The Bonus

“It’s not.”

“Yes. It is.”

Oh god…

“Why are you even looking at my private business?” I whisper.

“Because your troublemaking private business is hanging out in my bathroom.”

“I take offense,” I splutter as I feel the situation spiraling out of control. “And for your information, he is not a troublemaker, he’s a problem solver.”

“There are no problems to solve in this house,” she whispers angrily. “Put it away.” She rushes out of the bathroom and I hear her stomp up the hall.

I look down at myself, oil in one hand, tissues in the other, with my hard dick half hanging out of my boxer shorts. I’ve hit the bottom of the barrel.

Fuck.

Morning light shines through the windows and I sit on the edge of the bed fully dressed. I glance at my watch for the tenth time.

6:54 a.m.

What time does everyone get up in this house?

I’m usually up and dressed and on my way to work long before this.

I walk over to the window and open the curtains and look out at the view.

The sun is just rising, and there is a fog hanging over the lake, the sounds of birds chirp in the distance and trees sway in the wind. The view from up here is something else.

It’s beautiful, serene.

Unlike me.

I’ve spent the night horny and wanking, wondering if Dominic will come around and speak to me today before I leave, and then there’s the national disaster of the 2 a.m. bathroom visit… Hell, what a night.

She’s right, my dick is a troublemaker, a huge pain in my ass.

One thing is for certain: I’m still physically attracted to Grace.

Which is an absolute nightmare because I’m marrying someone else in four weeks’ time.

Creak…go the floorboards from up the hall, someone’s awake. I hear the bathroom door, and five minutes later, I hear the toilet flush, and then I hear the stairs go as someone walks down them.

Who was that, was it Grace?

My mind goes back to the horror of being caught with a hard-on and a bottle of oil at 2 a.m.

Ugh, how the hell do I talk myself out of that one?

Pretend it didn’t happen.

I’m going with that.

My door opens slightly and I turn to see two little brown eyes staring at me through the crack.

“Good morning, Lucia.” I tap the bed beside me. “Come in.”

She pushes the door open and smiles up at me. “Good morning.” My heart somersaults in my chest.

She’s all crumpled and sleepy, the cutest thing I ever saw in her little pink pajamas.

“How did you sleep?” I ask her as she walks in.

“Good.” She stands beside me. “How did you sleep?”

“I’ve had better nights.” I shrug.

She puts her little hand on my kneecap as we talk and oh… This day is perfect already.

“Where is your mom?”

“Downstairs.” We sit for a moment in silence. “Shall we go see Momma?” she eventually asks. “She likes to hug me good morning.”

“I bet she does.” I smile, damn if she isn’t the sweetest. “Let me get dressed and I’ll meet you down there.”

She looks me up and down. “But you’re already dressed.”

The truth is that I don’t want to face Grace yet, I’m stalling. This walk of shame is particularly rough. I glance down at myself as I search for an excuse not to come now. “I need to go to the bathroom.”

“Oh.” She looks at me. “To do a poo?”

What the fuck?

“I don’t think that’s something you should say to someone.”

“A wee, then?”

“Let’s not talk about bodily functions, shall we?” I frown.

“A bodily what?”

Jeez-uz.

“I’ll meet you downstairs,” I say, a little sterner.

“Okay.” With her little hand still on my knee, she smiles up at me as if waiting for me to say something.

“Okay…” I widen my eyes at her. What is she waiting for, am I supposed to say something here?

“Okay.” She keeps staring up at me all doe-eyed and it dawns on me, she’s as unsure what to do now as I am.

“I’m glad I met you,” I tell her.

Happiness beams from her smile, and just for a moment I feel my heart leave my chest. I push the hair back from her forehead as I stare at her beautiful little face. “You’re a lot like your mom.”

She gives a nervous little chuckle. “You look like Dom.”

My heart sinks. “Where is he?”

“Still sleeping.”

Hmm… Suddenly, I want to get downstairs quickly, I want to be down there before him. “Okay, run along and I’ll see you downstairs.”

She skips out of the room, and I watch her disappear as I smile after her. That was the best wake-up visit of all time.

I go to the bathroom and wash my face and with trepidation slowly walk down the stairs. I can hear Grace and Lucia talking and I stop midway up to listen to what they are saying.

“Where’s Dom?” Grace asks.

“Jupiter.”

“What do you mean?”

“The boys went to Jupiter to all get stupider.”

“I don’t think that’s very nice to boys, do you?”

“But it’s just a joke, don’t you get it?”

“Not a funny one.”

