The Bastard Queen (Viciously Yours #2)

Not responding, I clenched tightly around his fingers and dug my nails into the wooden edge of the desk behind my head. Panting, I rolled my hips against his hand as my back arched off the hard surface I was lying across. Jerking at the first touch of his tongue, I practically broke my spine trying to get both closer and farther away from the almost painful pleasure. His grip on my left thigh pushed up underneath the cloth of my tunic to press me back down against the desk while forcing me to spread my legs wider. The feeling of being so lewdly stretched open had me gasping at the feeling and pushing harder back against his fingers.

Lilly’s tongue swiped teasingly across my clit causing a fresh wave of arousal to crash into me. My lower abdomen tightened as he repeated the motion with all the urgency of sand turning into stone. The pressure in my core was almost too much but I needed more than this if I wanted cum. I tried rocking my hips higher but Cillian just pushed me back down and placed a soft kiss to my clit in pure evil retaliation. Breath leaving my chest in audible pants, I squirmed against the unbearable feeling of my orgasm hovering just out of reach. And cried out at the overwhelming sensation of teeth scraping over my delicate flesh.

Unable to continue like this, I unclenched one of my hands from around the edge of the desk to grip my breast tightly. Flexing my fingers over the stimulated flesh beneath my tunic I gasped in pleasure, my eyes rolling back as my hips jerked forward. The first roll of my orgasm flooded me but it was cruelly pushed away when Cillian ceased all movement and yanked my hand from my chest.

“Cillian, please.”

“What did I tell you the first time we had sex?”

Brain scrambled in sexual desperation, I shook my head at the man hovering above me and tried to thrust against his leather clad hips that were pressing down into mine.

A firm hand gripped my jaw and tipped my head, pulling my neck taunt, in order to look him right in the eye. Hooded eyes gazed down at me, anger simmering in their depths, “Your pleasure’s mine, Macha. Not yours. Don’t piss me off.”

Fuuuuck that’s hot, I thought, feeling a different feeling fill my chest at his possessiveness. The kind of feeling that made me want to stretch so the feeling would tingle throughout my body like live energy. Now, I wanted to piss him off.

Taking my silence as an answer, he locked his hands around my wrists pushing them against the desk as he rolled his hips into mine. The friction of his trousers against my bare flesh had my back arching, pressing us chest to chest while he grinded down against me. Lifting my legs, I wrapped them around his waist tightly and rocked breathlessly up against him. His hips continued their controlled rolling thrusts that drove me to the brink until he made the mistake of letting me go to step back for the moment. A mistake because I held my position for all of about ten seconds before my right hand dove between my thighs.

Fingers brushing against the wet folds, I closed my eyes and bit my lip while a groan pushed past my lips at the feeling of being filled again. Like the last time it was short lived because Lilly’s hand had my wrist slamming back against the desk with a grunt and the other sliding around my neck. My eyes opened to stare up at the furious Cillian, a storm building behind silver eyes. When he opened his mouth I cut him off with a grin, wrapped my legs back around his now naked hips and used my free hand to push his hand harder against my throat.

A deep groan came rumbling out from the back of his own as his eyes rolled slightly before his hips jerked forward burying himself to the hilt inside of me. His hard length was like a cool balm that had me gasping in relief until the heat returned at his thrusts. Arching into the brutal slam of his hips, I pushed my neck further into his hand as his grip tightened and cried out his name. Keeping up the hard jerk of his hips, he took my mouth in a kiss that was all tongue and clashing teeth.

A moan ripped from his mouth when I clenched down around him and he had to pull away to increase his speed. Staring up at him lost in my own mind numbing pleasure, I watched the muscles of his abdomen flex and contract as a bead of sweat rolled down the middle of his impressive chest. My tantalizing view disappeared behind my eyelids when he switched up the angle of his hips so that my clit was rubbed with every thrust and I was thrown head first into my orgasm. Body stringing tighter than a bow, I released a gasping fuck when unadulterated pleasure raced through me like a raging bull.

Blinded by ecstasy, I barely noticed when Lilly’s hand left my throat to slam straight through the wood beside my head in a roar of his own release. The feeling of his member pulsing inside me drew a low cry from my lips at the oversensitivity and had a smaller orgasm gently rocking through me. Panting, I blinked up at the ceiling of the tent trying to even out my heart rate and then slammed a hand against Cillian’s back when he shifted to move off me.

