SWNOVELS That Summer : Chapter 8
I flick open one eye and quickly close it to shut out the light as I weigh waking up versus going back to sleep.
I’m so incredibly comfortable.
Fluffy bed.
Soft sheets.
The perfect pillow. I put my hand out to tuck the pillow under my neck—
Wait.
I look up, opening one eye again.
White beadboard vaulted ceiling. White walls. Nautical flags.
A soft noise.
I pat the spot where my pillow should be, my hand landing on warm, bare skin.
I sit up with a start and fully realize where I am.
In the boathouse.
In bed.
With Chase.
His chest as my pillow.
My head feels fuzzy. I think back to last night.
Did I drink too much?
No. I only had one beer during happy hour, and I didn’t even drink the whole thing before it got warm.
The rest of the night, I gorged on fresh-squeezed lemonade.
And Chase.
Can kissing while watching fireworks leave you feeling hungover?
And how the heck did I get down here?
“Morning,” Chase murmurs and kisses the top of my head.
“I’m in your bed,” I blurt out, internally freaking.
Why am I freaking out? Is it because I can’t remember or because I’m worried I did more than kiss him?
The big question is, Do I want to do more than kiss Chase?
Instead, I say, “I don’t remember how I got here.”
Chase chuckles and rolls over toward me. He pushes my hair back off my face. “Clearly, I’m gonna have to up my game.”
“What do you mean?”
“You fell asleep while you were kissing me. I don’t know if I should take that as a compliment or as a failure. Either way, it was easier to carry you from the roof to here than all the way up to your room in the house.”
“And we just slept, right?”
“Uh, yeah,” he says. “It’s not like we haven’t slept in the same bed many times before.”
“We kissed, Chase.”
“We’ve kissed before,” he counters.
“Did it, um, feel different to you?” I ask him.
“Kissing you is always amazing. I wish I could do it every day.” His eyes sparkle at me before narrowing. “But, as you made clear the other day, we’re just friends. Good friends. Best friends. But still, just friends.”
“Friends with benefits,” I quip.
Chase lets out a sigh. “While kissing is a nice benefit, for sure, I don’t think that terminology accurately describes our relationship.”
“Yeah, I guess.”
He slides his hand from my shoulder, down my arm, and onto the side of my leg. It sends a shiver through me in a way that feels like more than friends. I look into his eyes, getting caught up in them.
So caught up that I just sigh dreamily and don’t say a word.
“Do you have any plans for today?” he finally says, breaking the silence.
I don’t know how long exactly it was that we just stared at each other. Or what it means that I want to curl into him and have him never let me go.
“I think it’s pretty obvious that I haven’t been keeping up with the calendar. What’s on it?”
“Fishing for some.” He holds up his arm and looks at his watch. It’s got a huge face, and it used to dwarf his wrist, but it must have grown along with the rest of him.
I shut my eyes tightly, willing myself not to think about what else might have grown since the last time I saw him naked.
I need to get out of this bed.
“Yeah, let’s go fishing,” I suggest, but I still don’t move.
“It’s nearly ten,” he says with a laugh. “I need to lift, but I think we should work on your goal of getting up on one ski.”
“Oh, that.”
“Do you not want to anymore?”
I sigh. “Of course I do.”
“But what?”
“I always feel so unsteady.”
“I’m going to get in the water with you this time. Hold you straight until the boat pulls you up. I’ll tell you exactly how to do it. Once you do it, you’ll want to do it all the time.”
I gulp. Why does that sound like a threat—or a promise maybe—about something else entirely?
“I’m sure I will,” I say, finally moving. I throw the covers off, finding myself still in the sundress I had on last night.
Why that’s a surprise, I have no idea, but the thought rolls through my brain that maybe Chase doesn’t want me. Maybe he really wants Kelsey. Maybe he thinks I’m too young for him.
Wouldn’t that be ironic?
Chase sits up, the crisp white sheet seeming to move in slow motion, drifting delicately from his pecs down to his strong core and into his lap. As he leans toward me, his ab muscles flex. A grin forms on his face as he pats his perfect stomach.
I can’t help but roll my eyes. “Wild guess. We need to feed the beast first?”
“Definitely. But just a protein shake will be good. I have everything I need to make them down here. And some fruit that we can take out on the boat. Mom made me a big batch of whipped dates to dip my apples in. We could take that, too.”
“Okay, I’ll go, you know, put on a swimsuit.”
As I start to get out of bed, he reaches out with lightning speed and grabs my forearm, pulling me straight back to his lips.
