Saving Harper

"What do you mean you forgot?! You don't just forget a scheduled meeting with an author's agent Daisy! You have a fucking calendar and a planner so ano pang saysay if you don't use it?! And why didn't you even send me a reminder? You had a fucking week to tell me! Ano ba naman kahit post-it nag iwan ka dito sa lamesa ko?! Post-it nalang yan ha! Or even send me a text since you're always on your damn phone! Pati ba yon hirap na hirap kang gawin??? Do you know what this can do???" I said aloud as I massaged my temples. It's taking a lot of my strength not to hurl something at Daisy, my assistant who was standing in front of my desk.

I've been having a stressful day already but my patience took a nosedive when she just informed me NOW of a missed important meeting with an author's agent this afternoon that she forgot to remind me this week. It was only Tuesday and I felt like ending the week already. I swear tumatanda ako ng maaga dito sa assistant ko.

"Paulit-ulit na tayo dito, Daisy! This is the third instance in the last 2 weeks you failed to remind me either of an important meeting or a communicated message. That's like the basic requirement of your job. And you don't learn a thing! Wala ka kasing ginawa kung hindi mag Instagram!" I stared at my incompetent assistant who was already in tears.

Sa totoo lang, wala nakong awang mabibigay. Ako yung mawawalan ng trabaho if I keep tolerating this. I've had enough. I don't have any patience for this level of inefficiency. To think na scheduling nalang ang pinapagawa ko sa kanya. Ni hindi ko na nga sya pinapasama sa meeting at pinapareview ng manuscripts kasi baka pati yon hindi nya magawa. Well, for sure, hindi nya magagawa yon.

"You're fired." I finally said.

"Ms. Javier, please..." She started to appeal to me I silenced her with a deadly look. She knows well enough not to try and reason with me anymore. She hurried out of my office and I glared at the door as she left. Swerte pa sya na gabi ko sya pinaalis. Hindi sya mapapahiya sa harap ng madaming tao dahil wala na din halos tao dito sa office.

Remorse would be the last feeling I would have for her. In fact, I should've fired her a long time ago. As I've said, It wasn't the first time this happened and pinalagpas ko lang yung mga nauna kasi nagawan ko din agad ng paraan. But potentially, this careless mistake could lose one particular author my boss wanted me to acquire.

I threw a manuscript I was reviewing at the wall sa gigil. I massaged my temples again, while thinking of a way to save my assistant's former assistant's costly blunder.

I dialed the agent's number, hoping against hope he's in a good mood to accept my apology and would still agree to schedule a meeting with me. Again.

"I just saw your third assistant for the past two months running away while crying. Anong nangyari?" Franco Alturas, the head of Creatives Department here in Carte Publishing House where I work as a Managing Editor, entered my office right after my conversation with Jeremy Angeles the agent of the author my boss kept raving about.

He picked up the manuscript I threw against the wall and smiled mischievously. Alam na nya kung paano ako mang gigil and it wasn't the first time he picked up things from the floor of my office. He placed it on my table. May idea na sya kung anong nangyari at nawalan nanaman ako ng assistant.

"Tanga grabe! She forgot to remind me the meeting with Jeremy Angeles this afternoon! She was the one who placed the appointment in the calendar last week tangina." I pinched the bridge of my nose. I can feel a migraine building up. Franco took a seat on my couch. Amused at my usual rant about my assistant.

"Why didn't she just sync the calendar on her laptop to your phone?" He asked smiling. Pati ngiti nya nakakainis. Well di naman nakakainis si Franco. We're good friends since we came to the company at the same time. In fact, we dated for a while. Pero sabi nya pinagpapalit ko daw sya sa trabaho so we just agreed to be friends.

Actually, mas beneficial para saamin to just remain friends kasi sa totoo lang I can't remember how to maintain a romantic relationship so sooner or later, mag hihiwalay din kami sa kawalan ko ng ability sa romance department. Aminado naman ako sa mga hindi ko kayang gawin, and keeping a relationship is one of them. The only relationship I have lately (or for the longest time) was with my work. I've tried dating before Franco and it was a disaster so ayoko na talaga. I've gotten the hang of being alone. Sad ba? I haven't decided on that yet.