“Don’t you dare fucking move.” I gritted out, when he reawakened the tender flesh between my thighs.

He lifted his head from my neck to look at me tiredly, chest rising and falling like he’d just ran a thousand miles, “I can’t...just stay inside of you.”

“If you pull out, I will kill you.”

Lilly raised a silver brow and glanced at the bed before looking back at me, “Wouldn’t you rather be over there?”

I shook my head, “You literally pounded me into the desk and now you want to move to the bed?”

And he really had. Hell, I was surprised the thing was even still standing. With the pieces I broke off the edge, the hole Cillian punched in it, and the combined weight of two people over six feet? We should have crashed to the floor halfway through.

“You’re going to kill me.”

I gave him a look as he slipped his hands under my back, “Cillian. Don’t.”

“I’m going to do it.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Here we go.”

“No- motherfucker.” I pushed the words out between my teeth viciously as he stood, holding me against him as his member slipped free and an uncomfortable ache pulsed at my core. “I hate you.”

The asshole just snorted before laying us in bed and pulling the covers over our nude forms. Lilly sighed, turning me to face him and pushing a damp lock of blue hair off my forehead, “We can’t mate yet.”

Internally, I released a breath of relief that we were on the same page without me having to say anything, “I know. Not until the war is over.”

“I have to leave soon.”

I nodded, “I figured and you still need to give me that list of Unseelie to visit.”

He stiffened slightly, “Who’s going with you?”

“I was thinking I’d take Bria and Baris along with Erick. Plus a few soldiers, of course.”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea to take Baris. He’s an idiot.”

I shook my head and brushed my thumb over his jawline, “Don’t worry, I straightened him out.”

“What’d you do?” He asked, looking amused.

I grinned, “I told him I beheaded you.”

“And he believed you?” He laughed.

“Duh, and then I told him the truth and stabbed him in the shoulder.”

He smirked, mirth shining deep in his eyes, “That boy really is an idiot.”

Rolling my eyes, I gave him a push before asking him a question that wiggled at the back of my mind, “You refused to tell me why you sent me to Slykhelm because you didn’t want to reveal that it wasn’t your idea. Why, after what it sounds like your father did to your family?”

“Because he was your family. You didn’t have anyone, so I was okay with you hating me if it meant you still had a connection with someone. It would have broken your heart to find out.”

“It did.” I shrugged, meeting his sincere eyes. “But I’m a Divine now so it doesn’t bother me. I think the part that cared for him was burned away.”

Lilly hummed, “How does it feel being a Divine?”

I furrowed my brows a bit before telling him, “It honestly doesn’t any different. We put so much pressure of me transforming that it almost feels like a let down. There is a strange thrum of energy coursing through me though, and traveling is different.”

“Different how?”

“I can see while I travel. I see everything that I’m passing through, through some strange blue film.”

“So it’s not total darkness anymore?”

“Nope.” I replied, popping the p. Enjoying his look of confusion.

Shaking his head, he looped an arm around my waist and tugged me closer until I was tucked underneath his chin, “You still haven’t used your abilities yet. Maybe you have more.”

I hummed in content at the warmth he radiated and the tiredness threatening to lull me to sleep. And it almost worked too, until I suddenly remembered that I had something to give him before he left. Eyes flying open, I pushed against him until with a grunt he released me from his steel grip. Sitting up, I winced a little and then stared down into his eyes.

Eyeing me right back, he lazily pushed himself up against the headboard, “What?”

“I have something to give you.”

“Okay.” But when I just continued to stare, he raised a brow, “Are you going to give it to me?”

I nodded slowly, thinking about my wording, “Yes. Originally it was going to be me giving you something because you gave me the necklace. But-”

“You don’t need to give me anything. That necklace was a gift, I made it for you.”

Shocked, I placed a hand over the pedant hanging around my neck, “You made this?”

“Yeah, a while ago actually.” He replied, turning his head away in a surprisingly shy manner.

Grinning, I bounced a little on the mattress, “How long ago is a while ago?”

“Are you going to give me something or not?” He grumbled, peeking at me from the corner of his eye.

Leaning forward, I pinched his cheek and gave it a little jiggle while awwing at his cuteness.

