Sea Of Sparks And Shadows

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Amaris twirled her bracelet over and over as she tried to stop her mind from wandering to the endless possibilities. She didn’t know why, but being in the presence of the captain always got her worked up. Maybe it was the fact that he controlled this ship and could have her locked in a room for the rest of the trip, or maybe it was his emotionless face and the strict rigid way he held himself. She didn’t know. Either way, she wasn’t looking forward to meeting him.

Hawk stepped aside and gestured for her to get in. She masked her hesitation and discomfort, pulled her bracelet under her shirt and walked in with all the confidence she didn’t have.

The captain nodded towards her. “please, sit.” he gestured towards the mismatched chairs near the round table covered in maps. She silently did as she was told. Her eyes couldn’t help trailing back to the shelf of dried roses. It was the same as how she remembered it. The same bouquet and the same stack of petals.

Her thoughts came back to reality when she heard the scraping of wood on wood. Hawk dragged a chair next to hers and sat down.

The captain watched her carefully for a few heartbeats before he spoke again.

“I will cut straight to the chase.” He walked around the room in slow steady steps, his hands clenched behind his back. “what do you know about the dark emperor?”

Amaris swallowed her gasp. This was not a good beginning.

“He’s the king of Sinsecria. He controls the rulers of the other countries and he’s the one who started the black draft. Some people say he’s immortal or that the spirits gifted him a long life, but no one knows for sure.”

Try as she might she couldn’t speak clearly. She tripped over her words and her mind reeled from all the possibilities. Was she on a ship that works for the dark emperor? Was this the ship that carried the draft subjects? Is that why she wasn’t allowed into most rooms? No. the ship they fought...it had soldiers from Sinsecria too. Why would they be fighting them? Unless-

“good.” The captain said. “and how do you feel about him?”

Amaris opened her mouth a few times but closed it again. Was this a trick question? Were they looking for traitors?

“Am I here to get answers or am I here to be questioned?” she finally spoke, anger coating her anxious words.

The captain smiled and she wasn’t sure she liked it. “that’s all I needed to know.”

“excuse me?”

“have you heard of the moon soldiers before?”

“Who?” She blinked at the change of subject.

“The moon soldiers is the name of the rebellion against the dark emperor. Moonlight can vanquish the darkness. They’re working through all the countries of the grey sea to put an end to his reign and the black draft that he started.”

“why are you telling me this?” she dreaded the answer before it left his lips.

He turned towards her and looked her in the eye as he spoke. “we are part of the moon soldiers.”

“Wh-what?”

“This ship, the silver crescent, is part of the communication and resources team. We’re responsible for gathering ammunition and food for the soldier camps and transferring information from one country to another. I was not going to tell you any of this. Leaving you clueless would have benefited both of us. But after the battle you witnessed yesterday, I’m sure you had... questions. Many of my men trust you too and most voted for telling you. So here we are.”

Amaris didn’t speak. She gaped at the captain, who waited patiently for her response.

“you alright, kid?” Hawk’s voice was softer than she ever heard it. He watched her carefully, waiting for her outburst.

She gulped down a breath of much needed air before nodding. “Yes, I’m fine.”

“I trust you understand the importance of discretion in our case. Everything will go on normally. The same chores and the same hours, just with truer knowledge now.”

“You mean the knowledge that the ship could be attacked at any moment and that you’re probably wanted by Sinsecria?” She couldn’t stop herself from muttering.

Hawk snorted. “try, every country on the grey sea.”

She huffed a sigh. “Sounds exciting”

“The good news is that, assuming you finished fixing the engine.” He paused and she nodded in confirmation. “We will reach land in three days. You can leave and never look back. You traveled on a merchant ship and the journey went peacefully by without any occurrences.” There was an edge to his last sentence. A warning of sorts. She found herself nodding her head with more enthusiasm than she was feeling.

“good.” He nodded and turned away. “You may leave now. Thank you.”

“you can take the morning off for fixing the engine.” Hawk added. “get some rest. You look like you need it.”