I rolled my eyes and groaned. "Don't fucking remind me. Hindi daw sya marunong kahit ang dali-dali nalang non! I asked her a week ago to have IT teach her how. Pero ginawa ba nya? Hindi! I swear, diba dapat yung mga bata marunong gawin yon? I don't get why I'm so unfortunate when it comes to assistants."

Is it too much to ask for a decent assistant? Yung marunong sumunod at yung hindi ko na kailangan turuan kung anong gagawin nya kasi dumodoble lang yung trabaho ko? Hindi ko na alam kung nasasabi ba ng HR kung ano yung bare minimum sa trabaho nila. Like it's hard. I internally rolled my eyes at that.

Natawa nanaman si Franco as he leaned back getting comfortable sa usual nyang pwesto dito pag pumupunta sya para makipag chikahan at mangamusta. "Relax. Harper, ang sungit mo kasi. Natataranta yang mga fresh grad na yan sayo." I frowned at him. "Hindi ako mag susungit kung hindi sila tanga. I think I need an older assistant."

"Mumurahin mo parin naman yon. Saka mas lalung hindi yon marunong mag operate ng laptop." Franco joked. "Sabi ko older di ko sinabing senior citizen." I retorted.

Baka nga mas okay pa yung mga senior citizen kasi at least yon may years of work experience na. Pero sa totoo lang naging fresh grad din naman ako so di ko maintindihan kung bakit parang walang common sense yung mga napupunta sakin na assistant the past two months.

At hindi lang walang common sense ang dami pang character flaws ng mga yon na ang sakit talaga sa ulo. Yung una, sinimangutan ko lang, umiyak na agad and pag madami na kong pinapagawa, tarantang-taranta na at hindi na makapagisip. Fifth day palang nya dapat, di na pumasok ulit. Yung pangalawa, sinisigawan ko na from my office para tawagin di parin sumasagot kasi nakikinig lang sa Spotify or nanonood ng kung ano-ano, hindi pa marunong mag check ng emails from time to time. And then there's Daisy na mas makakalimutin pa kay Dory. I don't think I was being unreasonable for firing all of them.

"O, relax lang. Makakahanap ka din ng maayos na assistant. I'm sure may lima ng nakapilang assistant para sayo yung HR. Ano palang nangyari kay Jeremy? Makukuha ba ni boss yung next mystery thriller genius nya?" He joked again about my assistant problems. Di malayong mangyari na may nakapila ng mga assistant para sakin yung HR. Sanay na silang walang nakakatagal sakin. If there's something I hate when it comes to work, it's stupidity over small things you should be able to do.

"I swear kung wala lang gusto yang Jeremy na yan sakin, di na nya ko pagbibigyan sa meeting pero tomorrow na agad. Though I think better na din. I just hope I'm not yet too late. Malamang maganda yung offer ng PBK."

"I'm sure mas maganda yung offer mo. You've never failed to get an author. Samahan kita. I want to see this kid. Nabasa ko yung manuscript nya and wow." He told me casually.

"Wow is an understatement. Andrei is really something. Kaya hinahabol din sya ng PBK Publishing. Mawawalan ako ng trabaho pag di ko to nakuha. 9am yung meeting bukas sa UCC 6750 Makati, if sasama ka. Dun nako dederetcho." I started fixing my things. I needed to get home.

It's almost 11pm already and nakakapagod na tong araw na to. Apat na sunod-sunod na meetings yung pinuntahan ko at yung pinaka importante pa yung nakalimutan ng tanga kong assistant.

Well eto din naman yung usual kong uwi, as if naman may naghihintay sakin sa condo ko. Ni halaman walang nabubuhay saakin.

"Yeah, sige I'll be there." Franco said and tumayo na din sya, probably also leaving to go home. Kami usually yung nagsasara ng opisina sa pag oovertime. "Mag pahinga ka na. You'll definitely need your charm tomorrow." He chuckled. "Haha funny. Sige, tomorrow. See you." I bade him goodbye as he left my office.