Smacking my hand away with a sneer, he went to stand but I stopped him by throwing myself across his lap, “Alright, alright. Relax, you’re just so secretly cute.”

“I. Am not. Cute.”

Cackling, I muttered, “Exactly, what a cute person would say.”

“What was that?” He barked.

“Nothing. Nothing.”

“If I’m cute, then you’re down right adorable.”

Gasping in disgust, I rolled off his lap to sit in front of him, “Don’t ever call me that again.”

Cillian smirked and mimicked, “Exactly, what an adorable person would say.”

“Do you want your gift or not?” I snapped.

With a raised brow, he crossed his arms and leaned back against the headboard.

Rolling my eyes with a huff at his actions, I held a hand out to either side and call- The cool touch of metal pressed into the palms of hands before I could even properly call it. Blinking in shock, I looked left and then right to find Lilly’s gift despite the fact that I didn’t finish calling it to bend to my will. A little freaked out at the ease with which I had gotten the battle axes, I decided to ignore it.

Facing forward, I grinned at the wide silver eyes taking in the blue metal twisted into two expertly crafted axes, “So as I was saying, originally they were supposed to be a regular gift but I figured you might be willing to accept them as a mating gift. I know we can’t get mated publicly yet but we can still do the gift exchange.”

Slack jawed, his eyes continued to roam over the metal until I held them out for him to take. Anxiety built in my chest as he gently placed a hand over the cool metal of one to feel the small ridges in the handle to make them easier to grip. The rest of the metal was smooth to the touch and curved out gently to take on the sharper shape of the axe’s blade. I watched his hands reach out to fully grasp onto the handles and take them when he pulled away quickly.

Eyeing his taunt features, I looked at the weapons with disappointment, “Do you not like them? I can always adjust the metal more to your liking, I had your mother help me but we didn’t have a lot of time and I should have realized you might have different preferences.”

Lilly immediately disagreed, “No, I love them. They’re great, they look amazing. It’s just…”

“Just what?”

“I don’t have anything to give you.”

I shook my head at his uncomfortable expression and smiled, “Lilly, you already gave me the pedant. You don’t need to give me anything.”

“I can’t just give you nothing as a mating gift, Macha. I refuse. You’re giving me battle axes crafted out of your own personal metal, and you want me to give you nothing in return? Absolutely not.”

“And you crafted a Fae diamond into a pendant for me. I think we’re even.” I replied, thrusting the weapons at him for him to take.

“No.”

Annoyed, I pushed the weapons up against his chest, “Don’t be an dick. I’m trying to be all sweet and sentimental and you’re ruining it.”

He gave me a stubborn look and did nothing to take the weapons from me, “Mating gifts symbolize more than just a gift from the heart and you know it. It signifies that the pair will never forget to cherish the other. You’re not going to make me the selfish one before our mating even begins.”

“Fine. Then I accept the sex we just had as my mating gift.”

Cillian leered at me, “That doesn’t qualify as a gift because you’ll be getting that regularly.”

“Lilly, you are being unnecessarily difficult.” I whined between laughs at his expression.

He glared before his expression suddenly lit up before going dark again.

“What did you just think of?”

“Forget it. You won’t like it.”

I rolled my eyes and tossed the axes beside us while ignoring his wince at the way they clanged together, “Honestly? What do I like at this point?”

“Okay. There is something I could give you.” Cillian took a deep breath before continuing, “I can make it so we can mentally communicate.”

Instantly, I was swamped with hesitation and it showed when I replied slowly, “But...I thought you said that you could only share that with a mate. Cillian, we can’t get mated until the war is over. You wouldn’t be able to go back to Mab’s army and it would paint a huge target on your back during the war.”

“I know. I know. And I completely agree, this would be temporary. I can temporarily link us mentally so that we can speak whenever we want. Which would be a huge advantage during the war because who knows how long we’re going to be apart.”

Shifting on my knees I scanned over his features, a bit uncomfortable at how much he seemed to want this, “It would be. But...you’ll be in my head? Will you-will you be able to see things? Like my memories?”

His throat constricted as he reached out to interlock our fingers, “There’s a possibility that I could be drawn into your nightmares, if we’re sleeping at the same time. But I will never be capable of digging around in your mind or memories. The link is only for communication but again there is the possibility that it could connect our dreams.”

