SWNOVELS Sinful: Chapter 6
I tossed and turned before I punched my pillow until I was breathless.
Whenever I tried to sleep, it failed me. All I could think about was the pain my angel had been in. The pain she was currently in.
Her silence always spoke volumes. I didn’t want her to be silent. I wanted my girl back. The one who was coming out of her shell and really starting to live.
The fear I had of her retreating into herself made me sick with worry. I just couldn’t let that happen again. It was an ugly place I had no desire to revisit.
I shuffled to my feet in nothing but my boxers and went upstairs to Church’s room. The door was cracked open, so I peered inside, expecting to find Church in bed with her, but she was the only one in it.
Carefully, I stepped inside the room, grateful he’d left his bedside lamp on. I assumed he was out hunting. It was just his way of relieving stress, and I couldn’t say shit about it. It was better than my way, which was beating on things or trying to kill myself to escape.
I slid into bed beside Sirena and stared at her while she slept.
Her pretty face was still slightly swollen and bruised. Beneath the new white nightgown Church had gotten her, I knew she had stitches and wounds littering her body. The motherfucker had cut her with his blade. If he’d have gone any deeper. . . I didn’t like thinking about it.
I exhaled and placed my hand over hers on her stomach.
“I love you, angel,” I whispered. “Don’t go, OK? Don’t leave us again. Stay, baby. Please. We need you here. I need you, Sirena.”
“I’m here,” she whispered back in the sweetest voice. “I’m not leaving.”
“Fuck, baby,” I choked out, tears springing to my eyes as I drank her in. “It’s so good to hear your voice.”
Her lashes fluttered for a moment before her colorful eyes appeared. I sat up on my elbow and stared down at her.
“Do you need anything? Pain meds? Water? Anything,” I said, both eager and desperate to please the pretty, broken angel in front of me.
“Help me,” she said in her soft voice.
“Tell me what you need.” I took her hand in mine and kissed her knuckles.
“Asylum. Mirage.” She licked her cracked lips. “S-Seth.”
I swallowed. “Do-do you want me to get Seth?”
Her eyelids drooped a little before she went silent.
“Angel?”
“Malachi,” she answered in that sweet, soft voice that sent butterflies flapping wildly through my guts and chest.
“I want you to feel better. What can I do?”
“Stay,” she said, her lashes fluttering until they closed completely. “Forever.”
“I’ll always stay, angel.” I scooted as close to her as I could get without disturbing her injured body. “I promise.”
A little smile touched her swollen lips.
Her breathing grew deeper until her small body relaxed, letting me know she was completely asleep again.
I lay beside her in the bed, studying her beauty. Even hurt, she was breathtaking.
Knowing she wanted to kill the one who hurt her should have upset me. It should have made me want to protect her from it all and do it for her, but if she were serious about it, I’d hold that prick down and let her gut him until she felt her vindication and got her satisfaction.
She deserved that.
I awoke in bed with just Church, our arms wrapped around each other like we’d been hugging in our sleep.
I blinked rapidly and looked at my watch. It was well into the afternoon. I tried to untangle myself from him, but he grunted and tugged me closer.
“Dante, man, stop,” I said, trying and failing again. “Sirena. She’s gone.”
His green eyes snapped open, confusion in them for just a moment, before he shoved me roughly, sending me toppling over the edge of the bed.
I hit the floor with a thud, cursing his name.
“Motherfucker, my tailbone,” I groaned, trying to right myself.
“Where’s Sirena?” He jumped out of bed and rushed around the room and into his bathroom before coming out.
I managed to get to my feet and dash to the door before he could. With him on my heels, we rushed downstairs.
I skidded to a halt when I saw Sirena lying on the couch, her head on Ashes’s lap, while cartoons played on the TV.
Ashes looked up at us and stopped raking his fingers through her hair for all of a moment.
“She came downstairs on her own,” he said. “You two must be hard to sleep with.”
Regret slammed into me. I’d fallen asleep beside her. Based on the way Church and I had woken, we were probably jostling her too much.
I took in her face. She was sleeping soundly.
Church moved past me and sat at her feet. He put them gently in his lap and covered them with a throw blanket.
Sighing, I shuffled into the kitchen and opened the fridge. My stomach gave a rumble, and I winced. I’d barely been eating again. Life had become far too stressful lately, but I was feeling it now.
“We’re out of nearly everything,” I said, closing the door. We didn’t even have milk to make cereal. Hell, we didn’t even have cereal.
“Snow is coming too,” Ashes called out. “Just saw it on the news. It’s supposed to hit late tomorrow. We’re usually stocked up by now for the winter months. We’re all going to be eating the things Church kills.”
“I doubt you’d want to eat all the things,” Church said.
I grunted. He was damn right about that.
