SWNOVELS Sweet Regret: Chapter 3
Needing a moment to process the last ten minutes, I purposely blend into the shadows against the wall.
It’s going to be okay.
Vince will be in Los Angeles for a while. He’ll do his thing. He’ll leave and then go back to wherever he lives now.
Plain. Simple. No need to intermingle our lives again. Problem solved.
I think that yet when I look up, it’s clear that Vince has already charmed nearly everyone in this room. It’s impossible not to be drawn to him. There’s a charisma about him. A playfulness. An edge to him that draws you in and makes it impossible to look away.
And it doesn’t hurt he’s more than easy on the eyes.
During the next thirty minutes, I busy myself with anything and everything that is as far away from him as possible. I’ve never been more willing to do the meaningless tasks Kevin requests than I am right now. Fresh coffee. A message delivered to the AD. A dictated task list typed up on my phone for him. But like everybody else in the room, when Vince takes the mock stage and begins to sing to the camera, all tasks are forgotten. I stop. I take one step toward the stage, then another, and fall under the trance of his voice.
Soft heart. Sharp knife.
This love of ours has ruined me for life.
Harsh words. Punched walls.
This pain is raw but fuck was it worth the fall.
Broken dreams. Scar lines.
You’ll always own this heart of mine.
For a moment, I let myself believe he’s singing to me. I allow myself the fleeting fantasy that this had all played out differently.
But only for a second.
Only so I can remind myself why it didn’t.
And when I blink away the tears that have welled in my eyes, Vince has his hands shielding his eyes from the lights, and he’s looking straight at me.
There’s no way he can see me where I’m blending in with the darkness of the room.
There’s no way he could know . . .
“Matthews.”
I jolt from my trance at the sound of Xavier’s voice, and I’m instantly on alert. No doubt he’s coming to give me a lecture over earlier. Or fire me. I’ve seen him fire people for less. It just depends on the mood he’s in.
Let’s hope he’s in a good one.
“Yes, sir?” I ask with cheer I don’t feel infused in my tone.
“What’s the deal with you and Jennings?”
“There’s no deal, sir.”
“Humor me with the fact that I wasn’t born yesterday. Clearly you know each other. Do I need to worry about anything here?” His eyes bore into mine demanding answers I’m not exactly comfortable giving.
“We went to high school together.” While it’s true, it’s just not the whole truth.
“So you do know him?”
“I knew him, yes, but haven’t seen him in years.”
Xavier chews the inside of his cheek as he stares at me with narrowed eyes and arms crossed over his chest. “He’s yours.”
“What do you mean he’s mine?”
“I’ve heard good stuff about your work. Your attitude. Your rapport with the talent. Our client list is overflowing, and while I’m thrilled to have Jennings on board after years of pursuit, it was all a little unexpected.”
“Congratulations.” It’s a lame comment, but it’s all I can think to say because I’m dreading what I think he’s going to say next.
“Congratulations indeed. He’s a great asset. A little unpredictable. A lot unscripted. Everything we as fans would hope for in a rock star, right?” He glances over his shoulder to where laughter rings out over something on set. “And that’s why I think it’s best I assign you to him.”
“Assign me to him?”
“I didn’t stutter, did I?”
“No. It’s just—”
“You’re going to turn down the opportunity every person in your position in this company would kill to have?”
“I didn’t say that.” I swallow over the lump in my throat.
“Good. I wasn’t asking you if you wanted this. I was telling you.” His smile is quick and unforgiving. “I’m under no pretenses that he’s going to be an easy client for us, but I think your familiarity with him will serve us both well. Thoughts?”
I shake my head because Xavier doesn’t want my thoughts. He just wants to hear himself talk and that’s fine with me because my head is spinning from the events of the past two hours.
Seeing Vince again.
Getting the opportunity I’ve hoped for.
Just my luck that I get my first real break in this job—that the Xavier McMann has actually noticed me—and he rewards me with an opportunity like this. He rewards me with Vince. The irony is so rich it’s not even worth summoning the laughter.
“Perfect. I’ll make sure that Kevin gets with you soon on what I expect.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Regardless of the situation, it’s your job to let the client think he’s always right even when he isn’t.”
“Mm-hmm.”
“And it’s my name you’re representing. I expect professionalism at all times. This newfound position is temporary unless you show me otherwise.”
“Thank you. I . . .” But he walks off, answering his ringing phone before I can say anything else.
I stare after him for a beat, my adrenaline pumping and my head swimming with a myriad of emotions. Excitement. Confusion. Caution. Trepidation. Optimism. Worry.
It shouldn’t be possible to feel all those things at once, but I do.
I can do this. Easy. I’m just an old friend, remember? Keeping my professional life separate from my personal life is something I do every day.
There shouldn’t be a difference now.
The director yells action and music engulfs the sound stage once again. The bruising melody of the ballad hits my ears. Another take of words that strikes a little too close to home.
Did you know? Did you care?
I looked up to find you weren’t there.
Kid gloves. Holding tight.
I still reach for you in the dark of night.
Shattered hopes. Love undefined.
You’ve always owned this heart of mine.
Yeah, it should be easy . . . if I don’t listen to his lyrics.