***

Amaris was woken up by a gentle hand nudging her shoulder. “Amaris, wake up.” She swatted the hand away, groaning. “Hawk gave me permission to soak you in water if you don’t get up.” She recognized Mirage’s amused voice.

“I’m awake.” She forced her upper body to sit up, her eyes still half closed.

“That was easy.” He smirked and sat down on a wooden box across the barn.

“Hawk gave me the morning off.” She rubbed her eyes and yawned.

Mirage looked at the entrance.

“Well it’s past noon. I guess your time’s up.”

She groaned again and leaned on the wall. “Great. So what do I have to do?”

He smiled and threw her something.

She was too slow to catch it and it fell on her lap. As soon as she recognized what it was, she threw it to the floor. “what the hell?” she yelled glaring at Mirage.

“guess we’re going to have to work on your reflexes too.” He said coolly and stood up. As if he didn’t just throw her a pistol.

“why are you giving me this?” that was one way to chase away her sleepiness.

“Hawk wants me to train you.” He said. “he spoke to the captain and they think that it might be a good idea to have you able to defend yourself in case of another... incident.”

She blinked. “you want me to shoot this thing?” she pointed at the pistol on the floor.

“I want you to learn how to. Sword fighting too. Hopefully, you won’t need to, but it wouldn’t hurt to be ready.”

“but-”

“come on, we don’t have all day.”

She froze watching him casually walk out of the room with his hands in his pockets, before huffing an exasperated breath and following him outside taking with her the dreaded weapon.

***

“right foot forward. And keep your back straight.”

“Would you shut the hell up?” She glared at Ash, who was watching her train with Mirage. He sat on a barrel with an apple and made sure to show just how amused he was at her inexperience with guns.

He only smirked and chewed on his snack, still watching her posture.

Reluctantly, she stepped into the position he instructed. She aimed at the can mirage had placed on the edge of the handrail and pulled the trigger. The bullet zipped right past it and into the sea.

Ash snorted and Amaris scowled at him.

“Close,” Mirage said from behind her. He uncrossed his arms and stepped forward. “Try aiming at the center of the can.”

“Where do you think I was aiming it? At its non-existent arm?” Mirage couldn’t hide his smile fast enough and Amaris’ scowl deepened.

“Screw you both.” She threw the gun to the ground. “I think I’ll go help Wind with dinner. At least he won’t mock me.”

“Wait.” Mirage laughed and caught her wrist. “I apologize. Really. It’s just your reactions are very amusing.”

“thanks.” She deadpanned, pulling her arm away from his grasp.

“you just look so upset when you miss and it’s only been one hour. We trained for years and still miss sometimes. You have to be patient.”

“which is exactly my point!” she threw her hands in the air in defeat. “I leave in a couple of days. I won’t get better at this anytime soon and I’ll be safe by the end of the week so why are we wasting time like this? More importantly, why are we wasting bullets? Don’t you need them?”

“we don’t know if we’ll get attacked again. we don’t want to take any chances.” Mirage’s eyes darkened as he spoke.

“but-”

“any knowledge is better than no knowledge at all. Now pick up that pistol again, this time try aiming a bit more to the left and lower.”

Amaris sighed and tried again. This was going to be a long day.

********

As soon as Amaris walked into the mess hall, she felt eyes on her. in the past couple of days, the curiosity of the sailors had subsided and she was able to blend into the shadows, but today felt different. Maybe it was the fact that she now knew their secret? Or was it that she was able to get the engine to work again? Were they wary of her or did they respect her? She didn’t know and she didn’t care, she wanted whatever it was to stop. She hated the glances.

Hawk silently served her the two ladles of soup and she sat crossfeet on the ground to eat. She’d lost hope a while back to ever find a chair unless she came early, which she never did.

“Tough day?” Slygrin sat across from her.

She grunted a response and he smirked. “I have to admit, watching you train was the most entertainment I’ve had in ages.”

“You saw me?” she lifted her brow.

“Barrleman, remember?”

She scowled. During her training session, she had managed to hit the targets twice. It sounded decent enough until she realized that she’d been training for the last six hours.

“How’s Mecheye?” she changed the subject.