He gives me the kind of kiss that is so good, it almost shatters my resolve.
Neither one of us says anything as I leave. I suppose the kiss said it all.
Chase is fed and watered and has lifted weights.
Now, we’re out in the water, my bikini-clad ass sitting in Chase’s hands as he holds me steady while I try to put the slalom ski back on my feet.
“I don’t think I can do it.” I pout. “I’ve tried getting up on one ski, what, six times now? I just keep going over sideways. It’s not fun anymore. And you’re probably sick of floating out here.”
He gives my ass a little squeeze. “Yeah, I think I’m good.”
“Chase!” I screech.
“Haley!” he yells out. “Get the camera ready! She’s got it this time, and we need it on video!”
“Your pretend confidence isn’t going to help,” I complain. I’m a mess. I’ve fallen so many times that I don’t even care anymore.
“Sure it is,” he says softly from behind me. “All of those falls have been leading up to that one perfect moment where everything comes together. This time, the second you hear the boat start, I want you to push your legs out.”
“What? Why would I do that?”
“Because you’re trying to stand yourself up instead of letting the boat pull you up. Trust me. Get in position. I want the back of the ski touching your butt. Then, take in a big breath, lean back, push your legs out, and keep your arms locked in position. I know it will be hard for you to give up control for just a minute, but that’s the beauty of life. Sometimes, you just have to lean back and go for a ride.”
I twist my head around to look at him, my eyes wide. Since the other day when I realized my best friend has gotten hot, it’s like my mind has gone crazy, finding hidden sexual meaning in everything that he says.
He places a sweet kiss on my cheek.
And my mind clears.
Maybe I can do this.
“Hit it!” I yell out to his dad, who has been equally patient, driving the boat.
All of a sudden, I hear the sound of the boat’s motor. I pull in a breath and hold it while I lean back, pushing my legs out, and in what feels like a second, I realize I’m up on top of the water.
I panic for a minute, wondering what to do, but the rest comes naturally. I’ve been kicking off one ski for years. Chase always says that it’s a balance thing. That it’s actually harder to go from the forward position with your knees bent and your feet evenly spaced apart to the more leaned-back position with your feet one behind the other.
I smile big, realizing I finally did it. Chase is whistling from behind me. My brother is standing up in the boat, pumping his fist in the air, and Haley is doing as told, recording my first time.
My first time, I think with a sigh, turning around to look at Chase.
Then, I fall on my ass.
Chase swims over to me, and I’m so happy that I toss my arms around his neck. “I did it! The trick was leaning back.”
“You need to do it again. Don’t turn around this time. Trust me, I’m watching.”
“Okay!”
The boat comes back, and Damon tosses me the rope. I get in position again, yell that I’m ready, and immediately pop up. I ski past the house and can see everyone out on the lawn and dock. Phillip signals to me that he’s turning the boat around to head back the other way.
As we get to the house, he points for me to drop off at the dock, so I swing way out, cross the wave fast, then toss the rope in the air, and ride the ski into the area in front of the dock, receiving cheers from the family.
I’m lying out on the dock by myself, getting sun and watching Haley wakeboard when Jadyn comes to sit next to me.
“So, you finally did it? You got up on one ski?”
“I did. Twice. The first time, with Chase’s help. The second time, more on my own.”
“That’s fantastic.” She pauses for a minute as Haley comes by again and does two flips in a row.
“Good to know all those tumbling lessons for cheer have paid off,” she jokes.
I push my sunglasses on top of my head. “You know, Auntie Jay, you never did finish your story.”
“You’re right. I didn’t. Sorry for ending it on such a bummer.”
“I’m sure talking about that night isn’t easy. I’m sure you don’t get over something like that.”
“No, but you can come to terms with it. So, we left off on the night they passed. And needless to say, after that, I was pretty much a wreck. When you are in a time of, let’s call it, an emotional crisis, you don’t think; you just do what you need to do to survive. You turn without thought to the person you need the most.
“That night, at the party, I kissed your dad and even thought I might lose my virginity to him. When the fight broke out and Phillip dragged me away, I was furious. I wanted the fight to be over, so I could, uh, explore things with your dad.”
I can’t help but laugh. “Explore … nice way of putting it.”
“The thing is, it worked out better that way. Phillip is the person who I needed to be with that night. From the hospital through the funeral, I clung to him. I felt like if I let go of his hand, the water would pull me under, and I’d drown. And I know it sort of hurt your dad’s feelings that it wasn’t his hand I was holding, but I was in survival mode.” She turns and looks at me closely. “Kind of like when your parents are going through a divorce and you sneak over to your best friend’s room.”
