal both his body and mind after what happened. I knew it triggered him, that it reminded him of losing Valeria, and I genuinely thought all he needed was time, but I’m not sure how much more my heart can take.
“Mrs. Kingston?”
I look up in surprise when Becky walks into my office, concern etched into her usually expressionless face. “What’s wrong?” I ask, instantly on high alert. Following what happened, Elijah had the glass on all properties I frequent changed to a type that’s near impossible to destroy, and the only car I’ve been driving is the armored one Xavier gave me. Silas gave me a new bracelet that can’t be removed, and I’m certain I’m now as safe as humanly possible, but that doesn’t mean all my loved ones are too.
“I… I need to take you to the hospital at once, ma’am.”
I rise to my feet in a rush, my stomach turning. “What happened?” I ask as I grab my bag and begin to move on autopilot, my body shaking.
“It’s your grandmother,” she says, her voice soft. “She was admitted urgently.”
I bite down on my lip harshly as Becky escorts me out of the building and into a car that’s waiting for us. “Mayor Kingston cleared the roads for us. We’ll be there soon,” Becky tells me before closing the door.
I try my best to control my breathing, to keep from panicking as I call Xavier, only for my call to go to voicemail after a few rings. I try again, and again, and again, until the hospital comes into view just as my call goes to voicemail again. “Please, Xavier. Please come to the hospital. It’s Grandma, and I need you. I don’t know what happened, but I’m scared, Xave. I can just feel it. Something is wrong, and I… God, I just really need you. I can’t do this alone. Please. Please.”
I take a deep breath and end the call when Becky opens the door for me, several bodyguards already waiting by the entrance. I’d give the world to have Xavier’s hand in mine right now, to hear his soothing, reassuring voice, telling me everything is going to be okay.
My heart drops when I find Ares and Raven standing in the hallway, in front of the room Grandma has been assigned. “Sierra,” Ares says, his voice breaking, and I freeze in place when he swallows hard, tears in his eyes. I bite down on my lip harshly, drawing blood, and he looks down, his eyes falling closed. “She’s gone.”
I shake my head, my legs losing strength as I stumble. Raven catches me and wraps her arms around me, holding me tightly as I fall apart, a sob tearing through my throat. “I’m sorry,” she whispers. “H-her organs began to f-fail, and it all happened s-so quickly,” she tells me through her tears. “We d-didn’t get here in time either.”
I cling to my best friend, my heart shattering into a million pieces as she gently directs me toward the room, but I’m not ready. I can’t see her, can’t accept this. “I saw her last w-weekend,” I cry. “She’s fine. She’s fine.”
Ares wraps his arms around us both and holds on tightly. “She was in pain, Sierra,” he says, his voice hoarse. “She’s at peace now.”
I look up when Dion, Faye, Lex, and Raya arrive. They take one look at us, and their expressions fall the way mine must have, disbelief crossing their faces. “Zane, Celeste, Luca, and Val are in the room,” Ares says. “We’ll go in next, to say our goodbyes.”
I feel sick when Raven squeezes my hand and leads me into the room, my head pounding painfully and my vision swimming. I try my best to breathe, but there isn’t enough air in the room, and I drop to my knees by Grandma’s bed, my hand gently covering hers as I cry my heart out. She looks like she’s sleeping, but her hand is just a little colder than I’m used to, and she doesn’t look quite like herself, though I can’t figure out why.
It isn’t until much later that I understand why she felt like a stranger. Her soul was long gone, and she took my heart right along with me.