Synonym

"Open!" I grunted while holding my stick up. Coach decided to skip conditioning today and go straight to scrimmages. Since the team was down a player and a goalie, two coordinators filled the spots for full field scrimmages. No surprise that defense was the position missing a player. Perks of an 18 person team when there's 10 people per team on the field.

In all honesty, I never understood why defense was lacking. If anything, defense should have more subs than attack. If the goalie gets hurt, who is going to play his position? A defender who has had a little time in the goal. Not an attack player. That would be stupid. Who's more likely to get hurt? A person getting rammed by other players or someone running from other players? In my head, it was a no brainer.

The whole concept of substitutes had been on my mind a lot the past two weeks. Ever since the pregnancy, I started to wonder what would happen to the team if I was out. Midfielder and attack had three subs each, while defense had two. If I was gone, they had one. That put the team dangerously close to having to put a midi in defense. In the Olympics, that wouldn't be a good thing. This isn't a simple college switch; this is the real deal.

The only reason that it was a burning question, is because I expected the worst. If I had to have a Cesarian Section then I might not be able to compete as quickly as I would like. It was most likely not going to happen, but I could worry.

It was the beginning of November now. Finn and I avoided Halloween parties for the sake of Olympic training. It gave me an excuse not to drink without people getting suspicious. Soon we would venture home for Thanksgiving. By then we would be into the second trimester, making it a good opportunity to let our fathers in on the secret.

Finn was more worked up about that than I was. And to me, that made sense. My father might murder Finn on the spot. Dad was an understanding man, he even let Finn sleep in bed with me months before we started dating, but there was a line. Getting his 18 going on 19 year old daughter pregnant was definitely one of them.

Both of our birthdays were this week. Mine was tomorrow and Finn's three days later. Sadly, our schedules kind of messed up celebrations but we were free the night of Finn's so we were going to go on a nice date. It had been forever since we had done that. Between school, lacrosse, and friends our dates were more like trips to the supermarket.

I didn't exactly mind though. I was still spending time with him and that made me happy. One would think we would get bored of each other; spending literally only three hours apart a day especially this early into a relationship, but that didn't seem to happen. We still laughed at each others jokes, teased each other, avoided explosive fights, and more importantly, the spark was still there. I would have though it impossible for me to still get butterflies in my stomach a year later, but somehow he did it. Every time I was with Finn, it was like a first. I loved it.

The yellow ball came flying at my stick like Juan was trying to take my head off. The force of the ball shot down my stick and through my arms, that's how aggressive it was thrown. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes as I threw to ball to my forward right where Jason was standing in wait. Anthony didn't have time to change his angle to block the pass and Jason shot up the field to score.

That's one thing I was reliable for; backing the ball up to move it around. I was like the token defense player that actually acted like a midi instead of just trying to block. It doesn't matter how professional you are; most defensemen actually want to avoid having the ball for too long.

"Marquez! What the hell was that?!" Coach yelled from the side lines of the turf field. Juan had been off all day but it seemed he wasn't the only one. Malik and Anthony seemed to be having an episode too.

I think I was pushing myself to make an impression now more than ever. I need to make coach realize that I'm a valuable asset because once I announce my pregnancy, this could be over. He might just say, 'don't worry about it. You won't have time to get back in shape'.

I needed to prove that I was Aaron Rodgers and they were the Green Bay Packers. Together, it's fire but apart.... Green Bay, I love you; you're my ride or die NFL team, but you guys suck. Like suck ass.

I am Aaron Rodgers. I need to be. Or maybe like Lebron to Cleveland. Jeter to New York. Dwight to The Office.

The 'it' guy.

My dramatics aside, it was important to show that I was a valuable asset. I was trying to build all my muscle now so when I can't do this shit, I don't lose as much. I don't think that's how reality works, but it's how logic says it should and that's good enough for me.

Finn was looking on point lately too. Not more than usual, but he was consistent. Consistency was very very good in sports. Consistent players improved better because they could learn something and once they got it right, they almost always did it right.

I suppose Finn, Jason, and Rob and all them could be my backup. They could be the Jordy Nelson and Devante Adams to my Aaron Rodgers. I could allow that.

My new found aggression and drive didn't go unnoticed by my boyfriend. He was keeping a watchful eye on me from the corner of his vision. Finn's head was on a swivel, between the game and me. Once again; very cute but very annoying. He was just worried and I could understand that. I'm sure he was counting down the days until I couldn't play anymore.

Not because he wanted to hinder my performance, he was hoping I would recover faster than light. Finn just wanted the baby and I to be safe. His paranoid little brain might be worse then mine. That was quite the feat.