SWNOVELS Secrets and Seduction: Chapter 19
We pulled into the empty parking lot, barely a handful of cars around. It was almost pitch dark. Only a few windows spent their golden light but could not illuminate the way. Even the moon did not want to show itself. The thunders that sporadically decorated the night sky did nothing to calm my pounding heart.
Something in the way he sat, the way he looked, changed.
“Have you ever loved anyone, professor?” I blurted out.
I didn’t know why I had spoken those words. It was almost as if his soul had forced me to say what I was thinking. A smile crossed his lips, rough and heart-wrenching.
“Yes. Every time we found each other again, I loved her even more.” I swallowed. That revelation hurt me more than I wanted to admit.
“Why aren’t you together?” I continued to ask, the engine long since turned off.
“Who says we’re not?”
Something flashed in his eyes, a certain challenge, as if I should know how to play this game, as if he would demand it of me and then be disappointed when I didn’t get the rules.
“I see her absence in your eyes.”
He came closer, his scent even more intense.
“She’s not part of my present, and she certainly won’t be part of my future. Fate made sure of that, and I’ve come to terms with it.” No, you haven’t, I wanted to retort, but didn’t want to cause him more pain. He was already consumed with regret.
I moved a little toward him, indulging in the feeling of intimacy, in the darkness where we could tell each other our secrets.
“I’m worried about you,” I whispered, and he gave me a questioning look. “That you’ll never be happy.”
He snorted barely audibly and shook his head.
“I’m happy right now.” I blinked, stunned by his words that danced around my heart like rusty knives, threatening to tear it apart.
He took my chin between his thumb and finger, skin warm in contrast to mine. A silent shudder spread through my body.
“You’re so fucking beautiful, it’s killing me.” Before I could realize, he pulled my face to his, eyes like those of a starving man.
A sharp pain shot through my head, and I cried out. It was almost like someone was shoving scorching nails into my brain.
Images, forgotten and yet forever burned into my memory, surfaced before my mind’s eye.
I was standing in a chapel, wearing a white silk nightgown, the altar lit only by a few candles. A tall man stood next to me and held my hand. At first, I only saw his robe, which was as if from another time, probably meant for sleeping too.
The sweet aftertaste of the forbidden lingered in the air; it was almost as if we had met here in secret, hidden from the outside world.
Anticipation took hold of my body, bliss in my heart. A priest stepped in front of us, speaking words I did not understand.
Even the biting cold around my bare feet did not bother me. There was only the smell of myrrh, the warm body next to me and my wildly pounding heart.
The priest finished his prayer and withdrew, giving us space for a kiss. The man with the irresistible scent turned to me, took my chin between his thumb and finger, and….
My heart skipped a beat as I stared into Alexander Preston’s beautiful eyes.
“What’s wrong?” a deep voice sounded, shaking me out of my trance. I looked around, was back in the darkened car.
“Nothing,” I assured him. “I just have a headache. They’ve been getting worse lately.” He looked at me, eyes narrowed.
“Then let’s go.” Mr. Preston’s stony expression returned, and I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from begging him to stay in the car a little longer.
He stepped outside, and I did the same, the merciless rain already soaking my clothes once more. The wind had died down in this part of the area and didn’t make me feel as cold as I had on my way home.
I made it to the hood, took another moment to calm down, and massaged my temples to dispel the illusions. My professor came to my side, his steps prideful and elegant.
“Are you sure you’re alright?”
“Yeah, it’s just…do you hallucinate sometimes?” Okay, I really sounded like a crazy person right now. I wish I’d kept my mouth shut.
He took one step closer, then two, until he was standing in front of me. Despite the cold, I felt the heat of his body as if he were lying on top of me.
To create some space between us, I stepped back but didn’t get far, my ass already pressed against the hood.
“No. What are these…hallucinations showing you?” he asked, not mockingly or derogatorily, but out of sheer curiosity.
“You can’t really call them hallucinations, I don’t know. They’re like memories I had never created.” Or maybe it was just that weirdo Flavian around, making fun of my suffering. Of course, I didn’t tell my professor this detail.
“What memories exactly?” he urged, his body dangerously close to mine.
He towered over me, and I glanced up, looking into the familiar yet strange face that haunted me.
“It’s not important.” I wanted to step away from him, back into the academy, but he caged me in, one arm to my right, one to my left.
“Tell me.” He took a deep breath. “Please.” All I had to do was lean forward a little, lift my head, and our lips would have touched.
“Memories of us,” I breathed. He closed his eyes, trying to hide from me what it looked like inside of him. I wonder what he thought of me now. “I’m not crazy, I swear.” And I certainly didn’t want to call these illusions memories.
He shook his head and opened his eyes. I couldn’t interpret the emotions that were playing out in them. Anger? Disappointment? Desire?
Without warning, his lips crushed to mine. One hand was on my lower back, pressing me against his body. The other caressed my jaw.
He murmured something unintelligible between our kisses, but I couldn’t focus on anything but his tongue in my mouth.
There was nothing loving, nothing tender about this kiss. It was ravenous, feeding on insatiable desire.
I bit his lower lip and he let his fingers slide under my soaked top, clawing into my flesh for fear I would run away.
I leaned back, my spine pressed against the car, and he bent over me, shielding my body from the rain.
My fingertips traced the contours of his chest, his arms, his belly, wanting to feel him everywhere. What we were doing right now wasn’t enough to satisfy my hunger.
