Runaway Devil

"I have stashes of human weapons all over the country, as well as clothes and other essentials."

I listened without emotion, slipping back into a soldier's mindset. I had to disconnect from the situation and look at things objectively. Not too difficult, especially coming from someone who had used that as crutch their whole life. Whenever there was anything that could cause uncomfortable emotion, which was often while fighting a war that wasn't your own, I shut the emotion out. When I was a child, sitting in the barracks, I would conjure the storm that slithered just beneath the surface. It would peek out from behind the heavy curtain, and before it could step out, I would shove it back and quell the tightness in my throat. One second my eyes were filled with tears and the next they were dryer than the deserts we hunted wild beasts in. I saw it as a game. How many times could I do it on command? How fast could I shut it down? How long could I resist?

"Are you listening to me?" Alec sounded impatient. "You need to understand that we need to play by my rules. We can't go in guns blazing, okay?" I was insulted.

"You think I'm a child? Do you think I don't know how to hunt and kill these shit stains? I wasn't just a soldier, angel. You best remember that." The Elite was not only the demon's secret weapon, but we were the behind the scenes special operations team. Political threats, exiled demons, a town that no longer served its purpose, all of them would be our responsibility. We were the council's dogs. They said kill, and it was done. I scowled at the memories.

Alec watched me for a moment, giving me a respectful silence. He nodded and stood from my kitchen table. "We should leave within the week. Every day that goes by I can feel them getting closer."

"We can leave tomorrow, I'm ready," I stood and rolled my shoulders, releasing tension. "Locate the first target. I have a few things to take care of first."

The hours of preparation, after a sleepless night, were quiet. Alec had next to nothing to pack. His things were spread out, not too many things in one place. I didn't have that luxury. I pulled a duffel bag from the back of my closet and haphazardly stuffed clothes in it. I included both long-sleeved and short-sleeved shirts and pants I could fight in. The weapons I already had in my possession, a Glock, and a couple of knives were strategically placed on my person.

I had my last cup of coffee from my shitty coffee maker and unplugged it. I notified the right school officials about my long upcoming absence and I knew I needed to make a couple of house calls. I would use my last day to say goodbye.

First was Joel. I hadn't seen him in a couple of weeks since I had finished his latest piece. He was one of the few friends I had made in this small town, and it felt shitty to leave without a goodbye. I told Alec to stay around the corner, I knew that Joel seeing a strange man behind me while I told him I would be going away for a while would raise questions. But I took Balan with me, I knew that he would want to say goodbye in his own way.

I took a deep breath and stared at his front door. The white paint looked fresh, and the deck recently was redone. I imagined what it would feel like to stand on it with bare feet on a warm summer evening, watching Sophie chase fireflies in the yard. I felt my heartbeat against my sternum and I had to catch my breath.

I knocked before I lost the courage. There was some shuffling behind the door, someone calling into another room, and a little giggle. Maria stood in the doorway with a pleasantly surprised smile. Some of her hair had escaped her ponytail and she had a dishtowel over her shoulder. "Kara, hey." Her smile made my chest feel empty. These were good people, and I would probably never see them again. "To what do we own this pleasure?" She glanced down at Balan and give him his greeting.

"Kitty!" Sophie clumsily bounded towards the door, almost tripping over the doorjamb. I knelt and grinned at her, opening my arms for her to fall into. I could feel her face-splitting smile against my shoulder. I stood with her in my arms and stepped inside, following Maria. Their home smelled of cleaning supplies and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. It smelled like a family's home.

"I actually just wanted to swing by to say... goodbye," I said. Maria stopped in the middle of the hallway and looked at me like a concerned mother would her child. Balan walked quietly and respectfully at my side.

"Where are you going?" I could hear Joel ask from the backyard who was at the door. "Kara," She yelled over her shoulder without breaking eye contact. "Come sit, tell us what's going on, hon."

She lead me to the backyard, where Joel was fixing their grill. He smiled wide in greeting. "Hey baby girl, I haven't seen you for a hot minute." We went through the motions of catching up, small talk before Maria revisited the purpose of my visit.

"So, you said something about going away?" It was a mom question, one that was simple but teased more out of you than you wanted to tell.

"Yeah, I'm going on a little trip, and I wanted to let you guys know. I'm kind of going off the grid." I nodded while I spoke, like a high school senior who was talking about their plans for the future.

"Cool, where are you heading?" Joel wiped some gristle from his thick fingers and sat with us. Sophie stumbled around the yard, trying to get Balan to play with her. He followed closely and bent his head towards her whenever she lost her footing. He sniffed the area around her, making sure that the squeals coming from her tiny mouth were ones of joy.

"I'm going to be moving from here to there, kind of just letting the wind take me wherever," I could hear how ridiculous I sounded. I stood, suddenly wanting to get the hell out of there. "But I'll see you guys again, I'll be back," I said it with a reassuring smile. "Balan, come." Joel stood with Maria. He hugged me, squeezing me like a father dropping his child off at college would. Maria was the same, but I could sense her hesitation. I was young, and their parental instincts told them I was making a bad decision.

"Soph, come say bye-bye," Joel said. She teetered over on her chunky toddler legs. Her hug was brief and impatient. She turned, without looking at me again, and went about her toddler business.

On my way out the door, I rubbed my eyes, not looking forward to any other farewells.

Bethany stood on the sidewalk outside the shop. The paintbrush in her hands looked natural like it was an extension of her arm. She used smooth, sweeping motions, letting the paint compliment the graffiti under it, rather than cover it.

"Hey, Beth." She turned with a smile.

"Hey, you weren't supposed to come in today." She looked happy to see me anyway. I put my hands in my pockets, trying to hide in plain sight. Alec stood behind me with Balan sitting by his feet. She looked at me a second too long and her expression fell. "What?" The panic in her voice broke my heart.

"I-"

"What happened?" She put down her brush and stepped closer, holding my upper arms. Her grip tightened when I didn't say anything. Why was this so hard? I had slaughtered armies, fought wild beasts for fun, and was forced into servitude my whole life. And I couldn't say goodbye to these humans. I rubbed my hand down my face and sighed. "Are you in trouble? What's going on? You're scaring me."

"No, nothing's wrong. I just-" I looked her in the eye. Her black eyeliner made her eyes shine brighter than they already were. "I'm going to be on the road for a while. I'm taking a trip."

Her silence was deafening. She didn't move, her mouth stayed in a deep frown, almost like it was cemented on her face. The seconds ticked by, my heart counting them one by one.

"This is your choice?" She glanced at Alec then back to me. I nodded. "Is it because you're not safe here?" I shook my head and thought, No, it's because you aren't safe with me here. "Will you have your phone?" I nodded again, unable to find words, and not trusting the words I may stumble upon.

She held my face in her hands while her eyes filled with tears she would refuse to let fall. She rested her forehead on mine and held me tight. "You be safe. And if I find out that you aren't, or if something happens, you'll have hell to pay." The tension broke with our chuckles, small, sad smiles peeking through.