“I know my parents didn’t die, but what happened was such a shock and changed my life. I mean, looking back, I see now that it was for the best. My parents are happier. But at the time …”
“It was rough. I know. I want you to know something else. Something important. As little girls, we dream of our own Prince Charming, the guy who will sweep us off our feet and love us forever. When your parents get a divorce, it can sort of shatter that dream.”
“I’d say.”
“Don’t let it, Dani. Look at your dad now. He has his happily ever after. It just took him a little longer to get it. And he wouldn’t have changed anything because he has you and Damon.”
I nod in understanding. “So, Phillip was your rock, but you kissed my dad again after that night?”
“A few days later, at the funeral reception held at Phillip’s house, Danny and Phillip told me that my parents would want me to go to prom. Which was the absolute last place I wanted to go.”
“Especially since your date—” I start.
“Brought another girl to the party, right? I was brokenhearted all the way around. But your dad offered to take me to the dance. Phillip would have done it, but he already had a date. They talked me into going even though it felt disrespectful. Your dad kissed me and then went back to Lincoln. After everyone else left, I went back to my house and lost it. Finally cried all the tears I’d been holding in, trying to be strong. And Phillip was there. He held me and soothed me. And the only place I could fall asleep for months after that was on his shoulder.”
“That’s really sweet,” I say, my thoughts wandering back to waking up on a certain boy’s chest this morning.
“Fast-forward a week. It was prom night. I was all dressed up, had a limo, and my date was the hottest guy in town.”
“Wait. My dad was the hottest guy in town?”
“Your dad is still one of the hottest guys in town,” she says with a laugh.
I shake my head as her eyes flit toward the lake, where Phillip is now out on a wakeboard, a pair of swim trunks slung low on his hips, wearing them just like Chase does. And I know that she’s looking at who she thinks is one of the other hottest guys in town.
“Keep in mind, my parents had just died. I was a mess but pretending not to be, and I was only going to prom because everyone thought I should. There was a party at the hotel after, and I had a room booked.”
My mind drifts back to Chase’s hands on my ass out in the water today, but when she mentions a room—
“A room for you and my dad?”
“Yep. And although it never crossed my mind at the time, can you imagine how your dad felt? He knew if we did, it would be my first time. He knew I shouldn’t make a decision like that in my mental state, but I was going for it. Phillip had suggested I do it with a friend.”
“So, you decided to seduce my dad?” I put my hand over my mouth in pretend shock. I already know they didn’t have sex. My mom often refers to Jadyn as the only girl my father hasn’t slept with.
“Had the slinky lingerie and everything. We kissed a lot that night. And your dad drank. A lot.” She shakes her head and chuckles. “Of course, I know now that he was drinking because he was torn about what to do. Any other girl—”
“But you weren’t any other girl, were you? And you’d held Phillip’s hand at the funeral, not his.”
“Exactly.”
“So, what happened?”
She glances up, making sure no one is around. “I probably shouldn’t be telling you this.”
“Come on. You can’t stop now.”
“Fine. We got to the hotel, made out on the bed, had some champagne. The scene was set. I went in the bathroom to put on something more comfortable. What I did in reality was spend a fair amount of time brushing my teeth, fixing my makeup, looking at myself in the mirror, and majorly freaking out. When I finally got my nerve up, I opened the door and stepped out into the room in all my I’m going to have sex tonight lingerie glory. Your dad’s tux was hung up, and he was lying across the bed, his back to me, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers. There was a condom package on the nightstand. I thought, This is it.”
I let out a heavy sigh. I totally get how she felt. How nervous she was. How she wanted to but …
“Only then, I discovered that the reason his back was to me was because he’d puked in the trash can and he was now passed out. And snoring.”
I start giggling. And I can’t stop. “Oh my gosh,” I say, still laughing. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to laugh. What did you do? Did you cry? Were you upset? Mad at Dad? Did you wake him up?”
“I remember looking down at myself and thinking, Screw it. If I’m not going to get laid, then I’m going to get drunk. So, I took off the stupid lingerie, shoved it back in my bag, got dressed, and decided to go to the party.
