Sea Of Sparks And Shadows

Hey everyone! This story has the last two chapters removed. To read them, please head over to Webnovel and search for this book. By doing so, you would be supporting me while also getting to know what happened to the Amaris and the crew. Thank you for reading!

Amaris stepped into the office with an inexplicable amount of dread. Still, she tried to shake it off and smiled as she faced the captain. “Is everything alright?” She asked.

The captain didn’t answer straight away. He closed the door and turned to face her. The long silence and long look he gave her didn’t help calm her nerves. “Take a seat.”

She slowly pulled out a chair and lowered herself onto it. All the while, her eyes did not leave her father. “What is it?” She asked again.

“Before you boarded this ship, where were you intending to go?” He asked whilst slowly pacing the room.

“To a friend of Vanya’s.” She answered, “She was going to keep me in her house until I could find a proper job to support myself. Why?”

“Would you have been happy there?”

“What is this about?” She asked skeptically. “What is happening?”

“Please,” His voice sounded different, thicker. “Answer me.”

“I suppose I wouldn’t have been miserable. It would have been better than the mansion, and as soon as I’d found a job and gained enough money I’d rent my own apartment.” She shrugged. Then added cautiously. “But that doesn’t matter, does it? I’m here now. Not there.”

The captain stayed silent. And Amaris’ worry grew. “Please, captain. Tell me what is going on.” She still couldn’t call him father. It sounded too strange to her ear, too heavy on her tongue. And yet the phrase ‘captain’ sounded wrong too.

“We will reach Paradelia in two days’ time.”

“And?”

“And… I want you to stay there.”

Amaris laughed. It was a short sudden laugh, the kind that scratched the back of the speaker’s throat as it came out and promised that the coming conversation would not be pleasant. “You must be joking.” When his expression did not change, she went on. “You can’t be serious. You don’t want me to leave.”

“No, I do not. But you must. I arranged an amount of money that could keep you sheltered and fed for-”

“I don’t want your money!” She yelled. “I’m not going. I refuse to leave.”

“You have to understand. It’s for the best.”

“What’s for the best? Pushing me away? Tricking me into forgiving and accepting you then throwing me away again?”

“Amaris-”

“No! You cannot do that!”

“You do not belong here damn it!” He finally shot back. “You’re not supposed to be training with pistols and swords. You’re not supposed to be running away from soldiers and order keepers. You’re not supposed to have bullet injuries and wounds from dealing with the spirits. You’re not supposed to be on this ship.”

“You mean in your life.” She answered quietly. “You mean I’m not supposed to be in your life. You didn’t expect a daughter and now you have one and you don’t know what to do with her. So you’re running away again.”

“That’s not-”

“Perhaps I was too quick to believe you.” She added quietly.

Silence fell. Amaris’ chest swelled with too many emotions that she felt burning inside her like an all-consuming fire.

“Fine,” The captain finally said, “Paint me as a villain if you must. You were right. I do not want you in my life.” The words stung more than she’d expected. “I do not want you in my life. Or on this ship. You do not know how to fight-”

“I’m getting better at it.” She defended. She wasn’t sure if he heard her because he did not stop.

“You defied me in Niveus Castle and in the white circle. You do not know how to follow orders. And even worse, you drive others to ignore them as well. Wind Tuner blatantly ignored my command when I ordered him to take you away. Hell, you almost caused a full on rebellion in the white circle when you wanted to make them vote.”

“I got everyone out of there alive.” She pointed out. “If Wind had taken me away no one would have survived.”

““What if it hadn’t worked? What if your plan ended up with everyone drowning? Do you realize that you would have died? Do you realize that Slygrin would have died too?”

Amaris didn’t answer.

The captain turned to his shelves and fiddled with the bouquet of dry roses. “You have the rest of today and tomorrow to say your goodbyes. I expect you off my ship as soon as we lower the anchor.”

Amaris didn’t argue. She merely headed to the door and opened it. Before she walked out she softly whispered, “Perhaps Cynthia and grandma were right after all. You are nothing but a cowardly man who can’t face his responsibilities so you run away from them.”

The sound of the door shutting echoed through the cabin louder than any gunshot.

*****

Amaris skipped dinner that evening. She didn’t go to the cabin either. Instead, she spent the night in the crow’s nest watching the dark horizon and the starry sky. She couldn’t sleep. She found it hard to even breath. She just let her tears flow down as she sat frozen, her hopes and dreams melting away until they were nothing but a puddle of despair and disappointments.

She didn’t realize how late -or early- it was until she heard the familiar melody of Wind Tuner’s flute. Though it had no effect on the morning wind this time, he still stood at the bow each morning playing it out of habit more than necessity. And Amaris appreciated it. Especially now that she knew that this may be the last time she would ever hear it.

She still didn’t budge. She watched the sunlight creep up over the horizon and slowly ascend and grow until it brightened the whole sky. But it would leave again. The sun would leave the sky once more and it would take its light with it too. It would leave the sky dark and empty and it wouldn’t care if it needed it or if it wanted it to stay. The sun would leave because that was what it always did.

“Are you planning to come down from there?” The loud question matched with the harsh knocking on the mast made Amaris jump. She crawled to the trapdoor and peered down. Hawk stood below, still rapping angrily at the mast.

“What is it?” She called down. Her voice was raspy and low. She hadn’t used it in hours and it showed.

“Get the hell down here.” He scowled up at her. “As long as you’re still on this ship you still have a job to do. So get your arse down here and get to the galley.”

Before she could answer he turned and walked away muttering something to himself. She smiled slightly then climbed down the ladder. He was right. She still had some chores to do. That was better than sitting there all day. She would have the rest of eternity to sit alone and observe the world.

