SWNOVELS Splintered Ice: Chapter 4
“What’s going on with you, man?” Vaughn asks me as I sit on the couch, staring at the black screen on the TV. We came back from practice instead of going out with some of the other guys and I’ve literally been sitting here since. Simon jumped in the shower and Vaughn disappeared into the other room before coming back in to find me like this. I haven’t moved or made an attempt to grab the remote. “You’ve been weird as shit this past week.”
I turn my head to look at him, feeling partially like a zombie. “I’m good. Just have a lot of shit on my mind.”
Vaughn walks over to the couch with a bottle of water in his hand as he sits down on the other side of the sectional. “If it has anything to do with me moving in, I can get my own place. I know that you and Simon are pretty close, so I’m kind of like the third wheel being here.”
“Nah.” I shake my head dismissively. “It has nothing to do with that. You’re practically family now since you are a part of our team. And you aren’t a douchebag, at least that I’ve seen so far.”
“So, what’s really going on then?” Simon’s voice breaks through as he walks into the room. I didn’t even realize that he was done in the shower, but now he’s in the living room with Vaughn and me.
Simon and I have been close since freshman year. He’s always been more of an open book than I am. I’m usually not the one who has any problems that need discussed, so it isn’t often that I need to let anyone in. Whether they’re friends or family. Stella is really the only one who I talk to about shit and she’s the last fucking person that I can go to about what’s going on right now.
“Just some shit with my sister…” Sister’s best friend.
Simon tilts his head to the side. He met Stella a few times when she came to stay with us. He’s seen the party animal side of her and how she can get a little out of hand. I’ve talked to him before about how she’s always been. “Is she getting into trouble in California?”
“No, she’s good. Just some other shit.”
He nods, finally picking up on my cues to let it go. That’s one thing that Simon is good for. He knows when to stop pushing and just let it be. I’ll figure it out on my own and don’t need someone else to help me figure out my problems.
Honestly, this isn’t even really a problem. It’s just me getting inside my own head. If I can keep my distance from Olivia, then I don’t have to worry about her clouding my thoughts like this. The more distance, the better. Why can’t I just go back to fucking looking at her like she’s my little sister’s best friend instead of the woman she’s grown into?
What the fuck is wrong with me?
“Okay, so if we’re not going to talk about your sister, can we at least turn on the TV?” Vaughn widens his eyes, a chuckle escaping him. “I mean, let’s be real. We’re sitting here in silence and you’re staring at the screen like there’s something on there to look at.”
A grin forms on my lips and I lean forward, grabbing the remote before throwing it at him. “Fuck off,” I grumble, rolling my eyes as I rise to my feet. “I’m gonna get a shower anyways.”
“That’s probably for the best. I don’t know how you’ve been sitting out here still smelling your stink from practice earlier.”
I shrug. “We spend a lot of hours smelling like gross hockey equipment.”
Vaughn scrunches up his nose. “Still doesn’t make it any better.”
Turning my back to him, I hear the TV click on as I head toward the staircase that leads upstairs. I head up into my room and grab a change of clothes before heading into the bathroom. I lock the door behind me before turning on the water and stripping out of the shorts and shirt I put on after practice.
This week has been a weird one. I haven’t felt right after that night at the diner with Olivia. She asks too many questions and I can’t stand it—mainly because I can’t give her the answers she wants. They’re the ones that I’m forced to keep to myself.
I know she wasn’t fond of knowing that Hannah was someone I sleep with occasionally. And Hannah was practically marking her territory because the threat was there. Part of me felt like an idiot for not making her stop, but the logical part of my brain knew it was what had to be done.
Hannah is a girl that I can be involved with. She’s not looking for anything more. There aren’t any complications or any outside forces that could ruin it all. It’s easy and simple. Olivia is complicated and I don’t need that in my life. I’m so close to reaching my dream that I can’t afford to lose focus now.
The NHL is literally just one step away. I’ve worked too hard for too long to risk jeopardizing any of that. Not that Olivia would jeopardize that, but she could fuck up a lot of things in my life. I don’t know why I’m even having thoughts like this. So, what if she grew up to be a fucking bombshell? Why can’t I just let my brain appreciate the way she looks and stop thinking about the fact that I know the real Olivia Davis.
