The Curse of Thir

“I think you’ve got it easy, Theophilia. You get a two week vacation, whilst somebody else has to take care of everything. I have no idea why you keep complaining about it.” Gelnane sat in front of the dishevelled purple flower and allowed two drops of red liquid to fall onto the soil. His earlier run in with the princess and the Gavan incident had left him feeling rather talkative and upset.

“I don’t even know why I agreed to help. A bets a bet, you lay with what you’ve got, and you my friend, well you have got something good going for you.”

If a plant could look angry then this one did.

“You’re sixty years old, you look great, travel frequently and almost nobody knows about you and your condition. I on the other hand, well as you can see I command plenty but I am still ordered around by little girls and royal snobs, and I cannot leave because if I do, well they’ll call me a traitor and hunt me down. Not fair at all.” The angry plant vibrated.

“Eh? What do you mean I tricked you? I did no such thing. We made a bet you won and got your prize.” He stared at the plant with intent, it replied with a light wave of its leaf.

“Well that’s rude. You weren’t specific and you didn’t ask so I did not trick you.” Purples petals intensified in colour.

“Oh, this again... I told you, I’m not a full tree beast, if I where I would care even less about your issues than I already do besides I don’t have the same amount of magic as them. That means I could never do the same for you as I did for myself,” he got up from his stool, flicked through a large tomb looking book and mumbled, “and I’m barely keeping up with it know.” He gazed listlessly at the pages.

“Blah, blah, blah! Quit your prattle women, I’m helping you now aren’t I?” Woody fingers traced the pages.

“I still can’t believe that little brat of a princess spoke to me like that... Me a pet? I am my own master... for now.” He sighed deeply. The green stem lightened in colour and looked friendlier.

“Of course you would like her, just as insulting as you, perhaps a bit prettier though, like her mother. Now that was a queen.” The plant bristled.

“Shhh... get over it. Now... here it is. It should work, if not I’ll get to work on something else I read about.”

He stood in front of the expectant plant and began to speak in a low monotone voice that made the air quiver with anticipation.

“Teg al na oont ta allana tuog sheg ahana al toug.”

Looking directly at the plant he clicked his fingers and a green spark ignited on the tips. He dipped his wooden hand into the soil and let the fire spread around the plant. Instead of burning up it sank down into the soil, which glowed then disappeared.

“hmm..” He went back to the book and re read the page.

“I did that, I said that, then I did that and.... Oh.” He walked back to the potted plant and whispered something inaudible to it.

The green flames he had planted in the soil started up again and began climbing up the stems and leafs’, completely enveloping them in its magical inferno. Roots shot through the bottom of the pot, twining together to form crude looking feet and legs. The pot shattered completely showering the floor with soil as the plant continued with its metamorphoses. Stems and roots melded together at the waist working up to form the torso, thin and fibres like roots covered the top and bottom half of this weird creature. Its leafs twisted and thickened shooting out words and shaped rough looking hands, the petals of the flowers head dropped down to her shoulders revealing Theophilias’ face in a greenish yellow format with the purple fibre root for hair.

She coughed and gasped in shock.

“What... is this...Gelnane?” Flexing the leaf like hands she stared in horror as she realised they belonged to her.

“Well it’s what you wanted isn’t it?” He examined her petaled shoulders and plucked off a piece.

“OW!” Theophilia viewed him with disgust.

“So it does hurt. Interesting.” He walked to the large tomb book and scribbled a few notes with the feathery quill that lay next to it.

“What is this? What have you done to me?”

“You never are happy with anything are you? What happened to that fun girl I met sixty years ago?” He continued with his scribbles and ignored her struggling movements towards him.

“...I demand to know what you have done to me!” Her hand shot out towards Gelnane, closing the gap between them at a shocking rate and slapped him backwards. He reacted slowly and gripped the leafy elongated arm with his wooden one and pulled himself up.

“I’m going to have to write that sentence over now.” He sighed but did not let go of her arm. Twisting it he notices fine brown needles jutting threateningly out. He staggered slightly realizing his right side, where she had hit him, was now numb.

“Poisonous too it seems with the ability to effect plant matter. Well that’s a little unexpected.” Green flames swept over his right side healing him of any effects.

“Tell me what you have done! What new curse have you bestowed upon me?” Her face had gone a deeper shade of green to match her fury.

He gapped at her in shock.

“A new curse? It wasn’t a curse in the first place and neither is this, you halaghide!”

Her arm shot back to her side and she gazed intently at it wriggling the green edges she believed were her fingers.

“Not a curse? Really? Then what the THIR is this!”

“Can you move?”

“What?”

“I’m asking if you are capable of moving?”

She looked at him; her darkened seed like eyes accused him of stupidity.

“Of course I can. Are you blind or just dumb?”

“Neither. You on the other hand I am not too sure about.”

“What are you on about?”

“...really?”

Theophilia was beginning to feel foolish and she had no idea why.

“My dearest Theo, you are moving! Yet you are only four days into your two week “vacation.”Do you understand?”

“What?” Her petals fluffed up. “You said you’d make me better! Cure me of that curse! You’ve just made it worse.” Her roots wriggled about like the bodies of decapitated snakes.

“I did make you better! You can move and defend yourself now, and I never cursed you in the first place!” He walked back to his book and picked up his quill, Theophilia quivered with rage.

“You didn’t take it away!”

“I never said I could.” He scratched out what he had written and began again. “At least your thick headedness and lack of listening skills remains the same no matter how old you get.”

“You are an asshole!”

“I haven’t heard that one in awhile.”

“Fix me!” If she had blood running in her veins she believed it would be boiling at this point.

“There’s nothing to fix. You won what you wanted all those years ago.” He continued with his writing and didn’t even bat an eyelid when Theophilia hurled a shard of pot at his head and missed.

“I wanted immortality, not the ability to turn into a plant twice a year!”

“You know very well that immortality is impossible. Besides I gave you the next best thing, I’ve extended your life.”

“I’m a blasted plant person!”

“Well it is your own fault then, you weren’t specific.”

Soil and thorns hailed about the room.