The Bluff (Calamity Montana)

“I WANT A DIVORCE,” I repeated when Hux didn’t respond.

His eyebrows came together. “Can you . . . can you wait? I just got Savannah. I don’t want it to look suspicious, have the judge change his mind.”

Savannah. It had always been about Savannah. I knew that. Still, it hurt so deeply I struggled to stand. Did I mean anything to him?

No.

How could I have let myself forget that this was all fake? How could I be so stupid to fall in love with this man? Because he didn’t feel the same. Any affection between us had been a figment of my imagination. The ashes of my incinerated hopes were now scattered across the floor.

No matter how hard I tried, no matter how often I proved my loyalty, Hux was never going to let me in. He was never going to trust me.

He was never going to love me.

“Fine,” I whispered.

He nodded, his gaze dropping to the floor. And in true Hux fashion, he didn’t say another word.

The walls were closing in. The air was so heavy and thick that filling my lungs was nearly impossible. Staying here would suffocate me, so I darted to the coat hook and grabbed my purse. My hand was on the doorknob when Hux’s soft voice stopped me from making my escape.

“Ev?”

I didn’t turn. One look at him and I might crumble. “Yeah.”

“Thank you.”

He kept saying thank you. Always with the thank-yous. But this one shattered my heart into a thousand pieces. I didn’t want to be thanked. I didn’t want his gratitude.

I wanted him. Every broken, grumpy, beautiful piece.

“It didn’t have to be like this,” I whispered.

“Yes, it did. It was always going to end like this.”

Don’t cry. Not yet. “I guess we had some good fucks, right? That’s all this was. Just a fuck.”

His silence was too much to bear. Because in his silence was acceptance. Confirmation that all I’d ever been to him was a means to an end. A woman to warm his bed.

The door almost clipped me in the face as I threw it open and marched out of the gallery. I took the rear exit, not wanting to see Katie’s smug face if I entered the showroom.

She’d won. She’d gotten what she wanted. She’d have Hux and the gallery all to herself. She could steal from right under his nose and it was not my problem. Not anymore.

I dug the keys to the Tahoe from my purse but my thumb froze over the button to unlock the door.

This wasn’t mine; this was Hux’s. And where was I going? His home? That wasn’t mine either. I backed away from the SUV, terrified. The diamond ring on my hand burned into my skin and I slipped it off, tucking it into my pocket.

I had nothing.

I’d spent what little savings I’d had left to pay Kerrigan for rent. I hadn’t found a paying job to replenish my bank account. I had nothing.

And it was all my fault. Because I’d thought a pretend marriage was my calling.

I spun and raced from the alley, rounding the corner of the block and heading down First. My feet steered me automatically toward my apartment but before I could rush upstairs and have the emotional breakdown that was encroaching, curling like smoke and ready to drown me in flames, I heard my name.

“Everly!” Kerrigan waved from inside the gym as she rushed my way.

She was wearing a pair of overalls dotted with white paint. The splatter reminded me of Hux and my heart twisted. But ever the pretender, I faked happiness with a smile and finger wave. “Hey! The place looks great.”

“Thanks. I’m just doing some touch-ups and then I think, fingers crossed, we’ll be ready for the grand opening next week.” She beamed. “Want to get the first tour?”

No. “Sure!”

I followed her inside the gym, dredging up the memory of what it had looked like before. Dark and empty and dirty. Kerrigan had added large windows that overlooked the street, much like she had to the apartment upstairs, letting in natural light. There was a nice counter beyond the door where a receptionist would greet members.

Hire me. I opened my mouth, ready to beg for the job, but stopped. I was not long for Calamity, and I didn’t want to screw Kerrigan over when I skipped town.

“What do you think?” Kerrigan asked as she walked through the main space. It was open and airy. Mirrors lined one of the longest walls. A ballet bar ran along another. In the corner, a cage wrestled to contain large exercise balls. Yoga mats were rolled on a shelf. Kerrigan had found instructors to teach yoga, Pilates, Barre and Les Mills classes. Women and men of all ages were welcome here, including a once-a-week class for pregnant moms.

“You did an amazing job,” I told my friend.

“Thank you.”

The joy on her face was too much and my eyes filled. I tried to swipe them dry before she could see but damn those mirrors. They hid nothing.

“Hey.” She came over and touched my arm. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Everything.” I sniffled, fighting to pull myself together. “I, um . . . I might need to stay upstairs for a while. Is that okay?”

“Of course.” Understanding crossed her face. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really.” I dragged in a long breath, pulling myself together. “Maybe later.”

“I’m here, day or night. Just call.” Kerrigan pulled me into a hug that only made me want to cry harder, so I rushed a fast goodbye, hurried out of the gym and escaped to my apartment.

The place where Hux and I had begun.

The place where we would end.

I JERKED AWAKE, so disoriented that it took me a moment to remember where I was.

The apartment. The couch.