“Out in the hallway, I saw Phillip, alone. He had a date, but I guess after she threw up in the bathroom all night at the dance, he was over it and took her home. I asked him if he wanted to go to the party, and he said he had a better idea. He had also rented a suite, and it had a hot tub, like the party room did. We ended up in it, talking. I put my head on his shoulder and fell asleep. At some point, he woke me up, and I told him I was sleeping there because my room smelled like puke. We crashed until about four in the morning when your dad showed up, looking for me. He saw me in bed with Phillip, wanted to join us since our room smelled, and gave me some line about a threesome. I sat up in bed and said that I was game.”
My eyes get huge. “You did?”
“I knew he wasn’t serious, so I called him on it. Said we’d start with the two of them kissing each other.”
“You told my dad to kiss Uncle Phillip? Ohmigod.” I laugh. And laugh some more.
And I totally get why the three of them have been friends for so long. Not only does Jadyn not put up with their shit, but she also calls them on it.
“Right? I knew he wasn’t serious. But then he decided he was too tired for that, and we all just crashed on the bed. Back at home the next day though, your dad told me that he didn’t want us to date. He showed me the picture of Phillip and me going up for a pass—”
“The one where you are in that flag bikini? The perfect pass, right?”
“You know the story?” she asks, tilting her head in surprise.
“Yeah, Dad told me and Chase about it last fall. I always wondered why he had a picture of you in a bikini, hanging on our wall. But he told us how he struggled mentally in his game freshman year. That his coach told him to think of a time when he had thrown the perfect pass. That picture he thought of was the three of you playing catch, when it was just for fun.”
“That day was the first time he showed me the picture. He told me about what it meant to him. How he didn’t want to ruin the picture, ruin his game, or ruin us.”
“Do you think it would have ruined your friendship?” I ask seriously because I wonder this all the time about Chase and me.
“No, I don’t. But he wasn’t really referring to me in that picture.”
I tilt my head to the side, trying to understand. “But it was only you and Uncle Phillip—wait, was he afraid if he dated you, it would ruin his friendship with Uncle Phillip?”
“I didn’t know it then, but yes. Fast-forward to the end of my senior year in college. Phillip kissed me and told me we should be together. We agreed to have a trial run during our trip to Cancun for your parents’ wedding, and if it didn’t work, we’d pretend it never happened and go back to just being friends. It’d been years since your dad spoke of ruining us, but his words stuck, and I was so afraid that I’d ruin things with Phillip and lose him forever. And he was my everything, you know,” she says.
I notice her breathing more heavily. Her chest heaving. And I can feel her pain. Her confusion coming through, even today.
“I couldn’t risk it.”
“He was your everything, but you weren’t dating?” I ask.
“Yes. I was the girl in his life. Always. And every girl he dated knew it, which was why nothing ever worked. We were self-sabotaging ourselves. As in typical young Jadyn fashion, when things got rough, I got drunk. Phillip was mad at me. The morning of the wedding, I was hungover. Your dad took me to breakfast, and I spilled my guts about what had happened and how scared I was.
“That’s when he told me that he didn’t tell me the whole truth that day. That the next morning, instead of me being tangled up with him—my date—I had been wrapped in Phillip’s arms, my head snuggled into his chest. He said he always knew Phillip and I had a special bond, something he’d never been a part of, but it had never been so clear to him until that moment. And although he didn’t say it, I knew it was actually Phillip he didn’t want to ruin his relationship with. They’re like brothers.”
“Why was Uncle Phillip mad at you?”
“I was dancing with him but also dancing with some other guys. Just in a big group. He accused me of pushing him away. Of not trying to make our relationship work. I accused him of not wanting to have any fun. He told me he was done trying. That if anything was ever going to happen between us, it was up to me. He left me sobbing on the beach.”
“Really? All alone? And drunk? I can’t see him doing that.”
“He couldn’t, I guess, because at some point, he carried me to my hotel room and put me to bed. At the wedding, he barely spoke to me. I knew that I had ruined everything. Which was sad because I really did love him.”
“Wait. So then, what happened? How did you get together?”
“When we got back, he pretended like it’d never happened. Our relationship was strained but still intact. Phillip started dating someone else. The summer flew by. Then, it was time for our annual Nebraska football kick-off party at Phillip’s house.”
“And what about you? Were you dating anyone?”
“I was having a summer fling with a guy in a band, who broke up with me because I’d chosen to go prep for the party with Phillip instead of go to some last-minute band gig thing with him. He went on and on about Phillip being perfect and gave me an ultimatum. Him or Phillip.”
“What did you do?” I laugh. “Well, obviously, you chose Uncle Phillip at some point, but in that moment, what did you say to that guy?”