The meeting the following day went great, which was more than I expected or could even pray for. The "kid" author Franco called was actually still in college and his work was really impressive. These were the new blood writers we want to acquire for the publishing house. And he and his agent agreed to our terms after some negotiations and they will wait for our official contract for signing. Buti nalang mas maganda yung offer namin kesa sa competitor and the author's demands were workable. Kailangan unahan ko na lang sa papers baka masulot pa.

Di ko na talaga trabaho yung mag acquire ng authors since napromote nako, but if there are 'prized' authors my boss wanted to get, he sends me to take care of it.

"I told you charm mo lang kailangan." Franco smiled at me shaking his head. "What?" I frowned at him, asking what's behind the shaking of his head. "Funny na ang charming mo pag dating sa mga agents and writers pero kinakatakutan ka dito." Hirit nya pag labas namin sa elevator ng office. Inirapan ko sya and made a face nung naghiwalay na kami papunta sa kanya-kanyang office namin.

Pag dating ko sa area ko, nakita kong may lalakeng naka upo na sa assistant's desk, working on the laptop my previous assistant left. Mukhang sya yung replacement assistant. I guess totoo ngang may pila sa HR.

He looked at me as I headed towards him and to my office na katapat ng desk nya. "What's your name?" I asked him.

"Xavier Arnaiz." He answered me directly. Wow, no 'maam' or 'Ms. Javier'. Well wala naman din akong pakielam kung tawagin nya kong maam or hindi dahil mas nakakatanda pa nga yung maam. Basta ang importante, alam nya yung ginagawa nya.

"Xavier. Well, that's easy enough to remember. I need my coffee, black. I trust you already know how to work a laptop. We'll start you off with scheduling muna so please sync the calendar in there with my phone. And put in your number as well. Passcode is 131313." I handed him my phone and dumeretcho nako papasok sa office ko.

Dati kinukulit ako ni Franco na makipag pustahan sa kanya kung gaano kabilis lang yung itatagal ng next assistant ko. Di ako pumapayag kasi sa totoo lang ayoko lang malaman na tama sya sa mga hula nya. I'm sure nakahanap naman sya ng ibang kapustahan don. I wonder how long this one will actually last.

As soon as I sat down sa upuan ko, tinawagan ko yung boss ko using the office landline in my room. "George I have good news, we have Andrei Salvador. As you wanted." I told him. My boss also refused to let us call him "sir". "Great! I knew you'd close this! Talk to Marketing and Publicity. I want printing to start as soon as he signs the papers. Promotion, gusto mo?" He said happily. Matagal na syang excited to bag this author.

"Pag prinomote mo pa ko, ikaw na papalitan ko. And George, you skipped the editing part. Siguro nga dapat palitan na kita." I sarcastically told him. He laughed.

"Yeah, well that's why I have you so you can make sure things don't crumble here."

"Then stop giving me crappy assistants." I told him. And sakto naman, pumasok si Xavier with my coffee and phone which he wordlessly placed on my table and smiled at me while surveyed me for a while before leaving. Jusko parang feeling ko najudge nako agad. I wasn't exactly saying that he's crappy. His predecessors were.

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"Hindi ako Human Resources, Harper. Pero kung gusto mo ng tatlong assistant, bibigyan kita ng lima. Anyway, good job! I'll talk to Legal." My boss finally said. Muntik ko ng isagot na isang matinong assistant nga di ako mabigyan, lima pa. "I already did. I'm meeting them after lunch." I told him. Medyo makakalimutin din kasi tong boss namin. Mukhang kasalanan ko din dahil nasanay syang ako na gumagawa lahat.

"Perfect! Konti nalang aampunin na kita." He said good-naturedly. I'm sure kung kaya nyang gawin yon, nagawa na nya.

"Bye, dad." I replied then put the phone down.

My boss' children doesn't want anything to do with his publishing company. Both are in the US with their mother after mag hiwalay ng boss ko at ng asawa nya. So medyo worried sya na walang mag mamana ng company nya. Families are so complicated. But I also pushed that thought at the back of my mind. Ganon din kasi ako.

