Chapter • Death •
“What’s your favorite color?”
“Really? Out of all questions you could ask me, color preference is the first one?” His eyebrow raised higher than the other.
“Mhmm.” Nodding vigorously.
“Okay, Red. My turn.” He shifted his body on his side while supporting his head with a client his fist. “If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would it be?”
I pouted my lips to the side while concentrating.
I didn’t think much about traveling elsewhere, my superficial goal was just to do well in school. Being only 16 years old defeats those thoughts. I have a few years before considering myself eligible for traveling.
“If I could travel anywhere. The first thing would be another state. Then after, that I’d love to visit another country.”
“And after that, another planet?” We both laughed pretty hard at the simple joke.
“Why not.” I shrugged in agreement. “My turn. What was your longest relationship?”
“Like, with a lovely lady?”
“Yes.”
“Only a few months. I usually push people away after getting to know them. For some reason, I don’t fear that with us.”
“Good thing we aren’t in a relationship.” I joked at him.
“Ha! Good one!” He chuckled, “At least not yet.” He winked at me quickly with the eye closest to the bed.
Rolling my eye with a shy smile.
“How many relationships have you been in?”
“Zero.” The quietness in the room was deafening.
He squinted at me in question. As if it was hard for him to understand how that could be true. Yet, it very much was.
“You’re turn.” He pushed without saying anything to my answer.
“Oh, umm.” Pressing an index finger to my lips. “How old is your grandfather?” His smiled had returned.
“96. Unfortantely his health is becoming an issue for him lately. My parents fear that they’ll have to return back to make sure I’m being taken care of.” The smile he carried in the beginning vanished as he explain.
“Oh. I’m sorry.”
“It’s alright.” Taking in a deep breath with his eyes closed, “What happened to you’re dad?”
The questions were starting to get more invasive.
“He died.” Trying to keep my answer short. Since talking about his death brought sadness.
“How?”
“No, no. It’s my turn now.” I shook my finger at him, “What happened to your sister.”
His eyelids widened.
“Honestly, I’m not all too sure. My parents told me she went to live with a friend. Though I heard them late at night in hush tones talking about her. They were talking about how they wish she would come back, that they agreed to not be so tough on her next time.” Glancing to the bed, “I think the said something to her to piss her off and she just up and vanished.” Then he looked back into my eyes. “How did your dad die?”
My throat became dry and unable to swallow without pain. I didn’t want to answer this question. Talking about it was the only thing that made me cry. Even thinking about it could send tears trickling down my face.
“Well, he past away 3 years ago in a car crash.” I took a deep breath to keep calm. “He was driving home from work. Normal Tuesday afternoon. He worked at part time job for some grocery store. Every weekday he’d work in the mornings for some extra cash while my mom was persuing her career.
“He would come home and take a shower then drive to Miranda’s school to pick her up.” My vision began to become blurring due to tears filling my eyes. “My mom received a call while she was at work. The school called saying that my little sister was waiting outside and began crying since she thought our dad forgot about her. Which never happened. He was punctual and couldn’t forget something, even if he wanted to.”
The tear was sent down my cheek and quickly feel off the edge of my chin.
“She called my dad several times and not once did it get answered. So my mom had to leave work early and pick my sister up. While simultaneously figuring out what was going on with my dad.” I coughed out the mucus collecting in the back of my throat. “As she was driving to pick Miranda up, there was heavy traffic due to an collision.”
“Oh no.” He already knew what I was going to say.
“When my mom got closer to the front hold of the traffic and saw the two cars that had crashed. She noticed one of them being my dads car.” I couldn’t keep the tears from flooding my eyes, so I decided to keep them shut. “The car wasn’t viable anymore. It had smashed into something much smaller than it had been before. She drove her car out of the way to see where my dad was at. Seeing if he had survived that crash. The police and fire fighters were using the jaws of life right when she arrived to the scene. My mom saw my dads face in the disaster.
“His skull was significantly smashed and his face no longer looked of his own. The body was caved inside the structure of the smashed car, leaving no room for it whatsoever. The blood dripping out of the car was excessive. Since that day, my mom hasn’t been the same. She tells us the story if we ask but I’ve been the only one brave enough to get the strong details of that day.”
“I’m. So sorry. I wouldn’t have asked if I thought it had been something like that.” The expression on his face was genuinely upset when I opened my eyes.
“The worst part is, Miranda still thinks he forgot about her. She was only 6 at the time and was sad about that. My mom refused to tell her what really happened. Except for that he got in a bad car crash and was no longer coming back. She didn’t understand what the meant. To this day, she thinks he’s just gone. She doesn’t know he’s dead.”