“I was pissed about what he was suggesting. So, I said that if he really expected me to choose him over someone I’d known my whole life, the choice was easy. I told him good-bye. He stormed out. I knew I was in love with Phillip. Even your dad was getting sick of my indecision. So, I went over to his house. Found out that his parents were leaving that night, taking the RV down to the game, and his mom had already prepped all the food for the party.”
I grin. “Ohhh. Meaning you had the house to yourselves with nothing to do?”
“Basically. Keep in mind though, the Mackenzies and the Diamonds became my family after my parents died. Mrs. Mac sat me down in the kitchen and gave me one of her mint brownies.”
“Ohmigosh. Those are my favorite,” I tell her.
“Me, too. And she knew it because then she told me in that sweet voice of hers that it was a bit of a problem because most of the girls Phillip dated were threatened by our relationship and that if things got serious with one of them, they’d have to respect her wishes. Which meant I would basically be kicked out of the family. And I don’t know what she puts in those brownies, but I admitted to her that I was in love with Phillip. She told me to act on it before I lost him and to not think of it as losing my friend, but gaining something so much better. And I guess by that point, I was so afraid of losing him that I was finally willing to risk it.”
“But you didn’t lose him.”
“No, I got something so much better.”
“I think Chase would like it if we dated,” I blurt out. Shit. Why did I say that?
“Chase cares a lot about you,” she states.
“I know. I just don’t know if I’m ready for him yet.”
She looks like she’s about to say something, but then the boat flies by, and Chase comes gliding toward the dock on a slalom ski, ending our conversation.
We have lunch, swim in the lake, play fetch with the pups, and have a quiet afternoon.
We’re lying on rafts, just floating in the water, when Haley says, “I suppose I should go get ready for tonight.”
“What’s tonight?” I ask.
Chase lets out a sigh and rolls his eyes at me.
“Let me guess … it’s on the freaking board?” I say.
“Every Sunday night, the parents, grandparents, and us four older kids are going out for dinner,” Haley explains. “The resort has a beautiful restaurant at the top of the hill that overlooks the lake, golf course, and resort. Dad is all excited because they have a wine bar, a whiskey room, and a large selection of cigars. Dinner is at seven, but we’re supposed to leave at six, so they can have wine first.”
“What are we going to do while they do that?”
“There’s other stuff up there,” my brother says. “You need to get out more. There’s a bunch of shops, a museum, and a mountaintop trail made for golf carts that is supposed to offer amazing views.”
“What are we supposed to wear tonight?” Haley yells out.
I figure her mother will reply, but she’s in the pool with Phillip with their lips locked over the top of baby Emersyn.
Instead, Mimi says, “It’s your one night to get gussied up while we’re here. That answer your question?”
“Yep,” Haley says and then mutters, “A dress it is. I’ll see y’all later.” She gets up and heads in the house.
I grab one of my braids and run a finger across it. I braided it when I was done skiing, and it’s dried. I take off the rubber band from the bottom, undo the braid, and then fluff up my hair.
“What do you think?” I ask Chase, swinging my hair in his direction. “Do I need to shower, or will this work?”
He smiles, slides closer to me, and undoes a piece that is still sticking together. “I don’t know how you do that,” he says.
“Do what?”
“Just unbraid it and have it look so perfect.”
“It looks perfect?” I ask.
“Yeah, it does.”
His hand is still lingering near my face, and he looks like he might kiss me, but there are a lot of people around, and we usually only kiss in private. And I wonder why.
“How come you only kiss me when we’re alone?”
“I feel like that’s a loaded question,” he says, running his hand through his hair from the crown of his head to the nape of his neck and just holding it there. “But it goes both ways, Dani. I think you should kiss me. Right now.”
“I can’t do that,” I say, my eyes getting big.
“But why not?”
I glance around and then bug my eyes out in emphasis. “Because our parents would see. Our grandparents would see.”
“So what? You used to kiss Matt in front of us all.”
“That’s different. He was my boyfriend.”
Chase’s face is so close to mine that his lips graze my cheek when he whispers, “Do you wanna kiss me?”
“I, uh—”
He leans back and holds my gaze. “Do you?”
“Fine. Yes, I do.”
“Then, make me your boyfriend.”
I let out a huff of air. “Chase, we can’t do that. It’s not just our friends who would freak out. Our parents would, too. They’d be planning the wedding.”
He rolls his eyes. Then, he puts his lips against his index finger, kisses it, and then presses it against my lips.