I vehemently rejected my parents' orders for me to go to med school. I came from a VERY long line of doctors at ako lang ang hindi. Well, pati pala yung cousin ko na si Jem who I'm close with kasi kaming dalawa yung ayaw na umaattend ng family reunions dahil syempre left out kami. Ang difference lang namin, pumasok sya ng med school for one year. Jem is now a university professor in Biology while taking her master's degree at the same time. At kahit gaano pa kataas yung narating namin, we can't seem to get our parents' approval that we rightly chose a different path for ourselves. Na in a way, natanggap na namin.

It was hard growing up wanting different things from my parents. Nagmumukha lang akong black sheep sa mata ng lahat ng mga kaibigan nila. The prodigal daughter who might not be smart enough for med school. It didn't help na I have two other sisters who followed my parents' footsteps. Holly the eldest, just finished her residency, and Hilda the youngest, will be starting with hers after nyang mag pakasal six months from now.

The three of us used to be close nung lumalaki kami. But we drifted apart after kong mag high school, nung nag decide akong wag mag med school. And I got out of that house as soon as I can. Ano pang nalabel na din naman akong prodigal daughter, totohanin ko na.

I dialed my new assistant's number who answered on the second ring. "Hi Xavier, please buy me lunch. Padeliver ka sa Sweet Ecstasy. I want the cheeseburger with caramelized onions and the coffee shake. I forgot the name basta yon. And samahan mo na din ng ecstasy fries. Get yourself something as well if you want. I'll leave my company credit card on your desk. Thanks." I hurriedly said.

"Okay, Harper." He replied, his voice was full of amusement and ended the call. I can't believe how appealing my name sounded with his voice. Puta. I quickly shook that away.

I went out to leave my credit card on his desk and wala sya don. I checked my phone, and lo and behold, my calendar of meetings was already synced with his computer complete with alerts. Good job.

Baka din naman ganon lang talaga makipag usap si Xavier hindi lang ako sanay? At wala talagang maam. Mukha naman din kasi kaming mag kaedad lang. What is he doing working as an assistant? Pero di ako nagrereklamo lalu na dahil so far maayos naman sya. I guess I just need to get used to his way of talking to me pati sa voice nyang nag eecho sa utak ko pagtapos nya kong kausapin (annoying fact). And I also have to get used to having a male assistant. Baka eto na yung hinihintay ko kasi I've never had a male assistant before. At least pag lalake hindi sensitive yung feelings.

I made some more calls and after an hour, dumating na yung food ko. Xavier entered carrying it with my card which I signaled for him to keep it while typing on my laptop, para na din sa future kong ipapaorder na pagkain at ipapabiling kung ano-ano. "Thanks." I said.

He came back and placed a glass of water beside my food. Wow, so far may extra service na agad. Though he was still eyeing me. Nakaka conscious na ng konti.

He's really cute. Gwapo actually. Siguro sinadya ng HR na bigyan ako ng gwapong assistant para di uminit yung ulo ko palagi.

"By the way, I have an urgent meeting with the Printing Department Supervisor tomorrow, can you move my 10am meeting with Marketing to 2pm?" I asked looking up from my laptop. His smile was really distracting. Parang aliw na aliw sya sakin.

"Yeah, no problem, I'll notify Marketing. Enjoy lunch and don't forget your meeting at 1pm." He said then left my room. Nakakagulat dahil finally, I have a decent assistant. So far. And really good looking kaya ako nadidistract, now that nakaharap ko na sya and natignan ng maigi. I think ilang beses ko na ding naisip na gwapo sya. Like every time he enters my office.

After the meeting with Legal, I went to another one and another one and before I knew it, gabi na. I went back to my office and I was surprised to see Xavier inside. "I thought you might want dinner. Franco told me you work late, so I'll just be outside if you need anything." He said as he placed a paper bag on my desk, which I figured was food.