“He’s doing alright.” He shrugged. “Still stubborn as hell and won’t rest no matter what.”

“That’s putting it lightly,” Hawk interjected, “I had to get the cap’n to order him to bed just so he won’t leave his cabin to check on the rest of the injured. That man needs to learn some self preservation.”

“Are you a healer, Hawk?” She asked suddenly.

“What?” he exclaimed, sounding offended. Slygrin snickered. “Kid, I think you got a little too much sun today.”

“Mostly your fault,” she shrugged off her embarrassment. “But I mean I saw you take that bullet out of Mecheye’s shoulder and I just thought you were...”

“No, kid. I know some basic herbal healing, but I don’t do dark weaving. When we have to, we get some healing potions from them but I’m not one of ’em” Amaris didn’t miss the hint of disgust in his voice. “I’m not a weaver in the first place.”

“You really think healers are dark weavers?” She asked spinning her spoon through her soup.

“What else would they be? They take the weaving abilities the heavens gifted them and turn them into something they’re not. Sounds like dark weaving to me. Whether they use it for making healing potions or cursing spells doesn’t matter.”

“I thought they were born with their abilities,” she asked.

“I don’t believe that,” he scoffed, “the heavens wouldn’t gift a single person that much power.”

In the last few months, Amaris had met a decent amount of healers who came to try and find out what was wrong with her grandmother. All of them were friendly, some stranger than others, but they all seemed like good people. It didn’t feel right to accompany their names with darkness or the disgust that frequently appeared in the speaker’s expression.

“Don’t mind him,” Slygrin snapped her attention back to him. “He’s just pissed cause they took all the weaving and left him with nothing.”

Hawk’s scowl deepened and he hit him with the laddle. “Say what you want but those people’s powers come from hell.” He stood up. “I’ll go see the cap’n.” With that, he made his way up the stairs.

“What about you?” she asked.

“What about me?” he asked, and reached for a cup on the table while staring at something on the ground; A huge spider right by her ankle.

Amaris recognized it from a book she read a while ago. It wasn’t poisonous. she let out a breath and looked back up at slygrin.

“Are you a weaver?”

“Naw,” he smiled proudly and placed the cup over the spider trapping it in. He carefully flipped it up wards. “The spirits gift weaving to those who need it. If I want to, I can already open the gates to hell as it is. I can take care of myself without growing flowers or turning into some rabbit.”

“I guess that’s one way to look at it.” She twirled her bracelet around.

He smirked and picked up the cup.“Don’t believe me? Just watch.”

He strolled to one of the two tables. a group of huge burly men sat there enjoying their dinner while playing a game of cards amaris still didn’t understand. Slygrin approached one of the largest men. His eyebrows were bunched as he concentrated on the cards in his hand, a jug held in the other.

“Shark, how’s the game going?” Slygrin smiled and threw his hand around the man’s neck letting the cup tilt. “Need any help?”

The man shrugged off his arm and frowned. “I can handle this. Do I look like I need your-” Suddenly, Shark noticed the huge black spider crawling its way up his chest. “What the hell?!” he yelled and leaped out of his chair flipping the whole table with his movement. He yelled and swatted at the spider until it fell to the ground then stepped on it repeatedly, a look of horror still on his face. He only stopped once he noticed the chorus of laughter all around him.

“Slygrin!!!” he roared, his red gaze scanning the hall for the small boy. But he was already gone, hiding in the galley, only his snickers left behind.

*****

The ship was completely dark when Amaris left the barn and headed to the edge of the starboard.

The quiet was comforting as a change from the constant bustling that filled the deck all day. The light crashing of the waves and whistling wind was the only melody she could hear.

She stared at the dark water below her, the shimmering stars reflected in it.

With a deep, miserable sigh, she pushed back against the handrail and picked up the can that lay a few feet away from her. She placed it on top of the rail then took a few steps back. She pulled the pistol from her waistband and aimed at it. She pulled the trigger. Too far to the left. Again. Too far up. again. Close but not enough.

Frustrated, she aimed again. She hated failing. She hated not knowing how to do something. Or doing it in any way less than excellent.