“Does your mom plan on telling her?”
“Have no idea, but next time she asks me. I need to be honest with her. Every time she asks me I hide away to my room and start crying.” Crying like I was right now.
Tony’s hand slowly flew to my cheek to wipe a few tears off my face. Then he wiped this tear on his black shirt.
“I can’t imagine that pain. I haven’t seen someone I love dearly die, yet. You’re strength is admirable. You could have said no to telling me how it happened. I may not have understood at the moment, but I would have respected your decision a hundred percent.” His hand started rubbing the side of my arm.
“I apreciate that, Tony. Having that happen when you’re fresh at being a teenager isn’t a very welcoming celebration. It happened just a few weeks after I turned 13. My mom chose to cremate him, upon the recommendation of the funeral home. Since the body was. In pieces.” I sat up on the bed, rubbing my eyes dry. He sat up with me as we faced one another.
“So instead of a funeral you had a memorial?”
“Exactly right. We had family over at our home. I hide most of the day in my room. I just don’t get along with a lot of my family members since I’m considered the outcast. Or better yet, the elephant in the room. No one bothered me as I separated myself and just read books to make the pain less painful. Also to make the day go by in a blink of an eye. Since reading for me seemed to make time go by incredibly fast. Which is why love diving into books. They create another world to visit that isn’t mine. All the books in my room I’ve read. Some of them I’ve read several times.”
“From what you’ve said about your life so far, I can see as to why.”
“Yeah.” My face slumped downward as I felt upset.
Tony comes closer to me on the bed and grabs me close. Wrapping his arms around me and holding me firmly. The pressure that his hug made was making me feel safe and welcomed. If I could be anywhere forever, it would be in his arms. Though he didn’t carry much of a warm body temperature, his smell was intoxicating enought to not notice.
The smell of is cologne was drawing me in closer, taking deep breaths through my nose to capture as much of the scene as I could. In hopes to keep that smell with me forever.
We seperated our bodies and looked at one another with intense focus.
“I think that’s enough questions from me for today. Do you have any other questions for me?” Shifting his head slightly to the side, showing off his sculptured jaw.
“What’s in the basement?” Even after all that we talked about, the mystery of the stairs that I saw in the kitchen left me questioning.
“Umm.” He hesitated to answer. “There’s old furniture and just old things. Some ancestoral weapons from the past. Nothing too crazy.”
I could tell he was lying somehow. His body language didn’t match his answer. The stiffness of his shoulders gave no quality into his words. Even though the answer wasn’t truthful, I wasn’t about to budge the true answer from him.
We both heard a buzz from within the pocket of his jacket. Glancing at it quickly with a peek from the side of his pocket.
“He’s back with the food. Let’s go downstairs so you can eat.”
Together, we got up from the bed and headed for the kitchen. My eyes felt raw and puffy. Hope his grandfather won’t question my somber face.
We used the same staircase when heading downward. Followed through the hallway and arrived to the kitchen with a growling stomach.
“Miss Rebecca, I have the turkey sandwich and classic chips for you. As you asked.” Anxillion placed the white plate down, already set for me to eat. He had unwrapped everything for me and presented the food as beautifully as he could.
“I really appreciate that, thank you.” Anxillion slowly exited the kitchen with his cane as we left alone in the kitchen.
We settled at the breakfast table and the small simple chandelier above us was well lit and gave me enough light to see Tony perfectly.
“I’m going to take a quick trip to the washroom while you eat. Enjoy your food.” He smiled and stood up and walked off. He headed down the hallway, assuming to the bathroom located not far.
Quickly grazing in the sandwich and chips, fast enough so I didn’t spend too much time filling the void in my stomach. I wanted to continue my day with Tony. Get to know him more.
It felt relaxing being left alone to eat. In a gorgeous kitchen that could fit a large family. All that space to eat.
The last few bites I ate to ensure I wouldn’t get hungry. Normally, I didn’t feel my stomach too full. It usually made me sick and felt like I could vomit any second.
I was finally done and stood up. Grabbing my empty plate and took it to empty sink to be washed. After doing so, I walked around the kitchen and looked through at all the dark grayish-blue cabinets. They all had glass windows, in shapes of pointy clouds. I crossed the opening of the hallways and still saw no sight of Tony. Visionally couldn’t see if the door of the bathroom was opened or closed. Since it was set in the doorframe a few inches.
I caught a glimpse of the doorway to downstairs. My eyes stood still. Embracing the mystery of what was hidden below us. It probably held plenty more secrets of his family.