"Xavier, you don't need to work late. I think I got everything. I just need you to get some first drafts from Alice, one of the editors. Umm, sya yung may pink na hair so you won't miss her. Thanks for the food. And did Franco need anything?" I asked him. I didn't know he knew Franco already. "No. He just called to ask if you were done with your meeting. The manuscripts are already on your table." He pointed at the stack. Nagulat nanaman ako. Tinaasan ko sya ng kilay. "It was on your reminders, so I got them kanina. And don't worry, sanay akong mag trabaho ng late. I'll find something to do until makauwi ka na." He gave me another one of his gwapo smiles. Medyo nag space out ako. Di ako sure kung dahil sa ngiti nya or dahil di ko na pala sya kailangan utusan. Or both. I need to find a way not to get too distracted pag nandito sya.

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"Wow, thanks. Good job on your first day. Mukhang di ako mahihirapan sayo." I said walking towards my chair. "I don't think you will." He said in a playful tone. Wait. Is he flirting?

How would I know? I don't think anyone ever flirted with me recently. Four years ago pa yun to be exact. Si Franco yung huli, and honestly, Franco was more like in-your-face flirting. And I never really had the time to flirt.

Simula ng pumasok ako dito, I've been working tirelessly to get to this position. Eto na yung naging buhay ko. I had no time for dates, not even on weekends dahil tinatamad akong lumabas. The last vacation I had was last year nung niyaya ako ni Jem and my best friend Olivia sa Singapore. They even had to book my ticket and witness me pack in person just to be sure na sasama ako. And inis na inis sila saakin dahil nagtatrabaho parin ako pag balik namin sa hotel. "If you need me, I'm just outside, should I close the door?" ;Xavier asked habang palabas na sya.

"No, just leave it open." I said. For the first time.

He was in my direct line of vision. Omg Harper, may crush ka ba sa assistant mo? No. I can't. He's my assistant jusko! I opened the paper bag and he got me mushroom ravioli.

God, thank you! Finally, someone I wanted. I mean as an assistant.

As I read the drafts while eating, I found myself stealing glances at him from time to time. Ngayon ko lang napansin that he has another computer opened. Baka nag papalit sya? He looked busy. Di ko alam kung saan but he looked serious. Well I don't mind if he's doing something else, wala naman akong pinapagawa sa kanya so ok lang. I decided to concentrate on what I was doing. I moved to my couch after eating para mas kumportable and para di na din ako tingin ng tingin kung saan-saan.

Di ko namalayan na nakatulog na pala ako until Xavier shook me sa balikat to wake me up. "Harper, did you need anything?" He asked me. Nagulat ako and sat up straight. Huh? "What?" I asked him nagtataka sa tanong nya. "Ummm tinawag mo ko." Natatawa nyang sabi.

Puta ano??? E nakatulog nga ako.

Oh fuck. Was I calling him habang tulog ako dahil nasa panaginip ko sya???? I panicked deep inside. POTA. Wala naman akong naaalalang panaginip ko.

"Ah, yeah, I was about to ask for coffee kasi I can barely stay awake. Pero late na din, I should head home." I looked at my watch dahil ayoko na syang tignan to check if naniniwala sya sa excuse ko. At nagising nako kahit walang kape from the horror I was feeling.

Tangina why would I even call out his name habang tulog ako??? This is beyond humiliating.

"Ah okay. Sige mukhang kailangan mo na nga umuwi. Mag pahinga ka na." He said trying hard not to smile too much. Di ko alam kung ginagago nya ko dahil he's not buying my lie one bit.

Nag ayos nako ng gamit and decided not to bring any work home kasi mukhang kailangan ko ng matinong tulog para di nako ulit nakakatulog dito sa opisina. I was surprised kasi mukhang di pa uuwi si Xavier who was still working on something on his computer. Ayoko na syang tanungin kung ano yon kahit may karapatan pakong tanungin. Ayoko naman mag mukhang curious masyado sa ginagawa nya. Masyado ka lang conscious. Gaaaaahhhhddd.

"Bye. Good night." I said as I walked past him after closing my office door. "Good night, Harper." Naaaliw nyang sabi saakin pero di ko na nakita kung nakangiti sya.

Di ko alam kung imagination ko lang ba, pero I thought I heard him mutter "Don't dream of me too much.", while I was still near enough to hear it.

I take it back, mukhang mahihirapan ako sa assistant ko na to. And not because of work.