“Touch me,” I brought out between frantic breaths, and he obeyed, massaging my stiff nipples and parting my thighs with his knee.
His mouth moved to my throat, sucking on the sensitive spot above my pulse.
“Alexander,” I moaned. “More.” With one deft movement, he unbuttoned my jeans, and I whimpered as his cold fingers slid under my panties.
Nervously, I glanced to my right, wanting to see if people were watching.
“No one comes here, not at this hour.” He nipped at my bottom lip as his finger thrust into me.
My hips buckled up when my professor pushed another finger inside me and worked them in and out, slowly at first and then with a rhythm I barely could take any longer.
I exposed my throat to him, let him mark me, claim me. Tonight, I was his, and he was mine.
Alexander licked over my nipples, aching with desire, and bit into my skin until it almost hurt. I enjoyed the pain, also enjoyed his fingers, which he had buried knuckles deep inside me.
I didn’t care what circumstances had brought us here, what would happen tomorrow. I knew only one thing: I needed him, had to feel him in all kinds of ways.
“Please.” I curled one hand into his hair and pulled his mouth back to mine, claiming his lips.
“Please what?” he asked, smirking against my mouth.
“Please fuck me. Now.” I didn’t care if the whole school was watching as long as I could feel him deep inside me.
“Just because you begged, love.”
Alexander let go of me and I heard how fabric tore, felt the cold and the rain between my legs. Oh God, he had ripped my jeans in two.
He took off his leather jacket and carelessly dropped it onto the dirty ground, leaving him with only a loose t-shirt.
He paused briefly, eyeing me from top to bottom, as if he wanted to burn this sight into his memory.
His pitch-black hair stuck to his temples, clothes soaked through, so that I could trace the contours of his body with my eyes. How I would have loved to have him naked under me right now.
His eyes were still on me, on my breasts and between my legs, while he unbuttoned his jeans, freeing his length.
I licked my lips, wondering if he would even fit inside me. But my hunger for Alexander took over, and I bucked up my hips, urging him to hurry.
“Are you sure you want to cross this line?”
“Yes,” I breathed. I had never been so certain of anything in my life before—I wanted to give him, us, this moment.
He lifted me further up, and I hooked my legs around his waist, trembling from the cold or anticipation.
Alexander positioned his tip at my entrance. Our eyes met as he slammed into me with one powerful thrust.
I couldn’t help a whimper, my nails digging hard into his skin and drawing blood. His size widened me, and I felt a sharp pain in my lower belly.
Damn, it hurt so bad I didn’t think I could ever enjoy it. Agonizingly slow, he pulled out, only to push himself harder into me. The stabbing pain didn’t stop, no, it only got worse.
My professor noticed my tortured expression and changed the pace, but I didn’t want him to stop. No, my body was screaming for him, for his touch.
I buried my face in the crook of his neck and matched his thrusts, relaxing around the width of his cock until the pain gave way to something much more intense.
“That’s it, relax, I’ll take care of you,” he whispered against my hair, and I nodded, letting him take the lead.
Alexander set up a deep, brutal rhythm, making me take every inch of him—and finally enjoying it.
My whimpering was replaced by hoarse moans. His length pressed on the right place, quickly, mercilessly gliding over the spot that almost pushed me over the edge. My lips found his, our kisses a promise never to be made.
Alexander
I love her, I love her, I love her so much.
Feeling Avery around my dick was the most intense moment since our wedding night when we snuck out and vowed to always search for each other no matter where the wind carried us.
And she slowly started to remember, which only broke my heart even more. I couldn’t help but lower my head, take her nipple between my teeth and bite. I knew exactly what she liked, knew all her desires as if they were my own.
By now I was more monster than man, driven by the primal instinct to possess her, to brand her as mine, to bury myself completely inside of her.
She was so wet, so tight, so perfectly made for me. Her mouth fell open, and she threw her head back, looking up at the stars. But not even they could help her now. With each of my thrusts, with each of her moans, and with each of our kisses, we sealed our fate.
Avery’s movements became jerkier, her muscles tightening around my dick until she let out an earth shattering scream that crept up to my very marrow.
I gave her no time to relax, thrusting into her as if feeling her warmth for the last time. My breath quickened and I could no longer hold back, having waited far too long for this moment.
With a growl of pure ecstasy, I burst into a thousand pieces.
Avery
I winced as he pulled out of me and gently lowered me back down. My gaze wandered between his legs, to the smear of blood.
Something in his face changed as he realized what that meant. Alexander took my face between his hands and kissed me, our touch as delicate as a feather.
I felt his seed running down my inner thigh and I swear it turned me on even more. Alexander had clawed his way into my brain and claimed my soul with his addictive venom. I let him, was already doomed.
He let go of me and I tried to cover up, to protect myself from the heavy rain that was still pouring down on us.
‘Here, put this on.’ He dug out an old pair of sweatpants from his trunk and I disappeared into the backseat of his car to get rid of the wet piece of fabric.
I was so sore that I cringed with every step, but I didn’t want to let my pain show.
A little drier, I stepped out of his spacious car, and we made our way back to the school in silence. I didn’t dare say anything, for fear of ruining the moment or scaring him off.
Our cold skin was met by comforting warmth, the hallways narrow and dark. It seemed like an eternity that we were walking straight ahead, and my shaking had slowly subsided.
Alexander’s fingers brushed mine, a reminder that he was here with me. I shuddered at the innocent touch, and little flashes ran through my arm up to my chest. He intertwined his pinky with mine, and it felt like the safest anchor in the world.