I find myself smiling as I listen to them talk, and they chatter on for a good while. It dawns on me that listening in on them is as creepy as all hell, so I step heavily on the bottom step so they hear me coming. “Good morning,” I say as I walk into the kitchen.

Lucia smiles broadly. “Good morning.”

“Morning,” Grace grumbles with her back to me as she makes her coffee.

I pull out a chair at the dining table and take a seat, my eyes linger on her rounded tight ass and my cock twinges in appreciation.

Stop!

“What’s happening today?” I ask to take my mind off the situation.

Grace turns toward me, and for the first time I see her face, makeup free and tousled hair.

Oh…she’s so lovely.

“You’re leaving,” she says abruptly.

My dick shrivels.

I nod, ashamed of my moonlight behavior.

She sips her coffee as her eyes hold mine.

I have no idea what’s going through her head right now, but I’m sure it’s evil.

I should have worn an armored vest.

“Apologies for…” I widen my eyes. “You know.”

“Not accepted.” She glares at me. “Do you want a coffee?”

“Sure.” I fake a smile. This is awkward as fuck. “Thank you.”

She turns to the coffee machine and my eyes drop down her body and linger on her ass once again. I feel a rush of blood to my loins.

Lock it up.

What the hell is going on here?

She passes me the cup of coffee. “I’m going out to hang the washing on the line,” she tells Lucia. “Are you okay in here with Gabriel?”

Lucia smiles broadly over at me. “Yes.”

Pride fills me.

Grace walks out the back door, and I wait until she is out of hearing range. “Does your mom have a boyfriend?” I ask Lucia.

“No.”

Hmm…

“Does she have any…” I pause as I try to articulate my words, “…man friends that come over sometimes?”

“Just Jack.”

“Jack?”

There’s a Jack?

“Who’s Jack?”

“Oh, he’s Dom’s Little League coach.”

“Oh…he is, is he?” I narrow my eyes, the old sporting coach lusting after the single mom trick…hey? “Isn’t that against some code of ethics or something?”

“Code of what?”

“Never mind.” I sip my coffee and the vile taste of burned poison hits my tongue. I cough and nearly choke.

What the…?

“What’s wrong?” Lucia frowns.

“This isn’t coffee.”

“What is it, then?”

“It’s a Molotov cocktail.” I wince.

This damn woman can’t cook for shit.

“A Molotov what…?”

Fuck me.

“You ask a lot of questions.” I cut her off.

“You say a lot of weird things…”

“Thank you for pointing that out.” I drag my hand down my face. The sooner I get out of here, the better… “That’s if I make it out alive before being poisoned to death,” I mutter under my breath.

“Who’s poisoning to death?”

“Nobody,” I snap. Dear lord, I’ve never wanted to scream Mind your own business at someone so much in my life.

I feel someone’s eyes on me, and I turn to see Dominic standing at the door, watching us. He’s in checked pajamas and his hair is standing on end. “Good morning, Dominic.” I force a smile, determined to do better with him today.

“Hi,” he grumbles as he walks into the kitchen. “Where’s Mom?”

“Out the back,” Lucia replies as she eats her cereal.

He walks straight past me and disappears out the back door, and I stand and watch him through the window. He walks out to Grace as she hangs the washing on the line. She gives him a big broad smile and drops to her knee and hugs him tight. They hug while he says something to her and she laughs and says something back.

My stomach twists with jealousy.

Of course he likes her more, she’s had him his entire life while I have been hidden and lied to.

Anger surges through me.

Fuck her.

I drop back into the chair and act casual as adrenaline surges through me.

Dominic walks up the stairs and into the house, and I snap out of my daydream. “Where’s the clean washing basket?” Dominic asks Lucia.

“Why?” She looks him up and down and chews as she eats.

I inwardly roll my eyes, what’s with this kid and the questions?

“I need my Little League uniform.”

She shrugs. “I don’t know.”

Does this house have no organization whatsoever?

He disappears into the laundry and I lower my voice. “Does Jack ever come over at night?” I whisper.

“I don’t know.”

“How don’t you know? You live here?” I whisper.

She shrugs.

I pinch the bridge of my nose in frustration. For a busybody child, she sure is light on useful information.

“What’s this?” Dominic says from the door.

I glance over to see him holding a big pink vibrator and my eyes widen. “Where did you get that?”

“It was in the washing basket among the clothes.”

I remember Grace carrying a basket of washing out of her room last night, she must have put it in there to hide it from me. I roll my lips to hide my smile.

“What is that?” Lucia frowns.

I stand and snatch it from him. “It’s a…” I look around the room as I search for an appropriate answer. “It’s a massager.”