“I don’t know, Lilly.” I grimaced, lip slightly raised in apprehension.

“I understand but the chances of us being asleep at the same time on opposite sides of the war are extremely unlikely. If I’m being honest, being able to contact or warn you of something within seconds would be a huge help to my piece of mind while we’re apart.”

The thought of having someone else in my head was completely unnerving and intimate. He wasn’t asking to put a ring on my finger and to move his stuff into my tent, he was asking to be let inside my mind. My mind. Half the time I didn’t even know what the hell was going on in here, how was I supposed to just let him in? There was also a lot of shit that I wasn’t ready to tell him, most of it being about Slykhelm. What if he was lying? What if this is just a way to force me to open up to him?

Standing from the bed, I started pacing the width of it as I thought about my answer. No, Lilly wouldn’t lie about something like this. If he said he wouldn’t be able to see my memories then he wasn’t going to be able to. But the nightmares? Was I willing to take the chance that he could be pulled into one with me? Then again, I had no idea if that part of my soul had burned away. Alright, Macha. What’s the real question? Do you trust him? I nearly scoffed out loud, of course, I trusted him. Though this level of trust was severely different, it wasn’t the question of if I trusted him with my life. It was a question of if I trusted him to see my most vulnerable moments.

Glancing at him, I caught the way he was calmly watching me pace without a word before darting my eyes to the floor. He was my mate and although I didn’t love him yet, I cared for him. That much was obvious and would soon be to everyone else when he started wielding those axes. You didn’t make weapons from your own personal metal for just anybody. What was I saying? I died saving him. It was impossible to go through everything we had together and still feel nothing for the other. But this was a huge step and I was almost positive that we had missed a few on the way to this one.

Could I do it? Could I make myself vulnerable for him? Was I willing to risk….was I really willing to risk my facade of unending strength? Vulnerability wasn’t something I had ever allowed myself to share but could I share it for him? For Cillian Grymes?

“Macha, you can say-”

“Yes.” I cut off his smooth baritone, nails digging into the side of my thigh while my heart fought to escape my chest. Cleaning my throat, I repeated,“Yes. I accept your mating gift.”

I could feel his eyes on the back of my head and hear the creak of the wood as he left the bed. Hyper aware of his every move, I felt the heat of his skin before his hands slid over my clothed shoulders to hug me tightly from behind. Eyes pinned to the otherside of the tent, I swallowed around a dry throat as his chin pressed against my temple.

“You don’t have to do this. If I pressured you, I’m sorry. We can always communicate through Bria.”

Opening my mouth, the words failed to come as the fear of him witnessing what I had gone through paralyzed me. Though the thought of him treating me differently killed me.“If you promise me one thing.”

“Name it.”

“Whatever you see in my nightmares,” I gritted out between clenched teeth. “Whatever you see, isn’t mentioned unless I bring it up. And it doesn’t change the way you act around me.”

His grip around me tightened before he tried to turn me around, “Macha…”

“I’m serious. I don’t want to talk about what I went through. I don’t care if you suddenly have a front row seat to those memories. I don’t want to talk about them. I’d also rather have you leave me then treat me differently.” I replied in a hard tone, refusing to be turned around to face him.

“Why?”

“Because there’s nothing to talk about. Nothing to work through. Those nightmares don’t define me. I’m not some delicate fucking flower and I will resent you if you start treating me like one.”

“I wouldn’t.”

Whipping around, I glared up at him, “I mean it, Cillian. Promise me because I’m not joking.”

Raising his hands to cup the sides of my face, he peered down at me with a tenderness I wouldn’t have thought him capable of. “I promise, Cell Bait...You’re too much of a bloodthirsty bitch to ever treat delicately.”

“Fuck you.” I blurted, mood instantaneously lifting.

Lilly laughed before dropping a quick kiss on my lips, “Hopefully after this you can. Give me your wrist.”

Without question, I gave him my wrist, “How do we do this?”

“It’s pretty simple. We bite each other.”

I raised a brow, “That’s it?”

“Yeah.”

Shrugging, I shifted my teeth into sharpened points and grinned, “Where?”

Flashing his own sharpened teeth at me, he lifted my wrist to his mouth and bit deeply. Blood began pooling around his lips as white hot pain flashed through me like searing jolts of lightning. Flexing my fingers, I wiggled them to make sure he hadn’t punctured any nerves from the way his jaws were wrapped around the whole right side of my wrist.