“I’ll be in the shower if you change your mind,” he says, leaving me sitting here, feeling like I should fan my face from the flames that just came off that boy.
I’m ready early, which is kind of a shocker, so I stop in Haley’s room to see how she’s doing.
“Which dress do you think?” she asks, holding up two, both of which are shades of pink.
“The fuchsia one. I like the cut and the little flounces at the bottom, and it will look killer with your tan.”
“Thank you. I couldn’t decide. Not that it matters that much, I guess, since I’ll wear the other one next week.
“Chase said there are some stores up there. Maybe we can shop while our dads smoke cigars.” She drops the robe off her shoulders, pulls the dress over her head, and then adds a pair of studded strappy sandals and a matching bag.
“Going all out?” I ask her, noting the designer bag. I didn’t even think to bring a purse. Just slipped the club card into my pocket in case I need it.
“Well, I’m supposed to meet Mikey after dinner,” she says as we make our way downstairs.
“Who’s that?”
“The brother of the hottie, who happens to be a hottie himself. They check out in the morning, so it’s their last night here.”
“Haley,” I say, the concern showing in my tone.
“I haven’t even kissed him yet. But I am hoping I’ll at least get a good-bye kiss. Maybe a nice little good-bye make-out session. Not planning to go all the way or anything. I also realized that I must not have liked Jeremy as much as I thought since I got over him the second I saw Mikey. Plus, he’s just so sweet. And, get this, he lives, like, two towns away from us, so it’s not like we couldn’t see each other if we wanted to.”
Jennifer and Jadyn are dressed and ready to go and have the babies on their laps when we get into the great room.
When Weston sees me, she holds her little hands toward me and babbles. I take her from Jennifer and snuggle her against my chest. I swear, she’s the most beautiful baby in the world.
“We’re waiting for the babysitter to arrive,” Jadyn tells us. “Haley, why don’t you go get the boys, so we’re ready to go when she gets here?”
Just as she turns around, Damon and Chase come in through the deck doors. Both are dressed up. My brother has got his bangs flipped over to the side, and he looks cute, wearing a white button-down and a pair of khaki shorts with loafers. Chase, on the other hand, does not look cute. He looks scorchingly hot.
His long bangs are pushed up in the kind of artful mess of hair that makes a girl want to run her hands through it.
Not me, of course, but possibly some girls.
His tall frame is encased in a black T-shirt that hangs in a way that only high-quality cotton can. Black shorts cover the important parts with a black belt and black shoes finishing the look.
I’ve never, ever, ever—wait, maybe once at Halloween when he was nine and decided to dress like a vampire—seen Chase in all black.
And it’s devastating.
He doesn’t look like my best friend anymore. He looks—dare I say—a little bit bad. Like he’s got an edge now.
And my goodness, is it working.
Fortunately, the doorbell rings, forcing me to turn away and not embarrass myself by drooling like my baby sister.
Damon and Chase sit on the couch next to me while Jennifer gets up to answer the door.
“Hotties are leaving in the morning,” I hear him whisper to Chase. “Last chance to score with them.” He holds out his fist and bumps Chase’s. “Then, a whole batch of new recruits will be checking in tomorrow. You know where we need to be. By. The. Pool. All. Day. Everyone goes to the pool while they wait for their room. We’ll make our move—” He stops speaking when a leggy brunette with a curvy figure enters the house. “Holy shit,” he says. “Remember this day, man. I just met my future wife.”
Jennifer greets her by saying, “Thanks so much for coming.” Then she turns to us. “Everyone say hello to Ainsley Archibald, Tripp’s niece who just finished her freshman year at Notre Dame.”
We all smile and wave in her direction.
“She’s smart, too,” Damon whispers.
“And you’re working here for the summer?” Jadyn says, rising to meet her as well.
“Yes, I’m a camp counselor for the kids program.”
“I think I need counseling,” Damon says under his breath.
“What’s your major?” Jennifer asks her.
“Well, it was engineering. Turns out, working with all those numbers isn’t really what I want to do. I decided I want to make the buildings pretty after someone else figures out how to build them.”
“She can make my building pretty, if you know what I mean,” Damon whispers.
“I’m going to K-State this fall. They have a good interior design school, and I’ll get to spend a semester studying in Italy.”
“That sounds like so much fun,” Jennifer gushes. Then, she turns to Jadyn and says, “Do you know that’s what she does? Well, sort of. She designs them and makes them pretty.”
“Yes, I’ve heard all about the Jadyn Mackenzie from Uncle Tripp. We were here for the big family reunion in May. You’d thought of every detail when you planned this place. Seriously, we were all in awe.”