I can’t like her; I can’t look at her like this now. Back then, it was different because I knew that nothing could happen between us. But now… now could be so different. Except it can’t. I can’t go there with her and I most definitely cannot develop any feelings for her.
Goddammit.
My phone buzzes from the pocket of my shorts on the floor. I pick it up and unlock the screen as I check my messages. It’s one from Hannah and she wants to hang out since I blew her off the other night. I stare at my phone for a moment, contemplating the distraction. I could respond and she would be over here before I even get out of the shower.
A sigh slips from my lips and I lock my screen, not answering her before I set my phone down on the counter. While I had dinner with Olivia last week, I made plans with Hannah while we were at the diner. I dropped Olivia back off at her dorm and I just couldn’t bring myself to hang out with Hannah afterward.
I don’t know what the hell was wrong with me, but I completely blew her off. I’ve successfully been able to avoid her since then. She sent me some unsavory text messages that evening, but I haven’t heard from her since. And now here she is again, offering a distraction from the shit going on in my head right now.
Stepping into the shower, the hot water burns my skin as it rolls down my back. It’s like a full-body cleanse as I walk in until it’s pouring down over my head, streaming down my face. I close my eyes, inhaling deeply, feeling the droplets of water hanging heavily in the steam that surrounds me.
Grabbing the shampoo, I scrub the sweat from my hair before running it back under the water. As good as it feels, as refreshed as it’s making me, it still isn’t helping with the thoughts that linger in the darkest places of my mind.
I keep finding myself drifting back to Olivia and how badly I wish that I could have taken her home instead of making plans with Hannah.
My cock throbs and I’m as hard as a rock as I entertain the thoughts in my mind. She’s so sweet, so innocent. Like a petite slice of heaven, wrapped in a ray of sunshine. I’d be willing to bet that no one has ever touched Olivia. And I swear to God if I find out that anyone did, I will gladly remove his hands from his body.
I know that I will never get the chance to touch her, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t fantasize about it. The way that her perfectly taut body would be positioned under mine. My name falling from her lips as I slide inside of her. Those plump fucking lips that I want to slide my tongue between.
If only I could just kiss her, to feel how soft her mouth is against mine. And I imagine her tasting as sweet as she is.
Somewhere while the thoughts drifted into my mind, my hand found my cock. Glancing down, I see that I’m subconsciously stroking it to the thought of Olivia taking it deep inside her. Leaning forward in the water, it streams down my face as I plant my other hand against the shower wall and begin to stroke the length of my erection.
Olivia fucking Davis. The girl of my dreams since high school. And the one that I’ll never be able to touch. Closing my eyes, I imagine her on her knees in front of me. It’s her hand wrapped around me instead of my own as she takes me into her mouth. She’s warm and wet and her tongue feels like fucking silk as it slides under my cock.
Jesus fucking Christ.
Sliding my hand into her hair, I grip her locks close to her scalp as she moves her head back and forth, stroking my length with her mouth. Her lips are tight around me and I’m already so fucking close. She pumps her hand faster, my hips beginning to buck as I thrust into her, and she moves her mouth along my cock.
My balls constrict, drawing closer to my body as the warmth begins to spread through my system. I can’t hold it in anymore. She fucks me with her mouth and I thrust into her once more before I’m coming. My orgasm tears through my body as I come fucking harder than I have in a long time. I’m still riding the high from my climax as I open my eyes and am brought back to reality.
Olivia isn’t on her knees in front of me. My hand is wrapped around my cock, slowly milking out the rest of my cum instead of her. And my cum is on the wall of the shower instead of in her mouth. A frustrated sigh slips from my lips as I release my dick. Curling my hand into a fist, I hammer it against the tiled wall of the shower, the water still streaming down my face.
I just jerked off in the shower, fantasizing about my little sister’s best friend.
Of course it was just a fantasy, but fuck me for wishing it were reality.