When she made her way to the galley, she found her work set for her. A pile of fish some sailors must have caught that morning were on one side of the table, an empty chopping board and a knife on the other.

“Look who’s finally here,” Hawk welcomed her. He stood at the counter. Pulling out something from a drawer. “Start with scaling the fish,” He nodded towards the pile of dead creatures. Amaris slowly approached the stack and picked one from the top. She placed it on the chopping block then reached for a knife as she heard Hawk drag a stool to the table.

“So how many of them know?” She said after a while.

“All.” He answered straight away. “I thought you learned your lessons the last time but let me spell them out for you, kid. One, those walls aren’t very good at muffling very loud conversations. And two, the men on this ship trade rumors like a card dealer trades, well, cards.”

Amaris simply nodded. So, they all knew she was leaving. This day was certainly going to be fun.

They worked quietly for a while and then, “You know,” Hawk took one of the fish Amaris had scaled and chopped off its head. “I had a daughter too. If she-” He swallowed and brought his knife down once more. The fish’s tail slid across the table and stopped in front of Amaris. She did not move. Instead, she watched him silently. “She would’ve been about your age.” He finished. “And let me tell you something. If she were to board this ship right now and come up to me and tell me she wanted to stay by my side and travel the Grey sea with me,” His knuckles were white on the handle of the kitchen knife. It still shook slightly as he spoke. “If she were to do that, I would have kicked her out and back into our small cottage in Miruina.”

“Why?” Amaris dared to ask, “You didn’t see her in years. You obviously love her. So why wouldn’t you stay with her?”

“Because I would rather die a thousand painful deaths than have my daughter’s life constantly in danger.” Amaris went silent. “You’ve only stayed here for three weeks. What you saw, Sinsecria’s Naval Army, Manticali’s order keepers, that’s nothing compared to what we have to go through every time we board this ship. I’ve had to amputate injured soldiers. I’ve seen honest men bleed to death. Others had their throats ripped out or set on fire alive. I will be damned if I let my daughter see that. Let alone have it happen to her.”

Amaris didn’t know how to answer that. So she stared at her chopping board instead. The rest of the meal was prepared in complete silence.

***

Left, right, right, left, down, right, fake, thrust.

“I think that is enough,” Said Mecheye, throwing his wooden sword to the ground. He did not look tired. If anything, this fight only made him more alert. Amaris on the other hand, was a panting mess. But the impressed smile Mecheye gave her made it feel like it was all worth it. “You’ve practiced,” He noted.

“Yeah, I- uh, tried a few exercises recently.” A blush crept up her cheeks at the memory.

Mecheye didn’t appear to notice because he simply nodded. “They seem to be working. Great job.”

“Thank you.”

They made their way to the deck entrance and Amaris pulled herself up to sit on a barrel while Mecheye arranged their practice weapons in their place and poured her a glass of water. “How’s the shoulder?” He asked.

“Much better.” She nodded her thanks as she accepted the water and drank it greedily. “Turns out, Hawk had gathered some herbs from the island and he used some of them to make me some salve.” It barely stung at all when she moved it. ’ ’twould be completely healed in a few days,’ Hawk had told her.

“That’s good.”

Amaris fiddled with her bracelet. “So how long are we going to pretend like this is not our last training session?” She finally asked.

Mecheye chuckled and looked up at her. “I’m going to miss you.” He said.

“Me too” she muttered. “You’re one of the very few sane people around here,” She joked.

“I’m going to miss him too.” He nodded towards Spark, who had been floating in circles all afternoon.

Amaris watched the small machine for a long time before speaking. “Keep him,” She said.

“What?”

“I said keep him,”

“Amaris, I didn’t mean for you to-”

“I know,” she nodded. “But I want you to have him.”

“I couldn’t,”

“Please, you’ve taught me so much and you’ve helped me a lot. I just want to give you this one thing in return.” When the moment got too heavy she added “Not to mention, you’re the only one around here who knows how to take care of it and won’t treat it like a metal juggling ball.”

Mecheye laughed. “Thank you. I will take very good care of him, I promise.” He crouched down next to the small machine and touched its smooth round surface. Spark hovered in its place. Its wheels bounced up and down in a wobbly rhythm. Amaris’ heart broke at the thought of leaving Spark behind but she knew it would be better this way. Mecheye really did help her and he would maintain Spark very well. She knew that. Another reason for her decision, one that she didn’t let herself think about too much, was that she wanted to leave a mark behind on this ship. Something her friends could remember her by and something her father wouldn’t be able to escape. Something to remind him of what he did. It was her last rebellion.

“I wanted to give you something, too.” He got up and pulled something from his jacket that he had hung on the rail. He handed her a leather clad book.

“What is this?” Amaris opened it. No, it wasn’t a book. It was a notebook.

“I noticed the notebook that you always scribble your inventions on was almost full so I thought you could use a new one.” he said.

“Thank you,” She said as she flipped through the thick pages. “This is wonderful. I will remember you whenever I use it.”

“Remember all of us,” He corrected. Mecheye’s eye caught on something in the sky and he smiled knowingly. “Someone else wants to say goodbye.”

Amaris turned around and followed his gaze. Ash was coming down the ladder on the main mast. When he got low enough, he jumped and turned to face her. A small tentative smile graced his lips. “Mind if I take her for a bit?”

“She’s all yours.” Mecheye waved his hand and made his way to the stairs.

Hey everyone! This story has the last two chapters removed. To read them, please head over to Webnovel and search for this book. By doing so, you would be supporting me while also getting to know what happened to the Amaris and the crew. Thank you for reading!