My head throbbed as I pushed myself up to rub the kink in my neck. What time was it? The light still streamed in from the windows. My phone was sandwiched between the cushions and after digging it out, I saw it was nearly six.

I’d cried myself to sleep and let most of this shitty day melt into oblivion.

Chatter from the street drifted upstairs and I shoved myself to my feet, shuffling toward the windows.

Once, this place had been my sanctuary. It had been my safe haven. But when I looked through the glass, the town wasn’t as vibrant and charming as it had been. The mountains weren’t as tall. The sky wasn’t as blue.

My marriage had dulled Calamity.

Good thing I was leaving.

Hux had asked me to wait, and though I’d agreed, nothing could make me stay. Maybe he could tell everyone that I’d gone on a vacation to visit family. That my vacation would be lasting longer than necessary. I didn’t care what lie he wanted to tell as long as it meant I could escape Montana and start over.

Again.

Groups of tourists moved along the sidewalks, stopping at different shops. No matter how hard I tried to stop them, my eyes darted to the gallery.

Katie was no doubt inside. There was another hour until she’d close.

A mixture of hatred and longing swelled. The failure of my marriage wasn’t Katie’s fault. Her actions had just been the catalyst. The twat. How could Hux believe her over me? How could he have such blind faith and devotion to a woman I was one hundred percent certain was stealing from him?

Fuck him.

How dare he make me feel guilty? How dare he ask anything from me?

Hux and Katie deserved each other.

My stomach growled and I lifted my chin. No, I wasn’t going to hide in here. I wasn’t going to act like I’d done something wrong.

Did Hux have any idea how much time I’d put into his books? No, he didn’t.

Did he have any notion how much I’d done for him? No, he didn’t.

Did he have any clue how much shit I’d taken from his friends and daughter? No, he did not.

Fuck him. I was done.

After I collected my things, Calamity was history. Reese Huxley was history. I’d spend a few precious days with Lucy, then I was putting Montana in my rearview mirror. My time here would be a blip in The Life and Times of Everly Christian. A footnote. I couldn’t afford a plane ticket, but I’d max out my credit card to reach whatever destination I deemed my next stop.

San Diego had a nice ring to it. So did New Orleans or Charlotte.

I stomped downstairs and when I reached the sidewalk, I turned away from the gallery in search of food. And wine. The White Oak had been tainted thanks to the run-in with Hux’s family. That, and I had no desire to go in there alone. Sunday evenings drew a huge crowd for their weekly prime rib dinner. So I kept on walking, breathing fire with every step, until I reached the Pizza Palace.

Hux didn’t like pineapple on his pizza. Well tonight, I was ordering my own pizza covered in pineapple. Double, no, triple pineapple.

And a big fuck you to my husband.

The hostess’s smile was bright as I walked inside, but one look at me and she cowered away. “H-hi.”

“Hi.” It came out clipped and irritated. “Table for one.”

Always one.

Forever one.

“Right this way.” She snatched a menu and napkin-rolled set of silverware, then led me to a table. I’d been in here once before with Lucy but never with Hux. That was part of its appeal. “I’ll take a glass of red wine.”

“Sure. I’ll bring you the wine menu.”

“I don’t need it. Anything red. If you don’t have red, then white is fine too. I’m not picky. It just needs alcohol.”

“Um . . . okay.” The hostess disappeared, hopefully to get my wine.

I flipped open the menu, scanning it even though I already knew I was ordering the pineapple extreme, when a familiar voice caught my attention and my entire body went stiff.

“Yes, Mom. I shut my phone off.”

No. Not tonight.

I looked up in time to see the hostess escort Savannah to a table. April and Julian weren’t far behind.

They all spotted me, sitting alone in the middle of the room, as a panicked craze set in.

Should I leave? I hadn’t officially ordered yet. I could sprint the hell out of here right now. But then they’d see me run. They’d think they’d won. And I would never, ever, let April see me as weak.

So I did what I did best. I plastered on my sugar-sweet smile, one I was so sick and tired of wearing, and held up my hand to wave.

“Hey, Savannah.”

“Hey.” She gave me a sad smile. It was the first time ever I’d seen her give me pity. She’d either overheard my argument with Hux or known that I’d left the gallery earlier because of a fight.

Well, I didn’t want her fucking pity.

I wanted wine. Lots and lots of wine.

The hostess, her smile bright again, stopped at the table right beside mine. “How’s this?”

For fuck’s sake. Could I catch a break?

Julian didn’t look my way, but the way he held his chin said I was nothing to him. I was lower than the flies buzzing around the dumpster out back.

Savannah seemed unsure where to look. She kept glancing at me only to let her gaze flicker between her mother and stepfather, like she was expecting an explosion and wasn’t sure who would blow up first.

Then there was April, who sat at the chair directly across from mine, making it impossible for me to look up and not have her in my line of sight.

She really was beautiful, with her blond hair and high cheekbones and pert nose. It was hard not to be envious of this woman. She’d had Hux’s affection. He’d loved her. Maybe he still loved her, something he just wouldn’t admit to himself.