“Well, thank you,” Jadyn says graciously.
“I need to go talk to her. Give me the baby,” Damon says to me.
“You’re not going to use our sister to try and get laid. Besides, that girl is going to be a sophomore in college. She’s nineteen.”
“And I’m fifteen. That’s only four years.”
“And right now, you’re jailbait,” I argue.
“So what? We’ll do our thing now, and when it doesn’t matter how old we are—”
“How old would that be?”
“Um, when I’m eighteen or nineteen probably. Or maybe I’ll wait until I get drafted. I’ll hire her to help me decorate my new house, specifically the bedroom, and she’ll fall for me.”
“By then, she’ll probably be with someone, if she isn’t already now,” I counter. Because she is quite striking.
He shakes his head and looks at me like I’m an idiot. “She isn’t already now because she just switched schools. Besides, once she meets me again then, it won’t matter who she’s with. She’ll dump them immediately for me.”
“You are confident,” Chase says with a grin.
But I don’t agree. “Damon, how can you say that? If Dad had done that with Jennifer when he and Mom were first married, you wouldn’t even be here.”
“Que fucking será, será. Whatever. You’re ruining my moment here.”
Jennifer and Jadyn are still giving the girl instructions when my dad and Phillip come in, closely followed by the grandparents and the dogs.
“I think I’m going to have to skip dinner,” Damon tells our dad.
Dad takes one look at him, then glances at the babysitter, and chuckles. “Sorry, son. She only signed up to babysit two babies, not three.”
“I could stay and help her. Because it would be a lot, watching two boys, two dogs, and two babies. Plus, I think I got too much sun today. I’m feeling a little woozy.”
“You probably need food,” I offer.
“Or to get laid.” Chase chuckles under his breath.
As the group leaves the house, Papa turns around, glancing back at the door, and says, “If I were a young man.”
“Thankfully for all of us, you’re not,” Mimi quips.
“You know,” Grandpa Mac says to Papa, “my lovely bride has been telling me since I fully retired that I need a keeper.” He turns to Grandma Mac and says, “Can I have one like that?”
“Only if I get a young buck for myself,” she fires back, which causes everyone to laugh.
“Love it,” Papa says, to which Mimi replies, “Oh, hush, you are all here with a group of fine-looking, confident women. And if you’re not careful, you’re going to piss them off, and your night won’t go at all the way you might have planned.”
Which manages to quiet the men’s laughter.
After we finally load up two by two in the golf carts and head out, I ask Chase, “Has my brother … you know?”
“You should ask him,” Chase says with a laugh.
“Why would I do that? I’m asking you.”
“Because he likes to talk about it. But be sure you have some time—it’s a long story.”
“Who was it? When was it?” And how did my little brother have sex before me?
“It was last summer. Maggie Duncan.”
“But she’s, like—”
“Older,” Chase says. “She hit on him at a party. It was just that one time.” He laughs again.
“And since then?”
“Molly and Jessie.”
“Huh.”
It’s a pretty long drive through the resort, around the lazy river, and then up to the top of the hill.
Phillip and Jadyn are the first in line to give their golf carts to the valet. It probably doesn’t hurt that they scream owner Tripp with their special red insignia, and when people here see it, they come running.
I watch as Phillip comes around to Jadyn’s side of the cart, takes her hand, and helps her out.
“Your parents are so cute,” I say to Chase. “They still seem so in love.”
“Your dad seems pretty in love, too.”
“I know, but he should be, right? It’s so new.”
Chase shrugs. “Maybe.”
Jadyn comes over and says to me and Chase and Damon and Haley, who are in the cart behind us, “We’re going to the wine and whiskey bar, and the guys want to smoke a cigar. Why don’t you take the carts on the scenic routes up here? You’ll love it. Take your time, and when you get back, we’ll head into the restaurant.”
“Sounds good, Mom,” Chase replies.
We go on the three-mile loop around the area, taking in the scenic views of the lake and beautiful rock structures. We stop often, comment on how pretty it is, and take a bunch of photos with the camera Chase brought.
Once back at the restaurant, we’re escorted to a table near the windows with an even more spectacular view.
And I’m not sure if someone—Jadyn probably—called ahead or what, but the second we sit down at the table, appetizers are brought out. There’s a huge charcuterie board along with spinach dip, crab cakes, shrimp cocktail, and—my favorite—maple-roasted bacon with truffle-infused grits, braised spinach, and a wine reduction sauce. Seriously dying.