Taking small light step so ease the noises of the floorboard. Heading towards the doorway. Though I should respect the privacy of his home, I wanted to take a simple glance. Deep down it felt wrong to do so but I would be quick and Tony would suspect a thing.
Entering the doorway, I looked to the right and it was only a dark abyss. Past a few steps, it was too dark to see past and felt like I met eyes with a black hole.
The light switch was just on the near wall, pushing the small switch upward. Everything illuminated.
The stairs dwelled downward leading to only a simple door. The door had a bolt lock on it, which had appeared to be unlocked to a closed door.
I stepped further past the doorway and tried to get a better look down until.
“What do you think you’re doing?” He pulls me out of the space and back into the kitchen. Turns the light back off and then stares me down.
My heart racing from getting caught. I didn’t expect him to come back so soon.
“Hello? Why were you trying to go down there? After I specifically told you, no.” His face casted disappointment so angerly. His arms crossed within each other making noise as the leather shifted against itself.
“I’m sorry. I was only curious.”
“Curiousity killed the cat you know.” My head deeply sunk into my shoulders and hands holding each other behind my back. Unintentionally waiting for handcuffs.
Forcefully shutting my eyes.
“I’m sorry.”
“I forgive you. But I seriously need you to listen to me. The stairs going downward are on the verge of breaking. If something happened to you and you fell in, I would feel responsible. I keep telling my grandfather to attach another door at the top but he said there is no reason.”
Now there is. My snooping could have costed me my health. Guilty, I know I shouldn’t have done yet I was too drawn to the unknown to stop myself.
“I think it’s time to drive you home.” His tone was so scary and felt like I have ruined the whole day by one action. Something I could have prevented easily. Had I just listened.
“I’m truly sorry. Please, I still want to spend this time with you. The mystery of downstairs was bothering me and it was calling me. Poor excuse but I wanted a simple glance.”
“Trust me when I say this, you don’t need to be going down there. I get the mystery, understandable. The problem is that I told you what was down there. Yes, more history lies below us. It’s just not for your viewing. Okay?”
Nodding in agreement.
“I get it. That wasn’t my place to snoop around like so. There is no excuse I can present that will be a replace for my action. I promise not to go against you wishes like that again. Especially in your own home. I’m a guest here and should act as so.”
“Thank you for understanding. Though I must take you home.” Tony headed for the hallway and expected my feet to follow, in which it did.
My feet slump and uneager to leave. The quiet between us was unsettling and I didn’t want this day to come to an end.
Assuming he would no longer want to see me. He must have started to reprogrammed his affection for me and felt disgusted by my lack of self control.
My mind was swirling with doubt as we walked closer to the front door. Would he send me away and stay here? Unable to look at me any longer. Or a quiet, miserable car ride home with us avoiding eye contact. Would I ever see him again after this?
His body language, as we finally attended to the door seemed to distant and had no desire to be around me. Leaving me unwelcomed in his presence and melancholy.
Though the air between us was stiff, he still continued to open the door for me. I felt so undeserving of his continual kindness as I gradually let my unkempt feet walk through the doorway.
The Cadillac was await for us. This time, I didn’t want to be in it. I should have the misery of walking home.
We both traveled to the car at the same pace, leaving plenty of space between us.
He moved a bit fast to catch the door for me. This time, it was the passenger seat instead of the back. I slumped further into my own body. Saddened that he didn’t want to sit next to me. He must be extremely upset and furious with what I had done. I didn’t deserve to sit next to me.
As I fell into the passenger’s seat. I noticed Anxillion wasn’t yet inside the car. My face gloomed downward staring at my own black Doc Martin boots. From my peripheral vision, I could see Tony perimetering around the front of the car. Then opening the drivers door and entering in.
I took are hard look at him as he sat beside me. My thought had been wrong. Instead he was the one that was going to drive.
“Aren’t you suppose have a supervisor while you drive?”
We met soft eyes and I couldn’t stop staring into his.
“I’ve had plenty of practice. There isn’t anything to fear.” Even though I wasn’t fearful. I didn’t want any reason to be pulled over and get in trouble. Better yet, see him get in trouble. Though his style screamed ‘bad boy’ or ‘trouble maker’. Yet is actions spoke a different way.
I look forward through the windshield trying to avoid him, since I felt like I was only going to come across distasteful if I continued trying to apologize. Or feel inconsiderate if I didn’t apologize everything breath I took.
“Are you going to be okay?” He asks with a gentle tone.
My eyes look at his hands driving.
“As long as you don’t hate me. Though I have a feeding sense that you do.”