“A massager?” Dominic frowns. “What do you massage with this?”

Pussy.

“Ahhh…” I hesitate while I troll my mind for an answer. “Necks and stuff.”

“What kind of massager is it?” Lucia asks.

I don’t fucking know…

“Kitty cat massager,” I reply.

Dominic frowns. “That’s weird.”

“I have to agree.”

I smile as satisfaction fills me.

Good old Jack is not getting the job done.

Grace

I peg the washing on the line with force. Who the hell does this imbecile think that he is, he barges in here, demands I give him a room and then disrespects me by having a raging erection at 2 a.m.

I get a vision of his hard dick and how beautiful it was.

Ughh…

I peg the clothes on hard. I hate this man and I hate that his dick is just hanging around in my house at night.

All hard and fuckable like. And he knows it, too, he knows how good his dick is and he’s just parading it around, and damn it I need to get laid stat.

My blood boils and I peg the last of the clothes on and march inside to find Dominic, Lucia and Gabriel sitting at the table, eating cereal together.

Hmm, this is all very civilized.

I pick up my coffee and take a sip and casually glance over to see something standing on end on the table in front of Gabriel.

Huh.

My vibrator…

I spit my coffee out. What the fuck? “What are you…what the hell…what are you doing?” I stammer.

“Eating my cereal.” Gabriel’s mischievous eyes hold mine. “Dom found your kitty cat massager in the washing basket.”

My eyes widen.

Gabriel smirks. “It’s a very small massager.”

No, no, no…this can’t be happening.

“Well…” I wobble my head around as I try to think of a comeback. “I have a very small neck,” I spit. “Stay away from my massagers.”

I march out of the room and into the hallway and put my head into my hands.

This is single-handedly the most embarrassing moment of my entire life.

How could I forget that it was in the washing basket?

What the hell is wrong with me…and of course he had to be here to see it.

Oh.

My.

God.

I want to die a thousand deaths.

With my heart thumping hard through my chest, I march upstairs.

I hate him, I hate everything about him.

This is all his fault, I was flustered when he showed up here and I stuffed it in that laundry basket and completely forgot about it because I don’t even feel comfortable in my own home. How dare he barge himself in here and sleep in my bedroom, that is a private place, my sanctuary.

I can hear Lucia chatting downstairs as I begin to pace back and forth in my bedroom.

With every lap on the carpet, I become more infuriated.

I’m not standing for this.

He needs to get out of this house right fucking now.

He’s one of the richest men in America, don’t tell me he can’t find a hotel.

I’m not buying it.

I storm downstairs and into the kitchen. “Gabriel, can I speak with you for a moment?” I announce.

Gabriel looks up from his cereal as if I am a major inconvenience. “Yes.”

“Alone.” I gesture to the stairs with my chin.

He rolls his eyes as I imagine myself throwing a full-blown punch to his stupid square jaw. “Back in a moment.” He fakes a smile to the kids.

I turn and march upstairs and then into my bedroom and he walks in behind me. “What?”

“Close the door,” I growl, and by the sound of my own voice, it’s clear the psychotic part of my brain has been well and truly activated.

He closes the door and puts his hands on his hips, arrogance personified. “What do you want?”

“You need to say goodbye to the children and get the hell out of my house.”

He narrows his eyes and steps forward. “I’ll leave when I am good and ready.”

“Listen here, you.” I poke him in the chest. “Your little midnight hard-on tells me that you are good and ready now, so…”

“I already apologized for that.”

“Not well enough.”

“Calm down.”

“Calm down!” I shriek. “I will not calm down.”

A trace of a smile crosses his face. “You’re annoyed about the massager.”

“I’m not annoyed, I’m fucking infuriated. How dare you invade my privacy.”

“Your son found it, what the hell did you want me to tell him, Mom’s been flogging her pussy with a fake dick?”

“You’re an animal.”

“We’ve already established this,” he fires back.

“You need to get out,” I spit.

“I’m trying,” he growls. “Stop the carry-on, do you think I want to stay here and…”

“And the wanking with the oil and the tissues…just what the fuck, Gabriel?”

“Why are you cursing so much, and come on.” He does smile this time. “You have to admit me being caught is pretty funny.”

“If you were a thirteen-year-old boy it’s funny, a grown man who is engaged to be married, it’s horrifying.”

“That wasn’t my fault,” he fires back. “It was yours.”

“How the hell is this my fault?” I shriek.

“Well…” He’s flustered and searching for words. He drags his hands through his dark hair. “Those sheets smell like you and…” He widens his eyes as if searching for divine guidance. “I am only human, you know?”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“Come off it, Gracie, stop acting naïve.” He rolls his eyes.

