SWNOVELS : Chapter 79
Fiona
I opened my eyes with difficulty, rubbing sleep away from the corners. Through the window I saw the sky was darkening, glowing deep blue. I’d been out cold all afternoon.
I hadn’t intended to nap the day away, but it had been very helpful. I sat up and felt refreshed for the first time in days, my head clear and my body full of energy.
There was a note on my bedside table. A small white slip of paper folded in half, with my name on it in the same swoopy cursive writing that I’d seen on the card Alexander sent to my office.
“I hope you’re feeling better after getting some rest,”
the note read. “I am out running an errand. Will you please join me for a late dinner tonight when I return?
The knock on our bedroom door was gentle, but it alarmed me anyway. I wasn’t expecting anyone here except Alexander. I peeked through the peephole and my adrenaline started to settle down once I saw his beta standing there, a couple yards back from the door.
“Kayden,” I said, opening the door. “This is a surprise.”
“Hey, Fiona. Sorry to just show up at your doorstep like this, but Alex asked me to check in on you. He said you might be sleeping and he didn’t want to wake you. But I saw your lights were on and just thought I’d check in. See if you needed anything while he’s out.”
“That’s nice of you. Come in.” I offered a polite smile and stood aside, motioning for Kayden to please enter.
He was politely hesitant, clearly not wanting to intrude if I wasn’t feeling up to company, and kept an almost too-courteous distance from me as he stepped inside and moved across the room. I discerned his awkwardness with me, especially in the context of a bedroom, to be a display of total deference and loyalty to his Alpha. I could understand that kind of deeply-instilled instinct, and respected it.
“How are you?” I asked, feeling a bit awkward myself.
I realized that Kayden and I had never been alone together before, had never held a conversation between just the two of us.
“I’m good,” he replied, shrugging. “And how are you?”
The awkwardness was getting unbearable, fast. I decided we needed to do away with the pleasantries.
“I’m just fine, thank you. Please make yourself comfortable.” I motioned to a chair and he sat. “Listen, if it’s alright with you, could I actually ask you a couple of questions while I have you here?”
“Sure,” he said eagerly. “What’s up? What can I do for you?”
“Sure,” he said eagerly. “What’s up? What can I do for you?”
“How long have you known Alexander?” I seated myself across the table.
“As long as I can remember. Our whole lives, pretty much. Why?”
I rallied some courage and dared to edge into more personal territory with my next question. “Did he tell you about what happened with us the other day? At my office?”
Kayden’s cheeks flushed and he looked away. “Yeah, he told me a little. He’s been very upset over it.”
“Has he always been like this?” I blurted out next.
Kayden looked confused. “Been like… what?”
I narrowed my eyes, first pondering how to answer, then realizing I did not need to. Kayden knew what I was talking about.
“Alexander is a great warrior,” he finally said. “The greatest of our time. He and I have spent our entire adult lives at war together. It’s difficult to explain to those who have not lived the same kind of life.”
“Why has it affected him so much, though? Moreso than… for example, you? Perhaps even other Alphas, other great leaders? I know that you have heard what people say about Alexander.”
Kayden nodded reluctantly. “They say that he is unstoppable.”
“Murderous,” I added. “Heartless. A monster.”
He shook his head. “People say all kinds of things.
Alex isn’t heartless, I can tell you that for sure. But yes, he did used to be different. It wasn’t war, though, that changed him.” Kayden bit his lip, hesitating. He wasn’t sure whether he should tell me what he’d been about to tell me.
I waited patiently for him to continue. Sometimes that’s all you need to do to get someone to talk.
People don’t like silence – they’re compelled to fill it.
Kayden had very nice teeth, I noted while waiting him
out. Perfect and pearly white, striking in contrast to his olive complexion and pitch black hair.
Finally he broke down and asked, “Has he ever talked to you about his mother?”
I frowned. Alexander and I were in a relationship, sure. We were engaged to be married. But it was an arrangement, or so we’d both always said, and I never really could tell what Alexander wanted from me anyway, so I wasn’t about to let myself fall in love with him. We had not been sitting around pouring our hearts out to each other. The longest conversations we ever had were about work.
“No,” I answered simply.
Kayden nodded understandingly. He seemed to be a very even-tempered person. He was more comfortable to talk to than I’d expected. I could see why this was Alexander’s second-in-command, his most trusted soldier and his best friend.
“She died while we were away,” Kayden said. “We were both nineteen. Neither of us had been in combat yet when the war started. No one knows how they got the troops’ locations, but the vampires ambushed all the active forces, slaughtering thousands of wolves, including every Alpha leader on the field. Alex was sent to lead the few remaining troops in a counterstrike. I went with him. And we’d just won our first battle – a brutal one, which we barely came through alive – when he received the news of his mother’s death.”
“That must have been hard for him.”
“Yes.” Kayden got a faraway look in his eyes. “He felt
guilty that he didn’t get to say goodbye. After that, combat became his only purpose. Hm. I guess you’re right. He did internalize the war more than any of the rest of us. He’s our Alpha, though. It’s what’s expected of him anyway. But I think the worst thing for Alex is that he’ll just never forgive himself for not being there to protect his mother, at the end…”
“Protect her?” My eyebrows shot up. “I thought his mother died of an illness. Didn’t she?”
Kayden’s eyes darted away from mine again. “I guess I meant to say, to take care of her. When she was sick.”
“Hm.” Curiosity made me want to ask more questions about this, but I reasoned I might have already pushed my luck far enough. Kayden was starting to look uncomfortable. “Thank you,” I said with a polite smile. “I appreciate you checking in on me tonight,
truly. It was nice to have some company and I enjoyed talking with you.”
“The pleasure was mine, Fiona.” Kayden inclined his head slightly in a polite bow before heading for the door.
I was right behind him with my hand on the doorknob, ready to say goodbye, when he paused and swiveled on his heel to face me again.
He said, “Alex is lucky to have you, you know. You’ve been really good for him. And he does know it.” Then he gave me a stiff, closed-lip smile, turned again and disappeared down the hall before I could think of anything to say in response.