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Vox was gone by the time I had gotten back. I didn’t know where he was, or how he could leave me. I felt as though I had been kicked in the gut. I couldn’t catch my breath, and the harder I breathed, the more it hurt. The world felt fuzzy and distant as if I was walking around in a dream. Before I knew it, I was standing outside.

“Emmary!” I turned at the sound of my name. I tried to shake myself awake as I saw Vox walking toward me. “Hey, sorry, Sweetheart. I had to make a call and couldn’t get a signal down there.” He noticed the expression on my face just then. “What’s wrong? How did it go?” He wiped the tear that was falling down with his thumb, “Why are you crying, what happened?” I shook my head, “Emmary, you have to talk to me. What happened?”

“Just everything.”

He tilted my head so I was looking into his gold eyes, “What do you mean?”

“I just, I feel so helpless. I don’t know what I can do to help him. He is completely innocent, Vox, and he is going to rot in that prison for the rest of his life if we don’t do something. I don’t know what, but I have to do something. Please. Help me. I don’t know how to help, but I have to get him out of there.”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

It wasn’t the promise that I wanted. I wanted him to put on his shining metal armor and march back in there and save Koontz. But it was a realistic answer. He was just a person, one that could pull some strings though. “Thank you.”

He wrapped me up in his arms. His chest started to vibrate against my head. He sighed before letting go and pulling out his phone. He stared at it for a second, then looked back at me. “I am so sorry, Emmary. I have to take this. Go home and I’ll be there in a little bit.” He gave me a kiss and then tucked me into a car that was headed home.

I found myself sitting on my bed with the Search Engine propped up on my legs. I twirled my head as I contemplated what to ask. Before I really thought about it, the words spilled out, “Addeck Bly.” I realized how much I wanted to fill the gaps in. How much I wanted to know his whole story.

It didn’t take it anytime to pull up multiple articles and biographies on Addeck. I clicked the first one, the general government blurb about his life. His parents, siblings, his deceased match. He was born in Sector 3 (big surprise there) on Feburary 23, 2092, making him 24 years old. The only fact that I found particularly interesting was that he was dishonorably discharged from the Guard in 2114. No other information was listed as to why.

I went back and scrolled through the links, most were articles about Yale’s death. I had to make a note to come back and read those later. I was looking for information on his discharge right now. I clicked a link that read Selector’s Unstable Son Dishonorably Discharged.

On the morning of November 9, 2114, Addeck Bly was stripped of his rank of Lieutenant Guard. Bly is the son of Selector Lincoln Bly and his wife Mandrine Bly. Bly was diagnosed with Psychological Trauma by the Psychological Health Association after his fiancé, Yale Plancy, committed suicide. Bly had tendencies of both verbal and physical violent outrage along with spells of depression. It has been speculated for many years that Bly has schizophrenia and/or bipolar disorder, but his psychiatric records were never released to confirm or deny these allegations.

Bly’s health issues were discovered after he joined the Guard in late February of 2112.It is speculated that the combination of Plancy’s tragic death and the high demands of the Guard caused Bly’s mind to become unhinged. In October of 2113, Bly was mandated by Guard Court to attend weekly psychological evaluations after his health was under speculation. It was reported that his mental health was improving with each session.

October 31, 2114, Addeck Bly was found by Lieutenant Pike, in his quarters with his blaster loaded and aimed at his head. Pike sprung into action to help Bly, after a physical altercation, Pike managed to subdue Bly and call for help. Because of his efforts in saving a fellow officer, Lieutenant Pike was awarded a Bronze Moon. Bly was immediately sent to the hospital and put under 48 hour watch. Bly now resides at Sector 3′s Mental Health Institute under psychiatric hold until he is seen fit to return to society as mandated by the discharge .

Wow. I couldn’t believe it. I always had the inkling that Addeck was unhinged, but I never knew the extinct of it. He was not only stripped of his rank because he tried to kill himself, but he was placed into a mental health institute because of it. I wasn’t sure if it was solely because of Yale’s death or because there was something wrong with him before. His biography told me that he graduated in the top of his class, with every career school wanting him. Someone like that surely couldn’t have had mental health issues. Right?

I didn’t know anymore. Addeck always acted suspicious what with his lurking in hallways, whispered conversations behind closed doors, his creepy face. His presence always sent a small shiver down my back. Maybe I was judging too harshly. He was clearly going through a rough patch in his life, trying to overcome everything that has happened to him in the past four years.

I decided to click back to one of the articles that discussed Yale’s death. Future Selector’s Match Commits Suicide.