Gracie…

Hearing him call me Gracie brings back a sea of memories and I stare at him as my brain malfunctions.

“Don’t flatter yourself, Gabriel, I have zero attraction to you.”

That I’ll ever admit to.

“We are very alike,” he whispers angrily.

“We are nothing alike,” I fire back. “You think you’re God and I know you’re the devil.”

He finds that amusing and gives me a slow sexy smile. “A little difference in religion never hurt anyone.”

I feel the heat from his gaze all the way to my toes.

No…

Get him out of here, right now.

“Listen, just…” I throw my hands up in the air in defeat, I have no idea how to deal with this situation. “You really need to stop being so Gabriel Ferrara and start being more goodbye children. Go and say goodbye and leave.”

He exhales heavily before marching out of the room, and I hear him stomp down the stairs.

I stare after him to the sound of my heart pumping so hard that it’s nearly beating out of my chest.

This is my worst frigging nightmare.

Twenty minutes and ten panic attacks later, I make my way downstairs.

Calm, keep calm…everything is perfectly fine and I am totally calm.

“Are you coming to Dominic’s game?” I hear Lucy ask Gabriel.

No.

“Ahhh…” I hear Gabriel pause. “Would you like me to?”

“Yes,” Lucy says excitedly. “We can sit together.

Just fuck off back to New York already.

“Are we ready to go?” I call as I collect my car keys and handbag.

“Ready, Mom.”

“Go get in the car, guys.” I pass the car keys to Dom. They bounce out the front door and Gabriel appears out of the kitchen. He’s dressed in different clothes now, where did he get those? Is Mark in Greenville too, did he bring them? He’s wearing a gray T-shirt and jeans; his black hair has a messed-up wave to it and as his dark eyes hold mine, I feel my stomach flutter for the first time in a long time.

Russel and I broke up over a year ago and since then I’ve been on two dates with two losers. My flutters have been few and far between.

“What are you doing?” he says in his deep voice. “Go and get ready.”

“I am ready.”

His eyes drop down my body and back up to my face. “You’re not going out dressed like that.”

I look down at myself, have I got something spilled on me or something? “Like what?”

“You’re wearing gym clothes out in public?” He frowns.

“Yes, Gabriel. I am not a catwalk model like your fiancée, nor would I want to be. Go home to her.”

He narrows his eyes.

The sky has turned red, this man is the most infuriating sexist pig of all time. I stomp out and dive into the car and start the engine and he knocks on the window.

Adrenaline is pumping through my body and I glare at him through the window.

He knocks again.

“Mom…” Lucy says from the back seat. “What are you doing?”

Be the adult.

“Nothing.” I fake a smile and wind down the window as I act calm. “Yes, Gabriel.”

“I will come to the game before I leave this afternoon.”

“Okay.” I grip the steering wheel with white-knuckle force and widen my eyes at him.

Don’t push me, fucker…I am about to end you.

“So I will see you all later this afternoon, okay?” he says over me to the children in the backseat.

“Okay.” Lucy smiles.

Gabriel turns his attention to Dom. “I’ll see you this afternoon, Dominic?”

Dominic shrugs.

Gabriel’s cold eyes roam over to me and from the look on his face it’s obvious he blames me for Dominic’s hatred.

“This has nothing to do with me.”

He glares at me and I glare right back.

Screw you.

I pull out and drive down the road before I say something nasty and horrible in front of my children.

I need to be a better person…for them.

The crowd cheers and I sit in the stands and stare into space. I’m here in body, but mentally, I’m a million miles away.

Saturday afternoon at Little League, it’s mid-afternoon and the weight of the world is on my shoulders. As the adrenaline from our fight this morning left my body, it’s been replaced by a sense of melancholy.

I get a vision of him in his boxers last night, his bare chest and his hard dick…

Ugh…

As impossible as Gabriel is, I cannot deny the physical attraction I have for him. It’s deep in my soul and I now know for certain that I will never be rid of this curse.

I hate it, and damn it, I just need him to leave and go and get married.

Leave us the hell alone.

“You’re quiet,” Deb says from beside me. “You okay?”

I glance over to see Gabriel walk up the stairs and take a seat in the front row of chairs.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” I sigh. “I just have the feeling that my whole world is falling apart.”

Gabriel turns and looks around for me, our eyes lock and we stare at each other for a beat as something swirls between us.

I can’t put my finger on exactly what it is.

“Maybe your world isn’t falling apart,” Deb replies as her eyes linger on Gabriel, “Maybe it’s falling into place.”