SWNOVELS Sinful: Chapter 10
I stared into the flames dancing in the fireplace in our living room. We didn’t often light this thing up, but Ashes had it roaring when Stitches and I had come back from getting winter supplies. We’d hauled it all into the house, having spent several thousand dollars on it all. Winters here could be brutal. It was probably one of the reasons why Chapel Crest was situated where it was. Students weren’t able to escape more than half the year. Made life easier for the people in charge.
Because of the dancing flames, I knew Ashes was struggling with something. He kept pacing the room, flipping his lighter open and closed. Clearly, he was trying to gather his thoughts. I watched the flames, worry unfurling in my guts. Stitches simply sat on the other end of the leather wrap-around, looking to the ceiling. Ashes said Sirena had been sleeping for hours now.
That was good. She needed the rest.
But seeing Ashes pace the way he was made me think we had a new issue to tackle.
Like we needed any fucking more issues.
“Shit got weird today,” Ashes finally said, stopping and letting out a shaky breath.
“How so?” I looked over at him, taking in the way his Adam’s apple bobbed when he swallowed and the way his blue eyes wavered.
“Sirena. I took her to shower. She didn’t want me to look at her. I get it. I do. That wasn’t the problem. I turned my back on her and let her get inside the shower. Everything was going fine. Then she got out and walked past me completely naked and soaking wet. She didn’t respond to me calling for her. I didn’t know what the fuck was happening.” He breathed out.
“She doesn’t talk or respond much anyway, if at all,” Stitches said, frowning. “So what was weird about any of it?”
“She walked out like she was in a trance. She went straight to the front door and pulled it open. I managed to get to her the moment she made to step outside.” His blue eyes widened. “Her eyes. She wasn’t there. It wasn’t until I got her back to the couch that she started to come out of it.”
I rubbed my eyes, my frustration coming through. “I’ll call Doc. See what he says. She was sleeping peacefully when I was up there.”
“Maybe it’s her meds,” Stitches added, a note of hope in his voice. I knew what he was thinking, though. He was praying she wasn’t losing her damn mind.
“Trauma does fucked-up shit to people,” I continued. “Maybe that’s all this is. We’ll watch her. If it happens again, we’ll figure it out. We always figure it out.”
Ashes let out a sigh. “It was just weird, man. She was fine afterward. Pretty much just went to sleep.”
“We’ll watch her,” I repeated.
We fell silent for a long time. The knock at the front door had us on our feet. It was rare that anyone came to our house without an invitation, and I knew damn well I hadn’t invited anyone.
“Maybe it’s Cady?” Stitches wrinkled his nose and awkwardly adjusted his dick in his pants. He’d mentioned she threatened to feed him his own cock if she didn’t get to see Sirena. Obviously, the threat meant something to him as he made a move to protect himself.
I went to the door and pulled it open to find Sin holding two paper sacks of groceries.
“What’s this?” I asked, frowning at him.
“I, uh, I saw Stitches at the gates. He said you guys didn’t have much food. I thought I’d bring you some. It’s not a lot—”
“We don’t want it,” I snapped, glaring at him. “Keep it.”
“Church, I-I don’t want Sirena to be without if something happens. Storms are coming—”
“I know how to take care of my girl,” I snarled at him. “Don’t come to my fucking door and insult me, Sinclair.”
“What’s going on?” Stitches came up behind me and stared Sin down. “Hey.”
“I brought supplies,” Sin muttered.
“Shove them up your ass.” I slammed the door closed on him, anger coursing through me.
“Man, he’s trying,” Stitches said, sighing.
“Doesn’t fucking matter. He fucked up. He can’t unfuck what he did. Our girl up there losing her fucking mind and hurting is a reminder of that fuck-up.”
“He’s our friend. Our brother. At least he was. Let’s just—”
“No. I’ll fucking kill him if he steps foot into this house, Malachi. You know I will. Then I’ll eat all fucking winter.” I stormed upstairs and went straight to my room to find Ashes sitting on the edge of my bed, watching Sirena sleep.
“Who was at the door?” he asked, glancing at me.
It was hard for me to keep my anger in check whenever I was around Sin. He’d been one of my best friends. We’d bonded in our traumas, but that fucking asshole went a step too far.
“Sin.”
He raised his brows at me. “What did he want?”
“He had supplies he wanted to give us.”
“Oh. That’s nice of him.” He flipped his lighter open and closed, his attention back on Sirena.
“Fuck him,” I said, sitting on Sirena’s other side.
The flame from Ashes’s lighter danced for a moment before he closed the lid and returned to his ritual opening and closing five times. A pause. A flame. Back to opening and closing.
“Maybe we should talk to him and hear him out,” Ashes started.
“No. I already told Stitches that Sin can fuck off. He’s not welcome in this house. He helped for a minute when Specter was hurt. I appreciate that, but it doesn’t erase his sins. What he did fucked everything up.”
“Dante, we agreed to let Asylum in here. To help. To. . . I don’t know. I think maybe we should hear Sin out.”
I ground my teeth together. “Asher, man. Enough. I’m already on edge with everything. It takes every ounce of control I have to not just gut him whenever he’s close. The fact you and Stitches are so careless with your forgiveness baffles me.”
Ashes sighed and looked back to Sirena. “You know Sinclair has issues. We all do. Would you cut me out for mine? For setting the house on fire? What about Stitches for fighting? For his anger? I mean. . . fuck, man. We all deserve a little grace.”
“He meant for her to die, Asher. Dead. He hoped Asylum’s crazy ass would take her out.”
“And yet you’re letting Asylum in.” He looked back to me. “Do you get my point?”
I let out a huff of frustration. This conversation was going in circles and pissing me off.
“Let’s put a pin in it,” Ashes said, clearly catching on. He closed his lighter and clenched it tightly in his hand. I noted the slight tremble. “We can revisit this conversation later. However, you need to understand that Asylum and Sin have obviously become friends. If you’re letting Asylum near, know that Sin will be too. You can’t be pissed about that.”
I said nothing, knowing he was right. Knowing that it wouldn’t matter. Knowing at some point, I’d lose it on Sin again because he’d had a hand in the pain my specter was in. Knowing that he was responsible for. . .
Fuck.
For the way I felt. The pain and betrayal he’d inflicted on me.
I hated to admit it, but the grumpy fucker had broken my heart. After all the shit we’d been through together with Bells.
Bonded together in blood, death, and dark secrets.
And he’d fucking betrayed me.
I let out a sigh and sat on Sirena’s other side, then stared down at her.
“I love you, specter,” I murmured before placing a kiss on her forehead.
She let out a little hum in her sleep, and I looked to Ashes.
“Even in sleep, she hums that damn song,” he said softly. “I wonder where she heard it and why it’s so important to her.”
“Me too,” I said before twining my fingers with hers and clinging to her small hand.
In the end, it didn’t matter. As long as she was happy and still here, it was what I’d focus on.
And fucking keeping her that way.