“What? I don’t hate you. I’m disappointed, yes. That feeling will fade away surely enough. The last thing I want you to think is that I hate you or I regret my feeling for you.” He glances at me as he drives us down the driveway that traveled in waves through the properiy’s woods.
“All I can feel is that you do hate me or that I don’t deserve you.” I stare at the passenger window looking at the trees. The ones that do have leaves are falling due to the fall season. Making the living tree to appear as if their dying.
“What you did wasn’t world ending. I’m going to get over it. And you soon will too. Plus, I’m still expecting a beautiful lady to accompany me on a date. Only if she receives permission, of course.” His handsome grin made me ease a little, since most of my thought were self inflicting.
“I have a feeling running away from school isn’t going to give me permission for a date the next day. Especially with the guy I spent most of the day with.”
“I’m sure you’ll figure a way. If not, I’ll have to sneak into your room when it’s late at night.”
“Uh, no! I’m not breaking rules. Plus if my mom suspects anything, she can open my door. None of us have locks on our doors for that very reason.”
“Yicks. That’s a very dictator move.” He cringes. “Everyone deserves their own privacy.”
“I get it since no one ever want to go in my room, unless it’s supper.”
“Well, bless that.” We both smile at one another.
My mind has eased as we continue talking. His reassurance was necessary, or else this drive home would have nothing pleasant.
“I do hope I get to take you out tomorrow. I have something special planned. If not, it can easily wait for another day.”
“Definitely don’t get your hopes up. I seriously can’t imagine my mom being that lenient.”
“Well, we will just have to wait and see I suppose.”
I nodded.
The car ride to my house wasn’t all that far. I lived close to school and could easily walk to and from. I could even walk to Tony’s house from home if I wanted to. It would take me a good 40-60 minutes with a steady pace. Which could be easily done with the right distractions.
I can see the house down the street. My mom was yet to be home. Since the clock said 2:13. She wouldn’t be home work awhile longer. Not even my brothers were home since school hadn’t ended yet. In their eyes, being home before them was usual since I didn’t hang around saying goodbye to friends after school ends. They wouldn’t suspect me having ditched school. Yet, being unbruised and battle free. That would cause for a questioning.
He drove the Cadillac into the drive way and stopped right at the end so I could easily access the front door.
Cutting the ignition from the key, the door quietly turned off. He pushed himself out of the car and shut the door behind him. Then he met me at my door and opened it for me as he has done before. His hand available for leverage as I took my backpack off my lap and carried it with me as I stepped out.
The heavy backpack was strapped to my back and he started to walk me to the front door.
“I had a great deal of fun today getting to know more about you. Also seeing your face beam at the sight of my home felt special. Thank you for allowing me to entertain you for a portion of the day.” Tony politely spoke to me.
“I had fun as well. And sorry again, about what I had done. I promise to follow your rules when it comes to your home.”
He let me go up the stairs up the patio before him.
“I appreciate it.”
“And thank you for everything you did today. I feel safe because of you. I haven’t felt that since before my dad had past. It’s a lost feeling I have not experienced in awhile.” I stood at the front door holding the straps on my backpack next to my next.
“My pleasure, Rebecca.” Tony bowed his head as he closed his eyes.
I unhooked a strap off my shoulder and dug into the small pocket at the front of my backpack. Where my house key resided. When I took the key out, Tony held his hand out.
“Let me open the door for you.”
I agreed and handed over my keys.
As I placed my backpack back into my back, he pushed the door open. We both stood near the door way. Ready to tell each other goodbye.
“Well, I guess this is goodbye for now.” He told me as he guided his hands towards my body for a hug.
The firm signature hug he gave me was a great finish to our afternoon. Trusting him was all I could do and wanting to be in his arms was all I wanted. The smell of his cologne started to mix in with the body odor of skin. The fragrant reaction was more attracting than the cologne itself. He could bottle that smell and sell it for millions easily.
The jacket was left open so the smell of him can more fluent to my nose. Every breath I took was through my nose. Taking in every little bit of him I could. I began to fall into his arms more letting go of my own balance. He stood strong, catching my weight.
The grasp he had upon me felt desirable and unbreakable.
Though the hug felt not long enough, Tony let go of me and we seperated our bodies. His tranquil smile left me wanting more.
“Goodbye, Tony.” I led myself inside the house.
“Goodbye, Rebecca.”
Shutting the door on him felt wrong, but it was time to seperate and be individuals. He walked off the porch and off to the car as I slowly shut the door.
The days to have flew by so fast.
The door finally shut and I drifted off into the living room. Laying on the couch, breathless. Wondering when we will met again.