“I thought you hated shooting lessons.”

Amaris jumped back and snapped her head up. Ash was leaning on the door that led to the cabins.

“What do you want?” she huffed.

He shrugged and sauntered towards her.

“Couldn’t sleep. Came up here to think. Turns out there’s a comedy show that I don’t want to miss.”

She scowled at him and turned back to her target.

“Like you were any better when you started.” she muttered.

She shot again.

She missed again.

He snorted and she turned to him. “Well, I’d like to see you try.” she snapped.

And though she couldn’t see much of his expression, she was sure he was smirking when he stepped forward. he took the gun from her hand and whispered. “Watch and learn, princess.”

He then moved to the edge of the port, as far away from the can as the deck would allow, and aimed. Amaris took a few steps back and observed his posture, his confident stance, the way his steady arm slid into position. And then, the way his finger pulled the trigger and the way the bullet whizzed through the deck and hit its target. She heard a splash a beat after the can disappeared from the taffrail.

She stayed frozen in place as Ash wordlessly handed her back the pistol. He made it look so easy and she hated him for it.

He placed a new can on the edge and turned to her. “Your turn.” She swallowed and nodded. She mimicked his posture as closely as she could then shot. Another miss.

He shook his head and stepped closer, he held her wrist and lifted it up a few inches. “You underestimate your height.” he murmured.

Then he pulled her left hip back. she looked up at him and found his face barely an inch away from hers, she could hear every breath he took and she found her heartbeat racing at the proximity. But he wasn’t looking at her. he was focused on the target as he tugged at her hip again and she instinctively stepped back. “You’re more balanced like this. Better aim too.”

she swallowed and nodded, as he turned her shoulders slightly. Finally satisfied, he took a step back.

“Good, now shoot.” She slowly unhooked her gaze from his grey eyes and focused them again at the can.

She pulled the trigger and blinked repeatedly at the now empty space in front of her. “I... I did it?” A smile broke onto her face and she felt like jumping and dancing and giggling. Instead, she repeated with more conviction. “I did it!”

“Good.” Ash smiled as he placed another can where the others were positioned. “Now try to do it on your own.”

“How long did it take you to get so good at this?” she asked.

He shrugged. “About ten years. When you need to learn something to survive, you tend to learn it quicker.”

“You’ve been on this ship for ten years?” she gaped.

“No, for about four years.”

“What did you do before that?” she asked. “What was it that made learning how to shoot people a survival skill?”

Suddenly, his voice lost all warmth. his amusement disappeared as he ordered. “Aim. Shoot. Now.”

Amaris obliged. Whatever it was she stumbled upon, it was clear Ash wasn’t eager to discuss it.

****

Amaris slipped out of the mess hall right after breakfast. She knew that Hawk would start searching for her as soon as he looked up from the stack of papers that never seem to unattach to him, but until then, she had some time for herself.

She headed straight to the engine room. She knew that the engine didn’t need any other work. She made sure of it. But she just needed its company. Sometimes the mere feeling of her sharing a space with a metal machine made her feel better, more energetic, and happier. Content. She never understood why but she guessed the turning of gears and whistling of steam became so familiar to her that they were what she thought of when she heard the word home.

She twirled her bracelet around once more. She wondered if her mother ever thought of machines like she did. Like friends.

She shook her head. She barely got to know anything about her mother. It was only when her grandmother got ill did that change. She would call her to her chamber and ask her about her life and her interests. Amaris was more than surprised when she started doing that. Her grandmother was even crueler than her aunt. Tt least, Cynthia gave her the time of day, even if it was just to insult her. Her grandmother used to completely ignore her existence. She once heard that it was her late grandfather that refused to throw her in the streets after her mother’s death. She was kept in that mansion simply as a respect to his last wish. Her grandmother was the one that ordered she be kept out of sight and reside in the servants quarters. If it wasn’t for Vanya’s friendship and secret aid when she was eight, Amaris wouldn’t even know how to read or write. She was the one who taught her the basics and Amaris continued from there.