Yale Plancy, daughter of Markum and Ursula Plancy, died by her own hand on January 17th 2112. Plancy did not leave a note of any kind before throwing herself off of the Sector 3 bridge. Officials are still dragging the river for her body.

Yale Plancy’s suicide was witnessed by her fiancé, Addeck Bly. Bly has refused to comment on the tragedy, however his sister, Halston Bly, did give a statement.

“Yale was terribly unhappy. She was always moping about, not to speak ill of the dead, but I was getting a little sick of her complaints. She has a good life here, everything she could ever want at her finger tips. I don’t understand why she would throw all that away.”

Vox Bly, Addeck’s brother had this to say about Plancy’s passing:

“Yale was bottling up a lot of her troubles. She missed her home and family. The only thing that made her happy was Addeck, and he was gone most of the time for work. He loved her, no doubt, and this had definitely hit him hard. We only wish to mourn in peace so we may move on from this traumatic event in all of our lives.”

Plancy’s parents were contacted for a statement, but we have yet to hear from them.

Hal’s comment encompassed her feelings on the matter completely. From the way she always acted when I brought the subject up I could tell she didn’t really understand Yale, but I did. I completely understood her, she was in the same position as I was in now. Hal can be the sweetest person and a great friend but she has never known the feeling of being completely alone, she doesn’t understand that these material possessions don’t mean anything to me.

I saw myself reflected back at me when I read Yale’s article. She was ripped from her home much like I was. She didn’t have to do as much adjusting to this new fancy life like did, but she still had hardships. I pitied her for not being able to handle it, and I was scared that I might end up like her one day if I wasn’t careful.

There was a soft knock on my door, “Come in.” Vox opened the door and walked in quietly. “Hey.” His shoulders were slumped and his eyes casted downward, not looking at me. “Is everything okay?”

He didn’t respond. Worry built up inside me. What had happened? What could it be? I hoped that nothing had happened to Hal, or his parents, or even Addeck. He pinched the bridge of his nose, “I don’t really know how to break this to you.”

My chest tightened. “Break what?”

He sighed and then met my eyes. “So, I did what you asked, and I looked into what we could do to help Koontz…” He trailed off, not really knowing how to finish his sentence.

“What? Is there nothing we can do? There has to be something. Maybe you just didn’t ask the right questions. We have to help him, Vox. Please.”

Vox just shook his head, “We can’t help him because… because he died today.”

“No.” I shook my head, reality wasn’t sinking in. That couldn’t be the news that he came in here to deliver. I just saw him. I just spoke to him. He couldn’t be dead. I just saw him.

Vox took my hands, “I’m sorry, Sweetheart. I didn’t know. I am so sorry.”

“No. They’re wrong. He can’t. I don’t. I just.” I kept blabbering, not forming any real sentences. I didn’t know how to handle this kind of news. My breath was escaping me and my heart felt like it had fallen so far that it was now in Asia. “I just saw him. He can’t be dead.”

“Apparently his last request was to see you.”

I couldn’t remember anything he said after that. I couldn’t remember what I did or how I reacted. All I remember is sitting there, staring at nothing particular. I couldn’t feel anything.

The world seemed to fall away from me. I didn’t know how to react. My best friend was dead. The boy that I loved was now just a cold stiff body about to be burned to ashes. I would never see him again, never hear him speak. He would just be apart of my memories now, nothing more than a ghost of my past life.

He was no longer tangible. I always held on to the day that we might be able to catch up with each other and reminisce about our days growing up together. Now those hopes and dreams were just lonely without him in them.

I played back my last few moments with him. I had promised him that I would help him. Now that promise just hung in the air with the power to haunt me for the rest of my life. Why didn’t I try to do something before? Why was I so slow to spring into action? Why did I sit here an wallow about him instead of formulating a plan? I should have followed up on my statement. I should have made sure that I was doing all that I could. Instead I sat here and read a stupid book. I was worthless. I was the worst friend imaginable. I was his only hope and I let him down.

Now he was gone. Gone forever. I would never see him again. I won’t even see him in the afterlife, because I will be rotting in hell for this and he’ll be sitting pretty in heaven.

I had the opportunity to tell him that I loved him and I chose not to. I chose to be political and not make a mess of my own love life. Now Koontz was a rotting corpse and I was living in a plush ritzy mansion. How selfish could I be? Why couldn’t I just tell him the truth. I loved him. I did. Even though the past few weeks its been hard to realize it with the distance and Vox, as soon as I saw him again, I knew for sure. I loved him, and now he was gone.