They’d probably made a beautiful couple, and they’d made a gorgeous daughter.

Fuck them all.

They could talk about me all they wanted. I wasn’t sticking out a meal here. April could gloat around town that she’d won. What did I care? I was leaving.

I dropped ten bucks on the table and collected my purse. When I stood, I held my gaze steady on the door. I rounded my table and was almost past theirs when two words caught my ear.

“Gold digger.”

My feet stopped at April’s mumbled insult. That fury inside me bloomed to a rage so powerful, so hot, it burned as blue as Savannah’s eyes.

I turned, staring at her profile until she finally had the guts to look up. Then I fired my shot.

“Cunt.”

Never in my life had I enunciated a syllable so clearly.

Julian’s eyes whipped up from his phone.

The color drained from Savannah’s face, seeming to rush right to her mother’s reddening cheeks.

April gasped in outrage. “You’re a nasty bitch.”

I opened my mouth to tell her that she was a horrible mother for letting her husband slap her daughter. That she was a rotten influence for a child and, in general, a nasty human being. I opened my mouth to let loose every bad thing I knew or had heard about April and Julian Tosh, but I paused long enough to glance at Savannah.

One look, and every word died on my tongue.

She looked terrified. Maybe she knew exactly what I wanted to say.

I wouldn’t break Savannah’s confidence. She’d confessed the day of the farmhouse that Julian had slapped her. Later, she’d taken it back. There was a reason she hadn’t wanted anyone to know.

I wasn’t sure what it was, but that didn’t matter. Savannah’s reason was important to Savannah.

“Someday, karma is going to come and bite you in the ass, April,” I said with more confidence than I felt today. “I won’t be here to see it, but just know that when it does, I’ll be laughing at you. I’ll be applauding your demise.”

A sneer curled her lip, but I was already gone, shoving out the door and into the evening light.

It was peaceful outside. Birds chirped. A gentle breeze rustled tree leaves. The scent of lilacs floated in the air.

Not even this tranquil Montana evening could cool my temper as I tipped my head to the sky and screamed.

It was loud. It was long. It was overdue.

Across the street, a father was walking his kid on the sidewalk. Both looked at me like I’d grown a tail and horns.

“Sorry,” I called to them. The father was already tugging his kid to walk faster.

Ugh. I needed this day to end. But first, I had some purchases to make. The closest gas station was around the block and they’d have a toothbrush and toothpaste. They’d also have wine.

Except the universe was still working against me. Before I could disappear to buy necessities, Savannah burst through the restaurant’s door, her tennis shoes skidding to a stop as her hands collided with my back.

“Everly,” she breathed.

“Go inside, Savannah. Eat some pizza.” I didn’t have the energy to be the patient, loving stepmother tonight.

Her forehead furrowed as she took me in. “Are you okay?”

“No, sweetheart. I’m not okay.”

“Is it you and Dad?”

I sighed. There was no me and Dad. Not for much longer. “It’s complicated.”

“I’m not stupid.”

“No.” My shoulders sagged. “No, you’re not. But I’m not going to tell you about what’s happening with me and your dad. It’s not my place, so you’ll have to ask him.”

A cop-out? Absolutely. But I wasn’t a long-term part of this girl’s life.

“Go.” I jerked my chin at the door. “Have a nice dinner.”

She nodded, turning for the door, but stopped and whirled around again. “Why did you do that? Why did you call Mom a—”

“Don’t say it.” I held up my hand. God, I’d really called April a cunt. In front of her daughter. What the hell was happening to me? This might make things hard for Hux, and a part of me wished I could rewind time and start this all over again. But another part of me was proud.

Hux wouldn’t say it, but he was terrified of April and Julian. He had every right to fear their retaliation. They could always try and take Savannah away.

But I didn’t have that fear. If Nelson got angry because of my crass language, it wouldn’t matter. I’d be out of Savannah’s life before her seventeenth birthday.

“Why did you do that?” Savannah asked again.

I threw up my hands, wanting to scream and cry at the same time. “I don’t know. Probably because your mom is a . . . you-know-what. And I wish someone had cared enough about me to call my mother a you-know-what because sometimes, she is a you-know-what. But I don’t have that someone. You grow up and people don’t shout and scream and fight for you anymore. Not unless you’re really lucky.”

The break was coming. Emotion crashed over my shoulders and if I didn’t move my feet, I’d crumble into a puddle of tears, stuck forever outside the Pizza Palace. But before I left, she had to know.

“He loves you,” I whispered. “Your father loves you so much. Enough to fight. You’re a lucky girl, Savannah. I hope you know that.”

She stared at me with shock on her face and tears in her eyes.

I turned before she could see me cry, aiming my feet toward my apartment—the gas station was forgotten.

“Where are you going?” she called.

“Home.”

“But home is the other way.” She pointed across the street, toward Hux’s house.

I glanced over my shoulder and gave her a sad smile. “Goodbye, Savannah.”