Chase loves the bacon but hates the truffle part of it.
A waiter does ask me what entrée I want but lets us know that the soup and salad course as well as the sides will be served family-style.
I skip the salad and dig into a creamy potato chowder, flavored with pieces of pancetta and topped with toasted pumpkin seeds. Even though I feel the need to try every single thing on the table, I remember that I’m in a bikini every day and try to pace myself.
Truth is, I’m already full.
Chase and my brother, on the other hand, are just warming up.
I lean over toward Damon and whisper to him, “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you’ve been having sex!”
He rolls his eyes at me. “I haven’t been having sex. I wish. I’ve had sex. Big difference, sis.”
“Okay, whatever. But what I want to know is, why didn’t you tell me?”
He shrugs. “I guess I figured Chase had told you. You two tell each other everything.”
A plate is passed in front of his face with a remaining crab cake. He snatches it up and pops the whole thing in his mouth.
“He didn’t tell me.”
“Ah, that’s right. It was last summer,” he says after he stops chewing.
“And?”
“It was last summer,” he repeats.
I want to ask what he means by that, but my brown sugar–glazed salmon is placed in front of me as another waiter starts coming around with all the sides. There are fried fingerling potatoes, sweet potato fries with honey butter, homemade macaroni and cheese, creamed spinach with Parmesan cheese, and mashed potatoes. There are also sauces for all the main dishes—balsamic reduction, red-wine reduction, hollandaise sauce, and a gorgonzola sauce.
We eat for what feels like hours.
“I’m stuffed,” Damon says, leaning back in his chair.
“We’re all stuffed,” my dad says, looking much like my brother in this moment.
They share the same face and a similar build, but Damon got our mother’s eyes. I’m sort of the opposite. People say I favor my mother until I am next to my dad, and then they realize I look a lot like him, too. Mostly because of our eyes. While my brother’s are brown, like Mom’s, I got my dad’s brilliant blue ones. And with the strawberry-blonde shade I have my hair colored right now, they seem to pop even more than when I’m my natural dirty-blonde, like Dad’s. I’ve been considering going a really deep brown, but my mother has a fit every time I mention it, saying my skin tone won’t carry such a dark color.
She goes to the best colorist in the area—of course—and I’d be a fool not to use him, too, but he agrees with her. Probably because she tips better than me and is there for weekly touch-ups. Her hair is naturally strawberry blonde, but she’s gone almost platinum lately. Which, if you ask me, doesn’t really suit her skin tone, but I know when to keep my mouth shut.
When we’ve all dragged ourselves out of the restaurant, Damon and Haley tell our parents that they are headed to the resort to hang out with some friends.
I pull Damon aside.
“What?” he says.
“I know your plan for tonight, but you need to keep an eye on Haley.”
“Word,” is all he says before they hop in their golf cart and speed off down the hill.
I let out a sigh as I walk over to the balcony and look at the lake. Chase joins me. He doesn’t wrap his arms around me, like a boyfriend would do. Rather, he stands behind me and puts his hands on the railing, trapping me but not really touching me. It’s a weird thing. The boundaries we’ve set for each other.
“It’s pretty up here, but the mosquitoes are out in full force.”
I turn around and look up at him. “Why didn’t you tell me about my brother having sex?”
“Why is it such a big deal?”
“Because you didn’t tell me. We tell each other everything,” I say, feeling hurt. Because he’s supposed to be my best friend.
“We used to. But we don’t anymore. We’re growing apart.”
“Don’t say that!” I practically yell.
“Well, it’s true. You’re dating other guys. I’m not cool enough to be your friend, let alone your boyfriend.”
“Chase, you’re the coolest and sweetest guy I know.”
He backs away from me, his arms leaving my sides, making me feel alone in the world.
“A lot of good that does me,” he says, shaking his head. “I’m going down to the resort. Check on Haley.” He tosses me a set of keys. “You can have the cart.”
Then, he walks away.
I consider following him, but I don’t. Because things with Chase are complicated right now. Add to that the discussion I had with his mom today, and I’m feeling all kinds of confused.
I want him. But I don’t.
I think I might want to marry him someday, but someday seems so far away. But I’m young.
We’re young. He’s young.
Right now, the only thing I know is that I love kissing him, and I wish it could be more.
And I don’t know if it’s Hunter’s rejection, teen hormones, or real love causing it.
Which means, I go back to the house, crawl into bed, and go to sleep, effectively avoiding trying to figure out the answer.