So she couldn’t imagine why her grandmother was suddenly interested in her. In a few months she turned into a loving relative. Gifting her dresses and scolding her for not taking care of herself. She would have her come to her room every day and read to her, or have lunch with her or to simply talk to her.

Amaris guessed that it must have been the guilt eating at her when she felt like her end was nearing. Nevertheless, Amaris hungrily took all the love and attention she gave her, like a dying traveler in the middle of the Oblivion desert would treasure every drop of water he could get. This was the one and only time her pride lost to her longing.

Amaris had once gathered the courage to ask her about her mother. And though her grandmother’s expression darkened, she did answer her. She told her about how cheerful and optimistic her mother was. How her name, Asterin, meant star, and she shined brighter than any star or person the world had ever known. She was the eldest, and the most beautiful of her daughters. She was the most powerful weaver her family has ever had, and her voice could grow a seed to a tree on the other side of the city.

She had a line of suitors who wanted to have her weaving in their bloodline. Rich suitors. respectable men. One in particular, her grandmother had said, was completely in love with her after a dance. But then, she had added, bitterness in her voice, your father walked into her life.

Amaris sensed that she shouldn’t drain the luck the heavens gifted her and push her any further. So she stopped. But she wished she could know what happened. Why her mother chose a relationship with someone who didn’t even give her the shelter of marriage, then left her with a child and ran.

But she couldn’t ask. Now she was here, miles away from Oddelerie with a whole stack of unanswered questions and her mother’s silver bracelet.

She sighed as she pushed the already half opened door and walked into the room. She was surprised to see the lights on.

“Oh, good. You’re here.” Amaris scanned the room to find Mecheye on the other side of the engine, a compartment open in front of him and a can of oil in hand. the ‘metal hoop’ Amaris had seen attached to his necklace was now placed on his right eye, a few glass lenses coming in and out of the metal circle, his hazel eye, magnified by the small machine.

“I need your help.” he said.

She stepped closer and noticed the set of gears he took out of place and the small notebook he had on the side. A pistol, just like the one Ash had been helping her wield for the past three days, sat in a corner, as if it belonged right with the toothed wheels and wrenches.

“You’ve done a great job with the broken gear, but these are close behind too,” he pointed at the gears on the table. “for now we just need to oil them and as soon as we reach land, I’ll send Ash to get some new ones.”

Amaris nodded “Aren’t you supposed to be resting?” she asked, still eyeing the pistol.

He shot her a guilty smile. “Supposed to be, but I snuck out.” He readjusted the small device. “Took me a week’s worth of berryjam to convince Sly not to tell on me. I can’t believe I had to bribe him to let me do my job.” He muttered as he wiped a gear with a rag.

She sat down next to him and started oiling the pieces too.

“They’re worried about you.” she stated.

He nodded. “I know. But I feel much better working down here than I do laying in my cot all day.”

“I understand that. How’s your shoulder?”

“Better. How’s your training?”

“Better.” During the past three days she made a huge amount of progress. Begrudgingly, she had to admit that Ash was good with guns. And he was good at teaching about them too. She still couldn’t hit moving targets or at large distances but when push comes to shove, which she hoped never will, she would be able to defend herself.

“Good. That means in a week or two you can move to swords. I’m better with those than with guns. But they’re only useful at close ranges. I can help you train.”

“I won’t be here in a week or two.”

Mecheye dropped the gear with a clang and it rolled away. “What?”

Amaris stood up to pick it from the floor. “Hopefully, we would have reached land by then. I’ll board a passenger ship and go on from there.”

“Why?” He asked seeming stunned.

“I’m sorry but with all the respect I have for you and everyone on this ship, I’m still not trying to get myself killed. And joining a rebellion against the most powerful king in the history of the grey sea isn’t exactly a good way to stay alive.”

Mecheye nodded, and though he seemed like he wanted to say something, he didn’t.

They worked in silence for what felt like the most peaceful hour Amaris had had since she boarded this ship.

They placed the gears back into place and were about to close the compartment when slygrin came in.

“I knew I’d find you here.” he said as soon as he spotted her.

“Did you want something?”

“Yes, Hawk’s telling you to get ready. We reach land in an hour.”

****