Shattered Souls (Guardians of the Maiden Book 3)

Dyna woke to the sun shining brightly through her bedroom window. The late morning sky was a clear and beautiful blue. Melting icicles left rivulets of water on the window panes. Birds were chirping and singing outside. She was lying flat in the middle of her bed, warm under the thick covers pulled around her shoulders, red hair flared around her head on the ruffled pillow. Only a few glowing embers remained in the smoking fireplace facing the foot of her bed. Lucenna slept in her bed under a mound of blankets.

Dyna moaned slightly, feeling lightheaded and weak. The center of her chest ached as if someone had punched her there. She heard running out in the hall a moment before Cassiel bursts into their bedroom. His wild eyes found hers, his apprehension switching to relief, and she was already reaching for him when he ran for her.

Cassiel pulled her to him, raising her to her knees on the edge of the bed. Every part of him wrapped around her, his whole body simply melting into hers, and he buries his face into her hair, breathing her in. He whispered broken words against her cheek. She understood none but Lev sheli.

Dyna rubbed his back. “I’m all right. I’m sorry for frightening you.”

He brought his strong arms around her waist and rested his head over her chest. His hot breath filtered through her white nightgown, falling over her breast. She turned crimson at the sensation.

“Cassiel—”

“Don’t move,” he held her tighter. “Please.”

He was trembling. She laid her head over his and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. His body slumped against her, feeling comforted by her embrace. They held each other for a long moment.

“I thought…you were….” His voice cracked. “I thought I lost you.”

“I’m sorry,” she told him softly.

Cassiel pulled back a little to look at her with anguish. “What were you thinking? You could have died. What if you did?”

Gale was dying, so Dyna did the only thing she could to save her. Next thing she knew she was sinking into a void where Cassiel’s voice had pleading for her to come back.

“I was scared, too,” she whispered. “I heard you calling me. I tried so hard to find you.”

His anger faded, but his jaw didn’t loosen. A muscle jumped in his cheek as he stared at her. Then he dropped to his knees, and his arms went around her waist, pulling her to him. “You cannot die on me, Dyna. Please, never do that to me again.”

Dyna sighed. “That was the first time I dared to do that.”

He searched her eyes questioningly. “Did you know what would happen if you used that much power?”

She didn’t want to lie, but she knew he was going to be angry if she told him the truth.

“Answer me.”

Dyna sat back on her ankles and looked down at her open palms. “The reason why Essence Healing is draining is because I’m essentially giving my life force when I heal. But it’s safe in small increments,” she added quickly when Cassiel’s mouth fell agape. “My life force replenishes itself.”

His eyes narrowed. “What you did was not a small increment.”

“That was a higher level of Essence Healing. It’s incredibly powerful, but it can sometimes completely drain you…”

“Which is fatal for mages,” he said tightly.

She fidgeted with her fingers. “Yes, but I didn’t think it would be for me because I’m mostly human. Before the barrier, I wouldn’t have been able to do that. I didn’t know what would happen.”

“Yet you risked it anyway!”

Dyna flinched at Cassiel’s shout. Fury overtook his face, and his silver eyes pierced her like shards. She had never seen him so upset. She heard the rustle of Lucenna sitting up in her bed.

“Don’t yell at me,” Dyna said in a small voice. She reached for him but he stepped back. “Please don’t be angry.”

“I am angry!” Cassiel said. “And I have reason to be. You exhausted your powers knowing how dangerous it is and it nearly killed you. Your life is not expendable, Dyna. Not to me.”

“I’m not the only one to jump into dangerous situations. You do the same for me all the time.”

“I’m your Guardian. Your mate. Protecting you is what I’s meant to do.” He clenched his shaking fists. “Have you any idea what it was like to see you fall? To watch Lucenna strike you with electricity to make your heart beat again?” His eyes filled. “I was on the ground, fighting to breathe, as I begged you to come back to me.”

Dyna lowered her wet eyes, unable to see his visible resentment. He hadn’t raised his voice like this since they first met. Back then, Cassiel had chastised her stupidity when she risked her life crossing Hilos. He was looking at her now with that same outraged anger.

“You were at Death’s Gate, Dyna,” his voice cracked. He dropped his head, his hands trembling on the edge of the bed. She heard the call of his heart through their bond, felt his distress at having almost lost her.

“I’m right here,” she told him gently, reaching to brush his hair. “I’m alive because of you. It was your voice that guided me back. I will be careful next time.”

Cassiel looked up wide-eyed and his jaw set. “There won’t be a next time. Promise me. Please. This is the last time you will use Essence Healing. Swear it.”

Dyna stared at him, shocked by the demand. He took her hand but she away. “Cassiel…”

“Dyna—” He scowled when she shook her head. “Can you for once in your life not be reckless? Stop making me worry about you every damn day. Or is it that you enjoy being on the brink of death? Are you so cruel to have me witness it again? I won’t stand for it, so you will end this now. No more healing.”

She sucked in a breath, staring at his unwavering expression.

“You won’t order her about,” Lucenna hissed.

Cassiel’s sharp eyes didn’t look away from her. “Stay out of this.”

Dyna clenched her fists, feeling his tension seep into her. “I took an oath to cure and heal. Essence Healing is a part of that.”

“You are a skilled Herb Master without it. You don’t need it.”

“I have saved countless people with it,” she replied tersely.

“At the expense of yourself!”

“No, it’s not. I told you it’s safe to perform in increments,” Dyna shouted back.

“It’s killing you but you are too senseless to see it!”

Dyna’s eyes stung. He may as well call her stupid again. She didn’t understand why he was being this way.

Rawn was suddenly there, taking his arm. “Prince Cassiel, peace. Lower your voice.”

He jerked free. “Are you in agreement with this, too?”

Rawn didn’t answer.

Dyna angrily wiped away her tears. “You’re being unreasonable, Cassiel. I already explained to you how it works. I only used that amount of power this once. It won’t happen again.”

He shook his head. “I don’t believe that. There will always be someone out there in need of saving.”

It was true and that’s why she chose this trade. Becoming an Herb Master helped her self-heal after the Shadow killed her parents and little brother. She came out of her depression by becoming someone who cured the hurts of others. It was integrated in her life.

“You’re asking me to give up a part of who I am.”

“You have me now,” he said. “I can heal whoever you want with my blood.”

“You can’t do that and I won’t ask you to. This is my choice. I made it. Same as you made a choice to let Zev go at the risk he may end his life.”

Cassiel closed his eyes. He breathed in deeply, then slowly released it. “Dyna, that is different and you know it. I’m trying to keep you alive. That is my purpose. I need that.”

“I don’t.”

He flinched, and she felt the echo of a sharp pang tear through her chest, the same pain that he was feeling now. Dyna’s glare faded when she realized what her words had done to him. He opened his eyes and the anger was gone. They were filled with dismay.

She slipped off the bed quickly, reaching for him. “Cassiel—”

He stepped back, a pained and confusion on his face.

“Saving lives, to me, it’s worth the risk of my own. I don’t need you to protect me from that. It doesn’t mean I don’t need you.”

But he wasn’t listening to her anymore. Cassiel headed for the door.

Dyna grabbed the end of his shirt. “Where are you going?”

He paused, not looking at her as she felt his shield fall into place. “I need some time with the sky.”

She came around to look up at him, though he wouldn’t meet her eyes. “Are you running away from me again?”

He was quiet for a moment. “This is your decision.”

She reached for him again with but stopped. “And you don’t support it.”

He leaned down and pressed his lips softly against her temple. The kiss was tender, but brief. I’m sorry. The words brushed softly against her mind, regretful and broken. I cannot.