With a ripping sensation followed by more pain, he yanked his teeth from my wrist and frowned, “Do you have something in your wrist?”

Looks like I didn’t need to go looking for that needle then. I can’t believe Malachy really thought it would have drifted.

“Yes. Veins, muscle, and bone.” I sassed. “Now where do I bite you?”

Giving my wrist one last look, he tapped the top of his shoulder, “It’s going to leave a scar until the effects fade. I can’t risk Mab figuring out what it is.”

“Anything to leave your mark.” I muttered, rolling my eyes at the new scar soon to be decorating my silver tatted wrist. “My turn.”

Bouncing up a little on my toes, I leaned forward and locked my teeth viciously around the flesh of his shoulder. It was an odd sensation, having someone’s bleeding flesh in your mouth and I found that I enjoyed it. Tasting blood in my mouth, I yanked my head back making Cillian hiss out in pain.

Wiping the blood from my lips, I smirked, “Don’t be a baby.”

“You almost ripped a chunk out of my shoulder.” He growled, pressing on the flesh.

“Consider it payback for telling me that the bite will scar after you bite me where everyone will notice.”

Silver eyes narrowed on mine before he huffed, lips curving upwards.

I laughed, “That’s right, don’t even bother denying it. Now, when is this thing supposed to kick in?”

“You should start to feel something in the back of your head any second now.”

Nodding, I looked around as I tried feeling anything odd in my head. Nothing happened for a few seconds and then a wiggling started at the base of my neck. Eyes shooting to Cillian’s silver ones, I kept my gaze on him while the feeling got stronger. It felt like a growing pressure that was moving along the sides of my brain trying to find a way in. The sensation was unpleasant but the pressure also felt familiar like I had felt it before.

“Let me in.”

“That’s you?”

He grinned boyishly, “Just relax and let me in. I’ll be gentle.”

“Stop talking to me like I’m a virgin before I deck you in the throat.”

Lilly laughed and stared as if waiting for me.

Sighing, I pushed all the air from my lungs and thought about the pressure decreasing as I let it in. Like a popping balloon it disappeared and my head felt oddly full.

Can you hear me, Cell Bait?

Eyes going as wide as possible, I glued them to a laughing Cillian. Tentatively, I thought, Cillian? Is that you?

Know somebody else who calls you Cell Bait?

Holy shit! This is fucking weird.

Lilly smiled, You’ll get used to it.

No way. You’re in my head. Does this thing have a distance range?

He shook his head, I could be on earth right now and we’d still be able to talk.

That’s insane. I mentally replied while laughing at the way it looked like we were just silently grinning at each other if anybody walked in.

I’m really glad you agreed to do this. I feel so much better about leaving now that I can contact you whenever.

Placing a hand on his cheek, I gave it a pat with a sympathetic smile, Me too. But don’t thank me yet. Welcome to my mind, Lilly. We’re all mad here.

Silver brows dipped lightly, What?

We really need to get a T.V. so you can start appreciating my references. I huffed, dropping my hand from his cheek.

What’s a T.V?

Slapping a hand against his face, I pushed him away from me with a badly hidden smile, Okay, now I know your fucking with me.

Grabbing onto my wrist with a laugh, he shoved me onto the bed hard enough to make me bounce on the mattress. It’s like you can tell the future now.

His hard body landed on mine as I chuckled, Don’t you have to go?

You don’t want to have a quickie? Might be awhile until the next time we can have sex.

Divines, is sex all you think about?

Pushing up on his elbows to look down at me, he raised a brow, That’d be you, Cell Bait.

Laughing loudly, I slapped my hand against his cheeks and brought his lips to mine, In that case...you better make that a few quickies, Your Majesty. If you can handle that.

I’ll try my best, Peasant.

——

Y’all....not to hype myself up but I think I getting better at writing these sex scenes. I used to be so embarrassed writing them in Feral Born and now I’m over here writing scenes with my main character getting choked out and loving it. Lmao. I absolutely adore Macha and Cillians dynamic, they’re so fun to write

As always, tell me how you feel about the chapter or book so far! The next chapter will be in Cillians POV and we’ll be taking a medium sized time jump.

Happy Thanksgiving, Verbage🦃