“Well, we need to get some food brought in.” I went back to the living room and settled on the couch, taking in Sirena’s head on Ashes’s lap. My stomach growled again, and I crinkled my nose. I had to eat. Quickly, I pulled out my phone and put in an order for a couple of pizzas and breadsticks.
“Pizza?” Church called out.
I got to my feet. “Yeah. I’ll go meet them at the gates. By the time I get there, they should be near arrival.”
“Want me to go?” Ashes asked, his voice strained. I knew he was trying to be kind by offering, but didn’t really want to leave angel.
“Nah, man. I got it. I’ll be back soon.” I ran upstairs and dressed before coming back down and grabbing my jacket. I slid my feet into my boots, and headed out the front door.
The cold air bit at me as I put my head down and started the long walk to the gates. Snow was flurrying, and my breath came out in big white puffs.
I fucking hated the cold. I had no idea why I continued to live in it. I was of age. Leaving was an option after I finished my time at Chapel Crest. I’d spent my entire life thinking this was as good as it was ever going to get, but now that we had Sirena, I dreamed of more.
And more was someplace warmer than fucking Northern Michigan with the snow up to my fucking asshole.
When I reached the gates, I stood there, my hands stuffed in my jacket pockets, and my head ducked low. The wind was beginning to blow. The snow, which had already accumulated on the ground, was whipping across the main paved path as it wound its way through campus. Small drifts were forming.
The only good thing about this upcoming weather was that classes were typically canceled.
Didn’t need any psychos getting frozen to death on their way to their classes. That would just be fewer bodies for Sully and Everett to play with.
On the other hand, knowing what I knew about Everett, he’d probably love it just as much.
I breathed out and closed my eyes, an ugly image in my head of me on my knees and crying softly for my mother as someone’s warm body brushed against mine from behind. Warm lips. Tongue. The heat on my cock.
I swallowed hard, biting back the scream threatening to erupt from my mouth. More than anything, I wanted to smash these ugly memories into a million pieces so I couldn’t discern what they even were anymore.
But I couldn’t so far. I’d been trying. God help me. So much.
I didn’t want to be weak. I didn’t want to be some sick fuck’s plaything.
It’s what I’d been. It’s what I was.
I wiped hastily at a tear that slipped down my cheek, not wanting it to freeze to my face.
I’d been trying so hard to move past it all. Being strong right now for my angel was what mattered.
“Hey,” Sin called out, jolting me from my painful thoughts which had wandered back to my closet and the rope I’d put beneath my bed.
“Hey.” I stared as he walked toward me with Asylum, who was too busy looking down at his phone to say anything to me. Seeing the pair together was still odd to me. They seemed inseparable these days, though. I was glad Sin had someone to talk to. If they talked. I assumed Asylum probably just drove him nuts like he did to us.
They stopped in front of me. Sin’s hair was shorter. I’d noticed it before. It looked good on him. All shaggy. He was also thinner, with dark circles rimming his gray eyes.
A surge of sorrow swept through me. The pang of missing him hit me full force as we locked eyes. I shoved that feeling away too.
“How’s Siren?” he asked, his voice low.
“I think better. She isn’t locked inside her head like she was. . . before.”
He visibly swallowed and looked away from me as he shuffled the snow at his feet.
“I’m glad,” he finally said, looking back at me. “I-I worry.”
“I know.” I gave him a sad smile. It was good to know he was acknowledging those feelings. While Church was still pissed, I knew Sin might be able to redeem himself. Hopefully. I prayed he did because I missed his grouchy ass. Life just wasn’t the same without him. It was hard putting the past where it belonged. It was a task I’d been trying to work on.
“Malachi. Wolfy.” Asylum grinned at me. “Dinner?”
“Yeah, we’re almost out of food.”
“What? Why?” The concern in Sin’s voice had me glancing over at him.
I shrugged. “I guess we’ve just been busy with everything lately.”
Sin frowned at me. “You guys need to be stocked up. You can’t rely on this shithole.”
“Don’t you?” I looked to Asylum, who winked at me.
“I always have a little something tucked away for when times get tough,” he said.
I didn’t inquire further because my delivery arrived. Apparently, they were getting food too. I took our order and turned away from the pair, ready to get back inside and see Sirena.
“Stitches,” Sin called out to me.
“Yeah?” I stopped and turned to him.
He gave me a sad smile. “Can-will you tell the guys. . .”
“What?” I prompted, shivering.
“Nothing. Maybe I can tell them sometime.”
“Yeah. Maybe.” I gave him a smile which he returned, hope in his gray eyes.
“Always a pleasure, Malachi,” Asylum said, opening their breadsticks and taking a bite.
I rolled my eyes at him. “See you guys.”
I began my trek and looked over my shoulder to see they were headed into the woods with their food.
I frowned, wondering what the hell they were up to.
Making it a point to mention it to the guys, I picked up my pace and went home, eager to see my family.
What was left of it anyway.